Writer on Hiatus
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Friday 13Apr07 5:17pm

I'm spent. I've done about 2 hours of writing so far this week and I actually decided I might just need to take a break. Give my mind a vacation or more like it, refocus my thoughts. What do I want? How can I adjust my efforts? How do I find balance? What do I need to do for myself? What do I do next?
It's kind of like sweating out a cold. I've got to stop and spend the time to focus on what ails me in order to cure it or me or whatever...

So that's why I've been quiet. I've started the major spring cleaning in my apartment and am slowly going through all my stuff to see what I can purge. Have decided to let go of my vinyl because Lord knows if I'll ever get another turntable (not like I have room for one).

I want to make room for a meditation area in my apartment so I need to move stuff around and pack some shit and all that. I really need to get back to a regular meditation practice to soothe my weary emotions.

I've made dates to get out more and went out a few times this week as well. Need to balance in a social life because it's gotten beyond pathetic and I actually have a lot of friends. Said my last goodbyes to Lolo last night as she leaves for Korea in two more sleeps. I had lunch with a friend I haven't seen in ten years since she was living in Japan and she'll be joining my breakfast buddy and I on Sunday for our weekly. I've got plans tomorrow night, I've got plans a couple nights next week. And I still have to call Ant and touch base and make plans with him. I've got shit to do.

But I'll still be here. Just had to take a break from being all writing and nothing else...

EY

Perceptive Perceptions
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
5:15pm Monday 9Apr07

Okay I've stopped hating the person who invited me to Facebook after having touched base with someone I lost track of 10 years ago! Seems she was in Japan for 10 years and just got back to Canada! We've made plans to have lunch together. Too exciting. Funny lady that did some very wild things in her past but has a heart of gold and always looks for ways to help people to succeed. How cool is that?

I shed a big ass crocodile tear when I had to get my ass out of bed this morning to go to work. It's not like I hate working but boy oh boy it's also really sweet not to have to work. And really, where does the time go? Did I accomplish any of the things I'd promise myself for the long weekend? Not a one! Slept like there was no tomorrow and it wasn't like I had any alcohol other than Thursday night and really Corona isn't even alcohol. Let's face it Corona is baby formula.

I was close to falling asleep at my desk for awhile this afternoon. Tired ass tired. Groggier than a hibernating bear awakened two months too early. I went for my afternoon coffee to get me moving and provide me with a faux hit of caffeine cuz really how much caffeine is there in Cinnamon Hazelnut versus the real man's coffee? I acted on a whim and crept up behind my sweet friend and gave him a cat kiss. (Basically rubbed my face against his unshaved face.) What a great exfoliant! All of a sudden I was super awake, eyes wide open like I was never going to conk out at my desk like a druggie. How is it that you could be ready to fall into a deep sleep one minute and then be hyper alert the next? And how do you find a way to pull that out at will?

It's like when you're leaving for vacation you can wake up at 4 am without an alarm and jump out of bed with all the energy of a person who has slept for a full eight hours. I want to access that energy on a daily basis. Just change gears in mid stream. I'll have to experiment with that one. Pretend that my fantasies have come true. Act like my day is going to be as great as a long vacation. Act expectant instead of hopeful. Yeah that's the ticket.

And can we sing it one more time?:

Love me now
Cuz I'm special
Not your average kind
Who'll accept every line that sounds good
So reach into your chain of thoughts
Try to find something new
What worked so well for you before
For me it just won't do.

Love me in a special way
what more can I say
LOVE ME NOW!

Yep I'm killing that song until my neighbour bangs on the wall! ha ha!

Cranky Tall Guy and Coma Boy had me laughing at them at lunch time with their patheticness. Both have to have something to read while they eat their lunch but both don't buy newspapers. The Gooseman normally brings a newspaper in everyday except he's on afternoons. Cranky was reading a small flyer for women's shoes out of desperation and Coma boy was reading the Toronto Sun from April 5th. When Cranky was done with the flyer he went in search of a Filipino paper to read (he's not Filipino!) Boys just bring a book!? Filipino boss feeling sorry for them went and got today's paper for their poor deprived reading souls.

Came home to toilet paper all over the place. Seems Zelda decided that a fight had to be had with the whole roll and she TP'd the apartment. The little psycho! Tonight we TP her!

EY

Tammy and her sister Ava
Topic: Another Entry
This is an indepth story about Tammy and Ava and Tammy's ultimate murder by her husband Tommy Kane... Tammy and Ava Shaikh

I wondered what happened
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Sunday 3:47pm 8Apr07

I had heard about the murder but never caught the news when the verdict was decided. I went to high school with this guy. He was arrogant then but who knew he'd kill his wife...

Domestic Abuse Site

Ex-NFL star Tommy Kane sentenced 18 years
Last Updated: Friday, November 5, 2004 | 4:06 PM ET
CBC Sports
Tommy Kane, the Montreal native who played wide receiver in the NFL and CFL, was sentenced to 18 years in prison on Friday.

In September, Kane pleaded guilty to manslaughter in connection with the stabbing death of his wife, Tammara Shaikh. Kane struck a controversial plea bargain with the Crown that reduced his charge to manslaughter from second-degree murder, sparking outrage and protests in Montreal.

In a 30-minute preface, Superior Court Justice Fraser Martin called the killing of Shaikh "a senseless act" by a "manipulative" and "narcissistic" estranged husband.


"By your act, Mr. Kane, four children are deprived of their mother," the judge told Kane as a dozen of Shaikh's friends and relatives looked on. "The circumstances of the homicide were particularly shocking."

Kane's lawyer, Richard Shadley, said the sentence was harsher than usual and that he would meet Kane to discuss a possible appeal.

Police were called to a west-end house of Kane's mother in Lasalle, Que., in late November 2003, where they found a badly injured Tamara Shaikh. The 35-year-old bank employee died in hospital shortly after.

Several days later, Kane was charged with second-degree murder. Kane and Shaikh, who had four children under the age of eight, had recently separated.

In July, Quebec Court Justice Joseph Tarasofsky ruled that evidence presented at the preliminary hearing was strong enough to warrant a trial before judge and jury.

The court date was originally scheduled for the purposes of setting a date for the trial, but Kane entered his admission of guilt when Quebec Superior Court Justice Fraser Martin asked him if he had a plea to enter.

The stabbing occurred after Shaikh arrived at the house to help transport Kane to a drug-treatment centre.

Hilda St-Louis, a friend of Kane's, testified at the preliminary hearing that the former football star was talking about suicide and that when his wife arrived, the discussion between the spouses quickly deteriorated after he became convinced she wanted a divorce.

The Crown said Kane grabbed her by the hair, dragged her into the kitchen, smashed her head against the floor and stabbed her in the neck.

Kane's mother Shirley testified that Kane repeatedly punched Shaikh in the face.

"Tammy was laying down by the fridge," the 75-year-old woman testified earlier this year.

"Tommy was bending down on his knees on top of her and he was just hitting, punching her."

Two psychiatric reports detailing Kane's bout with depression convinced the Crown to downgrade the original charge of second-degree murder.

According to prosecutor Louis Bouthillier, the case turned when a psychiatrist for the Crown and a defence psychiatrist both concluded Kane suffered from depression prior to the stabbing.

Bouthillier also said that drugs were in Kane's system in the days prior to the stabbing – a factor the psychiatrists took into account in their reports.

Growing up, Kane starred in several sports before deciding to attend the University of Syracuse on a football scholarship. He was part of the unbeaten Orangemen team of 1987 and still holds the school record with a career average of 20.7 yards-per-catch.

Drafted in the third round of the NFL draft by the Seattle Seahawks, he caught 142 passes with nine touchdowns for the Seahawks between 1988 and 1992. In 1992 his season ended due to knee and ankle injuries, and Seattle cut him in training camp in 1993.

Kane finished his football career in the CFL, playing five games for the Toronto Argonauts in 1994.

After his professional football career, Kane volunteered his time running football camps for youth at Montreal's Westend Sport Association, the same organization he attended as a young athlete.

He once donated his $70,000 Argonauts salary to the centre.

with files from Canadian Press

CBC Story

Still listening to music!
Topic: Another Entry
Who knew that Tamia remade Love me in a special way. It's always good to listen to music that I have that I haven't listened to before. Totally out of control.

My favorite verse:
Love me now
Cuz I'm special
Not the average kind
Who'd accept any line
That sounds good
So reach into your chain of thoughts
Try to find something new
What worked so well for you before
For me, it just wont do

Playing the shit out of that song.

EY