And the winner for best picture is...Hooters on Scooters.

Here are some more awards that I managed to scrounge up. My knees are getting sore. From begging! Get your mind out of the gutter.


You're turn to buy!

Click on the award to visit "The Alternate Give Away Awards."

I gave this one to myself. Frankly, I deserve I think it. Hic! This site has a plethora of useless awards to grant yourself. Hell, I spent a lot of time on my page, and when you have multiple personalities, who's to say one of us can't treat the rest for the effort?


Don't get caught in the web, you'll be stuck here!

Click on the award to visit "Rycha's Lair."

Rycha liked my page. She also likes Queensryche, so maybe I should be offended. Ya think? Rycha is also her cat's name. One of them must be an imposter. Rycha also has a thing for vampires, so maybe the cat is just one incarnation of Rycha. Or maybe she's just plain loopy! Go find out more about this mystery woman. Now!


Follow the yellow brick url. wasn't yellow before Toto came along...

Click on the award to visit Monika's (OzWitch's) "The Witch's Lair."

(Site no longer exists.)

What's with the lairs lately? Is there some grand conspiracy out there, with women lying in wait to entrap us all? Or is my paranoia in overdrive again? OzWitch has created a great site. Very mystical. Very creative. Very entertaining. Except I was hounded by yet another cat! There definitely must be a conspiracy. Go visit. You'll be enchanted. Probably cursed, like me...but people curse me all the time anyway. It's no big deal.


Say 'cheese.' cracked the lens again!

Click on the award to visit "Elvis' Wonderful World of Cheez."

Those of you expecting cheesecake, go take a cold shower! Isn't there enough of that on the net? Apparently not. Elvis has put together a great site glorifying all things cheesy, and she's brought back memories of too many guilty pleasures! I enjoyed my least until that giant mousetrap clamped down on my ass. Ouch!


Planning on running away with the circus, you freak?

Click on the award to visit Antoinette's "Amira Studios."

Any art afficiondos here? I didn't think so. No refined person would hang around my site for too long. Antoinette has a terrific site. She's a very talented artist and designer. See for yourself. This is my first award from the continent of Africa. Odds are it will be my last. You think? I get the feeling this award is saying something about me. Hmmm...


You can check in, but you can never leave.

Click on the award to visit Matt's "Mental Hospital"

I'm proud to be the inaugural winner of this award, an honour Matt bestowed upon me probably because there's a shortage of us true loonies on-line. He also won my award because he just isn't circuited right and I think he'd go as far as to become a Jehovah's witness if I didn't give it to him just to stuff my mailbox full of Watchtower magazines every day. And he's almost as evil as them. His site is a gas and he frequently updates, so you'll never know who his next target will be. I recommend visiting his page. You won't be disappointed.


Yes, it really says, 'TEE HEE HEE.

Click on the award to visit "Diane's Planet"

(Site no longer exists.)

Who do you have to talk to to get a whole planet named after you anyway? I want to get in on that deal. I'd probably have to settle for an "ass"teroid. Diane is certainly "out there" anyway. Check out her weirdest dream and her most embarrassing moment and you'll begin to understand why. She put a lot of work into her site and it shows. It was a pleasure to read, has interesting and useful links-so go there. Yesterday! Take a left at Uranus.


Quit clowning around and click your damn mouse already!

Click on the award to visit "Chri$ Lewi$' Web$ite"

Nothing associated with me as ever been called cool ass before. I've heard stupid ass, dumb ass and, of course, smart my self esteem is rising a bit now that Chris has bestowed his award upon my site. He has a pretty cool ass site himself that you should check out. Be careful though..I'd swear one of the gifs tried to pee on me. That brought back a few unpleasant childhood memories, but it didn't stop me from enjoying his page.


Even I didn't think I could kill Kenny with a cheesy puff!

Click on the award to visit Karen's "Collecting South Park" website

After spending hours mesmerized by the scrolling images of South Park collectibles (I think I'm hypnotized, and why does my voice suddenly sound like Kyle's?), I ventured deeper into Karen's site. Boy, she's crazy! She collects South Park memorabilia-need I say more? But who among us doesn't collect something? And the more you think about it...why not South Park? At least she's not a Beanie Baby freak! (No offense meant to Beanie Baby freaks!) She has gathered a very impressive collection indeed. Check it out if you're a fan. If you're not, what the f***'s wrong with you? Great site. Very well designed. And Cartman's handing out Cheesy Poofs! Karen was kind enough to give me this award (and wouldn't take it back).


The extra 'L' came free of charge.

Click on the award to visit "Christine Hurley, Clairvoyant-Medium"

(Site no longer exists. I wonder if she foresaw its demise.)

Christine is not a small. She's not a large. She's a medium. Spirits communicate through her. Through me too, but those spirits are of the alcoholic variety. If she truly has psychic ability, you'd think she would have been warned of what a waste of bandwidth my page was. But she wasn't, and she left behind this award for me. I may jest, but Christine has put together a quality and informative site that is worth a visit. And if you believe the testimonials, she may just be working with more than smoke and mirrors.


Canadian Web Awards!

I received the "good" award from the Canadian Web Awards. Not their "excellent" award. Not even their "very good" award. They don't have a "not so good" or a "bad" award. "Good" is the low end of the totem poll. So if I was awarded the "good" award, how come I feel like I lost? Check out the site. Apparently there's links to some excellent sites. And some links to some very good sites as well. Or if you prefer slumming, there's links to sites the quality of this one as well.


Vroom! Vroom!

Click on the award to visit "NASCAR Nexel Online"

I just knew wearing a crash helmet would pay off for me some day. Charliann from NASCAR Nextel Online loved my site and this is her way of giving me the checkered flag for insanity. Their site also won my award, so start your engines and check it out.

Click here to see Kooky Kaptions. The naked picture of you here is funny without a caption.

We all know e-mail can be a pain. I have a solution if you just don't have the time. You've heard of prefabricated housing, but now there's RICK'S PREFABRICATED E-MAIL.

Click here and have me write your e-mail for you!

I've created a page on which to unleash crazy things that pop into my head. I call it Psycho Babbling. I plan to add to it over time as future madness strikes. So please click on the link below.

Psycho Babbling

I've come up with my very own get rich scheme. Doesn't everyone have one? Buying lottery tickets just isn't panning out. So please click on the link below.

Click here to see my plea to stupid people

I came up my own tv spoilers for unaired episodes (episodes that should have been). Click on the link to see something I like to call TV MISGUIDED

Regis and Kelly agreed to interview me, asking an assortment of questions pulled from those pesky e-mail surveys that you're probably familiar with.

Click here to see a transcript of my appearance on Live With Regis and Kelly

I'm a sports fan and I've created a page where I have some fun with the names of athletes, and poked fun at some athletes themselves. I don't think you have to even like sports to get enjoyment out of the results.

Click here to see me Goofing On Sports

Stop staring, mesmorized. Click the damn thing already!


Entering the gates of hell must be preferable to this!Click on the door to go to "Rick's Padded Cell" (about me page)


Scatter-brained Thoughts


Click here to win my award


Click here to see who has won my award


Click here to go to my banners page


Click here to play some games


Click here to go to my links page


View all current and past guestbook entries in one place (minus the broken links and images!) by clicking on the image directly above.

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The song you would be hearing if I didn't remove my midi files is "Crazy Little Thing Called Love." If it's so crazy, you'd think I'd be a prime candidate for it. Think again!