6. Tender rendition of "The Wedding Song" performed by Pinkard & Bowden
5. When the minister asks "Who giveth this woman to be married"...
some guy in the back stands up and hollers Earnhardt!"
4. Reception conversation includes the phrase,
"So what have you been
doing
since Hee Haw, Mr. Lindsay?"
3. Snack trays at reception: Vienna sausages and Nacho Cheese Doritos
2. Plans for the honeymoon evening include tickets to the monster truck
rally
...And The Number One Way To Tell If You're At A Redneck Wedding...
1. Sign in front of the church: No Shirt...No Shoes...No Problem!
Redneck Sex Quiz
Answer T or F to the following statements:
1) A pubic hair is a type of wild rabbit. 2) Asphalt describes rectal problems. 3) A condom is a large apartment. 4) Douche is the French word for "twelve". 5) Genitals are people of non-Jewish descent. 6) A diaphragm is a drawing in Geometry. 7) Fetus is a character on Gunsmoke. 8) An erection is when Japanese people vote. 9) A dildo is a variety of the sweet pickle. 10) An umbilical cord is part of a parachute. 11) Spread Eagle is an extinct bird. 12) A menstrual cycle has three wheels. 13) The clitoris is a type of flower. 14) Testicles are found on an octopus. 15) Kotex is a radio station in Cincinatti. 16) Masturbate is used to catch large fish.
10. Rehearsal dinner held at Hooters
[