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Cheese Industries

"Because Everybody Likes Cheese!"

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Mission Statement:

Here at Cheese Industries, we are dedicated to providing the very best in furniture, apparel, and household products that are made entirely out of cheese.

We believe we have an advantage over the competition due to the fact that we have not heard of other businesses offering things of this nature made out of cheese. For this reason, our philosophy here at Cheese Industries is that either such companies do not exist or they suffer from very poor advertising, and thus their name is not as widespread enough to make them of any concern to us. We feel that this near-total lack of competition gives Cheese Industries an edge in this highly competetive marketplace, because we cannot help but win. Therefore, Cheese Industries is proud to call itself the #1 manufacturer and retailer of nonedible household goods made out of cheese in the United States.

We are 102 percent dedicated to customer satisfaction. We are so certain that consumers of all ages will enjoy our products that if anyone is not completely satisfied with the Cheese Industries product they have purchased, that person is obviously lying, and thus, their claim will be ignored by Cheese Industries. Persistence in such a lie may result in a possible lawsuit on the grounds of slander.
All content © Cheese Industries, except for the fact that they don't exist.