Book Review - How Tough Could It Be?

When I got the review copy of How Tough Could It Be by Austin Murphy, I liked the snazzy cover of a man in apron holding a mop and a soapy frying pan. Timed to come out in time for Fathers day, the publisher probably figured the cover alone would snag a bunch of moms and moms-in laws to buy a copy as a quick gift and a nice spike in their Amazon Rating. The premise of the book looked great too: Austin Murphy lives the rush-rush life of a writer for Sports Illustrated and takes off 6 months from his job and switches places with his wife (so she can live a similar rush-rush life) to care for his 2 young kids.

The first thing that surprised me was that his kids were both going to grade school during his six month "Experiment". To be honest, I'm not sure what's so amazing about staying home for 6 months with two kids who are in elementary school.

OK, I read on, maybe the book will be ?laugh out loud funny? as the book flap says. I am still waiting to hear him talk about his kids, but it sounds like he has more problems with his wife than his kids. He starts by making you wade through pages after page of his wife's allergies to certain foods, and the elaborate recipes to please her taste. The book then turns into a venting tool telling us that his wife Laura doesn't notice his cleanup chores (he even has to clean the house for the house cleaners who come to his house 12 times during his 6 month stint). The I-don?t?get respect whining continues throughout the book ad nauseam. When she finally gives thanks for making dinner he remarks "It seems like a lot of work for six words of praise." Later in the book his wife, accurately reflecting his thoughts says "...You're feeling the resentment that ninety-five percent of moms feel every day, where you think to yourself, "It's like I do every f-----g thing here"

OK? I?m still waiting to hear about his kids, but he wanders off even more by writing about the Iraq war, even filling the pages with a transcript of Secretary Ridge's directives on what to do due to the latest terrorism warnings.

When he finally writes something about his kids I felt I was reading a screenplay for a TV Family sitcom, you know the predictable half hour night time numbing sessions that get Cancelled after a few episodes. For example, he writes of his "adventures" with his kids during a disastrous trip to Las Vegas, where the only good time the kids have is watching the same Harry Potter Movie 3 times in their hotel room at the Flamingo. Even ice cream sundaes turn the kids into a catastrophic tantrum as they didn?t get sprinkles. Or there?s the expensive birthday party (which he prepares for 6 weeks) for his daughter celebrated at a climbing gym. He spends $22.50 for 9 custom invitations, $214 for an "American Girl" Dollhouse (plus $35 to have it express mailed), $25 for an "Art Kit", $180 to use the climbing gym, and $70.00 for plates and cups and "treat bags" That?s $546.45 so far not including the $20 worth of candy bars he grabs because the girls are "starving" before they have their cake. (The last birthday party I had for my son, his friends played in the back yard, had cake & ice cream, and a few presents. Jesus, doesn't anyone do that any more?)

Contrary to the title of his book, he finally admits how easy he has it, "I'm still no more than a day-tripper, an actor immersing himself into a role. I?m not a real mother, but I play one on TV."

I will applaud his efforts to volunteer several times for his kid?s schools, something that dads need to do more often. One event was a variety show which came out so well that he finally gets his long sought after praise from the mothers - praise that he had so much trouble getting from his wife.

Not recommended: If you want something "Laugh out loud funny" for Father?s Day get Dave Barry's "Complete Guide to Guys? If you want something written with passion about their kids, get Samual Osherson's "The Passions of Fatherhood" (one cent on Amazon!).