Site hosted by Build your free website today!

The Octopus Files, by Benway

A . B . C . D . E . F . G . H . I . J . K . L . M . N . O . P . Q . R . S . T . U . V . W . X . Y . Z

Home . Blogging Tools and Sites


The Benway Empire

Other Benway Portals

Dance MP3 Directory.
Webcam Communities.

More Benway Sites

Benway Entertainment.
Music, Art and Writing.
Retro Computers and Consoles Collection
Photo Gallery

The Octopus Files is a completely free service, though Benway will always be very happy to accept any donations you may wish to give.

Directory of Weblogs, Online Journals and Diaries - B


"My inner bitch is sneaky. She often sneaks out when I am least expecting her and makes a muss of things and I have to clean up in her aftermath. She can be mean, after all isn't that what a bitch is? She has even made a couple of people cry....or at least feel really bad about themselves...but they deserved it.
I have a confession though...sometimes I wish I was more like my inner bitch all the time because she can really kick ass.


"Whenever I must fill out a form that asks me to list my hobbies and outside interests, I am bewildered. How to answer such a question? I pick up and drop hobbies like children pick up and put down Leggos. In this past year alone, I have taken up yodeling, gun-spinning, rope twirling, and knife throwing, most of which I use in my infrequent singing cowboy shows."

Bazima Chronicles

"Of course, I show up in kicks and vintage Levi's which is fine because it's been my uniform lately and the agent wants to meet me, the woman behind the Bazima. So to speak. Although I didn't do my best Sarah Jessica as Carrie Bradshaw impression for him -- the one where she says in voiceover mode: "In New York, museums are like men. Sometimes they're closed when you wish they were open." Deep."

Bedside Manner

"I got carded the night before my thirtieth birthday, and not even a second glance since then. Sometimes I hopefully ask if they want to see my ID, and usually a kind soul will indulge me. Last night though, I don't blame the woman for not carding me. After all, buying high-end tequila in your pajamas is probably a sign your partying days are behind you. Oh well. With age comes experience. We may have stayed home on a Saturday night, but after years of practice I make a damn fine margarita."

"I worked the coat-check room, along with one other person -- a local hiigh school student named Ming. Simple enough job, right? I mean, how difficult could it be. People plop their coats on the counter, you ask for .50 cents per item along with a last name and phone number (which you write on a numbered ticket), hand out a receipt, hang up the coat(s), and then do it all over again for the next customer. In theory, easy as pie. In practice -- with well over a thousand people in attendance, and only yourself and a high school student at your side -- it's an entirely different scenario."

Benway's World

"Important Notice
Due to the growing unease on the international political stage, I have decided to resolve the situation by anexing the world. From this point on, every country will now fall under the banner of 'The State Of Benway'."

Best Journal Ever

"Last night was Cindy's Basement show at the Vault, which found the guys playing the song I wrote in it's original key, and I think it sounded a lot better that way, barring Mike being out of tune and Justin repeating the last word of the song until the guitars ring out.

I lost my wallet, so I wasn't permitted to drink at the bar. Gay. Also, I got handed two free CD's, neither of which I actually kept because, hey, fuck those guys!"

Beyond Your Peripheral Vision

"suddenly though, mikey wants to move to cali. i'd been talking about it for a while. but, he hates this city as much as i do. he's ready to go. hell, i'm not settling for less anymore. i'm wasting time in this and other cities, man. if i want to be in the industry, i might as well live in the industry. fuck it! i'm tired of waiting. i'm going to go to cali and make it happen."

Big Pink Cookie

"You know what? Just put the seat down when you're done. That's all I need for bathroom harmony at my place. Heaven help the man that forgets to do that! No woman likes to sit on a cold toilet bowl by mistake!"

the Blag

"truth is i've been in hospital (...blimey, shiver me timbers, by heck.) had an operation, had to go in for a biopsy and have a general anaesthetic! anyway its all over now. i was more worried, to be honest, about embarrassing myself with all sorts of random talk when i came round from the anaesthetic, but i impressed my self, the first thing i said when i came round (totally un-rehearsed) was 'you're all abunch of stars'. quite pleasant really, at least it wasn't 'hey nursie i'd really like to slip you one' which i was truly terrified of saying for some bizzarr reason."


"I have a recurring subplot in my dreams... Regardless of what else is going on in the dream, my husband and I are desperately searching for a place to have sex, usually unsuccessfully.
What do you think that means?"

Blog Business World

"You know the feeling.
You've been writing your daily blog entries for what seems like an eternity. Every day you faithfully write a new post or three. Your topic ideas are getting few and far between. You think you can only write about gardening for so long, right?
Stop and think for a moment about what you are doing with your business blog. What is your blog's purpose?"

Blog For Up In Ontario

" The snow was so deep on the drive home along the logging road that it piled up at the front bumper and on the hood. Every few minutes we had to stop to clear it away, otherwise it flew up onto the windshield and the wipers, even on panic speed, couldn't keep the sightlines clear."

Bloggety Blog

stupid flat. stupid ad said there was stupid offstreet parking, didn't it?
so when the contracts came through with no parking space mentioned, I called to check. agent has no idea. checks. seems there's three spaces for six flats and it's potluck if you get one. which effectively means there isn't one. "


"Nothing makes me more nervous than checking this site's referral stats to discover that someone been googling my name, which happened twice this weekend. Who can these people be? Prospective employers confirming that yes, I'm completely unsuitable for any role where responsibility is an issue? People I've upset in the past looking to take vile and uncompromising revenge? Mad stalker types who've unwittingly fallen into the trap of believing that my online persona is actually far more interesting than my real one? I dread to think..."


"Isn't it weird that we can be so afraid of such a harmless house spider. It reminds me of my Aunt who has a very strange phobia. She and my Uncle were visiting me years ago, I was washing the pots (Benway doesn't understand that bit) wearing rubber gloves, my Aunt was drying them, I touched her with the gloves (not in a sexual way). She responded by running to the loo and throwing up. I thought she was just hungover and just had the urge to chuck but no, she cannot stand rubber! She can't touch rubber bands, rubber gloves, balloons and of course condoms! I found this all highly amusing, but in all seriousness where the hell does a phobia like that come from? Weird."

Bluewolf's Howl

"Quite a few people wore Festival clothing. There were archers, royalty, peasants, monks, and even a hunchback. Those who did not come in "costume" were given circletts of flowers with streamers. Everyone looked so festive and it was a very enjoyable celebration. The cake was in the shape of a castle and a huge pig was roasted (along with roast beef and chicken for those who didn't want pork after seeing the pig on the grill)."

Bob The Corgi

"You remember that I have an Arabic last name, don't you? I think they must have gotten me mixed up with some terrorist who has the same name and dialed me up at the office early this morning. When I checked my voice-mail, there was a garbled and indistinct conversation between two men in a language that could have been anything."

Boing Boing

"10-in-1 Atari emulator-in-a-joystick for $19.99
Eli the Bearded sez: Avon, the makeup company, is selling a joystick with 10 classic Atari games in it. No console needed, just hook this up to the RCA jacks on your TV and play. I was just watching someone play it, and I want one now."

Born Famous

"don't laugh, but i have a date
with a younger man. A much younger man. Twenty-six years younger.
I met him at the bus stop. We were having a nice conversation and then he said, "You have a nice smile," and pretty soon he was asking if I'd like to go for coffee some time.
"Um, well... I think I have a son older than you," I said.
"I'm 30," he said.
"Yep. My son's 37."
"Age doesn't matter."
"It does to me. "
"How old are you? If you don't mind my asking."
"I'm 56."
"You don't look it."
"Well, thanks but I'm not open to the idea of dating, sorry. That's just too weird. Friends, yes. Dating, no."
"We could be friends, then. You're a nice person. I'd like to get to know you."
What could I say? We're going out for coffee tomorrow.
I hope he's not an axe murderer. "


"By law the state budget must be completed by the start of the fiscal year. Every year the budget has not been completed on time, without fail. So Senate Majority Leader Joe Bruno has come up with a great idea. He figures since there is no teacher around to lower the grade, the assembly can just move the deadline back. As if changing the deadline for the budget will fix our massive fiscal problems. The deadline is currently April 1st and he wants to move it to May 1st. I do not understand how this will fix the long term problem."

Breakup Babe

"Let’s just say this. For the moment, Breakup Babe has only one man. And that would be Silent But Deadly Boy, who, while he doesn’t inspire the (misguided) infatuation that the doctor did, is one fine specimen of man. And who, with his rock-climbing, tele-skiing, traveling ways, is everything I’ve ever wanted in the adventure department (and I want a lot.)"

Bunny Factor 10

"I am reminded of my "Fight Club-dilemma". I hated that film. People raved about it how the violence was not gratuitous but useful to the point of the film. I never understood that: I got the point of the film even without the sickening violence that sometimes literally made my stomach turn. The same with "Caligula". I understand what the movie is about, I see the point. I am not sure that needs to be illustrated with cum-shots (I am not joking. In a mainstream film with people like Helen Mirren and Peter O'Toole). "

Butterfly Wings

"Pee spot in the hallway. Pee on a chair. Pee on the bathroom rug. Poop on clothes in sink.
A new dog in the house you might ask?!
Nope. It's called a one year old."


"I think the vendor just saw a white man and decided I was a stupid tourist, so he inflated the price on the spot. He got greedy. And it backfired in his face. I doubt he'll learn from this though. He'll probably go on trying to fleece people, thinking that he'll make a lot more money that way than by charging reasonable prices."

Your Site

Get your weblog listed in The Octopus Files