YO MOMMA

11.Yo mama's is so big that when she bent down the national weather staion issued a tornado
warning then everybody put on gas masks and held on for their lives!

12.Yo mama is so fat when she steps on the weight scale her phone number show up.

13.Yo mama is so fat that when she walks down the street in a yellow dress everyone yells
"stop the bus"

14.Yo mama's armpits are so hairy it looks like she has Don King in a headlock.

15.Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light god told yo mamma to move her fat ass.

16.Yo momma so fat when she wears red she looks like the Kool-Aid Man.

17.Yo momma so fat when she sits around, she sits around.

18.Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light god told yo mamma to move her fat ass.

19.Yo momma so fat when she wears a Malcom X T-Shirt hellicopters try landing on her.

20.Yo momma so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!

21.Yo momma so fat when she bungee jumps she goes straight to hell!

22.Yo momma so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up.

23.Yo momma so fat were in her right now.

24.Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise.

25.Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone

26.Yo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off her.

27.Yo momma so fat she was floating in the ocean and Portugal claimed her for the new world.

28.Yo momma so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions!

29.Yo momma so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

30.Yo momma so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"

31.Yo momma so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller

32.Yo momma so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

33.Yo momma so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!

34.Yo momma so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!

35.Yo momma so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!

36.Yo momma so fat she's on both sides of the family!

37.Yo momma so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!

38.Yo momma so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!

39.Yo momma so fat that when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips!

40.Yo momma so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!

42.Yo momma so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!

43.Yo momma so fat when she back up she beeps.

44.Yo momma so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.

45.Yo momma so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her.

46.Yo momma so fat she stands in two time zones.

47.Yo momma so fat when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed
bumps.

48.Yo momma so fat when she wears a Malcomn X T-shirt, helicopters try to land on her back!

49.Yo momma so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her
back into the ocean.

50.Yo momma so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the
moon, she caused an eclipse.

51.Yo momma so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!

52.Yo momma so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her
as a Chevrolet.

53.Yo momma so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

54.Yo momma so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

55.Yo momma so fat she's got her own area code!

56.Yo momma so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!

57.Yo momma so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...

58.Yo momma so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!

69.Yo momma so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get to her good side!

60.Yo momma so fat she wakes up in sections!

61.Yo momma so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.

62.Yo momma so stupid that she brought a cup to the movie juice.

63.Yo momma so stupid that she sold the car for gas money.

64.Yo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!

65.Yo momma so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home.

66.Yo momma so stupid that under "Education" on her job application, she put "Hooked on
Phonics."

67.Yo momma so stupid She went to disneyworld and saw a sign that said "Disneyworld Left"
so she went home.

68.Yo momma so stupid she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said "guess" so she
said levi's.

69.Yo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes.

70.Yo momma so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home
and got 16 friends.

71.Yo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.

72.Yo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!

73.Yo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!

74.Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!

75.Yo mamma so stupid she ran into a parked car.

76.Yo mamma so stupid she sold her car to buy brand new tires.

77.Yo momma is so stupid she thinks she is smart.

78.Your momma so fat and stupid her waist is bigger than her I.Q.

79.Yo momma so ugly her parents had to tie a porkchop around her neck to get the dog to
play with her.

80.Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

81.Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

82.Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her
father said "Yes, let's go bury it."

83.Yo momma so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.

84.Yo momma so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower.

85.Yo momma so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.

86.Yo momma so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her

87.Yo momma so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play
with her.

88.Yo momma so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Damn, is
it Halloween already?"

89.Yo momma so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.

90.Yo momma so ugly people go as her for Halloween.

91.Yo momma so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have
to kiss her goodbye.

92.Yo mamma so ugly she could make an onion cry.

93.Yo momma is so ugly that when she looks in to the mirror she says what an ugly person.

94.Yo mamma so ugly when she was born the doctor just slapped her parents.

95.Yo momma so old I told her to act her own age, and she died.

96.Yo momma so old she has Jesus' beeper number!

97.Yo momma so old her social security number is 1!

98.Yo momma so old that when God said let the be light, she hit the switch.

99.Yo momma so old that when she was in school there was no history class.

100.Yo momma so old she owes Jesus 3 bucks!

101.Yo momma so old she's in Jesus's yearbook!

102.Yo momma so old her birth certificate says expired on it.

103.Yo momma so old she knew Burger King while he was still a prince.

104.Yo momma so old she was a waitress at the Last Supper.

105.Yo momma so old she ran track with dinosaurs.

106.Yo momma so old she sat behind Jesus in the third grade.

107.Yo momma so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she
was doing, she said "Moving."

108.Yo momma so poor she can't afford to pay attention!

109.Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush!

110.Yo momma so poor when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers!!!

111.Yo momma so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"

112.Yo momma so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.

113.Yo momma so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.

114.Yo momma so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp.

115.Yo momma so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, "What ya doin'?"
She said, "Buying luggage."

116.Yo momma so poor she drives a peanut.

117.Yo momma so poor she waves around a popsicle stick and calls it air conditioning.

118.Yo momma so poor burglars break in her house and leave money

119.Yo momma so poor you go out for sunday pushes of the skateboard

120.Yo momma's underwear is so full of holes that when she farts they whistle.

121.Yo mamma has so much dandruff, the lice have to wear snow boots.

122.Yo momma's underwear is so full of holes that when she farts they whistle.

123.Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was when she was looking down at the scale.

124.Your mamma is so stupid that she looked in a box of Cherios and said, "look, doughnut
seeds."

125.Yo mama's glasses are so thick that when she looks at a map, she can see people waving
at her.

126.Yo mamma is so stupid she thought menopause was a button on the VCR.

127. Yo momma pits are so hairy it looks like she has Don King in an head lock

128. Yo mama is so fat she uses the interstate as a slip-an-side.

129. Yo mama is so fat that when she goes to seaworld they pay HER.

130. Yo mama is so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out.

131. Yo mama is so fat she walked outside and seen a bus and she said "Stop that twinkie!"