Everythings falling together nicely.
I was having one of those quiet thinks to myself as I was painting this morning, somewhere between the hours of 2 and 3 am, when I came to realize, everyones doing pretty well now.

Trent's got himself a girl that I was hopeing he would fall for and with the charm and charisma that is Trent, how could she resist? Trent's now going to a new school which is pretty amazing realy, starting all over again realy but its probley for the best.

Mason's got his last year of school ahead of him, we all know he'll get the grades that he deserves and I'm sure we'll see his technological advancements throw us into a new age of darkness, in which we are slave to robot. He's got his ex girlfriend coming down from Brisbane to see him which would be a pretty big deal for those two, they haven't seen each other in ages. Though I would constantly give her shit over anything and everything, I wouldn't have done it unless I didn't think she'd have some quick comeback, she was definitely smarter than the average bear.

Josh's starting a new job soon which'll be good, even if it doesn't last, he's got an attractive young girl who adores him to look forward to as well, even if he is unsure of everything. I'm sure those two will work things out for the best.

Then there's me realy, I've got my course in "Fine Arts" to look forward to which I'll start soon enough. I'm moving out very soon to the big city of Brisbane, all on my lonesome, which I think is going to be realy cool. It's always good to know that your perants are supporting your decisions and my perants still support me on this, even though I think its just so they can party and get drunk every night whilst listening to urban funk music. More importantly than all that is my new girlfriend, whom I love and adore. Hopeing to see her a whole lot more once I move as I will be alot closer to where she lives. Unfortunately is difficult to spend great quantities of time with her as we have to dance around past arrangements, camps, reluctant mothers, distance, etc etc etc but I would rather see her for a few minutes than not at all and I love being with her.

When everything falls into place so well, I think that my prayers are answered, that my selfless desire to protect those I love and care about have been fulfilled. But then again, if my prayers have been answered, why is Nikki Webster still around and why does that chick on "today tonight" still talk like that?

New Artwork
More Artwork in the art section of the website now.
PLEASE leave some constructive feedback people.
Thanks.

Fucking ignorant bitch
My goodness,
Its shocking to watch just how stupid some people are. A woman smuggles pot into Bali, gets caught and expects sympathy, I've got news for you bitch, the last bit of human contact your going to get on this earth is the firing squads lethal touch. Not only does she deserve death for smuggling in pot but she deserves the most sever death available for spouting off such stupid lines as " It's like the legal system is against me". Your fucking right its against you, your a fucking criminal.

Her father is just as bad with his great one liners like "What ever happened to "Guilty until proved innocent" ? " , well dick head, that may apply here but Bali has its own fucking rules that your stupid daughter agreed to when she put her first footstep down on there soil, she fucked up, not there legal system.

I end this article with a note, in my most Christian of pleads I ask god to send this bitch straight to hell. Hopefully one of the lowest levels that are generally reserved for such people as librarians and parking meter inspectors.

NEW ARTWORK
Yep, check out my artpage people, heaps of new artwork, 2 pages of it. Leave a comment and tell me what you all think.

Thanks All.

How Lucky Am I ???
Not sure If anyone has read my post about my "date" ( then again I'm not sure if anyone realy reads what I write) .

Well, needless to say, that night went well but the next day was even better. She had told me that she had broken up with her boyfriend. "Great" I thought " I'll have to ask her out next weekend". Later on that day I got a text message from her. The text message read " Will you go out with me?" . I was shocked, someone had beaten me to the punchline. A wise person once said " If you hesitate its probably not the right thing to do" ( maybe I'm the one who made this up, who knows ) This wasn't even a decision, I already knew my answer and its realy the only one I could give to a girl that I got along with so easily and who I found to be naturally beautiful with blue eyes that made me weak.

I rang her up and gave her my answer, as soon as I got of the phone I ended up prancing around the room like a 6 year old and had a massive smile on my face that made my parents suspicious of substance abuse.

Well, there you go, Jamie's got a girlfriend, this calls for a good drinking party and a cowboy costume.

wow! That was a scary 12 hours!
Not sure if anyone but myself noticed but the "My Storys" page was down yesterday due to some strange error on angelfire.com.

All is well now, atleast Ive learnt my leason about backing up all your material. Good thing its working now because I would have just deleted the site otherwise, theres no way I was about to type up 15000 words all over again.

Sites back up but maybe thats not a good thing.

Just got back from Brisbane.
Its the early hours of the morning now but I cant help writing about my night.

I was feeling rather depressed, as one does after your've taken a few to many blows to your trust and faith in people, when all of a sudden, a friend of mine invites me out. I've always had a thing for this girl, even if she did dye her hair from its natural blonde color to a few different shades of brown.

I tried not to get my hopes up about the night, maybe it was just a friendly gesture? Before I knew it I had found my way into the cinema's with her and 2 of her friends. We saw "Elecktra" which has rekindled new levels of hatred for motion pictures that I haven't felt since pirates of the Caribbean, yer yer, everyone loves that movie but I don't OK?!.

I sat there, enduring the horrible story lines, acting and suspense in this movie, trying to find the right moment to see if this was more than a friendly invite. The moment seemed right, I quickly reminded myself who I was and what I've accomplished before and make the first move of holding her hand. Sure, sounds lame but its easier to have someone move there hand away than have them turn their head when you try to kiss them. She didn't move her hand away but rather, held my hand back. "Yessss" I thought and leant in and kissed her. She didn't resist and returned the gesture.

The movie (FINALY!) ended ( IT WAS LIKE GETTING your WHISTS CUT ) and we all left the cinemas. She had to catch a bus home and I offered to walk her to her bus stop and wait around till it arrived. On the way there we began to talk about different things. I wasn't sure about her and her ex, seemed like a difficult situation which was rather intimidating. She informed me that "He's a wanker but were not technically broken up" . "My god!" I thought, I've hooked up with a chick thats got a boyfriend by all technical definitions". That was a swift blow to my morals there and I wondered if I'd act the same way if i knew this little detail before hand.

We continued our walk and I asked her "Do you have feelings for me or am I just a random? ". "I have feelings for you" she told me after toying around with the question. "YESSS" I thought to myself. "Do you like me?" she asked. Like she had done I toyed around with the question before answering " how could I not?" I said to her. She gave a soft yet excited "yay!" in response.

Her bus was about to leave and I took off my leather band with spikes, I placed it around her wrist, she objected " no, realy... " she started. I cut her off " don't worry, Just look after it for me till I see you next weekend" . She seemed to agree and I finished strapping it on.

Her bus left and so did she. I ran across the street with a vigor that only total acceptance of the opposite sex does.

Depression no more, welcome back to life Jamie.

To Much Faith Part 2
We arrived at the restuarant. She had dressed herself up, radiating pure beauty and there was me, trying to do the best with the clothes I can brought realy.

Still, we had a nice night as we both enjoyed each others company. We chatted about whatever we could, trying to avoiding the subject of our feelings, whilst I did bring them up once, I quickly dropped it when I saw the tears swelling up.

By the end of our meal we had decided to would be nice to take a walk along the beach nearby but almost as we spoke this it began to rain. "Its only a light shower" I had commented but it was raining heavly. We walked out into the weather and within 5 seconds where drenched to our underwear. Well, that is, If I was wearing underwear. ( That was a joke... ) . We thought it would be best to retreat home and stood undercover whilst we waited for our lift, shivering all the while.

Eventualy we made it home. Arguing on the way there who's idea it was to take a walk in the rain. I quickly changed clothes and left to the temporary refuge of my room. Sleep didnt come easyly that night and it wasnt until the early hours of the morning did I find the relative solatute of sleep.

Woken early that morning by a crash tackle. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" she told me. "Happy birthday" I said back to her, still unaware it was my birthday.

After my breakfast of coffee and coffee, we left and went to the local mall to spend my birthday chillin' around the centre. We caught a movie and got my hair dyed bright red. The whole time she seemed very distant, catching her starting into nothingness half the time. That night we were both sitting her room. I was idlely drawing and she was reading her new book. I went and sat at the end of her bed, thinking how pathetic I am and said to her " Its my birthday, will you give me one birthday wish? "
"Of course she replied"
"All I want if for you to kiss me then say that we cant be together, that your not strong enough for this to work"
Tears began to roll down her face as she stared deeplying into my eyes.
"I dont want to hurt you" she told me
"I'd more hurt if you didnt, if I left here not doing everything I could"
She learnt in and kissed me and I kissed her back. Most people would define romance with rose petals on red velvet sheets, I would define it as that moment in time, where it seemed as though all emotion was being shown in a simple gesture, something Ive shared with many people but I seemed to only find the true meaning of it then.

She broke away. Tears streaming down her face yet still she composed herself without breaking down into a horrible mess. "Im sorry, I cant" she said.

I stayed that night and left the next day. She came to the trainstation with me to say goodbye, we hugged and I went through the turnstyles. I tried with all my physical strength as I could not to look back but my heart thought otherwise, I turned back and mouthout " I love you" . She just looked back as I left.

Thats life, my life atleast.

See? Nothing stays horribley despressing for long..... if your me.
Home for 24 hours and I'm already invited out by a lovley girl. How lucky.

My theory that " Things never stay bad for long" is in full effect as always. Just when I think everything is fucked someones there to give me a helping hand out of my own little world of self-depressing thoughts. Theres nothing like an attractive girl to make your world chirp with the sounds of birds and clear away those clouds that were starting to look as though they were never going to fuck off.

and yes " fuck off" is a better expression to use than "clear away"

If you dont believe me then clear away.

Back in QLD
Yep, back in QLD.

Kinda glad to be back , away from alot of painful memories. Away from alot of good memories as well tho.
Hard to say which is better realy. Well, Its still nice to be back, back in my familiar surroundings of my room. Theres something relaxing about laying on your own bed. Maybe its just the people that relax me so much? I probably just need someone to give me a hug, Hanna used to be there for those, seems like such a long time ago that we used to call each other "Darling" in a rather British accent, with our chins held high and greeted each other with a hug. Now theres no-one like that . *sigh*.

Maybe I need a hug? Maybe the drugs just haven't kicked in yet?

YOU CANT FIRE ME! I QUIT!
Yep, finally, Jamie was left ( under his own free will) his job.

I cant stand people that arnt honest. ( But Jamie... what about all those things you did at work? ) They were supposed to pay me for my last week of work but didn't so I quit. I was nice enough to make my resignation phone call 2 days after I was supposed to be there. Very Nice of me indeed.
Phone conversation went something like this :

Jamie : good morning! Just calling to say that I hate you all and I quit, you never pay me on time and you wonder why I'm not at work!?
Work : But Jamie.. its a problem with the bank and....
Jamie : shut up, I quit, later days.

Jamie Lopez, world's greatest worker, signing out.

Im a fucking drifter
Yep, just been drifting around the state of NSW for 18 days now. Being in a different state is a great excuse to make up random story's and reinvent yourself.

I sat at Newcastle central station for a good few hours yesterday, waiting for my train to arrive. I took my sketch book out and tried to finish a few works in progress. I sat there in my own little world when someone said "Thats realy good!" I looked up to find an attractive young blonde staring back at me. "Thanks" I told her, trying to sound disinterested ( which I was). She sat down on the seat next to me and tried to start a civilized conversation with me.

Girl : So where are you off to?
Jamie: I'm going to gosford actually.
Girl : Realy? what are you doing there?
Jamie: Oh, I'm visiting my girlfriend, she has cancer and she's going into hospital today.
Girl : Oh my! Realy?!
Jamie: Yer, we've been going out for 6 years now.
Girl : (getting up now) Well, tell her that we all pray for her.
Jamie: Thank you.....

Made me laugh anyway

God told me quite specificaly not to drink
Well, I cant drink anymore.
But Jamie, you cant stop drinking? you'll put millions of people out of work!!!
I'm sorry But God told me not to drink.
I had a dream, I was out drinking one night and was raped by an attractive guy. God then showed himself in all glory and said quite specifically to me " Told you not to drink Jamie".

Well, thats to specific for me, thats basically god saying "Jamie, if you drink, your going to get raped by a guy". Well, currently thats not on my list of things to do so no drink for me. But this raises one question. Is the pain in the arse ( pun intended) worth the booze?

Then again, maybe god was trying to give me another message, maybe he's trying to say I'm gay? Personally Its not my thing but hey, "each to there own" a friend of mine used to say, wise beyond her own beliefs. Well, guess I have no choice but to give up the booze. FUCK! what am I supposed to spend my money on now?!

Morale of the story : Drinking gets you raped.

Movies.... I swear.....
Some movies just have the worst story lines you've've ever heard. A good example is that new movie about a racing zebra, honestly, it sounds as though they've smoked something hardcore and wrote down whatever came into there drugged induced minds, woke up the next morning and found the only legible words they wrote where "racing zebra".

That is the most fucking stupid idea Ive ever heard! Closely followed by the colossal fuck up they call "Blade Trinity". Sure, the action was good, I don't mind seeing a few vampires get there throats ripped out. The problem is the story line, you want to add a new character? But you don't want to make it coherent? Well, lets just say it was an old characters child. Good idea dumb fucks. Ive woken up hungover and blurted out better Ideas than these people ever will. Its almost painful to think about the storyline in blade. Whats ever more sad is that the blade series was so good, once again, much like "The matrix Revolutions", they fucked up something which was impossible to fuck up.

Good work Hollywood, whilst people are dying in you've own country, the general public is quite happy to pay $12 to see your bullshit and give it rave reviews.

Morale of the story : zebras used to be cool then Hollywood came along

Gotta Miss Newcastle
On the first day I went to Newcastle me and my friend decided to go for a drive, just to talk, listen to music, abuse people, the usual type of things teenage males do.

We were "lucky" enough to take a trip to "Islington". Great place to visit if you like whores, sluts or whorish sluts. Other than that theres not alot to do. We drove along the main street and what did I see? at 1:30 in the afternoon, there was a hooker workin it already. Jesus. Its like that old saying I guess, "The early hooker gets the best tricks". My friend thought it would be fun to ask her for a blow. Me being in the passenger seat told him quite frankly to " fuck off!". He ignored me and pulled over, waited for her to walk over and took off. Now if I was a whore ( one day Jamie, one day ) then wouldn't you just ignore ANY cars with a fucking P plate on the back window???

Oh well, I'm guessing that intellect was in short supply when your a hooker. Then again, mental handicaps never stopped those girls from getting a job a Maccas.

Prejudice? sexist? Ignorant? Jamie
Apparently I've got issues with women.

People believe this because I know that 99% of women ( give or take 1% ) on TV are whores.
Can anyone say I'm wrong tho? OK, you can SAY I'm wrong but that doesn't mean your right. In fact, It makes you wrong to such a degree its makes me break out in fits of giggles.

Look at them all, prancing around like a bunch of dressed up hookers but there no better. You sold your soul for money, your a fucking sell out, your bringing down society with every skimpy outfit ( seriously Janet Jackson, I dont want to see your nipple). With every Female to Female kiss your making young girls think its right to be total whores like you are. Your not just degrading yourself, your degrading ALL females.
Morale of this story : The only thing worse than a whore is a feminist.

Roll the dice.
My grandmother doesn't know it yet but she's making a rather large decision.

I want to go to a private school in my area this year. Problem is the cost of the school is around the $6000 mark. I've asked that the money be taken from my trust fund, money that is there for when I turn 18.

Weather or not I get this money is up to one person, my Grandmother.
If I get the money, then I go to this new school.
If I don't, then I'm moving away, I'm not sure where to yet but just away. Maybe to Perth or Melbourne? To Adelaide perhaps? Somewhere where no one knows me.

I can see it now, seducing young women for a place to sleep at night. Maybe I could be a mime? That looks like fun. Do you think I need a mime's uniform to be a mime? DO they have a union perhaps? How do you become a mime? Is there a course at uni? Maybe you have to be a mime's apprentice for a few years until you become "Qualified".

Or maybe I could be a one man band? That looks like a laugh. I'd worry that I'd need some sort of talent for music to be a one man band but it doesn't seem to stop any of them.

It all sounds like fun realy, we'll have to see what fate sends my way.

Morale of this rambling : Mimes are arseholes just like me

Guess Im a punk now....
I've lived in QLD for 4 years, during this time my taste in clothes, music, women, have all been greatly influenced by my friends for the better or worse. Guess Im abit of a sheep then arnt I?

4 years of work to make me what I am and only 2 weeks in NSW to destroy all that. Sitting here with bright red hair and a spiked braclet, that little voice in my head ( which sounds alot like Trent actualy ) keeps telling me that Im a punk and Im an arsehole for being so influenced by NSW in such a short time.

I'll even admit hardcore music doesnt sound so bad anymore and I'll even yell a few lines when its been played. AFI doesnt seem like such a pack of whining bitches either.

Oh well, for better or worse ( worse Jamie, very much worse ) Ive changed, such is the effect of friends and an entire state on a teenage lad.
Atleast my friends wont see my piercing....

A Thank You ( I know, it sounds strange to me to )
This is just a thanks to all the people that have been nice enough to let me sleep under there roof. If it wasnt for these people I would have lived in the streets for the 2 weeks Ive been in NSW now. But then again, I'd probley have some REALY good storys if I stayed in the streets. Tales of hookers and.... ummm.... drunk hookers I guess....

Well, regardless of the lack of hooker storys, Id like to say thanks to you all, much appreciated.

To Much Faith.
Again burnt by "Love"
Guess im just a fool for a pretty girl with promises. Haha, gotta watch out for that in the future. If your've come to read a pathetic story love and romance, keep reading.

Falling in love with a person you havent met before, sounds even more pathetic than the storylines that "The OC" has. Though, against my own logic it happend to me. I wont blame myself to much for it tho, I had a connection with her I havent shared in uncountable months and she was undoubtabley the most attractive person I've had the pleasure of meeting in my short life. I dont recall being more emotionaly and physicaly attracted to a person in my whole life.

So, on with the story, so I fell in love with someone, not only is it a person I havent met before but its a person that lives 1500ks away. My god Jamie. So, what do you do when you love someone that lives 1500ks? forget about it? find someone else? yer, there both good options, but i took option "C" and packed my shit up and went to see her. Yep, 1500ks away to visit a girl Ive never met before. Jamie your fucking insane.

So I pack my things, travel 15 hours to see her. For the first time in my life I look at her, not in a picture or a dream but right infront on me. A vision of perfection, her photo's, whilst breath taking, dont do her justice. We get along right away without horrible arkward silences, she seemed somewhat "distant" but this was nothing that time would not overcome. Atleast thats what I thought.

That night, I asked her about her distant behavior. "Its just that...." She started, tears rolling down her face "... Im not strong enough, I couldnt handle a long distance relationship" My god I thought as I felt that ever fimiliar feeling in my chest, somewhere just where my ribs met that I imagine is what its like to be stabbed with a white hot serated blade. I briefly thought about it and decided to would be for the best if I left. "Lets go out for dinner" I told her, atleast I would have one nice memorey of going down there.


TO BE CONTINUED..........