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.. Name Game .. Sometimes when you have a stressful day or week, you need some silliness to break up the day. Here is your dose... Follow the instructions to find your funny name. The following is an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants", by Dave Pilkey: The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names... Use the third letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name: a = stinky b = lumpy c = buttercup d = gidget e = crusty f = greasy g = fluffy h = cheeseball i = chim-chim j = poopsie k = flunky l = booger m= pinky n = zippy o = goober p = doofus q = slimy r = loopy s = snotty t = falafel u = dorkey v = squeezit w= oprah x = skipper y = dinky z = zsa-zsa Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your NEW last name: a = diaper b = toilet c = giggle d = bubble e = girdle f = barf g = lizard h = waffle i = cootie j = monkey k = potty l = liver m = banana n = rhino o = burger p = hamster q = toad r = gizzard s = pizza t = gerbil u = chicken v = pickle w = chuckle x = tofu y = gorilla z = stinker Use the fourth letter of your last name to determine the second half of your NEW last name: a = head b = mouth c = face e = tush f = breath g = pants h = shorts i = lips j = honker k = butt l = brain m = tushie n = chunks o = hiney p = buscuits q = toes r = buns s = fanny t = sniffer u = sprinkles v = kisser w = squirt x = humperdinck y = brains z = juice Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is Goober Chickenshorts. Go figure. To be fair, we should publish Al Gore's new name, too: Lumpy Burgertush.