40 Entries Old! ...No, I'm only 39! ...I am, really!
Topic: Games and other fun stuff
Well, I found a new favorite website...

Yeah...

Anyway, I invented a new game...

Who is the most stereotypical figure in pop culture that represents the (culture group)?

Since I am Polish and Irish...we will put those off for awhile, so let's do the Italians! Who is the most stereotypical Italian?

Is is A: Mario?

B: Rocky Balboa?

C: Joe Pesci?

D: Tommy Vercetti (from Vice City)?

E: The Godfather?

or F: The Chef from the Muppets?

Post a comment to vote!

Next round, the Russians!

Shout out's:
Tommy Vercetti
Mario
The Godfather
The Chef
Rocky

Just Stupid:
Stereotypes
Joe Pesci

-Mr. Joseph

Entry Bowl XXIX: More BC
Topic: Celebrities!
Here are the wonderful pictures from the Bruce Campbell Event...

The event went well, except that the people there didn't know how to wind a camera and the pictures of me and Bruce are forever lost. I got one pic of Bruce and Jack, however, it is not working right now.

Ted Raimi is drunk (j/k) and meets someone I called "The Superfan"

ME AND TED RAIMI! (That's right, I'm not making it up!)

"Mr. Raimi, I'm such a big fan, could I have your autograph?"

JACK AND TED RAIMI (He was lucky he got pics with both! But I got autographs of both!)

"Mr. Raimi -- please?"

Bruce and Ted give some lucky guy their autographs.

"Next!" -- BC

Check out Groucho Marx in the Hawaiin shirt. (The guy in black on the far right couldn't figure out my camera)

Bruce signs autographs for fans who couldn't show up, but have connections.

Ted and Bruce on stage.

"Yeah, drunkass, you just made 'Congo'!"
I have NO idea what that was all about.

Bruce laughs at Ted answering a question regarding Bulgarian rap (see the movie and you will "get it").

Ted demostates a rap and Bruce thinks "What the Hell is doing?"

They make an exit as the film starts.

"Enjoy" shouts Ted (as Bruce hides behind him)

Then we all watched...

And it was good. Also, I forgot to mention that Ted co-starred in the film.

Some of my pictures aren't f***ing working, so when I figure it out, I will post the rest. Damn Walgreens camera!

Shout out's:
Jack
Ted
Bruce

Just Stupid:
Cameras that have to wind
Walgreens

-Mr. Joseph
P.S. Jack, if you want these pictures. Call or email me and we'll figure it out.

38: OMIGOD!
Topic: Celebrities!
OMIGOD OMIGOD OMIGOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I met Bruce Campbell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Aaaaahhhhh!!!!!

It was sooooooo awesome! Me and my friend Jack went to see him. Mike cancelled, Angus and Nora didn't show up, so it was just me, Jack, Bruce, and Ted.

Ted?

Yes, Ted Raimi, brother of Sam Raimi (producer of Spiderman and Evil Dead), made an appearance with Bruce Campbell.

Jack and I each met Ted Raimi and got pictures with him, and I got his autograph!

It was so awesome. Ok, now I will relate the story.

Jack arrived at my house at 2 PM and him, mom, and me left for the bus. We bussed down to the Oriental Theatre and met mom's friend Will. We got something to eat and got our tickets. (Jack was #30, I was #31; mom and Will didn't want his autograph) After waiting in line for 45 minutes, Bruce Campbell finally arrived (he was fashionably late). We waited some more and finally it was out turn. Jack went first. Here is the "transcript"

Bruce: Who's Jack?
Jack: Me, hey, can you sign it, "To Jack, my one true love"?
Bruce: See here's the thing Jack, I don't do that with guys, so here, I'll sign it, "Shop smart", ok?
Jack: OK

Jack said he was crushed. LOL. Next was me. Here is my conversation...

Bruce: Ok, who's Joe?
Joe: That's me.
Bruce: Hey how's it going?
Joe: Great! It's great to meet you! (shake hands)
Bruce: (sees my shirt, reads it) New York Strength Gym?
Joe: Yeah, I came all the way from New York to meet you.
Bruce: Naw, you didn't
Joe: Yeah, all right, hey Army of Darkness was a great movie!
Bruce: Well, ya picked a guy with good taste.
Joe: Yeah, Escape From L.A. was cool, too.
Bruce: Thanks.
Joe: How was working with Kurt Russell?
Bruce: Good! He's a really nice guy!
Joe: Cool, hey, thanks for coming to Milwaukee.
Bruce: Sue thing, take care now.
Joe: OK, bye!(walks away)
Bruce: Hey, see "Sky High"!
Joe: OK, I will.

And I will. ASAP. After that I took more picutres of him and eventually Ted Raimi showed up and I asked for a picture and he was real polite and nice about it, so I convinced Jack to ask for one and I was able to ask for and autograph, too.

After more picutres, we went to sit down. But not before seeing this peculiar film poster...

I know, what the Hell...?

Anyway, we sat down, but the people behind us were drunk, stoned, and retarded and they shouted many inappropriate, but funny things. It got to the point of being offensive, so my mom reported them. The manager "convinced" them to shut up.

After that, Bruce Campbell came out with Ted Raimi and did a "talk". It was hilarious. He answered a question regarding when Evil Dead IV was coming out and he said, "Who wants to beat the shit out of that guy?"

Then, later he called someone a "drunkass".

So, finally, we watched the movie. It was hilarious! I can't explain the plot. (Go see it!)

So, yeah, that was an amazing time. Thanks to Jack for making it so much fun. Thanks to mom for taking us. Thanks to Will for guiding us there and whatnot. And thanks to Bruce Campbell and Ted Raimi for coming.

I know, you are thinking, WHERE ARE PICTURES?!!?!

I will get them developed soon. Don't worry, I got like 27.

OK, well, Longmire updated recently and awhile ago, he met Bruce Campbell, too. So I will email him and we will see what is going on.

Here is Longmire's "tribute" to BC. Clash of the Titans: Longmire and Campbell

Scroll down a little.

Also, Bruce Campbell's signature is just a poorly written, "BC". LOL

Well, picutres, scans, and more to come on this issue. Also, here is Jack's Blog, Mile and a half: Jack's Blog

You can read his story there.

OK, now to get my pictures developed!

Also, this is what he signed...

This is what we watched...

This is what I promised I would see...

That's it!

Shout out's:
Jack
Mom (major thank you)
Will
BRUCE CAMPBELL
TED RAIMI

Just Stupid:
Drunk, stoner retards

-Mr. Joseph

Entry XXXVII: COMMUNISTS! and McDonald's
Topic: Stories, rants, etc.
Well I have the scan of my favorite Anti-Monopoly Communist pin.

...Here's a thought...in a Communist Government, isn't there a monopoly? The Government owns everything, right? So, in essence, this pin really doesn't make any sense...

Anyway, here it is...

Now, what is the weirdest thing you have ever overheard at McDonald's? Well, here's one. Me and Terri overheard someone say, "Ooo, it's a dark one!" Think about that. How many possible ways is that not a phrase to use in a conversation.

"Look at this mole."
(Cue)

"Doctor, look at the new-born baby."
(Cue)

"Now class, I'd like you to meet our new student."
(Cue)

"Should we pull that guy over, Chief?"
"Um, (Cue), yes! Definitely!"

"Mr. President, this is Barack Obama."
(Cue)

"Ma'am, are you ready to deliever the baby? Ok, put your legs up here...(Cue)"

If you have more, please let me know...


Here's a few things you shouldn't start off a conversation with...

"Man, I HATE going to court."
"Hail, mein Fuhrer, und? UND?"
"Hey Chief, spare an ax?"
"Look out! ...haha gotcha man, oh ge-- LOOK OUT!"
"God, I love Genesis!"
"God, I love Foreigner!"
"God, I love the Culture Club!"
"Everybody have fun tonight! Everybody Wang Chung!"
"Sir, let me say this, I know Arlen Specter and you sir, are no Arlen Specter."
"Naw, she's gotta be eighteen!"
"Hey, what some Mad Cow?"
"Get 'em while they're slippery! Real slippery!"

Ok, now here are some things that would be weird to walk into a conversation on...

"And then the doctor said, 'Where's my pants?!'"
"Hey, that's fine by me, but you gotta ask the clown's lawyer."
"Of course, I am constipated! Duh!"
"Dude, I think I accidentaly touched the wrong part of an elephant."
"Well, um, that would depend on the height of the altar boy."
"Aaaaargh!"
"Yeah, by all means, poke it."
"So, you want to see Peter Gabriel together?"
"I swear, I coulda wiped out the entire mullet hairstyle back in 1994."

If you have anymore, send them to me!

Shout out's:
Commies

Just Stupid:
McDonald's

-Mr. Joseph

Entry 36
Topic: Songs and Quotes
Well it has been awhile since I have had no announced purpose to blog, so here it is.

UPDATE: I have found Teacher Quotes Edition II. They are on my dad's computer, which does not have email or a disk drive so you will have to wait on those. Sorry.

UPDATE: I have the Communist Monopoly Pin. I will post that tomorrow, after scanning in on my girlfriend's scanner.

So now, I owe you a Tribute (and review) to the JAWS serires and a review of the Missing in Action series.

Now for the fun...!

We all know the song "Livin' on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi, so, I decided to write a remix. It's a Wisconsonite version. Here is the part that I replaced...

Livin' on a Prayer
She says we’ve got to hold on to what we’ve got
’cause it doesn’t make a difference
If we make it or not
We’ve got each other and that’s a lot
For love
We’ll give it a shot

Whooah
We’re half way there
Whooah
Livin’ on a prayer

Take my hand and we’ll make it - I swear
Livin’ on a prayer

-Jon Bon Jovi

Here is my remake...

Hand me a Beer
We gotta hold on to the beer we got
It'd be really cool if it was a - lot
Of Beer
Now gimme some shots!

Whooah
We're almost 'der
woo-hoo!
Gimme a beer!

Take my keys
And don't let me steer
Woo-hoo!
Gimme a beer!

Gim' me a beer!

By: Joe Bon Jonvi

That is mine. Oh yes.

So on Saturday, we went to Devil's Lake for the day. This is what we did.

(1) Attempted bike ride (turned back because trail was too hard for my younger bothers)
(2) Swimming (Patrick got out because he was cold)
(3) Snorkling (Patrick excluded; Dad got out because of water in his ears; Guthrie and I saw some bluegills watching over their nests)
(4) Attempted hike across the bluffs (Guthrie quit after 15 minutes, Dad stayed with Guthrie, rain eventually turned me and Patrick back)
(5) Hiked back in thunderstorm
(6) Debated what to do next
(7) Saw second storm coming. Packed up to leave.
(8) Took pictures of a great redneck pick-up truck (pictures to come!)
(9) Got in the car seconds before storm started
(10) Arrived home at 5 pm (six hours earlier then planned)

Great trip, huh?
Well, I did get some great pictures and I invented a new phrase...

When describing how something startled you, say it this way...

"Well, that scared the demons right out of my shorts!"

...heh heh heh. If you crack your voice on the word "shorts", it sounds gr-r-reat!

See the funny thing is that there is probably some redneck in Texas or Kentucky or Louisiana that actually says that.

Well, off to see if Longmire rose from the grave again...

Bye!

Shout out's:
Family
Bon Jovi
Longmire

Just Stupid:
Ruined vacations
Rednecks

-Mr. Joseph

Entry 35: Tribute II: Bruce Campbell
Topic: Tribute of Honor
Now it is time to honor Bruce Campbell, God of "B" movies.

He has been in such films as...

The Evil Dead
Evil Dead II
Army of Darkness
Congo
Escape From L.A.
Spiderman
Spiderman 2
Bubba Ho-Tep
Sky High
The Man With the Screaming Brain
and many more!

He has been in such TV series as...
Hercules: The Legendary Journies
Xena: Warrior Princess

He has written two books...
If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor
Make Love!* *the Bruce Campbell Way

I have seen him in...
Evil Dead II
Army of Darkness
Spiderman
Spiderman 2
Escape From L.A.

I have read both his books and I will see "The Man With the Screaming Brain" and get his autograph on my copy of "Make Love!* *the Bruce Campbell Way" this Thursday. He is coming to the Oriental Theatre and I will be there, as well will be my friends, Jack, Mike, and Angus.

So here are some of his great films...
Bruce Campbell in his first released film...The Evil Dead

The Sequel...Evil Dead II

The Final Installment of the Series...Army of Darkness

Here he is in Escape From L.A. as "The Surgeon of Beverly Hills"

The first film he shares with Kurt Russell

And the second...a horrible Disney film...

The two Spiderman movies

As Elvis in Bubba Ho-Tep

His books

and...

Finally, his new, upcoming movie...

Here is a link to an old entry of mine. My first picture, my first unofficial "tribute".

Here it is...

Scroll all the way to the bottom...

And here is a link to the Army of Darkness script...

This is the original script

Here are a few of his best quotes...

"Klato, verata...n-(coughcoughcough)"
-Army of Darkness

"Now listen up, you primitive screwheads! This is my BOOMSTICK!"
-Army of Darkness

"Groovy"
-Evil Dead II

"The Human Spider? ...That sucks!"
-Spiderman

"Ooo, and they're real!"
-Escape From L.A.

"Shop smart! Shop S-Mart!"
-Army of Darkness

Well that is pretty much it for now...

I will post pictures of the event after Thursday.

Shout out's:
BRUCE CAMPBELL
















-Mr. Joseph
P.S. Tribute: Bruce Campbell Part II will probably occur sometime in the future.

#34: Walter Payton! and other stuff
Topic: Movie Reviews!
Hi all

This is who I should dedicate this entry to...

The Greatest Football Played that ever lived. Sweetness.

...

With that aside, now to catch up on what I owe you. REVIEWS! I will do Rambo here today.

First Blood (1982)

Searching for an old Vietnam friend, John Rambo walks into a small, quiet town. After learning that his friend is dead from cancer, he is hassled by a local sheriff who is intent on keeping "drifters" off the streets. Rambo protests and is immediately taken into custody. After more abuse, Rambo escapes and wages a one-man war against the police force sent after him. Eventually the national guard is called in and the stakes are hired. Until Col. Sam Trautman (Rambo's old commander) shows up. He tries to convince Rambo to give up, but in vain. Rambo unleashes one last attack on the city until he is cornered in the sheriffs's department and is convinced (by Trautman) to give himself up.

First Blood is an epic story that shows more emotion that given credit. Stallone tries to demonstrate some of the plight that Vietnam Veterans went through after forst arriving back to America after the War. Generally a good film.

Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)

Since his arrest and conviction, John Rambo was sentenced to five years hard labor to pay for his "crimes". Trautman, however, finds away out. He offers Rambo a chance to be pardoned if he takes part in a covert operation in Vietnam. The mission: Take photographs of POW's left in Vietnam. He accepts and is given instruction. At the drop, something goes wrong and he loses all his equipment and nearly his life. He lands safely and arrives at the POW camp. Unable to take pictures, he rescues one and makes him to the pick-up point. The pilot informs Murdoch, the operation commander, of the situation. Murdoch, in turn, orders him to abort. Rambo is abondoned and captured by the Vietnamese army. On news of Rambo's capture, Soviet General Petrofski arrives at the camp to interrogate him. Rambo eventually escapes after a vicious torture scene. Meanwhie Trautman discovers why Rambo was abondoned and a conspiracy is uncovered. Trautman is then placed under arrest. Rambo makes it back to the camp and rescues all of the POW's and steals a helicopter. After a pulse-pounding chase, Rambo destroys the pursuing chopper and makes it back to base. He warns Murdoch to find all other POW's, otherwise, Rambo will "find" him.

In this second installment, Stallone goes for the over-the-top action movie and succeeds. This movie is stereotyped for being unintelligent and rightfully so, but it is still a great flick that can still be entertaining!

Rambo III (1988)

Living in Cambodia after is last mission, John Rambo has declared that his "war is over" and turns down an offer made by Col. Trautman to assist Trautman in an secret mission to deliver Stinger Missiles to Afghan Freedom Fighters. Trautman's mission fails and Rambo realizes it is up to him to rescue Trauman. He travels to Afghanistan and meets with local rebels who are being wiped out by Soviet invaders. After they are viciously attacked, he goes to the Soviet base. He attempts to rescue Trautman, but it fails. On the second attempt he able to break Trautman out and they try to escape. They succeed until they are in the desert and are surrounded by the entire Soviet platoon. "Fuck 'em" is Rambo's answer to surrender. They are saved at the last minute by the Freedom Fighters and all is well.

Rambo III was Stallone's attempt to shine some light on the situation in Afghanistan and the brutal massacre by the Soviet armies. Unfortunately, his statement is not as effective as it could have been. A trequel of a dumbed-down series is no place for political statements. However, it is a thriller and a very good movie.






Well, take it or leave it. They are good movies and worth watching. But that is it for this entry!

Shout out's:
Walter Payton
First Blood
Rambo: First Blood Part II
Rambo III

Just Stupid:
The dangerous similarities between the Rambo series and MIA series.

-Mr. Joseph

Entry XXXIII: Forgotten Promises
Topic: Announcements
Ok, so I have read through all my old entries and this is where I will post promises that you all thought I had forgotten about.

Hoo boy, you better appriciate this!

Entry Double-O 27: I mentioned "Top Yawn" ...yeah, don't hold your breath on that. It won't happen for awhile.

Entry 25: I posted a picture of "Missing in Action 2: The Beginning / Braddock: Missing in Action III", so I really owe you a review of all three films, so that will be an upcoming feature.

Entry 22 to you: I mentioned that Kayla quit. She did not, however Craig did, but no promotion in sight. See, the Summer months are not very busy, so it isn't neccessary to hire anyone new. However I heard that there is a plot made by a good number of employees to all quit in late January, in an attempt to strike back at Dave (who takes over, fully in late January), the new manager. So, if I don't get promoted then, I'm looking into a new profession.

Also, I promised a picture of "Doctor" Kent "Dr. Dino" Hovind ( a Christian Scientist), so here it is...

heh heh heh...

Into the 21rst Century, I mean Entry...: I promised Edition II of my Teacher Quotes...unfortunately, I cannot locate them. I will post them when I do.

"Lucky" Entry 13: I said I would scan my "monopoly" Communist pin on to my blog. Well, I don't have a scanner, but I will see what I can do.

Entry Vol. 3: I said I would post a column from my now-dead newspaper, so let em find a good one and here it is!
This is an editorial I wrote sometime back in Winter '04...

What I hate about America. Well, to start, I really dislike the KKK. Those bigots are at the top of my “hate list”. They and their kind are an embarrassment to the U.S. of A. I mean, who really believes race makes a friggin’ difference on the kind of person someone is? Please note that the KKK includes Pat Buchanan, Michael Savage, Rush Limbaugh, and Robert Byrd.
Also, I really don’t enjoy baseball all that much, either. But, there is nothing wrong with it. (Except the inhumane salaries and drug use)
What about people? How about Bill O’ (phone-sex) Reilly, Ann Coulter, Sean Hannity, Ross Perot, George Bush (the elected) George W. Bush (the un-elected), John Ashcroft, George Will, Dick Cheney, and Bill Gates are the “Big Ten”.
Following them are Richard Simmons, Kelsey Grammar, the cast of Friends (they all count as one), Brittany Spears, Art Garfunkel, Dr. Phil, Michael Jackson, Ashley Simpson, Tony Hawk, and every “boy band” of the late ‘90’s.
Some more items that are repulsive to me are “genetically enhanced” beef, mechanical pencils that don’t work, generic soda, Kool-Aid, Florida CHADS, FOX News, WB News at Nine’s The Point, pennies, Seventeen Magazine, AOL, Ford Pintos, GM, Volkswagen Beetles, Geometry, Chemistry, war, The School of the Americas, cigarettes, cigars, American beer, acne, wedgies, bullies, disco music, chick-flicks, “All natural” fruit juice with 2% actual juice, hierarchy in all forms, the bull crap about liberal bias in the media (when there is an obvious conservative bias [FOX and WB most guilty]), the Patriot Act, the Confederate Flag in the South (or anywhere), and male strippers.
Well, that’s all my “hate-spewing” for now. What’s yours?
Joseph Kay

So yeah, that's still a pretty acurate list. Except, I now hate Karl Rove, too.

Well those are the promises that I could keep and here some updates on my life for you.

The "Loop" at work has been split up. Permanently. Eric quit and now me and Adam have formed the "SS" (the Serbian Segment). "Serbian" because were work at "American Serb Memorial Hall". Also, Eric DID NOT come to Jaws for "The Loop's Three Week Anniversary" (Jaws movie marathon). Terrible.

I went to my fist YCL meeting. Well, it was kind of dull (I had no idea what they were talking about). But it was a good experience and I am glad that I went. Let me sum up the YCL member is a single sentence. They are a bunch people out of the social loop who want to do good for the world in their own different way.

I don't necessarily agree with their philosophy, but I admire their dedication. I don't know if I will go again.

Wow, what an entry. So to sum up, I owe you all a Missing in Action series review, Jaws series review, Rambo series review, Edition II Teacher Quotes, a tribute to Bruce Campbell and a scan of the Communist pin. Ok, well then I will get to work.

See ya!

Shout out's:
Myself, it's about damn time, I deserve one.
Me (again, for going through with all my promises)

Just Stupid:
The promises I couldn't fulfill.

-Mr. Joseph

Entry 32: Relationships
Topic: Stories, rants, etc.
Wow, after my Jaws Movie Marathon, I learned of many sad tales of love and loss.

Mom and Mark who were "over" have resumed peace talks, but it doesn't look good.
Spencer and Amanda broke up.
Angus and Molly broke up.
and, the clincher...
Adam and Carynn broke up!

However, me and Terri have resolved some problems and our TWO YEAR ANNIVERSARY is coming up on July 31st!

Speaking of Jaws...
The marathon went very well. Megan, Dave, Terri, Joe, Jack, and Adam all showed up. It was a huge success!

So with that in mind, I will note that there will be a "Tribute" to the "Jaws" series soon. I will give a full review of all four movies.

Coming Soon: I will update things promised in earlier entries, tribute Jaws, and tribute Bruce Campbell who is coming to Milwaukee on JULY 28th!

Shout out's:
Jaws
Megan
Dave
Adam
Jack
Joe Part II
TERRI
Bruce Campbell

Just Stupid:
Break ups
Jaws: the Revenge (I forgot how horrible it was)

-Mr. Joseph

Entry 31: Tribute I: Gary Numan
Topic: Tribute of Honor
This is the first of an unknown number of "Tribute Entries" in which I will post an entry regarding someone who is great in some way.

Today is ... Gary Numan

He has hit sons like...
Cars
Cars (Remix)
Are Friends Electric
Everyday I Die
We Are So Fragile

My personal favorite song by Numan is Cars.

Here are the lyrics:

Here in my car
I feel safest of all
I can lock all my doors
It's the only way to live
In cars

Here in my car
I can only receive
I can listen to you
It keeps me stable for nights
In cars

Here in my car
Where the image breaks down
Will you visit me please?
If I open my door
In cars

Here in my car
I know I've started to think
About leaving tonight
Although nothing seems right
In cars
His latest album was "The Mix" in which he remixed all his old songs.

I think this quote sums him up...


"It's a Numatic thrill of a ride...I'm talking about, of course, Gary Numan."
-Adam First, D.J. for WAVE 103, Grand Theft Auto: Vice City, Rockstar Games.










Shout out's
Gary Numan













Hope for a comeback.

...in Cars!

-Mr. Joseph