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FORUM ARCHIVE: The All New 11 O'Clock Show - Posted Mon Oct 2 23:28:40 BST 2000

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The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted Mon Oct 2 23:28:40 BST 2000
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The All New 11 O'Clock Show Posted Mon Oct 2 23:28:40 BST 2000 by 'Enter a proper name you fool '

I thought I'd start this thread now, 24 hours before the event, in order to allow more time for slagging.

The countdown starts here....

Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By Justin on Mon Oct 2 23:36:30 BST 2000:

Thing is, I've got to watch it now.

Isn't there a repeat of How Do You Want Me? on at the same time anyway? I've been enjoying them more and more.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Tue Oct 3 11:06:39 BST 2000:

Interestingly, Daisy Donovan left presenting to be a comedy actress, while Sarah Alexander left comedy acting to be a presenter. So there.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Manto' on Tue Oct 3 21:39:09 BST 2000:

Seen on C4s Reach4 Forum



the 11 O'Clock Show
posted by Stick Boy on 20:48 3/10/2000

I've just watched the tonights show being recorded and i've rushed to my broad band mega mobile laptop to warn you all not to watch it. I've never liked shows where they use canned laughter to cover up for the weakness of the writers. But on this show they'll need a truck load. No wonder Ian Leigh pulled out. Anyway you've been warned, if you watch it now it's your fault.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Chloe' on Tue Oct 3 22:12:17 BST 2000:

So, who have they got writing this series then?

Didn't Stewart Lee used to be the script editor? Has he now made the right decision to jump ship?
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Mavrik' on Tue Oct 3 23:13:29 BST 2000:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH PLEASE MUMMY MAAAAKE IT STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Mavrik' on Tue Oct 3 23:14:18 BST 2000:

They can't even read the frigging autocue!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By george on Tue Oct 3 23:16:58 BST 2000:

New presenters, same old pile of shite.

(Looks at watch) isn't it time for the Weather on ITV?
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Mavrik' on Tue Oct 3 23:16:58 BST 2000:

The blonde one goes cross eyed when she reads the autocue! And, that 'Davros' thing is obviously a recycled gag, the phone number is about 6 months out of date!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'James' on Tue Oct 3 23:26:57 BST 2000:

Some days ago on this forum I made a basic error by burbling something along the lines of:

"New presenter. New other presenter. New format. New writers (etc...) Could it be that we are not, at last, dealing with the Same Old Original Axe?"

I was wrong. Once a Cock Show, always a Cock Show. It's the format. It's the format. IT'S THE FORMAT.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Tue Oct 3 23:31:28 BST 2000:

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, IT'S WRONG!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Mavrik' on Tue Oct 3 23:32:08 BST 2000:

I really thought it couldn't get any worse than the Lee/Donovan days. I was wrong. That silly blonde bitch looks like she's on drugs, the bloke is obviously the guy who cleans the bogs at the studios, and.....OHHHHHHHHHH I CAAAAAAN'T TAKE IT ANYMOOOOOOOOOOOORE


*shoots self*
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By Justin on Tue Oct 3 23:34:03 BST 2000:

We've switched over during the ad break. It is *still* fucking rubbish, and when you consider the opening item consisted of gags that they could have written all goddamned summer, it just makes you astonished. Princess Di jokes - good for you, the writing staff.

Sarah Alexander had an amusing cameo in People Like Us (estate agent). Absolutely no idea about Jon Holmes. Anyway, it doesn't work, although I guess he did step in with just a week to go.

Anyway, the writing. No such excuses. It is *already* desperate. And they're going to have to keep this up three times a week until...when?...Christmas?!!

I've said it before...but here we go:

YOU CAN'T DO A THRICE-WEEKLY TOPICAL COMEDY SHOW FOR WEEKS ON END IF YOU HAVE A TEAM OF PEOPLE WHO ARE NO FUCKING GOOD.

Not constructive, I grant you. Not insightful either. But why should I be? *They're* not.

Carry on, the rest of you. I've washed my hands of it, forever.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Peter O' on Tue Oct 3 23:34:52 BST 2000:

It's not necessarily the format that's to blame. It's just a succession of shitters dribbling their wet smelly mess into some cameras. This is probably worse than what I saw of the last series. It's got that "road accident" feel. You have to watch, to see the body mess crawling around and screaming in its infinite sadness. Topical jokes punching me in the head until my very ability to laugh has been rotted down to a grey skeleton.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'James' on Tue Oct 3 23:35:27 BST 2000:

Hey, Sean Meo's just done a joke I remember being in 'Oink!' about fourteen years ago.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Chloe' on Tue Oct 3 23:37:57 BST 2000:

What a shame - ended so soon? NOT! Another two more this week, and three every week - someone at C4's having a flipping laugh.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Peter O' on Tue Oct 3 23:38:45 BST 2000:

And by the way if that bird thinks she can get in my good books simply by pouting and thrusting her breasts in my face while slowly removing her clothes then we'll just have to see about that. I'm willing to put her to the test. I doubt if she's got what it takes.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Mark J' on Tue Oct 3 23:39:54 BST 2000:

And as for the pre-recorded items... oh dear.

Ricky Grover seemed to be doing an audition for the next Guy Richie film. The Style Wankers wanted to be Chris Morris so bad, it wasn't funny. It really wasn't. And I thought they might have tried to go a whole show without using the word 'wank'.

At least How Do You Want Me is on now. Followed by Seinfeld. Aaaaah...
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'James' on Tue Oct 3 23:43:40 BST 2000:

Most of that crowd can write, either convincingly or at least tolerably. And Holmes and Alexander both know how to perform, in the situations they've just come from. They don't know how to do *that* though. The Corpses suggested some time ago that "that" may not even, in principle, be do-able. Case pretty much proved, I think.

The scheduling for "How Do You Want Me?" suddenly makes sense.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'zaber' on Tue Oct 3 23:47:22 BST 2000:

Complete shit from beginning to end. Sarah Alexander's timing was terrible, and the other nobody was so insignificant, he may as well go home during the ad break. As for the Style Wankers, I've always thought there could be good material in ripping the piss out of Slave, etc. but sadly, they didn't find any.

And the worst thing about the entire 30 mins is that they *knew* it was shit, but carried on as if it really was quite witty and clever.

I wish upon everyone associated with the program a painful dose of piles.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By Justin on Tue Oct 3 23:51:24 BST 2000:

Go to the Channel 4 website, if you fancy something to do. There are people actually saying that "The 11ocs has lost its edge". And "bring back Daisy and Iain".

Wow.

James - I know I sounded like I was being hard on the writers. There were at least 25 of 'em on tonight's show. And not a single joke worthy of the name. Interestingly, the credits are now flashed up so quickly that we don't get the chance to see who actually wrote the thing - I got as far as Debbie Barham and then the next credit came up. You can imagine all the writers later on in the alphabet telling their weary relatives, "Freeze it! Freeze the video there! Can you see my name there? Yes! *I* wrote this piece of shit!!!"
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By george on Tue Oct 3 23:53:37 BST 2000:

The most I've sat through previously is about five minutes, so with all the pre-series talk, I forced myself through a whole edition.

Never again. It's the feeling of just when you think things don't get any worse.......

...and I wouldn't advise complaining to C4 either for the following reasons:
1.Criticism gets deleted from the forum, if it actually gets noticed although 2.If it does you get a totally brain-dead reply from the Eds, and sending an email to R2R won't work because 3.They use it as programme material which means that 4.the 11oCS gets more publicity!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Manto' on Tue Oct 3 23:56:18 BST 2000:

What Suiii said: (wheres she gone anyway?)

Subject: Re: Our Toon [ Previous Message ]
Posted By Suiii on Sun Oct 1 01:03:16 BST 2000:
Spot on George. Ever tried posting on Reach4 or R2R? It either gets lost amongst the hordes of illiterate (but justifiably angry) Angel and WWF fans, or deleted immediately. When C4VE or C4ED occasionally get round to answering a query, it's usually with the wrong information. I remember, about 2 days before the start of the latest run of South Park, someone posted asking when the series was due to start, and got a reply saying "We do not have any plans to show this in the near future". It's the same thing with 'Oz'. Depending on who replies, the answer is either "We've got the rights", "We're in the process of getting the rights" or "Sorry, I'm just the work experience lad".

And they did make an absolute arsejob of 'The Idiots' didn't they. "Sorry we pixellated the nudity, but if you go to our website, there's a picture of an unpixellated cock for you to look at" C4 are hopelessly lost in a constantly changing world. Having rested on their laurels for so many years, it's as if they went into a coma in 1989, they need to be kicked up the backside for their own sake. Unfortunately Big Brother was a success, so they probably think everything is alright now. It really is coming to something when 7 million people would rather tune into the Beebs Olympic coverage than watch anything C4 has to offer.
As recently as 3 years ago they did some fantastic seasons like 'Queer Street' and 'After Dark' (?) with new films, decent documentaries etc., and now what? All Back to Mine, well whoop-de-doo, the highlight of my week! I realised, with great sadness, the other day, that Sky One have a better selection of programmes than C4. It's time to start wearing black again I think. I'll write to Sir Elton and ask him to write a song for the funeral.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Nev Fountain' on Tue Oct 3 23:57:24 BST 2000:

You're all so damn attractive when you're angry...
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'James' on Wed Oct 4 00:11:41 BST 2000:

Justin> James - I know I sounded like I was being hard on the writers. There were at least 25 of 'em on tonight's show. And not a single joke worthy of the name.

True enough. I think I'm in fairly close agreement with you here... I don't see how *anybody* could have produced decent material for that show. A stream of disconnected one-liner 'jokes' is not particularly funny. Unless they are very funny one-liners. A stream of "topical" one-liners is unlikely ever to reach that exalted plateau.

A lot of that material would have been perfectly permissible as 'Week Ending' filler stuff (even during one of the up periods). In the 11OCS environment it fails. Firstly because 'Week Ending' was something you had on in the background while you were making chips; secondly because on the 11OCS it has (apparently by law) to be read out by two peculiar, stilted talking heads who look as if they want rather desperately to be somewhere else. (This particular duo can be forgiven for seeming somewhat under-rehearsed. It should be remembered however that Daisy Donovan managed to maintain a state of permanent under-rehearsal through three consecutive series).

But think of all the telly-watching time we've saved!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Jeanette' on Wed Oct 4 00:21:54 BST 2000:

'zaber'"...I wish upon everyone associated with the program a painful dose of piles. "
- That'll be the only way they'll get a standing ovation with this series!



Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Cwej' on Wed Oct 4 01:14:20 BST 2000:

Only caught the last few bits ... random thoughts - SA looking at wrong cameras but then DD did all the time , maybe this is production incompetance or sabotage ? I'm giving a little benefit of the doubt < or donut > tot eh presenters cos they're borth new at this and there's obviously shit behind the scenes .... MY GOD , ' Schnapps from ITV's Ice Warriors ' - thats SOOOOOO topical .... how do they do it ? . Gay Gary Bushell , good plan , nice shooting , execution a little off .

maybe if they played up the canned laughter and played the show as BLATANT shit < even more extreme than now ? is it possible ? > some amusement might possibly arise ? Am i too optimistic ?

i want lee and herring back *sob*
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Wed Oct 4 01:38:51 BST 2000:

>I've just watched the tonights show being recorded and i've rushed to my broad band mega mobile laptop to warn you all not to watch it. I've never liked shows where they use canned laughter to cover up for the weakness of the writers. But on this show they'll need a truck load. No wonder Ian Leigh pulled out. Anyway you've been warned, if you watch it now it's your fault.
>
There is no canned laughter on the 11OCS. If there's a laugh on the soundtrack it came from you and the rest of the audience.

Neither SA or JH are trying to jump ship/do down the material/whatever. Everyone on this show is very happy with what went out on Channel 4 tonight, including the presenters, producers, Talkback and Channel 4. There are twenty writers on this show, all of whom have worked on a variety of shows, many of which you like. Why should their judgement be so impaired as to provide you with a half hour bucket of shit? There's no point arguing with you. We should never have even entertained the slightest hope that you should appreciate the attempts that have been made by the team behind this show to make it funnier, more intelligent, more interesting and essentially have more point than any of the last four appalling series. Can you not see that it is in any way better? I suppose not. Ah well. We're not making this show for you, or even the eight million people who previously tuned in for a quick wank over Daisy.

Jesus, try and be a little less blinkered. If you don't like it, fine. But if your reasons are ones like 'that jokes old' (the show has to tackle the stories that happened while it was off air etc. etc. etc.) or 'the presenters are useless' (they are both an incomparable amount better than Iain Lee and Daisy) then you don't really deserve to be given a voice.

Express yourselves in a little more sensible, and a little less reactionary, fashion.

TWENTY fucking writers. TWENTY. How can we all be wrong? I don't know. And I don't understand. What the fuck do you want? Blood? Well we can't give that to you.

I'm too tired to analyse everything you've said -- and, given TV reviewers' need for good copy, I looked to this forum for the only sensible opinion on the show, the voice of the people as it were -- but I shall in future.

Yours, in futility,

The 11 O'Clock Show.

(this post does not represent the views of the 11 O'Clock Show, but neither do yours)
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'A Bit of the 11 O'Clock Show' on Wed Oct 4 01:42:03 BST 2000:

Shouldn't really have signed that post 'The 11 O'Clock Show' -- not fair, although I don't feel my opinions fair off a concensus. So many of your assumptions are wrong. How about 'A Bit Of It'?
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'A Bit of the 11 O'Clock Show' on Wed Oct 4 01:43:12 BST 2000:

Ah God, I'm not making sense. That's what unbridled fury and frustration does to you.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By subbes on Wed Oct 4 01:45:33 BST 2000:

Well, that sent the topic into silence.

I can't understand what's wrong with it. most probably that there's so many shows to _do_, it's bound to be spread a bit thin... er... don't hit me.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Aslef Napkyn' on Wed Oct 4 09:10:46 BST 2000:

I would imagine, Mr 11 ocs, that most (if not all) forum people watched the show with an open mind. I would have loved it if the show could have been turned around, but it just wasn't to be.
And I guess there's not not much difference in *your* lot thinking you've produced a strong programme, and *us* lot thinking it was utter cack.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By TJ on Wed Oct 4 09:20:13 BST 2000:

1) Twenty writers can easily be wrong. For a start, you seem to think that we're all wrong...

2) You may be making a show with a certain audience in mind, but remember that when its on television, it's there for every audience to see, and that includes easily offended middle aged middle class people, cynical Chris Morris fans who expect something of a higher standard, and the aforementioned blokes that wank over Daisy Donovan. It's not like something that you buy by choice over the counter.

Other than that, good argument.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Jon' on Wed Oct 4 09:32:42 BST 2000:

I couldn't be bothered reading all the previous comments, but could I just point out, in case anyone else hasn't, that the Style Wankers and Bulla (previously 'Buller') were both doing virtually the same routines in Comedy Nation 3 years ago?

There were some of the only good things in CN. Nice to see them back.

So New 11OCS = OK bits of Old CN + topical stuff. That's the new formula.



I think they should have stand-up slots in it. And a live band slot, so you don't have to fill the whole thing with comedy. And a Richard Stilgoe slot at the end (get RS himself, if he's up for it). These are meant to be genuine, constructive suggestions.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Jon' on Wed Oct 4 09:39:13 BST 2000:

I signed that with my password. So why was the name in quotes?

Oh, has my account been cancelled? What did I say?
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Jon' on Wed Oct 4 14:09:33 BST 2000:

Anyhow, I didn't mind the Style sketch when I first saw it, but it was a surprise, and slightly irritating to see it all over again.

Buller was alright on CN. Well, I remember there was an interview with Michael Parkinson that was good.

I'll give it another go tonight, now they've got the 1st night nerves over with.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Jake' on Wed Oct 4 14:26:46 BST 2000:

Just incase you care, which you rightfully probably don't, I do the Jon Holmes and Andy Hurst website. So as you know. www.poorquality.co.uk - a deserving name, so you would no doubt think.

Now, is it just me that thinks that the worst thing about the new series is the bloke on the intro? Who is it, because it certainly isn't Tommy Vance, and the only other bloke who could have pulled it off, I reckon, would be Dave Lamb.
Anyway, you're right, Jon and Sarah weren't up to the standard of previous projects, but then it was a new experience for both of them. Jon says it was the "wierdest thing I've ever done". Give them, and the writing team, time to 'gel' together a bit more, it will no doubt get better.
Give it a chance, it wasn't that bad.
Cheers now.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Jon' on Wed Oct 4 14:29:31 BST 2000:

I will do.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Australian Janet' on Wed Oct 4 16:05:21 BST 2000:

UK people, I feel your pain.
The disappointed viewers, the frustrated and upset 11O'CS writer...(incidentally, you're not the frustrated 11O'CS writer I know, are you?)
Is there anything constructive anyone can give this poor man to take to the next writers meeting? You've told him what you don't like, but few have said what they liked or what was better than last series. Go on, give him something positive to go to work on.
(I specify gender here based on the lamentable lack of women employed as comedy writers. I'm not bitter at all, oh no, not me).
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By Justin on Wed Oct 4 18:45:17 BST 2000:

There are twenty writers on this show, all of whom have worked on a variety of shows, many of which you like.

Fine - in which case just transmit copies of their cvs for half an hour.

Why should their judgement be so impaired as to provide you with a half hour bucket of shit? There's no point arguing with you. We should never have even entertained the slightest hope that you should appreciate the attempts that have been made by the team behind this show to make it funnier, more intelligent, more interesting and essentially have more point than any of the last four appalling series.

Are you saying it's *our* fault that we don't like it, then?


Can you not see that it is in any way better? I suppose not. Ah well. We're not making this show for you, or even the eight million people who previously tuned in for a quick wank over Daisy.

That's a shame - look at the C4 website and you'll see a huge number of idiots who appeared to watch it for just that reason.
>
>Jesus, try and be a little less blinkered. If you don't like it, fine. But if your reasons are ones like 'that jokes old' (the show has to tackle the stories that happened while it was off air etc. etc. etc.)

I may not have made this clear, but this is what I meant. Old jokes are fine, but if you've had nearly six months while the show's been off the air to think up some gags, and you still can't write a decent joke individually or between you (so it would seem, anyway), then what hope do you stand for the rest of the series, when you have to come up with a new show every day from scratch. I'm not saying that's entirely the writers' fault - it's C4's for not thinking it through.

or 'the presenters are useless' (they are both an incomparable amount better than Iain Lee and Daisy) then you don't really deserve to be given a voice.

I felt sorry for Sarah Alexander and Jon Holmes, but I still didn't think they cut it, to be honest, even if it was their first night. But if you think I shouldn't be expressing such an opinion, that displays an amazing arrogance.


>TWENTY fucking writers. TWENTY. How can we all be wrong? I don't know. And I don't understand. What the fuck do you want? Blood? Well we can't give that to you.
>
I feel terrible having to point this out, but this is not Save the Children we're talking about here. It's a comedy show. Which wasn't funny (at least we agree with the C4 site on something, I suppose). You want sympathy? I can't really offer any, I'm afraid.

>I'm too tired to analyse everything you've said --

Seriously, it must be galling to have poured your heart and soul into a programme, only to find people carping about it the instant it's over. I mean this - I genuinely tuned in with fingers crossed, ready to be entertained. We need a good British comedy show at the moment - there's bugger all else going on. I don't think I'm alone in the belief that I wanted it to be an improvement. But because I don't think it is, that does not mean I'm going to keep schtum about its failings.

Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'zaber' on Wed Oct 4 18:49:33 BST 2000:

> Is there anything constructive anyone can give this poor man to take to the next writers meeting? You've told him what you don't like, but few have said what they liked or what was better than last series. Go on, give him something positive to go to work on.

Hmm. How about, screw it all up and start again.

Oh, alright. The only line I found funny, was the one about the rambler "shitting fizzy gravy". It was "Brookeresque".

Maybe there should be fewer writers. Too many cooks, etc.

How about trying to develop some running gags. It'd make it friendlier, and give something for people to hang onto amongst the other "material".

Give the bloke a catch phrase, like "up the arse", or "doggy style". You know, the usual clever 11ocs style.

I really don't see why we should be constructive. We don't get paid to write your material.

Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'zaber' on Wed Oct 4 18:53:28 BST 2000:

And just to back Justin up, I don't think any of us wanted it to be crap. I'd be really pleased if we could have 3 nights a week of funny (or at least average) comedy. It just doesn't seem to be happening.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Wed Oct 4 18:57:23 BST 2000:

>1) Twenty writers can easily be wrong. For a start, you seem to think that we're all wrong...

You guys aren;t writeres, you're just some geeks with computers

>2) You may be making a show with a certain audience in mind, but remember that when its on television, it's there for every audience to see, and that includes easily offended middle aged middle class people, cynical Chris Morris fans who expect something of a higher standard, and the aforementioned blokes that wank over Daisy Donovan. It's not like something that you buy by choice over the counter.

Well then they should stick to programmes that they like and in the case of chris moris fans they deserve everything they get.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By Justin on Wed Oct 4 19:04:53 BST 2000:

>>1) Twenty writers can easily be wrong. For a start, you seem to think that we're all wrong...
>
>You guys aren;t writeres, you're just some geeks with computers

You're not even a writer(er) on the strength of that sentence. Learn to spell, please.
>
>>2) You may be making a show with a certain audience in mind, but remember that when its on television, it's there for every audience to see, and that includes easily offended middle aged middle class people, cynical Chris Morris fans who expect something of a higher standard, and the aforementioned blokes that wank over Daisy Donovan. It's not like something that you buy by choice over the counter.
>
>Well then they should stick to programmes that they like and in the case of chris moris fans they deserve everything they get.

Most of the 11ocs writers have been quite happy to watch Morris's stuff and nick ideas from all over the shop without actually understanding why the fuck it's amusing in the first place. Don't start having a go at us - we didn't like it. So go make it better.

Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By george on Wed Oct 4 19:38:57 BST 2000:

To Anonymous and others who are probaly reading this: Why the semi-constant moaning?
>>>Well, after all the pre-series talk of how this was going to better, it basically wasn't. So you want something a little more constructive? OK then......

1.With new presenters at the helm, C4/Talkback could have used it as the perfect opportunity to completely overhaul the show following the semi-constant criticism of the programme. Titles, format, the whole lot. They didn't.

2. All those writers and not one funny joke. It seems incoherent, as if all these scribes were working on their own. The result was a mess, with poor links and what seemed to be a loos of nerve by the presenters. I admittely understand the point of *First show nerves* but you've got to give them better material - and the writers and production staff need to give it some structure.

....and lastly, don't whine if you can't take criticism.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By george on Wed Oct 4 19:41:52 BST 2000:

> I meant 'LOSS of nerve'. Apologies for the typing error.

(See? even I get things wrong, but at least I won't sulk if someone points it out to me, and I'm happy to admit that I made a mistake).
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Peter O' on Wed Oct 4 20:08:24 BST 2000:

I think the show is supposed to be cheap, rather than good. Is it cheap? Then that's okay. It's certainly not expensive for me to avoid watching it.

Constructivity:

1. Get rid of painful "funky" music. Replace with the march from Prokofiev's "Romeo and Juliet" or some other weird atmospheric choice. It should cut out suddenly, and then sudden bursts of it should be played during the show, sometimes for too long.

2. Titles should be black background with white text. The words "ELEVEN O'CLOCK SHOW" should grow and shrink as the opening music plays.

3. Presenters should not appear on screen. They should VO and be represented by amaturish-looking finger puppets.

3.1. Drop the audience.

3.2. Presenters should not adopt smug Angus Deayton sing-song sarcasm voices. They should instead talk flatly and occasionally in west country accents. (But not Brummy.)

4. Throughout the show (whatever else is happening) subtitles should scroll very slowly past in a black strip at the bottom of the screen. They should be completely surreal and mind bending.

5. Go out into the street and bother pedestrians - yes it's been done, but it can never be done too much. The theme of the bothering should NEVER be topical.

6. When dropping references to celebs, you don't have to be all that nasty. It's often funnier to just be overly familiar, e.g. don't talk about pissing Jeffrey Archer for being a bad criminal mother. Instead, announce an appeal to raise money to buy him a shed to go and be embarrassed in. Keep going back to the "shedometer" throughout the show.

I'd watch it!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Wed Oct 4 21:20:10 BST 2000:

TWENTY fucking writers. TWENTY. How can we all be wrong? I don't know.

Hmm well maybe they should give your job to someone else as I find it hard to believe there are people out there who think you're doing it right.

And I don't understand. What the fuck do you want? Blood? Well we can't give that to you.

I think I speak for everyone when I say you might have missed the point- we all would like to be able to sit in front of C4 at 11 and not cringe through half an hour of feeble television. Thanks.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'They were >>quotes- just so you know...' on Wed Oct 4 21:21:08 BST 2000:

>>TWENTY fucking writers. TWENTY. How can we all be wrong? I don't know.

Hmm well maybe they should give your job to someone else as I find it hard to believe there are people out there who think you're doing it right.

>>And I don't understand. What the fuck do you want? Blood? Well we can't give that to you.

I think I speak for everyone when I say you might have missed the point- we all would like to be able to sit in front of C4 at 11 and not cringe through half an hour of feeble television. Thanks.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Wed Oct 4 21:24:01 BST 2000:

>>>And I don't understand. What the fuck do you want? Blood? Well we can't give that to you.

Well, Jam was very funny...
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'paul twist' on Wed Oct 4 22:58:10 BST 2000:


>Oh, alright. The only line I found funny, was the one about the rambler "shitting fizzy gravy". It was "Brookeresque".

Nah, the phrase "fizzy gravy" is really unoriginal, and was probably popularised (as with most such phrases) by Viz about 5 years ago.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'zaber' on Wed Oct 4 23:36:48 BST 2000:

Ahh, well, I've only ever read Viz once, so it seemed funny to me.


Another 11OCS, another laugh free zone. I find it really weird. There seems to be jokes coming from their mouths, but none of them are funny. And with the writer on the forum (who's so proud of his work, he operates under a Sue Denim) being so defensive and unbelieving that people should hate the show, I'm beginning to think it's me who's wrong about this.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By george on Wed Oct 4 23:41:15 BST 2000:

Just seen show 2. It is still terrible.
Subject: from the C4 Reach4 Forum...
Posted By 'Mmmmmmm' on Wed Oct 4 23:57:52 BST 2000:

Feel free to berate and abuse this silly twat using the email address he so thoughtfully provided us!!

11 O'Clock Show
posted by Mark Stockwell on 23:44 4/10/2000
(email) Mark.Stockwell@tesco.net

I can't believe what you have done to the 11O'Clock show. Ian Lee was brilliant and Daisey Donovan was the glamour/sex interest. Sarah Alexander is undoubtedly a brilliant comic actress but perhaps better suited to comedy sketch shows. Where as your new male lead, well he just does not have the same cutting wit that Lee had. I only hope that Ian Lee has gone on to something even better with you.
I miss them both!
Yours sinecerely
Mark Stockwell


AAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHAAAAAHHHHH!!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'paul twist' on Thu Oct 5 00:50:02 BST 2000:

I think this "Mark Stockwell" is Iain Lee, or at least a mate of his.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By subbes on Thu Oct 5 00:56:47 BST 2000:

Iain has friends?


sorry. too easy.
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Nev Fountain' on Thu Oct 5 09:49:39 BST 2000:

Isn't it a little bit excessive having a go at this bloke, just because he has different tastes from you..?

I know a lot of you don't like the show, some of you have valid criticisms, and make astute points, but it does seem there is a rather ugly shit-pushed-through-letterbox undercurrent which is decidedly unhealthy.

Make your opinions known by all means, but hunting down and attacking anyone who ever laughed at an 11o'clock show joke is a tad extreme, isn't it?
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By 'Anonymous' on Thu Oct 5 09:56:59 BST 2000:

>it does seem there is a rather ugly shit-pushed-through-letterbox undercurrent which is decidedly unhealthy.

He's describing 11OCS!
Subject: Re: The All New 11 O'Clock Show
Posted By sheep on Thu Oct 5 10:17:17 BST 2000:

There's a new thread for this, but I'll just mention here that I found Wednesday night's show Not Apalling. Well, the first 5 minutes anyway - I switched over after I did finr the "polio" thing appalling. But the round of jokes told by Holmes and the girl at the top of the show were, well, ok. Not very funny (some didn't work at all), but made me smile now and again.

In that regard, at least, it's improved. My previous viewings of this show have involved my jaw being wide open in disbelief.

Maybe next time I'll manage 10 minutes before having to switch off?


Forum Archive: The Return Of The 11 O'Clock Show
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