Cold
So sad would my words be now, now in this moment of excitement, and total denial. I can feel the light, but can never see it. It would be blinding if I lashed out and stepped forth right now. I could show my arms, and bare an admiration. Then wait for any acceptance. Pity me to find the open flame that needs nothing more to burn. No kinder, no parchment, no warmth. Burn she will, and smolder shall I. O my dreams end now. this night; I too will admire the choice. So cold. I must live with the joke at my side. Laugh and it hurts, cry and ill find only desperation. With out laughter, with out emotion there is nothing. So cold to be alone.

Why does the past haunt one so. Nightmares & Visions. Ideas and better ways that will make it right. I know I?ve changed. Wait, what was the real reason. It is so Dam HARD to lie to your self, when you never knew the truth. Yet we try, o god we try. And Still we catch ourselves mid-moment. If you scare your face, it betters your Ego. Why can?t we let go? I guess we can never give up on a chance for happiness. Truly said and falsely revered. Happiness Lasts Forever in Memory, Yet is Forgotten in a Life Time.
?I?m afraid to hurt you.? Well fuck. 2 years you say, how could i forget ?Hey people can change.? But people forget. You forget why it stopped. Or just claim you never knew. I know why it started. but Did I ever know? yet my heart still dose crave. ?I want it back.? But we know its wrong. My hear is as cold, Cold and Empty. Empty like the moonlight that shines on this page.

Dignity
The passions that drive use should be the ones we repeat, and admire. But to feel shame for our own motivations is such a vulgar thing.
Your not making any sense again. Clean this crap up.
That crap use to be a man. His face makes my eyes weep.
but I feel the great smile on my face, check to check. Almost as big as the cut I lay to his throat.
Shut up. Why did this man have to die?
He was going to hurt you. They all want to hurt you.
You don?t know that. This is murder. If you think that, your just as cold as the moon light that shines on this knife. Who are you to decide. Will this fate seek all that appose you?
Sure, their all helpless walking sacks of meat. If they cant defend themselves, then so be it. I am Strong.
No I am Empty, there is no Reasoning for this Motive. Where?s the dignity in it. That man kept his pride. This is... This is shameful, that man at least had some form of ambition. There is Dignity in that corpse
Dignity!! Is that what?s this is about. All right Quit you bitching. What good is dignity, look what dignity has gotten him. A red collared shirt.
Look to his eye?s He?s got pride. That?s something you can?t have. He will keep that in his heart forever
Not if I cut it out first.
at least I know better than to simply assume a complete justification for my actions?
Is that what this world looks for? Pride. People die every day. Weather they die old in bed, or with my icy hands rapped round their throat. The final coarse is served the same. Ha! And what about dignity. I keep telling my little sappy speech to Mr. Jon-Dow
He?s still dead. I killed him
No, no I didn?t
Theirs Bloods In my hands.
I still need a cause. What is my creed?
Dam it, have I not been listening to have pride, to have dignity, in this hell forsaken world is to be dead.
Exactly

Keep Smiling. Till the end of days, I?ll bide my time. Look forward, Away from conflict. 3 moons have risen, 3 left to fall, 12 to relapse my better days. Improve your self. Empathy has no room for Ambition. Yet careers are Made from this vary Farce. How do you get to Haven? Step 1. Die?

Mr. Happy
Would I die a 1,000 times to her your voice once more. Will I give up, or give in. damn this. Humans are week. It?s Emotion. I can?t let go, I want to. I cry and I bleed, still I remember. Scares and self-mutilations, still I feel such sorrow. Damn your Pretty face. That Face that haunts my dreams. Damn the memories that won?t let me sleep to night. Damn my heart for falling in love. And Fuck the past for teaching lesions I shall never learn. I want her so? but not bye force. I want her acceptants. I want to make her laugh, and live only with a smile. I want to hear her sing to me, with no words and only heart. I wish to rest my head, and fall to her presence. I wish to wake midmorning to a kiss upon my lips. I want to right wrongs. I wish to Grow with age, and fade with beauty. Wish to this night, that I might cry to her arms. But I Truly wish to be free of her.

A Dieing Sunset
A Dieing sunset, and fading dreams.
Your ideas; gone, losing all hope and memory.
What was my devotion, who can I love. Love yourself. Fuck that.
Others must love? NO
One other, one more other must love.
I need one other.
More time to spend, more poems to write,
great Memories to Lose. Victories and Battle scares.
More of a cost, more Pain.
More nights of Blood filled Eyes, more Tears?
Regrets, misunderstandings. More love.
More People.
More Lust & less Sex.
More Devotion & less Commitment.
More Love & no Regrets.
More Answers & less Reasons.
More time, always more time. And better ways to Love
A Need to under stand Love.

Surface Thoughts
Why dose the past haunt one so. Nightmares & Visions. Ideas and new ways you think up that will make it right. I know, I?ve changed; wait, what was the real reason. Its hard to lie to your self, when you never knew the truth. Yet we try, o god we try. And yet we catch ourselves mid-moment. Hands rapped round the receiver. Stop. Why can?t we let go? I guess we can never give up on a chance for happiness. ?I?m afraid to hurt you.? Well fuck. Been stuck in my head 18 moons. I know the night of the 2nd year. ?2 years? you say, ?Hey people can change.? But people forget. You forget why it stopped. Or just claim you never knew. ?Did I ever know?? yet my heart still dose crave. ?I want it back.? But it?s wrong to think that. Its cold, much like the moonlight that shines on this page. Much like my heart.

Sound For Compassion
In lovers Eyes, I?ve seen a few.
To Hearts that dance and sing for you.
I lost my youth, in loves quarrel and compassion.
Still I rant and rave, and I Think with out action.
To love, is too late, with this I will seal a future fate.
Your hand and mine, and love that grows
Soon or forever? Will I never know.
Still I rest uneasy. Assured in my self, yet I fall queasy.
To live my life speaking in rhyme.
I watch are fates. With good interest and good in time.
Still I Need you, words I speak so few.
But Behind that meaning is my undying love for you.
Still I ponder and draw pictures that seam bleak.
I will forever know that you are the one I seek.
I will triumph, I will enjoy, and speak of lasting love.
Ill be their always guarding and ever watchful; Standing from above.
To call my name in a joy, I can?t relate.
Your love and mine still shares a bond, this within our trait.
I love you girl, and you to me.
Please remind my of this thing I know to be;
its means so much to me
To hear your love, and to be so true.
Its means so much; If you only knew.
I will forever love you.

Martyrdom
Ok? Make a list of the things you would give up to push the world back from a total Dooms Day. If its starts with your life and includes your soul, you might be a Martyr. Martyrs are known to sacrifice their futures for a cause, or an act of pure empathy they believe in. You will receive your greatest happiness in life, from receiving pain, punishment, or agony in place of another. And not because we feel our life is worthless, But Because we cant stand to see others suffering, and we shall do any thing to stop it. That?s what it means to be a Martyr?

Ride That Flag Pole
So let me get this straight. ok 1 or 2 planes go down, and they make a once in a life time landing. Thus a great BOOM in America Merchandise. Every Joe somebody?s got there 3?x 5? Flag bumper sticker. I?m sorry but WTF! Really, a year goes by, and I just know one thing; I wasted 7 hours at work Reposting all this I Love America bull shit. Moving and Marking down boxes and boxes of Patriotic Glamour. I ask you this, Dose a bigger Flag mean more Patriotism? or I?m a better American? Think about that next time you see Buba Cruzing down the Hwy. With His 10? Flag pole, Flaring stars and stripes along the road. Don?t you wish you could be that Patriotic? This Reminds me time and time again. You can?t cure Retarded... with that said, Ignorance is Bliss. Now days you can get all your Flags, T-shirts, and Stickers, at half price. Cause Patriotism is no longer in style.