I found him in a discarded shoe
I assure you all I say is true
Into my face the cockroach flew
But somehow I live to tell this story to you.
His wings were big and a fiery red.
Looking at him brought pains to my head,
Pains so bad I wish I was dead.
I'm glad at the end I poisoned him with lead.
From the depths of the toilet he emerged with a sigh.
I hoped that it was my final goodbye.
I looked up at the darkening sky,
With a flush and a gurgle I got him to die.
Alone I sit now, for I am insane.
My shadow strolls down a shadowy lane.
And the days go by, on my toilet a stain
That marks the satanic cockroach's eternal pain.
Isn't that wonderful? And it isn't all....
Are you mentally retarded?
Are you mentally ill?
Then you belong on Capital hill!
Clinton's a madman
And so is Bob Dole
Newt Gingrich's a wacko
Ross Perot is a mole.
Come join together my political friends,
All you disturbed ones
At your wit's bitter end.
And on Capitol Hill you'll do well, you see,
Come on kids, play this strange game with me!
(To be sung in crowded Jr. High locker rooms)
I am just a paper boy
On my paper route
Who's gonna help me make my delivery?
Who's gonna sort my british pounds out?
(TEN POUNDS) TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT!
(TEN POUNDS) TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT!
(...to be repeated ad infinitum)
By Taleth
The footsteps come nearer
Beware Tamara Beware
The sound comes closer
Be scared Tamara, be scared
In your mind, there is fear
Hide Tamara, hide
An image appears in thy room
Run Tamara, run
The man comes closer
Beg Tamara, beg
The man grabs his knife
Cry Tamara, cry
The blood spills out of your open chest
Die Tamara, Die.
I think this arose from my thinking I had a stalker. It was funny at the time.
Back in the day...this was early sophomore year...Talya, Tawny, Lucky and I decided we would spend the next summer filming a ridiculous "movie" called "The Four Psychos," with the four of us in the title roles. I actually wrote a few sketches for us to do. Predictably, we never got to filming it...and perhaps the world is better off that way...but here is one of those infamous scripts. This thing is oscar-calibre, folks. Brace yourselves.
HOME THE ENEMY: HOLE CHILD THE ALLY: PINK FLOYD HUMOR GOOD LITERATURE A LITTLE STORY I MADE UP QUOTE(S) OF THE DAY A BIT ABOUT ME RANDOMNESS PHOTOS LINKS GUESTBOOK CREDITS
