Happy Mother's Day
Mood:  happy
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
It is the day to honor you mommy! So get out there and do it! I hope by the time you all read this you already have! I called my mom and sent an e-card and then told her that her Mother's day mug would be sent as soon as I could afford to buy one from myself! Nothing like delayed gratification for gifts. I should start a line of greeting cards that say: Happy (holiday, birthday, anniversary or whatever)! "I apologize for the lack of a gift; I will remedy that as soon as I get the electricity cut back on!" What do you think? Would you buy a set of these cards? I can make them if you would!

I spent my Mother's day hanging out with my Aunt and Uncle and we had a very nice visit. Every time I go there I remember why I need to go there more often! In reality I have a very good family and I realize the same thing every time I visit anybody in it. Which brings me to a shocking revelation. I do not keep in touch as much as I need to! I promise to make a more concerted effort from now on. So everybody needs to go and sit by their phones! OK maybe not but I will try to keep in touch more and I ask that you all do so as well! So instead of every 6 months I will shoot for every 2 months and then try to wrestle it down to every month.... I am including friends in this as well....

So did I see my cousin Robert and his wonderful wife Denise at my Aunt and Uncle's house? As a matter of fact no, I did not. They are in Hawaii living it up 'La Vida Loca' style! Robert was a good son and he called his ma to wish her a Happy Mother's Day!

What else? Aunt Wanda and Uncle Don bought me a plant! We went to the plant store and I found a little basil plant I liked, it was purple!!! Yes you heard right the basil is purple! He is in a big ol' pot (another thing they donated to me) and he is sitting on my kitchen table next to George. Yes I did refer to it as a he.... I already named him! His name is BAZ!!! I saw on Mythbusters that talking to the plants helps them grow but playing heavy metal makes them grow faster and larger! So I might need to hook up some Zombie, Slayer and Megadeath for him to listen to! Or maybe just Zombie since I don't have any music by the other 2 bands. I will try to get some pictures of Baz tomorrow for you guys.

I found out today that my cousin Jeremiah and Tracy just had a baby girl this weekend. She is named Maile. I might get a picture of her soon. HINT HINT!!

I wanted to announce that I missed a birthday announcement recently but I take no blame from it since the person I am about to name did not put her birthday in the events calendar. HINT HINT! Jennifer M is having a birthday tomorrow. So wish her a great birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNIFER!

Gas prices
I just wanted to show some thing cool about the site that produces all of my swag, GasPrice merchandise and the 3 dollar discount!

Just A Quick Note...
Mood:  special
Well what can I say?

I have not been very faithful about updating this blog since May started. I apologize for that. I will try a little harder the rest of the month. I want to remind you that there is still a contest going on. The tombstone inscription contest. I have only recieved 2 entrys so far which is a bit demotivating but I shall persevere. The contest is wide open it's anyones game at this point! Go back to the main page to enter.

I am currently plotting out a layout for a comic. I am hoping that it will be ready by the end of July. It stars the Crazed Lunatik character, George and Stewey. I have not nailed down the concept yet so I will wait until I am in graphics production before I give anymore hints.

This weekend I am heading to Aunt Wanda and Uncle Don's house in Salem. I may not update tomorrow because of it but things should start getting back to normal on this site fairly soon. Life is kind of at a point where I am waiting for things to click together and as of yet they haven't. It is just making it hard to have anything to say. I should be writing about other things besides my life but at the moment I am a bit too self absorbed. I will give it a shot right now.

My mom is still absorbed in the hunt for a teaching job for next year. She wants to have her position locked in and not wait until Fall to see the position that her school district gives her. I can't say that I blame her, being in limbo is a truly annoying and stressful place to be. I have no doubt that my mom will land a job. She is a special education teacher and every year more kids qualify for programs to help them learn. She also has a gajillion years of experience. That doesn't mean it is not a cause for worry, anytime you are on a job hunt life is stressful. Ask me how I know. Send your wishes, prayers and positive thoughts her way.

Arlinda is graduating as a teacher in the same field. She will be looking for work herself pretty soon, probably as soon as she gets done with the graduation. Which is today! Anyone that knows Arlinda knows that she will be great at this job! Send more thoughts, prayers and wishes her way as she enters the new teaching world. Congratulations again on the graduation and good luck on the job hunt!

That's it for this entry, my dinner is calling!

A little update
Mood:  smelly
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
Yesterday I had an adventure. I started walking and ended up at the library. It was a 2.5 mile trip, so it was 5 miles total. When I got home I went to bed....

I didn't watch Foster's Home for Imaginary friends. I did not view the latest Mythbusters episode. I did not pass go, I did not collect 200 dollars. I was asleep by 8 pm. So how come I woke up exhausted? In fact I am still exhausted. I almost just skipped entering in a blog entry today but that would make 2 days in a row without a new entry.... that wouldn't be good...

Today I went out marketing with Jason my AFLAC Mentor. We hit up some businesses, handed out some fliers and some people even asked us questions. Other people met us at the door with a broom.... Now I know how Sylvester the cat felt whenever Granny would chase him off for attempting to eat Tweety. That was a Looney Tunes reference if ya missed it..... If you missed it I have one question: "Were you ever a child?" Anyway I am anxious to help with the next step..... I want to see how you turn that bit of marketing into leads... and then into business....

My other job: The cellphone thing is still going strong.... the people keep calling in and the stupidity of the customers no longer amazes me... now I am surprised when they understand what you tell them, I keep waiting for the stupid question and it doesn't come. My favorite stupid question comes after this statement: "Those minutes should show up on the phone within 5 - 10 minutes. Do you have any other questions for me?" customer: "no" Me: "Thanks for calling Cingular." Customer: "So when are those minutes going to be on my phone?" What part of the 5 to 10 minutes did they miss? And why say no to having more questions and then ask a question? I have started noticing all my conversations are the same.... exactly the same.... they may cuss differently but they are all the same....

One trend that has me boggled is the constant use of the word "cut". I will provide an example.

SCENARIO 1
me - Would you like to refill your phone today?
customer - You need to cut my phone back on!
me - So do you want the 15 dollar refill?
Customer - You all took my minutes and you need to cut my phone back on! This is my bidnes phone! I be doing bidnes wit dis phone! I need dis phone! You can't be doing me like that you need to cut my phone back on!
me - OK so do you want to pay for the full plan or just a refill?
Customer - Let me talk to your supaviza!
Me - Certainly, I will transfer you right now. There may be a hold time and you may need to restate the reason for calling when you reach the next representative. Thank you for calling Cingular!
Customer - You be..-TRANSFER-

SCENARIO 2
Me - I am sorry sir but the only option I have is for you to pay for your monthly plan I can't just add 5 dollars. Would you like to pay for your plan?
Customer - That is Bull-CENSORED!- man! Ya'll need to cut my phone back on! I got an important call to make!
Me - I am sorry sir but the only way I can get the phone back on is by having you pay for the plan.
Customer - Ya'll tryin' to rob me! You betta cut my phone back on! I use this phone for bidnes!


I think one day I might say: "Oh it's your bidnes phone?! You should have said that! Of course you don't need to pay for it! It's for bidnes! Let me get that back on for ya!"
Customer - Really!
Me - No! Now are you going to pay for the minutes or not? I have your cousin on the other line and he has a returned check he is arguing about so I am kind of busy. Can you make this quick?


That is the other thing. How come all these people bounce checks and then yell at me about it? I am not the one that tried passing a bad check, you are. I love that all these people tell you they aren't sure if it will go through so they want you to try it. Have you ever heard of checking with the bank? Nothing like playin the financial version of Russian roulette. Besides that who do they think they are fooling with the I need this phone for business bit? I think I will not pay my electric bill and when the power gets shut off I will just call them up and say "Hey y'all need to cut my power back on, cuz' I need that for bidnes! I have important cartoons to watch!" Do you think it'll work?

I should try this for everything! I can see it now: Store clerk: "Sir you have to pay for that!" me: "You must be crazy I need this bagel for bidnes! I have important cream cheese to spread!" When I land in jail my lawyer can use this argument: "But judge he had important cream cheese to spread! It was for bidness!" The judge, after seeing the flawless logic: "Mr Bakery owner, can't you see he needs that bagel for bidnes!?!"

Another use of the word "cut" came at me like this:
"Hold up let me cut this music down!" or "Hold up let me cut this phone volume up!" Huh?

The word "cut" seems very versatile!

Other then that things are hunky dorey!

Where was I.....
Mood:  cool
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
Well I took a weekend break....

Did ya miss me? Of course you didn't! You guys have things to do besides live on the Internet! I'm not bitter! Ya big fancy party all the time people! Not bitter at all....


What did I do with my weekend with out the blog? It was jam packed with excitement. Let me lay it out for you... It may take several pages, Saturday: Work, Comic Store for FREE COMIC BOOK DAY, eat left over tostadas, watch TV go to bed... Sunday: Lay around all day, it was raining so no exploratory walks, take a walk in the nearby mall and started feeling like stabbing people so I went home, sent out email to you all, watched TV went to bed....

Like I said action packed! I bet you were amazed by all that excitement!


Anyway back to FREE COMIC BOOK DAY! Every May they have Free Comic Book Day at comic stores. Last year I was in Kevin and Becky's wedding so I never made it to the comic store. I kind of feel like burning their house down over it but I won't... This year I did get to go and I got 3 free comics, 2 little toy characters, a music download card worth 50 free downloads and a couple posters! Woowoo! It was like Christmas!

The mall...... hmmm...

The mall is an interesting place. There were way to many people there for me to handle. What is with people stopping in the middle of the aisle? GET OUT OF THE WAY! I almost ran into a few people on accident and had to restrain myself from barreling through other people on purpose! "Hmmm the mall is so crowded today! I think my 400 pound behind needs to stop right here and block 3/4 of the walkway while I talk with my 2 sons age 6 and 8 that way the combined weight of a large elephant." MOVE!! It boggles my mind. I felt like getting a cattle prod sometimes! The young kids were the worst. They just parked in the middle and pretended you didn't exist. How they could stand in the middle of a crowded mall flopping their heads about like that defies logic. It is places like crowded malls that make me realize why I never will buy a tazer. I would be tempted to use it. I was daydreaming about going all Blues Brothers in the mall and driving my car through it at high speeds with a cop car chasing me..... I can see the crash ending with the 400 pound woman trying to swat me away like I was a mosquito instead of a car going 60 miles an hour into her backside.

While I was busy not tazering people or trying to run them over with a car I noticed a job that must suck. This lady was standing by the big group of gum ball machines and was cleaning them and when I passed her a second time she was still standing there. I began to wonder if she was just a lazy member of the cleaning crew or if she was in charge of the bubble gum island. If she was confined to the bubble gum island I think she would really hate kids as they squeal about wanting gumballs as they walk by. Smearing their germ ridden hands all over the glass and screaming until the parents coughed up the quarters. She probably shouldn't have a tazer either.

I found a show I really like this weekend. It's called Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. It airs on the cartoon network and I watched it after I watched a few recorded episodes of another fave from that channel called Aqua Teen Hunger Force. The ATHF show is not for kids so it airs late at night but the FHIF is good for everybody and it is pretty entertaining to boot. So I added it to my list of shows to record. So if you like cartoons, you may just want to check out the show. It is about these imaginary friends and they all live in this house run by Mrs. Foster who is this little old lady with a mischievous streak. Her granddaughter is the caretaker and a stuffy old rabbit is the manager and he is always bellowing about rules. The main characters are Mack and his imaginary pal Bloo. Bloo is a rule breaker and tends to cause most of the trouble. Some of the other imaginary friends are just as much fun. A personal favorite is Edwardo who is this large purple guy with huge teeth and he has a Spanish accent. He is the biggest crybaby and scaredy cat and he makes me laugh out loud. The show is great! If you need a kid around for an excuse borrow one and watch this thing!

I found this trolling the internet tonight and it made me laugh go ahead and check it out! Stephen Colbert Roasts President Bush This makes me wonder who was in charge of this dinner. It was pretty amusing... what I really liked about this is all the awkward silence. The press corp did not seem to like being included in the roasting. They were ready to laugh at him going after the president but not so ready when the tables were turned. I love his audition tape for press secretary at the end it was good stuff. I think I am sharing this not because of any political statement but mainly because I liked watching the awkward humor he achieves. My favorite things from when he was a correspondent for the daily show was to see him play devil's advocate to his interviewee, the way people would stop talking and stare at him in disgust was classic. I think he achieves that here, I was laughing hardest when people were the quietest.


Well I hope your weekend was good... let me know! Drop me a line!

Cars, Pedestrians and My Name is Earl!
Mood:  flirty
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
I hope you all had a grand Cinco de Mayo!! Otherwise known as Cinco de Drinko! I didn’t drink I just made some tasty tostadas (I forgot to buy tortillas for burritos). Either way they were extremely tasty!

I managed to do something different this afternoon. I didn’t head straight to the park like I swore I would instead I came home, had lunch and checked my email; it was completely empty as usual. Then I decided to head over to the library area and from there I walked to Sellwood and then back. The total trip was a little over 3 and a half miles. It was a nice walk. Sellwood has some nice looking cafes and coffee houses; I stopped in one and sat down to write with a large iced Mocha. The name of the place was Twin Paradox and it is open pretty late most days, which is always good to know. The walk did exactly what I hoped it would it started some new thoughts and I want to share this one with you.

One of my favorite shows on television is ‘My Name is Earl’. It is a great show that to me channels the spirit of that comedy gem ‘Raising Arizona’, I love this show. I was thinking about the opening where Earl gets hit by a car, after winning the lottery, and ends up in the hospital without the winning ticket. In the hospital he learns about Karma by watching Carson Daly talk about Karma and he decides to stop being a petty crook and to turn his life around by doing good things for people he wronged. He makes a list of his misdeeds and the show is all about him dedicating his life to setting right the wrong he caused and that is when the winning lottery ticket returns to him to help him accomplish his new goal. Anyway it is the car hitting him that started me thinking about things. I have always found people getting hit by cars on television and movies to be extremely humorous; even when it is not meant to be funny. The most glaring example of this happened in college. The show in question was ‘Felicity’. Ok sure go ahead and laugh it up. Yes, I saw an episode of ‘Felicity’. I was actually mooching food from some sorority girl and they started watching ‘Felicity’. Which brings up another point, college was where I learned that girls always have food. They might not have a television or a radio but they always have food. Where as single guys seem to have the gadgets and condiments but no actual food. That is one of the many reasons why guys need women…. I am still hazy on what the ladies get out of it. OK, back to the story I was heating up their leftovers from some restaurant when the show started. Trying out my good manners I decided to stay and socialize while I ate their food. So I tucked into watch the show. Felicity was being flirted with by some dumb guy that all the girls thought was charming because he was earnestly trying to win her over. In the scene I sat down for he is walking with her and finally gets a yes to a date and dramatically walks backward away from her right into an oncoming bus. Ok wait a minute let me stop laughing; the scene in my head still makes me laugh. Anyway I was laughing so hard that I was asked to leave and was not invited back for a couple weeks. The next example was very similar to this one. It was in the movie ‘Meet Joe Black’ starring Brad Pitt. The first part is this guy (Brad Pitt) flirting with this gorgeous girl (Claire Forlani). I am not sure but I think she was charmed by the guy and they part ways when Brad gets hit by a car and if I remember correctly he ricochets into another car and bounces off that one too; it was spectacular! It was like he had been turned into a pinball! I saw that scene and I was in tears of laughter. I do not remember the rest of the movie so you can see what I was thinking about while I was watching it; Brad Pitt as the human pinball. I mean how many times do you get to see people like Brad Pitt hit by a car? It was a beautiful thing! Other Examples include ‘The Craft’, ‘City of Angels’ and several other shows and movies. They have this happen as if it’s a common occurrence. What I find amazing is how many romance shows have some charming guy pulverized by a car after the girl gets interested. In my opinion it says a lot about women… or maybe it doesn’t. Either way I know it says a lot about me when I find these dramatic scenes and horrible scenarios so dang funny. It is kind of like when you are supposed to be quiet in church and all you want to do is giggle or like when you were a kid and you were being scolded and you try to be contrite but all you want to do is laugh. It is inappropriate but I would not change that reaction for the world. Before I leave you just picture with me: Brad Pitt bouncing off the hood of a car….. Leonardo DiCaprio as a human ice cube in ‘Titanic’. Ok the last one has nothing to do with a car but you have to admit that it gives you a smile to think of that scene.

Or not…


PS. Thanks for signing the Guest List Dad!

To be at Home or not to be
Mood:  not sure
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
I have recently discovered something amazing. When ever I go from work to anywhere else but home I actually accomplish something. When I go straight home I barely make it out of the house for a walk. Today I came home and fixed lunch and then goofed around until I fell asleep. When I woke up the afternoon had evaporated and the evening had begun. Up here in the Pacific Northwest that means you still have at least 3 hours of sunshine during the summer months. I decided to take my walk in the direction of K-Mart to put a printer on layaway, which turned into a long process because I had to track someone down to be helped in the layaway department. Even though it can be a bit of a hassle I love layaway. It helps me get what I want without dropping the whole bundle all at once. I have 2 months to dole out 100 bucks and I know that I will have what I desire soon. If I try the wait until I can afford it track I usually end up buying it and then trying to figure out how to live of ramen noodles and white bread for the next two months. I am planning on paying 20 dollars a week towards the printer so that I can have it in a little over a month and 20 dollars is only a small adjustment to my lifestyle, it simply means ramen noodles a couple times a week. I can handle that.

I have some ideas for a printer and I am excited that it will be here in the next 2 months. I need to start creating one of the ideas and maybe it will be done by the time the computer arrives. That is a project that is currently only residing in my head and I will let you all know when it is in a printed format.

Now that I have totally rambled about a printer and layaway I will resume my point. The issue is what I manage to get done depends on where I go after work. If I head straight home I end up snoozing in front of the TV but if I go somewhere else I write, photograph, create and work on my insurance projects. Tomorrow my big plan is to find a different spot maybe a park with a nice bench so I can sit down and work on a few things and maybe tomorrow's entry will be interesting for once....


Now if I could just figure out how to motivate myself to sweep and mop the floor, vacuum, and do laundry I would be set!

The Hike
Mood:  happy
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
Yesterday I had my first meeting with my Aflac mentor Jason. We met in Vancouver and that was my first time setting foot in Washington. I am pretty excited to start working with him. I have some homework to do for both this and the Action Insurance position. I need to come up with leads for both of these companies. I might as well say here that you may hear from me regarding an insurance quote for Action Insurance which provides auto and home insurance through 5 different companies. I want to save you money but there is no obligation to buy. If you are in Arizona or Oregon and you know someone who needs auto or home insurance let me know and I will get them quoted and signed up. Ok that is the insurance plug for the day. I am nervous and excited about starting this insurance business but I think that when I get started I will see a good result. One day I might even stop whining to you guys and gals about my air mattress and just buy myself a new bed. That would be the moment I know that I have made it, the day when I buy my own brand new bed! Sometimes I am easy to please!

After the meeting I had the entire afternoon free so I came home and tried to write a blog entry but nothing was flowing so I headed out for a walk to the mall. I had ideas of window shopping, girl watching and book reading in my head. I was making great time when I noticed a park. I made a detour to check out the park to see how big it was and what it had to offer. It had a little playground and a basketball court filled with ball players with people lined up to jump in. They also had this great walkway that led over to the Milwaukie Aquatic Park. I started heading that direction when I noticed a break in the trees on the right and a path down the hill. I decided to follow the path and ended up in this huge open field. I saw paths on the other side and I wanted to explore more so I headed out across the field. I paused to look at the yellow flowers and the white and pink blossoms on the trees when I noticed that the ground wasn't exactly solid. I took a few more steps forward and realized the ground was soft and wet because muddy water was soaking into my socks. I started running across, which in hind sight was not my best decision because now I had spots of dark mud all over my behind. Which I did not notice right away of course. I started walking along the path on the other side which ended up leading to the Aquatic Center and the Community College campus nearby. I needed a potty break so I headed to the community college. It was there while I was looking in the mirror that I noticed the mud all over my legs, so I turned around and saw the mud all over my behind. The mud on my behind made it look like I hadn't been able to wait for the potty break! I decided to cancel the mall plans and headed back to the wet grassland trail. I of course passed like 20 gorgeous women with my mud pants and I avoided every one of their eyes. As I hit the trail entrance I spotted 4 small rabbits cavorting about. I slowed down to try and sneak close enough for a picture but try as I might I could not move slow enough. After all four of them escaped into the blackberry bushes I headed down the path where I saw 6 more little rabbits. Some rabbits looked suspiciously like the rabbits that had shown up all over the place for Easter and some looked like wild rabbits. In a move that channels my mother I need to stop and point out that that means I saw 10 rabbits on my hike yesterday! I headed back along the trail and started wondering if I could take one of the trails that led further away from the park to see if it ended up near my neighborhood. I took one of the more worn paths and headed into the trees when I saw a bunch of rubbish and a large plastic trash can, you know a green one with a lid and wheels like the one you have in your backyard. I was not sure what to make of that so I kept on going. I turned a corner and I saw a tent and a canopy and decided to turn around quickly. I had no idea why there was a tent out here but I had no desire to meet the person that was living in these woods. Some little warning light was flashing in my head so I bolted out of there and straight across the soggy plains. I started to relax as I found the original trail that had led me down there in the first place but I was tired from the run and a little clumsy. I stumbled and my foot got caught up in the blackberry bushes. I avoided falling but I drove the thorn covered branches into the back of my other leg and I was bleeding pretty well. I started hearing strange noises so I hurried up the trail and out of the park. When I finally made it home I was covered in mud and blood and I was exhausted. I jumped in the shower and then just went to bed.

Today I woke up early but later then I normally would for work because I had today off. I puttered around the house and decided to watch some cartoons so I headed back to my bed/LAZBOY and turned on the television and immediately fell back to sleep. I woke up, ate, and then ran some errands. When the errands were done I headed home and added a new design to the Crazedlunatikdesigns.com Store. It is in honor of Mother's Day and every one of you should buy one for your mom! After that was finished I made some awesome cheese enchiladas! You would have loved them, wish you were here!

My Air Mattress Repair Job
Mood:  d'oh
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
It seems today I find myself in an interesting situation that leaves me bed less. Some of you may know that I sleep on an air mattress. I have no good reason to do so other then the fact that real beds are expensive and at the moment I am not sharing my bed with anyone. The air mattresses work out pretty well for me. I do not spend an inordinate amount of time in my bedroom except to sleep or to get dressed. The air mattress is comfortable enough to let me fall asleep relatively quickly and it works real well for one person, especially one poor and cheap person. The problem is that they are made out of vinyl and filled with air which is neither durable nor solid. The first air mattress I had actually lasted about 9 months before getting a slow leak and it lasted another month before the slow leak sped up to less than a night to leak all of the air. That mattress cost 50 dollars, which is considerably more then I wanted to spend for the second mattress. The second mattress was from a reputable company and about 15 dollars cheaper and it did not last much longer then 2 months. The one I have currently been sleeping on was 20 dollars and it also lasted a little over 2 months. It died last night and I mean from not even a noticeable leak to flat as a pancake. Three hours after I went to bed I woke up feeling the hard ground beneath me. It was late and I did not feel like investigating so I just moved my sleep spot from the airless mattress to the La-Z-Boy donated by grandpa. The chair is almost as old as me but it is still pretty comfortable and I have napped on it several times. It actually worked out pretty well last night.
Today I was busy enough to forget about my mattress problem, which resulted in a bit of a shock when I went in to go to sleep. I decided to set the chair up for sleep and deal with the problem tomorrow when I could decided if I could afford another one or not. As luck would have it sleep was extremely evasive. I decided to watch some TV to calm myself down because that works, right? TV in my house means DVR so I selected a show from my list of recorded features and it happened to be Mythbusters. Some of you may remember that I lauded this show as one of my favorites in a previous entry on April 2nd. I watched as they strapped Buster the crash test dummy into an airplane fuselage and dropped it from 20,000 feet to see if he would survive and it inspired me to try and find the leak and to try to patch it. I am sure I do not have to point out the similarity between dropping a fuselage 20,000 feet and repairing an air mattress because it is so obvious! Actually the show always inspires me to creatively think of solutions for problems and broken things to see if I can salvage them. I may not be doing big television show worthy construction normally but I think tonight would have been worthy of a sitcom scene at least. Somehow I managed to find the rip which was decent sized and of course I made it bigger by trying to figure out how I could jerry rig it. The first step was to feel around in the hole to try and see if I could secure some thing on the inside and then cover it with tape. I had managed to find two types of tape: scotch and packing tape. Unfortunately the taping something to the inside was a little problematic so I quickly abandoned that approach. The bad part was now I really did have a decent sized rip because of my exploration. I started brainstorming and lamenting the fact that I didn't have any duct tape. I used to have duct tape as part of my emergency car repair kit back in the VW days and I know it has been used to repair bad hoses and to reattach bumpers. If I had had it I am sure it would have worked. Of the two tapes I did have I thought packing tape would be better so I slapped a few strips across the hole and I started filling the mattress with air. It would not fully inflate and the tape did not want to stick. So I tried the scotch tape and did not have any better luck. I came up with a last ditch effort and concocted a crazy and overly complicated patch that used a combination of both scotch and packing tapes and a couple parking garage receipts. It seemed to be holding by some crazy miracle of my ingenuity (in this case ingenuity is also known as 'cheapness'). I put the sheets back on and laid down on the bed and the patch was holding! It was holding! Until I moved and then I heard "PSSSSSHHHH!" and I was back on the ground. I guess I will hold off on sending my application to Mythbusters, unless I am trying out for Buster's (the crash test dummy) job. I guess tomorrow I will be buying some duct tape...

Are you surprised that I wouldn't just buy a new air mattress or maybe even a bed? Did you miss the part about me being cheap? Or maybe you missed the "I'm poor" part, hehe. If you want to help me out just click this button!

Spring
Mood:  energetic
Topic: One Ramblin' Ranter!
It is spring in Portland and I have been spending a lot of time after work taking walks. I have also spent part of that time plotting my days off. I imagine myself enjoying the warm sunshine as I head downtown and explore the Chinese Garden or take the Walking Art Tour. I see myself getting on a bus near my house and heading downtown and living it up. It's a nice dream.

Unfortunately it is only a dream. It is true that every day I get off work it has been sunny and beautiful but every single day I am off from work it has been overccast and slightly chilly. Let's put this in perspective my days off last week were Wednesday and Saturday. Monday and Tuesday were perfectly blue skies and the best temperature ever. Wednesday was grey and I needed a light jacket. The next morning I woke up and it was clear and sunny all day and Friday it was as well. In fact Friday was a little too warm! So I wake up Saturday and put on shorts and a light cotton shirt.... and it is grey outside and slightly chilly. I decide that I will not let that deter me so I start walking in the general direction of the grocery store. As soon as I get about a 1/4 mile from my house it starts raining! I am not talking the light rain that Portland is famous for I am talking 'drench your clothes when you are a 1'4 of a mile from home' rain. So I was dripping by the time I got home. All my ideas and desires flew out the window and I tucked back into the computer and produced all of the stellar designs for the Stewey Store, the Rent My Dad Store, and the new designs for the original Crazedlunatikdesigns.com Store.

I guess I can say good came out of a spoiled day but come on just one beautiful sunny day that is completely off from work! PLEASE???