So I was back in New York, at least for a few weeks.... WMX set up another show the next Sunday! Weiler Park was the location, and I decided to beat him to the punch, by opening the show while he was going to the bathroom or something... I came out and mocked the EWA, about how they'd only had like 4 shows in the whole 9 months that I was gone, and how their limited roster kept no-showing, and how pathetic it was without the presence of Psycohol... I let 'em know I was here to liven the EWA up once again out of my own generosity... and since I was opening the show, I made sure that I MADE the matches! Drixon vs. Wolfman X in the opening match for the World Title! Then I would get the winner later! Now that's how you set up matches! I then played my brand new hit single song, "PB&J" for everyone, a song I recorded a few days earlier with my friends' band in Albany... as I relished in the awesomeness of my rad song, WMX came out interrupting it and all pissed off! He tried shooting down all I had to say, yada yada... but he couldn't change the matches I made, HA! So he fought Drixon, and it looked like he was gonna win with the Blitzkrieg, but out I run perfect timing, dropkicking him in the face, and Backflippin' all over his face, followed by a Drixon Dominator and a 1,2,3! Because of me, the EWA World Tile's longest reign by one man ever HAD COME TO AN END! After a year and so many months as champ, I singlehandedly, almost like a GOD, said, "Champion No More!" And smite it from him, letting Drixon take it! Revenge is sweet.... bloodying me up last Fall, will ya? Here's a bit of payback! After the match, I saw Amazon Man hanging up on the Tennis Court Cage, and never having actually met him before, figured I'd go talk... my mistake, he leapt off the cage and beat me down pretty bad there, ripping off his shirt, exposing his v-shaped hair patch on his upper chest! Like Blanka, he was an animal from the Amazon! Only months before I heard this man suffered a heart attack, and now here he is kicking my arse around! I'll keep my distance....... for now! Onto the next match, a big 4-Way for Kamilian's IC Title, like any of the rest of us wanted such a lowly belt! Kammy vs. Me vs. Drixon vs. WMX! This was gonna be fun! Although I got some good action in with both of the champs, Kammy and Drixon, the major heat here was obviously between myself and Wolfman X! And I didn't hafta pretend to be Psycometer this time... I could be myself! Unleash my full Chakra Fighting abilities! We both had our moments as always, but unfortunately we weren't focused on winning the match so much as hurting each other! It ended for us, as he Chokeslammed me, while I simutaneously hooked on an Armbar, so I was pinned while he tapped out at the same time! We were both eliminated! But after a little more brawling between Kammy and Drix, mine and WMX's continuing battle came back out into the match area, causing a no-contest, and having no winner declared! Next, to piss WMX off all the more to my glee, his own cousin, debuting at this show, the Ohio Express came out to my "PB&J" song as a big Psycohol fan! I had coaxed her before the match to worship me! It was great! I trained her with a few moves and all that! She was supposed to fight Ninja, but when WMX heard her come out to my music, he came out instead and as always, sinking to yet another new low, ended up fighting and beating up his own cousin! He's beaten girls down before, sure, but his own family?! Sheesh! Am I good or what?! Breaking up his family and all, I was interfering in his life so much these past couple weeks, it was just hilarious to me! And in the Main Event of the Show, it was me vs. Drixon for that World Title! Sure, I helped Drixon out earlier, but we weren't friends, I just wanted WMX outta the way, for an easier Title win... me and Drix were both tired obviously from the 4-way... but he had the match with WMX earlier too, so I had a slight advantage... all in my plan! It's brains that win, not size! So we had a great match, I hit a sweet Corkscrew Plancha off the same bleachers I was Powerbombed off of years and years ago! Finally as he seemed to be lifting me up for a Powerbomb, I had hold of a metal tray, and slammed him over the head with it, at the summit of the move! He fell backwards! I gave him a Standing Moonsault for a near pin, then a Moonsault off a bench to finish the job! I had reclaimed the Title which I haven't held for nearly 2 years! Psycohol was now a 7-time EWA World Champion! And as I walked off, I informed them that they had only One More Show to get this belt off my waist, or I'd be taking it back to Hawaii with me!!!
So the next show, I knew would be my Final EWA Show of this brief vacation back home.... it was do or die time for WMX, if he wanted to keep his World Title! And unfortunately, we had a very limited roster on this day too, which sucked! What has happened to the once mihty EWA??? I dunno, but I did know, that at this level of sadness, it did not deserve to even have a World Title, and I was determined to rid the federation of it! In the opening, WMX had a brief real-life argument/almost-fight with Kamilian... very awkward and out of nowhere! But we tried to put that behind us and go on with the show... Kammy had a couple matches, he was running a sort of Jobber Gauntlet... his 3rd match was to be Suicide, but little did he know, I had already vanquished Suicide backstage, and came charging out with a mean dropkick! I beat Kammy down until he was bleeding all over, finally avenging myself for the part he took in my bloodying upon my departure from NY many months before! To add insult to injury, I busted him over the head with a garbage can, putting his head right through the side of it, making a hoile in it, and it was full of garbage! Hahaha!!! Up next was the Main Event! Wolfman X vs. Psycohol one on one for the EWA Title! I had made a special call on my cell phone before the match to guarantee my victory... I'll get to that in a minute... so we had one of our classic matches, where I hit another sweet Corkscrew Plancha and a bunch of my other signature moves... he gave me all the big ones too, but in the end, as usual, I used my cunning to outwit his stupidity and size! Whereas I knew about his girlfriend being pregnant, and being due to give birth at any day now, I had called noneother than Mr. Execution to play a little joke on WMX! As WMX had me right where he wanted me, he got a phone call from Mr. Ex, pretending to be a doctor... Ex told him that his girl was in labor now, and he had to get down there at once! Caught off guard and distracted on the phone, I came from behind with the Schoolboy roll-up for the 1,2,3!!! The plan had worked perfectly!!! Still fooled, WMX ran off to the hospital apparently, and I stood there the victor, with my EWA Title, proud of my little hoax! Aparently WMX soon found out that the whole call was a fake (his girlfriend ended up having the baby the next day!!!! WMX was now a father!!!), Mr. Ex like an idiot called and admitted to WMX what happened, and WMX went and found Ex to beat down... then WMX came for me... I was revisiting the old EWA Arena, and saying goodbye again, when a chair flies outta nowhere, that I catch and... BIG BOOT! WMX picks me up and hooks on the sleeper til I was unconscious! He claimed that the EWA "suits" say that since I'm going back to Hawaii ad am unable to defend the EWA Title, that I am stripped... so he takes my belt, and then just to piss me off... he CUTS MY HAIR!!! My 10 inches lockes of hair that I have grown out so I can spike em up and show off to everyone! He cut them off, leaving only a girly little tail in the back!!! That Mother%&$#er!!! Now I gotta start at nothing!!! Years to get back to that hair-length!!! Well... he left me lying there... a while later, he came back out, and I kept laying there, playing dead... he began posing up on his back steps, when I decided to extract revenge, ran up and hit him with a chair! Then I continued to bash him with the chair, until his face was a crimson mess of blood! Revenge for that bloddying of myself long ago, revenge for the haircut, for the stripping of the Title, for everything! And to make sure I got complete revenge, I took the EWA World Title on my way out, and proclaimed that if I was not going to be champion, then NOBODY was going to be champion! And although I was not officially Champ anymore, I was taking the belt to Hawaii with me anyways, as PROMISED!!! I walked off angry, yet satisfied!
But that was not the end for this trip home... cuz the very next day, I put together the very first PXW Show in over 2 years! The previous weekend, I shot some footage of myself, Everydayman, Psykdelik and Robert Lane all hanging out at Psyk's birthday party where I gave Psyk my Psycho Xtreme Title as a present, so I clipped that at the beginning of the show, but back to the real day of the show... I had gotten a bunch of old faces together! And I Psycohol had only one insignificant match on the whole card, but it mattered not, this was for the PXW, not for me! So I opened the show, explaining just that, and of course with the EWA World Title over my shoulder proudly! So my match was of the lowest sorts, against none other than Mr. Splooge! I destroyed him in probably less than 2 minutes to take my win for the show... the funny thing, is shortly after this match, one of Norwich's finest, Norwich Police Dept. showed up at the PXW Arena, claiming that someone called about somebody beating down a "black" man with a piece of wood! We were all like "WHAT?!" There's no black dudes wrestling in the PXW... and it took us a few seconds to figure out that some idiot must have seen me beating down Mr. Splooge with a cookie sheet! Now if someone can't tell the difference between a dark-skinned person, and a guy wearing an all-black ninja suit, as well as a thin cookie sheet to a chunk of wood, then they truly must have been old and blind or a backwoods redneck hillbilly racist mofo.... I have no idea, but we all laughed and joked about it the rest of the show, and the police officer said it was ok, as long as we stayed in our yard... funny stuff... Psycohol beating down a "black" man... sheesh, what kinda reputation are they trying to give me?! Anyways, after that, I was hanging out backstage, when I was attacked suddenly by the returning Psycometer!!! That's right, he was full-on pissed that I had impersonated him at that one EWA Show, and stole his clothes! He beat me down pretty good there! Lumberjack also returned, and defeated Mr. Ex for his 1st PXW Title reign! But it didn't last long, as Psycometer defeated him in the Main Event for his 1st Title reign!!! Being the ref for that match, I made sure to get a little revenge, by taking Psycometer out after he won!
And that folks... that was my vacation tour! I flew back to Hawaii a couple days later, hung the EWA World Title proudly over my bed on the wall... and laughed every time I looked at it... apparently back home, WMX claimed that there were 3 ways to go about dealing with the situation for the EWA... 1.. Buy a new belt and make it the World Title, which would be a disgrace... 2.. Have a Champion with no material Belt around his waste, but that was just stupid... or 3.. Either WMX would come to Hawaii to take the real Belt back eventually, or wait for Psycohol's next trip home to take it back.... and that was the plan he chose..... will he have the cojones to come out and find me, or will he wait for my next return?! That was the question.........
So I waited patiently month after month for Wolfman X to rear his ugly head in Hawaii… to surprise me one day from the shadows, and try to steal his Title back… I stay alert, on high guard… take my Kung Fu classes to learn self-defense in case he tries some thing sneaky……. But he never comes…… I hear through Richard Head, and other sources that Natas had returned to the EWA! What shame I was 5000 miles away. I hear that they had created a NEW EWA World Title since the competition demanded it, reusing one of their old belts as the new Title, while I sat over in paradise, the TRUE CHAMPION, with the long-coveted TRUE EWA CHAMPIONSHIP BELT! How dare they! Natas had won the Title in the Tournament or whatever they held…. Wolfman X was not coming to find me, he was not coming to reclaim the real belt…… Also another big event was happening in the EWA, which I was bound to miss, EWA’s 100th Anniversary Show! How could Psycohol, one of the BACKBONES of that company for years, NOT be a part of that show?! I was determined to be a part of it no matter what it took! I went out and bought a $400 camcorder for the sole purpose… I stalked the streets and lleys of Honolulu, looking for someone to fight, a bum, a local, who cares! I Needed any opponent to fight, in order to send the footage to the EWA to have it included in the 100th Show which was only a couple months off! No luck, everyone I challenged thought I was mad, and wanted nothing to do with it. One day I happened to be hiking with my camera, checking out the lush rainforests mountains of my island, when I came upon some creepy silent hiker dude. He was sitting in my favorite spot, and I sked him to leve… he would not, so all of a sudden, we began brawling! Hell’s yeah! He left with the upper hand, but I tracked him down the trail a ways, and beat his @$$ a bit, leaving him on the ground! He caught up with me, attacked me, and so on, this kept going til we got to a clearing on the very top of a high mountain! I made the match official! I had found my opponent for EWA100! No refs, just 2 men going at it! We fought back and forth, he actually had some skills! But in the end I overcame with my experience and pinned him for 3 on the windy mountaintop and retained my reputation as Psycohol the Mankiller! I called him the Crazy @$$hole Hiker Dude, or something like that, and sent the video the the EWA, giving the ‘suits’ specific instructions! They pressed play and showed my match right in the middle of the “World Title” Match between Natas and the Disruptor, stopping the show for several minutes! I like to think that it caused Natas to lose his Title to Big Daddy Dis by my own distraction! This brief little appearance on EWA TV would hafta do until I could make it back to New York with the REAL Title and show them boys who’s boss!
So I continued enjoying my time in Hawaii, never forgetting the EWA, but putting it behind me for the time being… meanwhile, the EWA was flourishing in a sort of rebirth, with yet another New Generation of wrestlers… with Natas back, and WMX still helming things, the new guys X-Loco and Hack McNasty rose, forming the New Reich to oppose the “old regime”… whatever, I don’t care about that…. In fact, all that was happening before EWA100, and Natas actually Retired again at EWA100, saying that the talent is not what it used to be, and that he told his girlfriend he wouldn’t do it anymore… damn girls, they always make you stop doing what you like to do, right? Anyways, he took ver Commisioner-ship for a little while, before finally leaving, fed up with the low-talent level… yes, 2007 was actually a record-breaking year, where the EWA had more shows than any other year, including EWA1… they had like 17 shows, 2 more than EWA1!!! But the fact is, X-Loco, Hack McNasty and Gorebelly, along with Keven James, Disruptor and WMX cannot come near the glory years of Jevon, Ground Zero, Natas, Psycohol, and Drakon, or even the Max/General, Vince, Disruptor years…. So yeah, they were producing, but not presenting as well! Anyways, I figured I’d go and see what this new Generation was all about… so at the end of the year, right around Xmas time, I flew back to New York and made my next brief return! And I brought MY Title with me, the REAL EWA World Title… I wanted to Unite it with their 2nd rate ripoff Title which was currently being held by none other than a Noob, a Rookie in the name of X-Loco… he was a big guy… but I wasn’t afraid!
In actuality that was not my plan, it would have been a nice plan, and it is how this story turns out, but my true intention was much simpler and was of familial reasons… I was on a trip to Canada to visit my mom… never visited her place there, so I was catching up with her after not seeing for years, since I had moved to Hawaii… somehow Wolfman X got wind of my trip, and made this his chance to get his REAL EWA Title back where it belongs…. Cuz yes I was carrying it, as I do most everywhere, so people know who I am! So he drove all the way up through Niagra Falls, through Toronto, and to the smalltown where my mother lives over Lake Ontario, and found me! He is no doubt a skilled tracker! As I was hugging my mom goodbye and headed out the backdoor to head back to the airport, when I was attacked by Wolfman X outside and shoved into the trunk of his car! He drove for I dunno how many constant hours, until I noticed we were sitting at a standstill for awhile… I managed to get out of the trunk and see we were in a giant traffic jam! Angry as I was, I knew I missed my plane, and sucked it up, and got into the car with WMX and faced the traffic the rest of the way through Canada, into New York, and back to Norwich, and planned my revenge! I haven’t stepped foot in a real EWA Show outside of my self-taped Hawaiian match in EWA100, since EWA88, back in 2006 during my last vacation, and now we were at EWA111 at the end of 2007!
I came out with my EWA Title, which they apparently “stripped” me of, or “vacated” or something long ago… I don’t remember who did the official challenging, if I challenged their current champion X-Loco, or if he came out and challenged me, but the match was destined for this show to see who the True Champ really was! His partner Hack McNasty was nowhere to be seen, just as he was nowhere to be seen on ANY of the shows I’ve ever returned at since then it seems… afraid of me eh? Anyways, after all the Jobber battles were outta the way, and WMX having an unsuccessful Title Shot against Loco, it was my turn to bring some old-school high flying lessons to this Goliath! Sure he tossed me around like he’s never been able to toss around fatties like WMX, Face, or Disruptor or anyone else before, but I assaulted him from the sky and with kicks of fury! He put on a better show than expected, but in the end I defeated him like I was always bound to! Psycohol was once again the Undisputed EWA World Champion, no questions! 8th Time! Personally I never lost it, but technically it’s a separate Title reign… fine by me! Few weeks left before my newly acquired plane ticket was dated, so why not kick a few more arses while I’m home?
So that first show back proved my superiority and lack of ring-rust, despite my time away! Defeating their current champ, who was nothing but a joke to me made me wonder why I stayed away for so long, and didn’t stay here defending my status in the New York Backyards… I dunno, as much as I loved doing this, it would inevitably ruin my body if I continued doing it at the pace I had always been doing it before… and I did miss the weekly or monthly backyard wrestling that had consumed my life the preceding 10 years! I do love performing for everyone and looked back so fondly on what I had done there, and what I could still do, all the storylines being missed while I was in the Aloha state… all the great matches I am missing out on… all the places I used to wrestle and hang out… I missed them all… the smell of the grass, the sound of the backyard, cars driving by, birds chirping, wrestling in the snow, the mud… and I don’t feel old, I do have little pains, but nothing like other people my age do, who claim they feel their age… I keep in shape and feel younger than I am! But I know if I continued this lifestyle, that would change, and my bones or joints would weaken over time… and I was enjoying Hawaii, meeting new people, found a girlfriend finally! I am very proud and happy of my move to the Islands, but I will always have love and respect and memories of me true home in Upstate New York! Okay, back to the shows…
The 2nd show back was right before the New Year of 2008… and it was dubbed “EWA Legends” since Natas and Drakon and Drixon and WMX and Disruptor and myself were all in attendance! I had 3 BIG matches this show, no pushovers… I did not fight like Ninja and Face or anything like that… this may have been one of my toughest shows ever, by all the big-name opponents I fought almost back-to-back! I had to fight 3 former champs all in a row basically, not because some Commissioner was trying to be mean to me, but because of all these surprise challenges!!! I was told that a former champion wanted to fight me or something as the Main Event and it was impied to be Drakon, so I was down… but I was booked to fight X-Loco for my Title first… another 3rd challenger happened in between, and because all 3 were of Main Event Status, it was like the show had 3 Main Events… all involving me… Daayyum! Anyways before the my match with X-Loco, a highlight in my career happened, that didn’t involve me at all, except that, I think I was “reffing” the match maybe… Kamilian fought a new guy Priest and Face in a 3-Way Match… when Face pinned Priest to win the match, Kammy got so pissed, cuz he’s never lost a 3-Way Match before that he quit the EWA forever, and hasn’t shown his face since, but has been heard badmouthing the Federation ever since… He’s truly got a grudge for Wolfman X now… I dunno why, it was Kammy’s fault for not breaking that cover and losing the match, not WMX’s fault for being a building block for the EWA… so Kammy was gone, and we were all happy! So my 1st Match of the day was against X-Loco, the guy that manhandled me the show before, despite me pulling off the victory! This was his rematch, and we had another crazy match with him tossing me all over the place again, softening me up for what was to come later with the other 2 former-Champs! In the end, Wolfman X ran out and attacked us both for a Double Countdown Draw! He did this, wanting a shot at my Title, so he prevented X-Loco from winning it, and pissed me off enough to accept his challenge! Why I accepted it, knowing I had just fought Loco, and still had a Main Event against an unknown former champ is beyond my current rational thinking, but I guess at the moment I was angry and I live by instinct out there, and I wanted to whoop on WMX! He called for a new kind of match… a copyright infringement match, where each of us takes a former-EWA star’s-of-our-choice arsenal of moves and use only them throughout the whole match to win, and if we used one of our own moves, we would be DQ’d! I chose Mr. Execution’s move repertoire, and WMX chose Face’s! So as pissed as we were at each other, I think we kinda had fun pretending to be those two losers and were being a bit silly making fun of them… in the end, I performed my own Handspring Clothesline into WMX’s own Big Boot, where WMX thought he pinned me for the Title, but Commish Natas overturned it saying that we both hit moves that were our own, and not of Face or Execution, so it was a Draw, or Double DQ… two draws in a row, but against 2 top caliber opponents! WMX had a quick easy match against Splooge, and then I was up for a 3rd BIG MATCH, the Main Event… Out came Natas! It was not Drakon that I was to fight but the Dark Lord of Hell himself, Natas! He had retired earlier in the year, during this busy year for the EWA, when he lost a “Retirement Match” against WMX at EWA100, and was currently the Commissioner… but he wanted one last go at me, Psycohol… cuz he always thought his best matches in his career were… well… against me! As much as I’ve hated him in the past, I respected that. But I had 2 matches before this match with him! This was gonna be rough! We didn’t have our best match ever, but we laid it down and had a good one, and after 2 tiring matches leading up to this, Natas beat me in his last match ever with a lil help from his old New Breed buddy Drakon! Dang cheaters! Ah well… it was time to rest, cuz that show was pretty crazy! I figured I had one show left in me before flying back to Hawaii with the Undisputed EWA World Title again, once and for all!
The final show of that trip home, I got to fight another newcomer since I’d last been there, named Gorebelly! Another giant like Loco, but not quite as successful! He threw me around a bit, but I prevailed in the end, and took one more step to my taking the Title back to Hawaii! One match left, and Why Oh Why was it X-Loco again challenging for what I took from him?! Anyways, I was well on my way to winning the match, when the selfish Wolfman X ran out and attacked me, knowing he couldn’t let that Title go back to Hawaii, cuz he’s too chicken to go out there and find me! His attempt didn’t get me pinned, but it led to my losing momentum and getting pinned by Loco a minute or two later! X-Loco kept their Title, it was staying in New York this time… they could have their Champion… I headed back out to Hawaii…
But I did not head out without doing one last little dirty deed… coming up next for the EWA, another milestone show, within less than year from the 100th Show, was their 10 Year Anniversary Show! It was in the middle of the week sometime, and the EWA usually worked weekends exclusively… WMX and the boys took off from work just to wrestle on the exact date of the 10th Anniversary… and just like the 100th Show, due to me being in Hawaii, I was gonna miss it! I may may miss being at the live event, but there’s NO WAY Psycohol’s gonna not Show his face on the show! So after that last show in NY, before I flew back to Honolulu, I grabbed a cameraman, headed to Wolfman X’s car, found the leather jacket he was going to wear to the upcoming Anniversary Show, took it out, laid it on the ground, and repeated history by p*ssing all over it! Can’t remember if I mentioned it or not earlier, probably not though, since it was before I joined the EWA, but Natas originally p*ssed on WMX’s jacket at the time back in EWA1… and may have been done again by certain people a few times since then… So I did that, threw it back in his car, and sent the tape to the “suits” to be shown during the 10th Anniversary Show while WMX was unknowingly wearing the tarnished item! From what I heard, he freaked out, flung the jacket off himself and cursed me heavily! I had made my mark on the 10th Anniversary Show, and more importantly made my mark on WMX’s favorite jacket!
So that 10 Year Anniversary Show went down on February 7th, 2008… meaning the 1st ever EWA Show where WMX fought Natas and Drakon(then Chainz) in a 3-Way Match up at the EWA Trailer in the Deep Snow happened back on February 7th of 1998… in the last decade… in the last century… the last millennia… I mean it was only 10 years, but that’s a looooong list of memories! What you’ve read here in these past zillion pages is a list of my memories, but there are soooooo many more classic EWA moments and feuds and matches that I am not a part of that you are not getting the full scope of! This dynasty has lasted longer than many real-legit professional organizations have! None of us have ever been paid one cent to do what we do, to put these shows together, to buy the “weapons,” the camcorders, stereo’s, or anything else we’ve ever had to put our own money towards… we love doing this and it is for ourselves… we feed off this… wrestlers have come and gone, but none of them ever forgotten… some of us have lasted longer and stayed true longer than others, but everyone as a whole from all the different era’s of the EWA have formed the stitchwork sewing together the unique and unpredictable entity of this League! How many Backyard Wrestling Federations have lasted 10 Years? How many have lasted 2 Years? Not many probably! The fad was over in the early 2000’s I’m sure, and only the ones who really loved it; and weren’t just doing it cuz it was cool, or cuz they were young and needed something to do; were the ones STILL DOING IT in 2008… I’m sure other Backyard Wrestlers elsewhere, even got big and made it into the pro’s… we never made it that far like we may have dreamed, but we didn’t give up the fun and excitement of performing just because we “didn’t make it.” We were still doing it and proud! Holding firm to our roots and our hearts… now back to the story about ME!
Just before this past trip to NY and those 3 Shows I competed in, I Psycohol found a girlfriend in Hawaii… she was a nice gal, and she has pretty much been stuck in Hawaii most of her life, and never been to my home of New York, so I really wanted to get her out there… unfortunately the winter trip was too soon for her to get tickets and go out and meet my family… I already had the tickets before I met her… but I wanted to get back to NY as soon as I could to show her around, so my next trip happened only half a year later, so I could bring her and show her around… being that I had to show her around, take her down to the NYC, and go all over the state, I did not have much time to wrestle, but I did get one show in! Face was to get a mystery opponent, which was to be ME! When they were waiting for the mystery opponent, I thought it’d be funny to trick ‘em and play someone else’s music… so we played General Incoherence’s Eminem crap-song and when it got to the part where he starts singing, I pause it and yell “NOOOOTTTT!!!!” My music plays and out I run! All it took was 2 moves! Dropkick, and then a Double-Licence Plate to the head! Okay there were a couple moves after that, but in reality that License Plate shot snuck around Face’s mask and cut his head open, and he was bleeding good… it wasn’t much longer before he passed out and I pinned him 1,2,3… I was a bit disappointed with the match, so obviously I had to have another! So the next match, a 3-way match for the World Title, currently held by WMX on his 10th Title reign, was myself, WMX and X-Loco to brawl it out with a drunk “Notorious” Jevon Hill as the special ref! WMX was still angry over the pee-stained jacket I left him months before… I fought with Loco some, WMX fought with Loco some, WMX and me almost fought but he tagged out… more of us tagging and fighting Loco… WMX finally gets some shots in on me, including a Blitzkrieg on top of Loco… actually almost anything that WMX did to me, was directed towards Loco… something was up… it all of a sudden seemed to turn into a double team on X-Loco, too many coincidences of me and WMX missing opportunities to attack each other…. And then we attacked Loco in unison! The Doctors of Extreme were back!!! No-contest called, and the match was over! Yep, we planned it… WMX knew I was comin’ home and we were bringin’ back the BEST TEAM that ever existed in the EWA! The show was over, but on a trip to NYC later that week, we got off on a scenic lookout point, facing Manhattan, in Jersey, and we explained the reformation….. the fact is, that X-Loco’s and Hack McNasty’s(a guy I never met, who never showed up at any shows that I came to) New Reich was claiming to be this and claiming to be that, and thinking they were the best around… I called WMX, apologized for the peeing incident, I promised to never turn my back on him again, like I always seemed to do in the past, and I told him we need to bring back the DOE! In this show which just happened, we were supposed to face the New Reich… the DOE vs. the New Reich to prove who was the best… but of course as I just mentioned, Hack McNasty no-showed as usual when I’m in town, so the show kinda went to Hell, and we had to drop the surprise on X-Loco alone… and that we did! So only one show this time, but it was a reunion for the DOE, so you can’t say it was uneventful… back to Hawaii again! And on a side note, Mr. Splooge moved out with me… no no no, not living with me, but Splooge came out to live in the Aloha State, so I had someone else familiar besides Richard Head that I could chill with on occasion out there… although he does get annoying… so back to Hawaii with my girlfriend, and Mr. Splooge, and on good terms with EWA Champ WMX for the 1st time in years!
Following this excursion to NY, the band I’ve been trying to get off the ground since moving to Hawaii, collectively known as Artificial Public, got a bit of a makeover, with new members, and we renamed ourselves False Crack(which means “sucker punch” in Hawaiian pidgin slang), and FINALLY got out of the practice rehearsals into Live Shows! So I began playing Live with False Crack on Valentine’s Day of 2009, and we played A LOT! We got a rep. quick with both the old-school bands and the new up and coming bands for bringing back that old fast aggressive hardcore, but keeping the themes silly and catchy, not so political… we infused different styles, like Surf, Doo Wop, Ska, Punk, bits of Metal, all backed by the 80’s-style superfast Hardcore that we loved so much, and we founded a new style which we called “Funcore” which really took off in the Hawaii scene! Many of our songs became instant hits and classics within the “808 Scene” and we gathered a decent following! And I was the lead singer, since I’m not the most musically inclined guy… can’t play guitar at all, and my drumming still needs a lot of work… so I was singin’ with False Crack all through 2009! Anyways, enough with my False Crack biznass, this story is about my Backyard Wrestling Career!
So that June, I made my surprise return to New York for one show. As WMX was opening the Show, I thought it’d be funny to call him up, cuz he’d naturally think I was in Hawaii, and he was talking to me during the Intro, and I walked right out into the lawn and the DOE were reunited! WMX was happy to see me, but a bit disappointed that Ground Zero never showed up to accept his 30 vs. 30 match(meaning they were both 30 years old, and were gonna fight it out like the good ol’ days)… I had an idea… I was 30 years old too, and I know that me and WMX were on good terms now, but hell, people better not be thinking we’re old and can’t do the stuff we did 10 years ago anymore! I thought to myself, how about me and Wolfman X have a friendly battle to prove that we STILL HAD IT! Okay I was a bit over-the-top in my idea, because I believe I described the match I wanted with him to be the friendliest, bloodiest, most vicious encounter we ever had… with the most brutal underhanded tactics and unbridled sportsmanship we could muster at the same time! The be unrelenting and not stop until someone was going to the hospital, all with a handshake and friendly pat on the back after the match… I don’t remember exactly what I said, but it was along those lines… WMX flat out refused to face me, cuz we were the DOE, and he didn’t want anything ruining our team! I saw his point and concurred, but I told him that we really should do this… 30 years old is a landmark, and I don’t feel old, I wanted to face him man to man at 30, like we did when we were 20, and have another classic battle… but he said no… so I had to formulate a plan…. He had a fight against a mystery opponent early on in the show, so this was my chance! Keven James came out to ref the match, but WMX saw him and thought he was the opponent… so they began trading blows a bit, then my music hit, I ran out and rolled WMX for the quick 1,2,3! This obviously wasn’t the 30 vs. 30 epic match I had planned, but it was the spark I needed to get that match! You see, Wolfman X HATES being One-Upped! He won’t have it! Our record was EVEN up to this match, and when I won this cheap little surprise match, that put my record one-up on him! He can only be tied or ahead of someone in wins in their win/loss record throughout their career! He could never let them have one more win than him… therefore I had him hook-line and sinker! He admitted to all of this and said yes, he will face me in this no holds barred 30 vs. 30 brawl where one of us has to send the other to the Hospital in order to win the match! His ego was too big, as always! I got my way! Shortly after this, Mr. Execution comes out and asks me if he can move to Hawaii with me when I go back… he had saved enough money and wanted me to get him out there and show him around… I eventually came out and told him he could not live WITH ME, but could go out there with me and find his own place ONLY IF he could pin the Ninja’s shoulders to the ground for a 30 second count, since the theme of the day was 30 vs. 30! Ex of course went on to win that match, with slight difficulty, and win his trip to paradise! And up next was the Hospital Match between two Legendary 30 Year Olds! Psycohol and Wolfman X… 30 years old, but still in their prime as far as I’m concerned! It was a hella violent match, with weapons galore, and bloody all over both our faces! Crimson masks only heightened the carnage! In the end, WMX Blitzkrieged me a record 12 times, before shoving me in the back of his car! Somehow, I don’t even recollect myself… somehow I managed to pop the hood open, you could see on video I was confused and don’t even remember doing it, but I did, and WMX dragged me out and gave me 2 more Blitzkriegs(Blitzkriegs are Powerbombs if ya can’t remember)! He went for #15, but I Frankensteined out of it! I bought a little time, but I had already spent my last dime! He got up, gave me the 15th Blitzkrieg, the new record, beating the 10 he gave Natas at one show awhile back, and threw me in the car… he drove me up to the hospital and handed me to a couple of nurses that happened to be passing by, and they took me in… WMX won the match, and after some much needed recovery in the hospital, I went back and wish WMX a friendly goodbye(since it was a friendly match), with stitches all up in my head, and flew back to Hawaii….. with Mr. Ex and Splooge of course… I didn’t win that battle, but I did help prove that WMX and I are as insane as ever, no matter what our age! Let’s see what happens in 10 more years, when we hit 40…… the quality may drop a little by then… but who knows, maybe we’ll surprise everyone and have an even better one!
So obviously by this point, the EWA was in a downward spiral at this point of what it once was, but this time I’m not gonna blame it on myself leaving, or them being Lazy or lay any guilt on anyone…. In fact, as much as we never wanted to admit it a few years earlier, Humans are stuck in this system of growing up, getting jobs, wives, kids, and getting old, and there’s nothing we can do about it! Before this show I just mentioned above, it had been about a year and a half since the EWA was having regular shows, and as of writing this right now, it looks like it’s never gonna be that way again. Now yes, that is sad, when I look back on how we used to get together every weekend and do this… but what can ya do? Wolfman X had one kid at this point, Austin, he had a full-time job, I was in Hawaii, with 2 jobs and a girlfriend, everyone else from the EWA and PXW were in basically the same boat… that’s Life…. I’ll come back to it at another time though, since I am not quite done yet with my story…
So yeah, the EWA had ONE show while I was gone for the next year and some, where the most crucial thing that happened was basically WMX vs. X-Loco in an X vs. X match where WMX won, keeping the X in his name, leaving X-Loco to drop his X, simply becoming known as “Loco” from then on. Anyways, I did make my return in late 2010 where Wolfman X and I made up this hilarious plot to Trick everybody, since Halloween was coming up! You can watch the shows on tape to see how the whole plot unravels, but basically I dressed up as Dr. Evil and said I was bringing the dead back to life or something, and bringing the Wolfman, Frankenstein, and the 2 Gorillas back to life, who have all Died over the EWA’s existence, to wreak havoc on the Federation. All the monsters attacked Superstars the next couple shows, and even fought each other a bit, only to have it revealed at the end of the 2 shows that it was all a trick, and myself and WMX played them the whole time with masks on! So Trick or Treat mutha$#@&as! Anyways, besides that whole bit of fun, the actual shows were “eh” quality… besides appearing as the monsters, and in a couple skits, I only fought the Ninja in the first show(dubbed Universal Horror Show 2010)… being that this is a crappy way for Psycohol to return, I made it interesting by making it similar to the 30 vs. 30 move match that WMX and I had a year earlier, but instead made it a 20 vs. 3 match… so if Ninja could hit his 3 moves before I could hit my 20, he would win! Made it a little more fare, seeing as he sucked… anyways, I hit my 20 moves before he could land his 3rd and took the match relatively easy… problem I had with it, after watching it on video later, is that my Corkscrew Plancha was cut out! Some people didn’t believe I landed all 20 moves since they didn’t see it on video! So I was gonna make up for this at the next show!
Cut forward to the next show! Halloween Hell! Yes our first True Halloween Show where many of us dressed up as characters! WMX came out as a New York Yankee…….. but not wearing a uniform, just Yankee shirt and hat and… and… basically what he wears to every show anyways! C’mon buddy! I come out decked out as the frickin’ Ultimate Warrior, my Wrestling Icon! Shirt off, 80’s rocker-wig, face-paint, streamers on my arms! I was the Warrior! Snorting and shooting Warrior-isms this way and that! Anyways, the Warrior challenged Ninja right off the bat to a Corkscrew Plancha match in revenge for the last show’s camera-work! The 1st to three Corkscrew Planchas wins, and I knew damn well the Ninja couldn’t even do one! So the match is on, and I whoop the Ninja in less that 2 minutes probably, Planchas everywhere! Done! Next match of the Event, wait, I come out again, Warrior Wig off, but still some facepaint… and who am I facing? Loco?! Uh oh! I don’t think I was expecting to face this big man! Okay, he’s lost a lot of weight and is no longer the behemoth he once was, but he is still big TO ME! Anyways, we have a classic match like our previous ones, with his tossing me all over the yard like yesterday’s trash, but some high-flying maneuvers by myself at the same time! But after going back and forth for awhile, I land a Moonsault from the Table, followed by my standing Psyco Backflip and pin him for the win! Still got it! Splooge then goes through a whole Gauntlet of People, including women and children I believe upon reintroducing his Loserweight Title, and retains it all until he unexpectedly beats Ninja, passing it off to him! The twist was that for Halloween they dressed up as each other, so we had a Big Splooge, and a skinny Ninja, it was funny! After that, we had a “Monster Rumble” for Halloween consisting of 10 Backyard Superstars! I came in 7th, and ended up defeating Face and Ninja from the lineup, before Loco got his revenge on me and finished me… Loco went on to win the Rumble, but eh, whatevs, been there, done that…. Sorta... at the end of the show, we were supposed to have a Survivor Series type match, but with some no-shows we had to cancel, and instead myself and WMX come out saying the DOE will take on anybody in a Tag Match! Out from the back come two Unknowns that we’ve never seen before! In their EWA and Backyard Wrestling Debuts, Malice and Pyro come out! Two guys that happened to come and watch the show wanted in on it! This was their first time ever Backyard Wrestling and they did okay! They gave us a little bit of a fight, but c’mon, we’re a Tag Team of Legends, the Doctors of Extreme really had no way to lose! After a decent brawl, WMX locked the Demolition Device on one of those two guys, and I leaped with the elbow, the pin, and the win! DOE for the win! And as of writing this bit of my autobiography, this was the last wrestling match I have taken part in…
After this show, things get a little scary… a couple months later, just before the New Year of 2011, WMX got a severe stomach pain, and with his girlfriend(and old high-school sweetheart Frankie, back together again), he heads to the Hospital to see whats going on. Like it REALLY hurt! They found a gall-stone inside his Pancreas, which is apparently VERY DANGEROUS! Apparently they put him under and got the stone out, but this journey was far from over! Frankie informed me about what was going on, knowing I was one of his best friends on this planet earth, and I thought about nothing but WMX and prayed for him to get better! Apparently it only got worse after the stone was out, building liquid somewhere inside him, and he was put “under”, to sleep for weeks upon weeks, almost like a coma, but drugged! Apparently it would hurt him too much to be awake for this, so they kept him under, and I felt nothing but helpless in Hawaii, not knowing what I could do, wishing I could get back there to see him! But Frankie kept me updated as much as she could, and I kept calling… at one point they had to breath for him through a machine, he couldn’t on his own, and was in Critical Condition! WMX was soon to wake up, but be very weak. I was hoping for the best! A week or 2 later I went on a hike up the ridge I fought the Hiker Dude on for EWA100, and was thinking I’d give Frankie a call to check on WMX… and when she passed the phone to WMX himself and I got to talk with him for a few minutes, I felt so much relief! My friend WMX was on the slow road to recovery! Anyways, throughout the whole ordeal, WMX lost like 50 pounds!!! People I talked to from home who’ve seen him said he looked much thinner! I couldn’t imagine it! Over the next few months WMX had to be going in and out of the hospital for some internal bleeding, and to remove some of his Pancreas and Gall Bladder, etc., and he’s had had it much rougher in this short time=period than in his whole EWA Career! He now has to prick his finger with a needle before he eats every meal, and cannot eat certain things, almost Diabetic with the loss of so much of his Pancreas! I am so thankful my DOE partner is better and doing well again! When I came home that following November, he had gotten some of his weight back, but looked thinner than I remembered for sure! We hung out, we did NOT wrestle, we ate pizza! We had a mutual understanding that there would be no wrestling this time, we never even brought it up! What’s important is that he stays okay! I want WMX to become stable and never get back to that state he was a year earlier! He’s one of the most important friends I have, despite the differences we may have shared in the yard many times, and I can’t afford to lose him! WMX and Psycohol will always be brothers!
Welp….. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but for the 1st time EVER since I started writing this Autobiography back in the…. Hmm when did I start this thing, the late 1990’s? Early 2000’s?! I’m not even sure, definitely between 10 and 15 years ago…. Anyways, I was going to claim how this was the 1st time Time I’ve ever caught up to where I am currently in life, but after breezing through some of my earlier Autobio, I realize I have already said this a few years ago, so we'll call this the second time I have caught up to current day! No more playing catch-up on this Autobiography, it IS once again current, finally! You may notice when reading it an Evolution of my writing over the years, maybe certain times when I wrote in one way, and other times when I wrote another way… maybe sometimes when I skimmed things down, and others when I go into more detail… there’s some OLD stuff from the early PXW to the BTVW which I haven’t read or thought about in years, but have written down somewhere amongst these pages… this is my Backyard Wrestling History, and I have NOT read it in full EVER as I type this, but hope to re-read my past eras with a smile someday soon! I may cringe at my writing skills at times, or even re-edit them, but the memories encapsulated will forever bring out a nostalgic smile… and bring sadness at the same time, as they will never happen again and lie in my past! I have had many friends and many enemies throughout the years in this World, many feuds, many fun and silly times, many places traveled around Upstate New York. This paragraph may sound like a conclusion to this enormously long story(originally I intended on maybe a few short pages on my career, little did I know how long this would end up), but it is NOT. If there is wrestling in the future, you can bet this paragraph will be followed by another… and another… and another…. But for this moment, it is a Conclusion… I am now almost 33 years old, and started wrestling when I was 17 I believe, in the Norwich High School Wrestling Room in Norwich, New York, with my longtime friend Wolfman X, Geoff Parker… I am Psycohol, real name Eric Welch(1st and only time ever revealed on this website)… it’s been over 15 years now since this story began, almost half my life. I hope it continues. I know the Golden Days of the EWA are behind us, for me it ended when I moved to Hawaii… I made that jump, knowing my life was about to change forever… I never moved back to New York… when I left, I thought I’d be back in a couple years, and I never did… not yet… if you hadn’t noticed, I’ve been starting to write mini-conclusions between many of my recent shows in this story, because I have been reminiscing of some good times that I wish to hell I could re-live… I could extend this paragraph and all of the feelings I have towards my Wrestling Career and every single one of my brothers from my REAL brother Psycometer, to the countless Yard brothers from WMX to Natas, Drakon, Lumberjack, Psykadelik, Drixon, Disruptor, Loco and many others; but I am going to stop at the moment and call this an End for now… I don’t know if or when Wolfman X will be ready to wrestle again ever with his current condition, and I know he is the ONE link I still have to this Wrestling world… all the other guys have moved on with their lives and dropped out… they will never forget no doubt, and all have fond memories of these days, but they are no longer down to put on shows or wrestle with their aging bones I doubt. With Wolfman X, I always knew I could get my “wrestle” on when I came home to New York… Now I no longer know if I even have that! If he can wrestle again in the future, I think that’s great for his progress after the many surgeries he had, and would be an awesome site! If he cannot and has to call it quits, then that is how it was meant to be. I feel my bones getting older too. I feel as young as ever, but my knees are definitely the one thing I can feel some strain on after all these years. But that wouldn’t stop me from an occasional battle back in the EWA Arena if the chance ever came up! EWA4Life is my code and Wolfman X’s code! We claimed we would never stop wrestling til we’re 80, but you know EWA4Life is more than just Wrestling! It is in my blood, I bleed EWA and PXW… will this story continue? I don’t know, but I don’t think this will be the last paragraph you ever see me write. You just check back and see! It may be in a year, or 2 years, or maybe 5… but I’m sure this story isn’t quite to it’s end yet! Psycohol signing out… for now!
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