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Song For Leah

Sometimes in the darkness I wonder, "Where are You?"
Sometimes I feel empty in the daylight, too.
The darkness inside me, so cold and so lonely,
Eats my soul 'til I can't even move.

I know You are real, but I cannot feel You.
I guess it's my fault I can't tell You are there.
It takes all my will to get up in the morning,
Oh, God, I'm so small and so scared.

God, are You there?
I know You are with me. The Bible has promised it, I know it's true.
God, are You there?
The promise seems empty. My head and heart, separate are two.

They say dark is deepest just before morning,
But Father, my dawn has tarried so long.
I dare not step forward for fear I will stumble,
The path's narrow and I am not strong.

They say Your love rises new in the morning,
But I cannot feel it, my spirit is dead.
Afraid of the valley that falls from the roadside,
My faith is locked up in my head.

God, are You there?
I'm so dry and empty. My strength is all gone, and my deeds are so few.
God, are You there?
I'm not living the right life. I feel so far away from You.

God, are You there?
I'm not worth Your trouble, I'm not worth the blood Jesus spilled on the cross.
God, are You there?
I've nothing to give You, there's no gold hidden in my dross.

God, are You there?
They say You are with me, but I cannot feel You in my deadened heart.
God, are You there?
I know You are with me. I know it and yet still I don't

God, You are there!
Help me to feel You! Help me to see Your great work in my life!
God, You are there!
Help me to serve You! When I can't feel You, still do what is right!

God, are You there?
Help me, sweet Savior, to serve and obey You in all that I do.
God, You are there!
I know You are with me, even when I can't feel You.

Comments: Yes, this IS a song a wrote for a friend of mine, Leah. It's not the same without music, but you can get the idea of what it is about from the lyrics. It is NOT meant to be depressing, with all the plaintive "Where are You, God?" It's supposed to be an expression of the feeling of worthlessness, the struggle to get up in the morning. I purposely build to the affirmation at the end: "God You are there! I know You are with me even when I can't feel You." Piano makes it incredible, with crescendos and stuff. I've written other songs before with music and everything, but this is the first one I've really liked.

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