Open Letter From Rikki Lee Travolta

Dear Friends,

We've all seen him: the man on the street corner passionately sermonizing.

He's there every day, rain or shine.

What makes him get up every morning and do that?

That man knows some people may spit on him, or laugh at him, or even physically attack him. But, every day he goes out there anyway. Why?

It's because he believes in something. He stands up for what he believes in.

That's a rare quality these days, to believe in something, to make a moral decision and live by it.

Yet we view that man as strange or odd. Why?

Maybe what makes him "different" isn't that he's a man on a street corner telling strangers what he believes in. Rather, maybe what makes him "different" is simply that he stands - he stands up for what he believes in.

I once knew a girl who lost everything because she didn't stand for anything. She was the girl who couldn't say no.

She was the alcoholic who said she would never drink. Then when temptation appeared - a cocktail offered at a party - she re-rationalized her morals:

• "It's okay to have just one drink at a party" she told herself.

  
  By the next week came:
  

• "It's okay to have a few drinks, as long as it's on the weekend."

  
  

• Soon thereafter it was:
  "It's okay to drink every night as long as it's not at home."

She didn't end up a drunk living on the streets - that's not what it means that she ‘lost everything.' There are many functional alcoholics.

The ‘everything' that she lost was her husband and whatever their future could have been together: children, security, and happiness.

I know that he loved her desperately, but no matter how much he loved her, he could never trust her. It wasn't the drinking, it was the ever-changing morals.

She could re-rationalize any of her morals. When they had married, they vowed to stay faithful to one another. But when temptation came along, she justified her affairs by re-rationalizing her morals:

• "I'm not being unfaithful if we don't go all the way," she told herself.

  
  

• When she then crossed that line, she re-rationalized again:
  "I'm not being unfaithful as long as the other man doesn't mean anything to me."

  
  

• Then when that twice-amended moral again no longer fit, she came up with a third installment:
  "I'm not being unfaithful as long as I don't get caught."

What drove her husband away wasn't a specific act, it wasn't the time he caught her in bed with another man or when she totaled the car while driving drunk. It wasn't the time she spent the down payment for their house on a trip with her friends or the time she left him stranded at the airport because she got invited to a party.

What drove the husband away was the constant unknown. What temptation or peer pressure would she give in to next only to explain it away as somehow not her fault?

The idea of having a moral is that it is what you live by despite either temptations or fears. Morals are what define us.

The man on the street corner may be crazy. He may preach something different than what you or I believe in.

But that man on the street corner doesn't prostitute his morals. He stands up for what he believes in, and he doesn't falter from what he believes in.

There is a John Mellencamp lyric "you've got to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything." I think it's very true. The person who doesn't stand by their own morals is an empty soul.

So many people are afraid to take a moral stand. Instead they latch on to what other people believe in, do the things that other people do, go to the places other people want to go - not because they want to, but because they are told to and they are too insecure to say no. They can't say no - except to responsibility.

What our morals are is up to us as individuals; nobody can tell you that your morals are "right" or "wrong." But whatever they are, you need to be true to them - true to yourself.

If you morally think racism is wrong and you're offered a job with the Klu Klux Klan then don't take the job. Don't prostitute your morals by taking the job and justifying it that even the Klan deserves "a second chance." Why? Because they've pressed their sheets?

I have no sympathy for the Nazis who claimed they were "just following orders." Part of doing what's "right" is standing up to what you think is "wrong" even if it means not following orders. If you think it's wrong, don't do it. If you do it, take responsibility.

Apologies become empty when there is no promise behind them. An apology for cheating on a spouse is a promise that it won't happen again, otherwise it is simply being sorry for getting caught.

Laugh at that man on the street corner if you must. It may hurt his feelings, but it won't stop him from doing what he thinks is "right." Can you make that claim? Truthfully?

Thank you for being my family; for giving meaning to my life. You are what makes me.

Peace Love Trust

rikki lee travolta

Review other RLT commentary

It's All Relative
Stand Against Racism
Writing About Life
Crazy Pants Travolta
Gregory Hines
Everwood
Book Excerpt: Bus Fare
Learning to Stand
A Time of War
Country Charm
Talking Frankly About Family (& Christmas)
My Fractured Life
Forever Love
Good and Evil
Man Behind the Wheel
The Little Engine that Could: A Memorial
Perceptions of Perfection
Personal Decisions
Responsibility in Communication
You Done Good
Duality of Man
Evolution of a Hero
Reason to Quit - Stop Smoking
Beware of Stalkers
Dare to Dream
Do The Right Thing
Dealing with Abuse
Mother's Day
Right to Choose
Support the Cause
Just Try
Virtue of One
Martin Luther King Jr
Free Form Jazz
Creating the News
Great Expectations
Story of a Life
Acting 101
Why I Cried
Personal Values vs. Monetary Value
Broken Hearts
Dignity over Jealousy
Community Responsibility
Life, Honesty, and Integrity
Drug Withdrawal
Christmas Spirit
Rikki Lee Travolta's debut album!

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