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League of United Barn Yard Animals (LUBYA)
Cows: Mainly the Officers. President is Master Cow. Secretary of defense is Master Bates. ***(for our dumb or slow visitors, HINT HINT! It is a JOKE!)Treasurer is Master Pig.
Originally, this part was supposed to say "Lambs are dumb, and are the scum of the earth." However, due to social actions of various "Lamb Protorate" parties, I Master Cow have been forced to remove such comments from this page. Well DAMN YOU PUNKS TO HECK!!!!!! MUHAHAHAHAHA!
Horses: Military dictators, they frequently try to take over the minds of other animals, and do not permit any things said that go against their fascist regime. This page however, has not yet been found out by the dumb fascist horses!
Potatoes: Contrary to popular belief, potatos <----(Dan Quayle didnt spell it right, while I did. Once again, fact that Cows are really smart.) are actually a barnyard animal. The position they hold are the mines. So why dont you see any farmers explode? Why would a potato commit suicide? Well farmers these days have better vision than they used to. That's why they find these potatos, strip them of their explosives, and punishes them by having them have their eyes taken out. That's why since the 1800's, no farmer has ever blown up, and also the reason why no more women were blamed for being witches. (For more info on the witches, check out the conspiracy section of my page.) And as for the second question, I will answer it with another question. Have you ever heard of Kamikazi pilots of World War 2?
Ducks and Pigeons: These birds make up the air forces (ever see "THE BIRDS"?). Can you guess why they poop on your cars? Well, anyway, that's not their sole purpose. Their purpose is to kill all with their mighty beaks once the time comes.
Recent Conquests
Fascist Librarians
It was inevitable, but a massive fight has occurred between students (humans) and librarians (non-living sub-human vegetables). Now usually, I do not side with humans, but in this case, it is very special. The librarians are... by mere coincidence, incredibly ugly. One has a humongous nose used to ensnare pitiful human males into its mighty nostrils. She is also known as Ms. BigNoseHeff. She is incredibly stupid, and cannot stand even the slightest action of any kind from anyone. In other words, she is an insane, gruff, grumpy pregnant [through the nose(She gives NOSE)] creature that smells ***HUMOR*** worse than her own feces! One is Irish, not an Irish human, but Irish grass, bitter from soccer players stepping on her, she has decided to retaliate to the future soccer players of today... the students. Another is a gay man, with glasses. He does not interact with them as much, but he is still a part of their evil regime. These sub-human veggies are fascists in every sense. Their deep conspiracy involves every evil method imaginable, including propaganda! If you are a student in any school, anywhere in the world, fight these foul creatures! Call them fascists, and if the majority of your school are fascists, call them communists! You must fight these fascists! These sub-human vegetables are everywhere! As once said by the Beastie Boys, "YOU'VE GOT TO FIGHT! FOR YOUR RIGHT!..."
The Ugly, Repulsive, Foul, Horrendous Creature (Beast Face)
The Fascist Librarians of the Port Washington school have been joined by a repulsive creature, a female with no breasts, a foul and disgusting fiend who has a pig for a cousin. This foul creature is known as Angie Chuu. She is ugly beyond belief. She can only talk in mono syllabic words that is incomprehensible to normal people. She can only answer the obvious questions of a certain moronic english teacher... who shall remain nameless
(Mrs. Schulman)
[by the way, she has some kind of flat top, afro type thing going on.], anyway, this girl Angie Chuu is smart as a fat horse. (that is really dumb, and horses are fascists too) We recently (my fellow war buddies) had an encounter with this foul creature, and it was horrendous. We were first attacked by the creature and her pig. All attemps at communication ended up in fail due to her inability to speak. This was the first battle of, I fear an impending war. May Master Cow prevail!
The Great Victory
On Friday, May 1, 1998, the world cheered a great victory as one of the Fascist Librarians left the library for her final time. It was Ms. BigNose and EVERYONE (including the other facist librarians) were glad that she had breathed her final breath within the vicinity of the library, (after all, with her big nose, there was no breathable oxygen left in there everytime she took a breath), and it was indeed a great triumph for MasterCow, and his fellow colleagues and students. Everyone was in an upbeat mood, even though the shadow of millions of finals lay before them, they (the students) indeed felt a sentiment of TRIUMPH, for the BIGNOSE lady was finally gone. History will never forget this incredible moment where the Nose did not take up the entire library. 8^)
Invasion in a High School
All over the nation, high schools are forcing their students back into the school. Sure there are reasons to be happy, (such as pretty girls and such), but the overall feeling is resentment. Who would really feel good about going back to a beast face, or a huge nose, or a horrid creature? Well not me. Although I am a cow, I sympathize with you students for putting up with such misery. My heart goes out to you.
In celebration of the Great Victory, I have added celebration music! Oh Joy for the Great Victory!
The Inevitable return
As school began this September, the most noticeable thing was that there was a Big schnoz in the school. Yes, the bignose bitch had returned. There was nothing that could be done. It was after all, inevitable. What other institution would hire such an evil creature? Exactly. However, there have been pluses to this school year. For one thing, the fat cousins of beast face are gone. On the other hand, the fact remains that beast face is still in the school. The point is... there seems to be no avoidance of war.
