CEO
CEO's are
Hey Yall I was slightly enamoured by CEO's for awhile and during this time I invented some slightly silly jokes about them (listed below) Then I did some research and found some sites. enjoy!
Q:What did the CEO say when he walked into someone elses business?
A:This is none of my business
Q:What did the CEO say when his secretary handed him the annual production report?
A:Thanks!
Q:What does CEO stand for?
A: Canadian energetic optometrist
Q:What else does it stand for?
A:Clearly Everyday Odd
Q:What is the last thing it can stand for?
A:Chief Executive Officer
links
http://entreworld.lycos.com/Perspectives.cfm?ArticleID=199
http://entreworld.lycos.com/Perspectives.cfm?ArticleID=89
http://www.ceoexpress.com/
http://www.ceoresourcesinc.com/
http://www2.nordby.com/ceometer/ceometer.asp
http://www.a-ten.com/alz/ceo.htm
http://www.ceoemp.com/
http://www.ceoinst.com/
http://ceo.com/
http://www.ceoinst.com/
http://www.refresher.com/ceo.html
ceo jokes
A young executive was leaving the office at 6pm when he found
the CEO (=Chief Executive Officer) standing in front of a
shredder with a piece of paper in hand.
'Listen,' said the CEO, 'this is important, and my secretary has
left. Can you make this thing work?'
'Certainly,' said the young executive. He turned the machine on,
inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
'Excellent, excellent!' said the CEO as his paper disappeared
inside the machine. 'I just need one copy.'
Q : Whats the difference between an insurance company CEO and the mafia
don?
A : The insurance company CEO can tell you how many people will die this
year. The mafia don can tell you the names of all of them.
A fellow had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech
corporation. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and
presented him with three numbered envelopes. "Open these if you run up
against a problem you don't think you can solve," he said.
Well, things went along pretty smoothly, but six months later, sales
took a downturn and he was really catching a lot of heat. About at his
wits's end, he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took
out the first envelope. The message read, "Blame your predecessor."
The new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at
the feet of the previous CEO. Satisfied with his comments, the press --
and Wall Street -- responded positively, sales began to pick up and the
problem was soon behind him.
About a year later, the company was again experiencing a slight dip in
sales, combined with serious product problems. Having learned from his
previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope. The
message read, "Reorganize." This he did, and the company quickly
rebounded.
After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again
fell on difficult times. The CEO went to his office, closed the door
and opened the third envelope.
The message said, "Prepare three envelopes."
The CEO of America Online resigned after just four months with the
company, and I think I know why: "He used up his 50 free hours."
Key Verses for chapter 1
A little bit about me
full christianity report
introduction
The Key Verse for chapter 2
jokes
christianity report
My guestbook
the first 16 chapters of Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin
10 Word Stories:The Collection
links that I like
A Lot Of Games
Slieinad: the secret planet
sprenkfrentalia
CEO madness
Luke 17
My opinions on sex
Mike (this is not you pladdey... I hope)
a crazy quiz
A Christmas story
All of my pictures!