Turing and crashing I sort though the thick and thin. Joining webs of intricate thought, waves of love, washing over my body. I see the starlight beaches and wonder; What is behind these score eyes?
I still can?t Sleep.

It?s the best feeling in the world when people can still surprise you.
Lindsay sent me chocolates in the mail today, it was so unexpected. (I must be getting to skinny or ?small? jk) can wait to go home and hold her.
On other things, life?s been crappy this week. Tests coming up, depressing thoughts, horrible projects assigned. I cant wait to get home, give her a kiss and fade away.

Memories consume
Like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume
I'm safe here in my room
[Unless I try to start again]

I don't want to be the one
The battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize
That i'm the one confused

I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
Tonight

-Linkin Park-

Going Blind
Convulsing and lack of sleep, keep my mind stale.
If I slept would I wake up different? I can?t eat, I can?t sleep I can?t think.

When you receive pain you can still sleep.
When you cause pain, you cannot sleep.

Like I have no since of extreme ideals.

let us last forever
Some times it feels go good to know you share problems with some one.
I cried on the phone with Lindsay tonight. I felt so much better now that I know how she feels. We are both sad about the situation. We both KNOW we are in love, and we will keep going on strong. I was scared that we might not have problems, how relived I am to say we have something to work towards.
Every thing she does makes me feel so wonderful

When we sit down she rests her head on my neck.

She all ways reaches for my hand, and cringes slightly when she know we have to let go for a second.

She tex mgs me whenever she randomly thinks of me.

Falls asleep in my arms, and dreams of staying in them.

She so strong,
Stronger than me
Because of her, we will last forever, because she is perfect, so caring, so loving.
I pray that in time I will see all the love she gives to me.
Its good to be alive.

I spent 3 days in constant contact with people this weekend, finally on Sunday they all leave and I get a chance to be by myself. Its nice to relax, but o so depressing to live by myself. Reality hit me hard this afternoon. I called Lindsay immediately, I was wonderful to finally talk to her for a good undisturbed hour. Yet it made me so sad, I knew I had to get off, and go back to my box that is my home. I was able to keep busy this weekend and keep active so I would not miss her as badly. Then when I ran out of things to do. It all caught up.

But im doing better, talking to lin is all ways the highlight of my day. When I hear her voice, all my worries just go away.

Girl, it's been a long time that we've been apart
Much too long for a man who needs love
I miss you since I've been away
Babe, it wasn't easy to leave you alone
It's getting harder each time that I go
If I had the choice, I would stay

There's no one like you
I can't wait for the nights with you
I imagine the things we'll do
I just wanna be loved by you

Girl, there are really no words strong enough
To describe all my longing for love
I don't want my feelings restrained
Ooh, babe, I just need you like never before
Just imagine you'd come through this door
You'd take all my sorrow away

There's no one like you
I can't wait for the nights with you
I imagine the things we'll do
I just wanna be loved by you

(No One Like You)- THE SCORPIONS

It crazy this morning, when i woke up this song was playing on the radio. it made me so sad, these weeks apart get harder each time.
Well getting ready for the big LAN party this weekend. my bud mikes, coming down from H-town, Rock?n.
looks like, Drinking, CPU's, and Exams on Monday, too much funny for Morgan.

Friction & Fantasy
I had one of the most fulfilling weekends of my life. I never dreamed it was possible to love some one this much. I found a hold new level of devotion. She seems to love sleeping in my arms. (practically any chance she gets) I love being there. Long days, and wild nights filled my time. So much laughter, so much enjoyment. You?d think me a liar when I say ? I remember every single kiss.? Its not hard, each is the same. Passion, devotion, and love, each time. So much love fills my memories. I cried when I left. The word love, holds no meaning now, we are beyond what words can describe.

13 Moons
?The future is now, forget the past, the presents gone,
until the gorgeous night.
Outrages mind-blowing nightmares end up in the never ending fight.?

Things are going great now that I?ve fully embraced the responsibly that is collage. I seem to do everything. Work, Homework, staying fit. I have every thing, nice life style, good friends, and a Loving girlfriend. I some how am now able to balance it all. My feelings of emptiness must only pour from an extensive schedule. Every thing is done for me or predicated, not much room for Random adventures. Is this what growing up feels like? Finally accepting the pattern that is society, or is it being able to balance all things I want in life perfectly together? No mater for I am happy.

Become one with the Night, Like a child born under the moon. Wild
I Burn.

Warriors Dance
Scared of beatings and physical toxins.
Scared of life and broken segments.
No reasons for fevered skin,
No reasons for corrupted foreplay.
No wounds, no marks = No memory.
Mercy?


I can not change the fact that its not coming back.
Still we move on to life?s uncertain beat,
Clean diligent and precise.
Until the end when we last meet.
We all pay the final price.

Must we wait until the end of our days
to see the error in our ways?