In this occasion, rare thing in my, I am tired.

They have been saying that the devices that are not used atrophy, and possibly I let think of methodical way for too much time.

A valuable person yesterday speaks with L ******, but that she has a rare life. Thursday I knew A **** and to its friend Z *****, but that is not the important thing.

In my life two months of something extremely special and personal are marked today, of which it made raise the glance me and recover the faith. But now the payment comes, nothing is free. The payment is simple, and complicated. I have answered other peoples questions, and I have not been able to answer the own ones, I know all my questions, but no longer they interest the answers to me. At this moment I am tired, but of 4 years without vacations in the work, two years of pressure strange in the same work, and things that begin to take their course.

I do not wait for one compensates, and she either is not that he is too altruistic, to act of another one, way would kill to me, but I am not tired to help to people but of something but.

Possibly single it happens that in my times of youth it could prevent the damages to others, now, per moments it is too much for my, and I limit myself to control the damages that others receive.

It begins to hurt the head to me in the later part, which means that I am using much the PC, that it is not reason why I do in the nights, but single the pressure of the last days (from the 5), that I am using in the work three computers simultaneously. IN normal situations it is possible to handle worse things, but my body warns to me through that involuntary pain, that I am tiring it. That I will hold one or two years but to this rate of work, but I must recover or transform in tree of firewood and not of fruits. With most of people when they are tired does not pass anything, but in my case, to be tired it releases that instinctive part that does what is correct.

He is something that wave extraction a little, is like feeling that I am falling asleep in a chair, and which I have in my hand a sharpened axe.

But already, today and tomorrow Sunday I will fall asleep many hours in that lethargy without dreams, and will leave fresh and cleared.

Today two months of a stage are marked. And it hurts. but single the voluntary sacrifice has some value, and that sometimes the correct thing can be too demanding, but in the long run, is its right to be. A time ago I spent nights whole waiting for the news, or a key, and that key never arrived. Sometimes one does not find reasons because simply there are no reasons, single something irrational and autodestructive, then, single they serve the senses, and that they are the senses? They are the sensible instrument but of approach to the world, when they are thus, FELT.

There are many traditions that speak of the angel guardian, or the familiar spirits, or others. Some people create in the inner light, single I believe in doing what must become, in the voice of silence. I am a normal person, with exception of my training, but already it says the Law to it of the similarity of Frazer, the causes tend to be created after the consistent imitation of the effects.

In other words, it does not concern that I am, who I will be, who could be or who I was. It concerns acting since I must do it, because if the things are worth the trouble of being done, it is worth the trouble to do them well.

The sky gains with hands, and with the heart, directed by a brain.

What demands my to have, and that for me is sufficient, now and always.

Meanwhile, my head hurts, it requests rest, and at this moment it sounds the beeper. " Critical Fault in the system 2 office 3 ". My to have it demands to fix it already, but not my work.

IF something is worth the trouble to do it, it is necessary to do it, and already.

I write after several hours, the previous thing lets write it to 7 in the morning.

It was tired, for natural reasons.

After the office 3, I went to see a possible client by outside, that it hoped that it did a program to him of 1500 dollars in 700, the only thing that we decided was a program of 700 dollars, and that will obtain. The contract is signed, the ready data, average afternoon of work tomorrow, and the program this ready one to be implanted in three sessions, throughout a month.

Not like explaining it, there are things that are natural, and would not have to be it, or it would not have to take them like so.

Tired being would have to say to me that it rests, or at least, that others would be lamented. But I do not do it. But in cold, I understand that the defeats and the falls are part of the training, because that that has not fallen, cannot rise, and without that impulse, never there are victories.

Thinking about that the life would have to do something, I received beepers of D ****, saying to me that it was in line, we spoke three or 4 hours, she from cibercoffee;. Being in different countries creates strange situations. I do not understand because after N **** drifted single, it has passed all this.

It will be that I need to have to who to protect, to be the guardian? Why at the moment at which the communication was closed with N ****, appears three people who need my aid? I do not know it. But who I am, and that demands my to have to me.

The chat with D **** remembered a strange stage to me of my life, that stage of my youth in which my arm was destroyed almost, the time at which the battles were physical and nonmoral, when it was normal that a beautiful lady in hardships, said to me, because to my? Because beams this? Because you always dedicate as much time to me?

And it is difficult that they understand it. Because there are people who are worth it, and although sometimes she is interested in those people, she is what my to have she demands of my, and my oath. The good people must be protected; I cannot give them to health or wealth, because those are their battles, but if I can be when it is needed to me. And for some reason if the person does not call to me with beeper, something says to me that it marks the telephone or between a Internet, and always. the same, to be received with " was thinking about you." Holy Shit. That is the blessing that torments.

It is so difficult to find people with anger and desire to live, that sometimes I feel that most looks for to throw itself on the feet of badly, saying itself of things, incapable to see its virtues. I do not try to redeem them, because the one that walks of redentor finishes in a cross, but am still young although my youth has gone away, and believes that it is time to change the way to face the world.

I have the energy to make the readjustment, and is time to go out, not to try to recover my life, because that not can; but if to leave to the places where they are the pieces that lack to complete the puzzle.

To be arranged to fight and to face the world, is not enough. The correct battles must be fought, and I see that almost 8 years ago, I forgot Kanryodo, which could call the skin of buffalo of my youth.

The wounds close again, at the moment at which I decide that it is time to happen to the battle, because the only form to stay prepared is through the fight, I do not believe that the life is " a school where all we must learn ", but that is peace and not it war the one that destroys the men.

Some choose to be pariahs, others to be sold, but after all single the spirit of the man counts. At this moment he sounds ICQ. Looks for a German to Me whom he loves to know if I can translate parts of my homepage to english. It is good idea, and to practice the English will not be bad.

When writing these notes, something is shaken in my, that part that sometimes scares to others, I do not write with the heart of the wolf, but with the heart of the rock; the rocks serve to raise a house or like a weapon.

So we take advantage of that human impulse, we begin to leave things them comply in the mind.

I have 13 years of still being able physical, to the 40 I will have to change my way of life, because no longer I will have the energy of the hipertiroidism. So extend the wings, but not them wings of the eagle, but those of the thought.

I am in a situation in which I cannot lose. I am single, is my strength and my weakness. In the last two months returned things and people to my life. If they are with the Law and the order, or if they are good people, there I will be. What matters is the person in if; its actions and their way of being. And although sometimes the claws of the wolf are good, a wolf cannot fight the battles that need suit three pieces. Because it concerns the content and it does not form it, so it is time to forget to me considerations like these notes; because within my, I hear the call of the voice of silence, the voice that teaches, and decides.

I say that I cannot lose, because the people who are to my around that they are worth the trouble, they will follow with me, and if they cannot, justice will call replacements. And single the people count. The machines are annulled to each other, the person makes the difference.

It is the moment for choosing priorities and for deciding. I am on the verge of leaving the mountain. Because in spite of acting like man and not like wolf, the wolf of my interior says to me, go away, you do not have anything to do here.

And to where I go. I go to the place where the dawns, rain and the storm exist, where the fights do not get rid with the heart but with the thoughts. Because the time has arrived to change uniform, it concerns what my to have it demands of my, which I want is secondary. And what demands my to have it is to prepare me for the morning.

Until now I realize that the solitude almost made me profane the love giving it to it to a person, not by error of her, but mine, not to see what there was inside was my fault. So it is time to go to pay my sins, because the healthy love is noble, but the love to a person infuriates single corrupts.

If... the time arrives again from the battles with the hands of the man, because the eyes of the man see the things the light of the best day than the wolves.

Nonencounter the words, which indicates that I need energy. That the suitable person will come, but he is secondary. It is time to accept that people like D**** exist, or like L******, and that when it is the moment, will arrive, so it is time to fight, not being worthy of noble people, but to be able to continue watching me the eyes in the mirror.

          El deber antes que nada,
          Antes que el mismo mundo,
          antes que el mismo DIos.
          mas allá del tiempo.

Or in words of the shout of battle of years, that is lost no its use,

By the law, until the death!