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Dumb People

- Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to 
  pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills.

- A man in Johannesberg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the face, seriously
  wounding him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other's head.

- A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety record showed its workers a film
  aimed at encouraging the use of safety goggles on the job. According to Industrial Machinery 
  News, the film's depiction of gory industrial accidents was so graphic that twenty-five
  workers suffered minor injuries in their rush to leave the screening room. Thirteen others
  fainted, and one man required seven stitches after he cut his head falling off a chair while 
  watching the film.

- The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for 
  anyone detonating one within city limits.

- A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis, but by the time police arrived 
  on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash 
  injuries and back pain.

- Swedish business consultant Ulf af Trolle labored 13 years on a book about Swedish economic s
  olutions. He took the 250-page manuscript to be copied, only to have it reduced to 50,000 
  strips of paper in seconds when a worker confused the copier with the shredder.

- A convict broke out of jail in Washington D.C., then a few days later accompanied his 
  girlfriend to her trial for robbery. At lunch, he went out for a sandwich. She needed to see 
  him, and thus had him paged. Police officers recognized his name and arrested him as he
  returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen over the lunch hour.

- Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head
  and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in
  the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't
  telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

- When two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan, refused to hand over the cash to an
  intoxicated robber, the man threatened to call the police. They still refused, so the robber
  called the police and was arrested.

- A Los Angeles man who later said he was "tired of walking," stole a steamroller and led police
  on a 5 mph chase until an officer stepped aboard and brought the vehicle to a stop.