Spirit Shaman

With the first gentle touch of Spirit, I experienced a kind of hesitation...
a pause... Here, finally, was Truth. And Truth, spoken heart-to-heart and
Light-to-Light, knew me... in a way no one else had or could... in a way in
which I didn't even know me. So, there was a breath of fear, escaping the
cave of my ego, brushing across my awareness... With whom could I ever share
this? What brief encounter with insanity would they see this as? From what
issues and depths did my own fear clutch at me? All I knew for certain was
that this was Truth, this was my Path, and I would follow it as persistently
and honestly as I could from that moment on.
Such hesitation, such resistance, has lingered on the edges of my Self, as I
traveled realms and dimensions, unlimited by thought or imagination. I am
accepted by sentient Life as I am - hesitation and all - patiently accepting
my companionship, much deeper than I accept myself. Such hesitation comes
from "hedging my bets", so to speak... careful to hold one card up my sleeve
one pocket of safety, even though all those I meet Inworld are well aware
of this. No one laughs, chastises, or tries to teach. They all know I know.
They all know I choose. They all accept me just the way I am, and do not
live in expectation. I'm the one with the issue. And I am dealing with it,
as well and as fast as I can.
I hold such resistance in my breath physically, in my passion emotionally,
and in my ego psychologically. And it has been so since the day I was born..
my resistance has left its footprints in my inner labyrinth. As I walk to
the center of my spiritual labyrinth - the core of my Uniquity, I pause to
examine the resistance enthroned there.
First, I hear the silent scream, frozen in time and place, by intolerable
pain. Then, I see liquid color-energy flowing and weaving a cocoon about
something/ someone. I pause to smell and taste the environment here...
definitely human, human fear, human fear-released energy and material. I
know the child within the cocoon: barely conscious, barely alive... naked,
vacant, disintegrated... and yet, her Light still faintly glows... stubborn,
stubborn girl... I walk through the non-consuming fire of the cocoon and
draw her into my arms. I wrap a soft, blue Light blanket about her and walk
back out the cocoon. The fire reframes itself into a small warming circle on
the ground. A small breeze transforms itself from the scream, and fills the
air with springtime freshness and new life. I draw up a rocking chair,
singing lullabyes to the child of my heart; first night's sleep in fifty
years. Tomorrow is soon enough to walk back out the Labyrinth.

Celtic Circle Crossing
Higher Ground
23rd Psalm, revised
Creation Story
Whispers at Advent
Spirit Guides
Ley-ity: Deep Earth Wisdom
Changes in me: Early 2004
The Message of Oneness
Lenten Meditations
Musings of a Welsh Shepherdess
The Judas Conspiracy: Curiosities
Revelations: revisionist thought
Easter Revelation!
A Pause in the Breath of Creation
The King James Bible