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What is your definition of LOVE?

Scrooge on 9.12.99
Left Over Vegetables Everywhere

solana on 9.12.99
This is a tough one to answer. I love my children wholeheartedly and unconditionally. I love my husband because he is and has been a paat of my life for so long. I love my sister, and father and so on because they are all part of my family and part of what makes me who I am..I love my friends because they are family, too.. and they choose to be part of my life. I love my cats and I loved my dog..
and every one of these is a different kind of love. I think that love is defined by the being that you love. Even the love I haave for my children is defined differently in some ways.
One thing that I think is universal about love.. we all need as much of it as we can get... and the best way to get it is to give it!

heyteach on 9.12.99
I think love is more than an emotion, it is an attitude, a commitment. I think we can decide to love someone or some principle. It means that no matter what the cost, that person or principle gets what is best for it. Sometimes that means a swift kick in the kiester, or fighting to defend it.
True love would have to be unconditional, but that does not mean there are no consequences if the love object is out of line.
If there are conditions, it's not really love--it may have been affection or lust or habit--but not love.
Love heals, gives strength, and endures beyond death.

Rage on 9.14.99
My wife answered a similiar question a while back and I don't think I have ever seen a better answer anywhere. It is her answer, but I have adopted it - so now it is my definition as well. Here it is:

St. Augustine once said "If you think you understand... it isn't God." The same is true of love.
This sounds trite and like a cop out -- but it really isn't.
I don't think anyone can encompass the scope and the enormity of love with a few words.
The beauty of love lies in its mystery. If you pull apart a flower, petal by petal - you might be able to see how the parts fit together, you might be able to see what each part is for. You might even be able to break it down into some sort of biochemical formula. But once dissected, it no longer has the same effect that it did whole. Instead of a beautiful flower, you have a chopped up piece of greenery.
So you can search for your definition of love. Maybe you will get one that appeals to you. One that you can sit back and say "AHH! SO THAT IS LOVE!" But by taking the whole apart in order to satisfy this need to pin it down like a butterfly to a piece of tackboard, you will have stolen away much of it's magic and you know what?

If you think you understand, it probably isn't love anyway.

ajandpj on 9.14.99 8:32 PM
I recently told a good friend who was trying to decide if he should get back together with his ex--"If you care more about her happiness than your own, if the thought of living one minute without her in your life is far worse than the bad memories you may have, then you should be together--if she feels the same" From my own experience, my husband and I have been together for 9 years. We just got married this june. In 95 I was unfaithful, in 96 he was unfaithful. We tried being apart but the pain of what we had done to each other did not compare to the pain of not being together. After a year of fighting and crying and accusations we finally accepted the reality-what happened, happened and because we both know how the other feels we know it wo'nt happen again, and we knew that the few months shattered could not compare to the years of memories we had created. We both woke up, grew up and decided we were stuck with each other and that made us very happy. We got engaged in 98 and married in 99. After the bad times, our relationship feels stronger to me than it ever did. We are both human and we both know how it feels to be apart, and we will always be together. If you can learn from the past, grow together, be willing to be wrong. laugh at the stupid little things. There is nothing in the world worth more than the love of a soul-mate. NOTHING!

thomasgx on 9.15.99
I am very aware of the consequences of using the word LoVe. I now understand it should not be taken or used lightly because it does clearly mean different things to different people! I'm now at the point in a relationship where I say "I LoVe you" to my girlfriend, but only after a long discussion. I don't think she is/will be the one i spend the rest of my life with so to speak so i don't feel i'm completely in loVe but i do feel a little in loVe- I'll try to explain!
My definition of LoVe is the strongest I've ever felt about someone, for instance the person i'm with now is the person I've liked most ever so I freely say to her I' love you... with the understanding that she is aware of what I mean entirely. LoVe being used between us to comunicate a stronger feeling than any other word could illustrate because it needs a special word for a special feeling.
I hope if anything I've been original in my thinking if not a little wierd! or unorthadox.

Babytisa on 9.16.99
My definition of love as it pertains to "any" kind of love.

To Love and Be Loved
by Babytisa

Love is opening up your heart
allowing the warmth to flow.
Appreciating others for who they are
to respect and allow them to grow.

Showing tenderness and devotion
completely trusting without a doubt.
Cherishing and treasuring "their" love
accepting imperfections inside and out.

Pahel50 on 9.18.99
Love is so many things -- for a child or spouse it's caring more about them than you do yourself. I would willingly give up everything I have for my kids and husband. Loving is making sacrifices -- your career, your time, your energy, stuff. Whatever is necessary so that they have what they need.
Love for a grandchild is different than love for your kids. I can't explain it, I just know how I feel. There are times my heart is so full of joy, I think it will burst, more so than I felt with my kids.
With my siblings, there's a connection. We care so much about each other even though we're thousands of miles apart. My husband is my best friend, my sister is a close second. Siblings understand each other and know where you're coming from.
Parents -- I loved both my parents, but it wasn't the same. My mother was very stand-offish; consequently, I responded in the same way. She hugged me once about 10 years ago and I actually cringed. She loved me too, in her own way, but she was never affectionate. It took me a long time to learn it's okay to hug your kids.

Love among friends, ah -- people you get to pick to love. Common bonds -- kids, hobbies, coworkers, neighbors. Interests that draw you together and you find you like each other; over the years you realize that it's more than like.

Love is caring, sharing, sacrificing, standing up for each other, patience, kindness, slow to anger, forgiveness.

bodytalk on 9.18.99
I have been asked this many times and this is the best I can do...

To love very much is to love inadequately;
we love--that is all
Love cannot be modified
without being nullified.
Love is a short word,
but it contains everything.
Love means
the body, the soul, the life,
the entire being.
We feel love
as we feel the warmth of our blood,
we breath love
as we breath the air,
we hold it in ourselves
as we hold in our thoughts.
Nothing more exists for us.
Love is not a word;
it is a wordless state
indicated by four letters.

When it is time;
the right time,
Love will find you!

angelbee on 9.27.99
Love to me is unconditional, giving of one self. taking the time to do the little things in life that matter . Like cook a good meal for your family. Be ther when they need a hug. understanding when they are not perfet.
Love is setting boundaries for your children and teaching them right from wrong.Love is staying when things get tuff. Love is a simple pat on the back or a understand hug. Love is forgivness.
LOve is getting up with the kids and getting them off to school . A cup of hot chocolate on a cold day. Love is something you give and expect nothing in return. Love to me is family. I love my family very,very much

beijk on 9.27.99
Love to me is a mystery. And I like it that way. It is a felt sense: "God in your body" is the sensation of love. The smile of a child does trigger to feel it. Or a cat loooking at you blameless and with no guilt.
Love you...

brigit on 9.29.99
the Divine within recognizes, calls out to, and is willing to unite with the Divine within another;one has the beginning of an understanding that no human, indeed nothing living, is truly separate from another; and one truly believes that the loved one is the better for being loved.

gwen on 9.30.99
what is love? love is droping your hopes and dreams because somebody you love needs your shoulder to cry on. love is spending an obscene amount of money to give somebody something they've always wanted but could never afford, even if you can't afford it either. love is staying home with your mom cause you happened to see her crying when you have two tickets for that concert you wanted to go to your whole life and the guy you have a hopeless crush for has agreed to go with you. love is telling your mom you didn't get the tickets after all. love is stepping in front of a truck to save a child who stopped cold in the street. love is taking in a dirty, old mutt full of flees. i could go on forever. to make it short - love is giving.... giving all the time without expecting anything in return.... giving without letting the other person know that you're giving, sometimes. giving even if the other person doesn't appreciate, understand or even notice it.

MT1 on 10.1.99

anyman on 10.4.99
Love is giving without expecting something in return.
Love is remaining faithful after the emotion fades.
Love is committment to another when they're good or not good.
Love is sacrificing self in the interest of another or others.
Love is hanging in there when circumstances become difficult
Love is ignoring the faults of a person who won't or can't change
And love is exemplified by this: while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

connecta on 10.5.99
Sometimes it is difficult to know how to be loving. It is early Tuesday morning, my wife still asleep. I just poured a cup of coffee and noticed something in the sink under a few dirty dishes. It was moving, a beautiful big brown spider. I don't know if it is a dangerous one or not, probably not. It was trying to get out of the sink, but slipped and fell sort of one step forward two steps backward style. I wonder if anyone else rationalizes as much as I do. All kinds of excuses for doing something, doing nothing. I still haven't decided what to do. I will take care of the situation, do the dishes before my wife gets up. The spider is going to be dead from all the toxins sprayed by the exterminator every month. I am probably going to do something before that happens. I don't want my wife to get bitten, and I don't want the spider to suffer. Do spiders suffer? They sure don't want to go down the tubes, do they? All this has to do with what I think love is, that for myself, for the other important people in my life, and for the rest of life on this planet. Erich Fromm said that love is an activity grounded in caring, respect, responsibility and knowledge of oneself, others, and the world. He said it is hard to do in our day and time because we are alienated, separated from ourselves and the rest of the world. I think we need to integrate ourselves into becoming enspirited motivated beings, inspired to take care of ourselves and to participate actively in what we discover life to be. Time to check on that spider and do the dishes. This is difficult.

vgreen on 10.12.99
There is all-consuming "romantic love", which by it's very nature, being of fire, a huge passion and utter insanity cannot last, but really does burn very bright for a brief spell.

Then there is the "love" that has been trivialised by media and commercialism. A love born out of the works of the great poets and writers, which did truly mean that one would lay down their life for another.

It is a shame that a word which describes such a thing and with such a past behind it, could be used so easily by so many.

auburn23 on 10.21.99
love has many meanings to me. my love for my children is very different than my love for my spouse or my friends. love for ones children is a giving, all or nothing love. i dont think love for others is that. and i dont think it should be. so many times in relationships we confuse love with compromise and change and other things that really have no business in love. to love and be loved changing should not be a prerequisit. we should love as people are. i dont believe loving another adult is able to be unconditional like our love for our children. if you think about it our love for others is very conditional, and how they act, how they feel about us, what they do. many things. i believe love is many things but it is not whitling away at yourself for another. that is not love. and so many times people think it is. real love should be a lifting experience but often times it is not. it is a emotion that is never enough. sometimes we think that love is so good but sometimes it can be a drain on us too. sometimes the people that we truly love want more of us than we are able to give. it is not that we dont love them just that their definition of love and our definition of love might not be exactly the same. i think love is a wonderful thing, dont get me wrong, i am loved by many and i love many. sometimes tho it is a burdon not a blessing.

Birdy on 10.23.99
a four letter word, a feeling that makes your heart ache, the thought of someone making you smile, living for something. Most importantly something to live for, Love is a reason to live, yup I think thats the best defintion I can come up with, something to live for...

mercury on 10.23.99
love to me cannot be explained. but i am going to try to is something special. people say you can't live with out it;nor live without it. love is always misunderstood. when you love someone you are willing to die for that person, sacrifies everything you have and worked for, for that person. you want to bewith that person everyday of your life and have absolutly no regrets that you are with that is also friendship. if that person you say you love, you do not consider a best friend and know you can stay in a room totally naked with no shame....then you love that is not alwasy about sex nor is it about hurt and saddness. love is happiness and friendship. and with that comes sex and children.and if you do not think of the person you are in a relationship that way, then it all a lie.

cyndy10 on 10.23.99
Love is the care and concern for the well being of another human being. Love is also missing someone while you are asleep.

John125 on 10.24.99
Love is what keeps us alive. It's always there to remind us why we do the things we do, so we have the strength to continue. It makes you feel lucky and thankful. It is the center of our entire existence. It makes us cry, laugh, smile, and give as well as receive. It's why we are here.

sehdeval on 10.27.99
Shortest answer I can come up with is 'souls conversing'. If you find someone whom you would be willing to change the most core part of yourself for, and who you would not be afraid to change at their deepest levels, then that means the relationship which you are in is something really palpable. This is a sign of trust; not just in yourself, or the other person, but the relationship itself, to take you places that you both want to go. Mutually and absolutely.

p.s. check out connecta's answer if you haven't, it is less trite sounding than the rest

coolcat7 on 10.29.99
It is something that is between two people, and two people alone. It is something to be treasured when found, and something to handle with gentle hands. It is something to hold on to, and it is something that never fades away if it is true. I believe it is a commitment--body, soul, heart, and mind---between two. It is devotion; it is patience; it is incredible; it is rare. But it is still out there.

digihero on 10.31.99
humans need certain emotional components to become healthy.

there are many forms of love that humans require in order to be healthy.

they need a "mother" figure, a "father" figure, etc.

that is why often, when a child with a single parent finds another figure in their life to substitute for the other parent.

i think love is an emotional bind between two lifeforms. two lifeforms must be able to see eye-to-eye, and heart-to-heart.

love is a belief, a faith if you will.

love is the absense of flaw to your eyes even if it exists to others.

love is devotion and commitment.

artists love their work. they devote their lives to it.
freud loved the human mind.

love is required to thrive, to "peak".

love is essential in the quest to "self-actualization" (maslow)

jlm4012 on 10.31.99
A shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold in the dark, sweet kisses, sweeter hugs, someone to listen, someone to hear, to know comfort, to give comfort, to be secure in the knowledge that you are wanted.

Denise62 on 10.31.99
Love is the Best Gift.
Love is patient, and love is kind.
Love is not jealous, it does not boast, and it is not proud.
Love is not rude, love is not selfish, and love does not become angry easily.
Love does not remember wrongs done against it.
Love is not happy with evil, but love is happy with the truth.
Love patiently accepts all things.
Love always trusts, always hopes, and always continues strong.
Love never ends.
I Corinthians 13: 4-8

I love myself.
I love my husband.
I love my precious sweet little son.
I love my enemies.
I love my friends.
I love my parents.
I love GOD.
I love my home.
I love my car.
I love my computer.
I love a lot of stuff bears.
I love smiling. :-)

Ethmer on 11.3.99

IX Love

i Source of love

1) Love derives from the personality and experience of the entity.

2) Love is the entity’s response to its highest values.

3) Love is often developed between entities because of previous relationships in past incarnations.

ii Types of love

1) Entities develop different strengths or types of love.

2) Love can be in relation to another entity or to concepts, sights, sounds or experiences.

3) Strengths of love can range from simple fondness for to exquisite ecstasy.

iii Expressions of love

1) The method of expression of love varies according to its strength and the circumstances surrounding its expression.

2) An entity may also express its love through self-sacrifice.

3) The expression of love does not require reciprocity.


Love makes the world go ‘round,
Thoughts of love keep the mind sound;
Acts of love keep the heart strong,
Receipt of love gives to life its song.


And God said (to Its Self):

“Let there Be Light!”

And We Became!

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