A Rock Star

Today was haircut day. It really sucks cause I have to like drive to a city away and like its really bad for me cause I stare out the window too much and think about throwing myself out of the car and how I want to get my hair cut and then hating myself for wanting to get my hair cut like that and then wanting to throw myself out of the car for hating myself.

When we got to the haircut place called StuperCuts, this lady was like chinese and I was like "This is no haircutting place! This is where they cook dogs!" and then this old lady was like "Speak up sonny I cant hear you" and then I was like "THIS IS WHERE THEY COOK DOGS!" and then I smacked her in the face and she died. Then I took a seat in one of the chairs and there was this fat bald dude with a white t-shirt on that said "I ate Turkey" and he kept on staring at me and I was like "WHAT THE HELL?!" and he was like "ARGH" and then we started fighting and I got him in a headlock and I smashed his head into the M&M machine and he was like "CANDY!" and he started eating them off the floor.

Then I went and sat down again and then I saw an angel across the room behind the chinese lady. And the chinese lady was like "BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH POKE'MON" but all I could see was like the girl. And I was like "Major Boner" and I was like turn around turn around! and then the girl turned around and .... AND IT WAS HORRIBLE! IT WAS DEMON FROM BEYOND THE MOON! She looked like someone beat her head in with a rock. She ate an apple out of the ugly tree and choked on it. She was like 75 and going on up. Wrinkle Farm. This girl was not a girl she was a BEAST!

I ran out of the store and I will never go back there or any STUPERCUTS as long as I live as THE BEAST as my witness.