Molly's Reviews

Parenting the Ephraim's ChildParenting the Ephraim's Child: Characteristics, Capabilities, and Challenges of Children who are Intensely MORE
Deborah Talmadge and Jaime Theler
Horizon imprint
Cedar Fort Inc

Informative Read ... Recommended ... 4 stars

"Parenting the Ephraim's Child: Characteristics, Capabilities, and Challenges of Children who are Intensely MORE" is not a story book, this is 279 page work filled with parenting tips explaining why ANOTHER parenting book is needed as well as explaining just what the Ephraim’s Child is. Chapter titles include: ‘Do You have an Ephraim’s Child?’, ‘Intensity’ and ;’Persistence’. I particularly enjoyed the section pertaining to intensity, how it impacts the Ephraim’s Child and how parents may offer alternatives to emotional overload. ‘Adaptability,’ ‘Awareness,’ and ‘Sensitivity’ are addressed in separate chapters. The importance of adaptability, giving effective directions and monitoring emotional stimulation are all addressed with wit and good suggestions. ‘Activity,’ ‘Intelligence,’ and‘Control,’ are presented in chapters 9 – 10 – 11, routine, power struggles and giving choices are all addressed. ‘Independence,’‘ Disciplining the Ephraim’s Child,’ ‘When You Don’t Like Your Ephraim’s Child,’ introduce the areas of obedience, discipline vs. punishment, rewarding the good, and consistency. ‘The Special Occasion Nightmare’ when realistic expectations must be realized, preparing the child for the occasion, awareness of crowd affect upon the Ephraim’s Child, and the gift trap offers much for parents to consider. ‘Grandparenting the Ephraim’s Child,’ and ‘Being Equal to the Task,’ round out the work with suggestions to love the child unconditionally, provide support for the parents and enjoying the child.

Endnotes, Bibliography, Appendix, Recommended Additional Resources and an ‘About the Authors’ round out the 17 chapter book.

Often parenting books present a ‘formula’ method for dealing with children who are quick to adapt, accept parental instruction and seemingly always do what is expected of them. I don’t know any children like this, and apparently the writers found they were not meeting many either. Authors Talmadge and Theler write from the viewpoint of LDS women/mothers to explain that Ephraim’s Children are covenant people whose attributes may lead to building the kingdom of god because of their characteristics and not despite them. The nine common characteristics found in these determined youngsters are addressed in separate chapters. It is the writers’ intent to aide parents toward understanding their children’s temperamental traits as strengths needing refinement rather than as deficitsneeding eradication.

As a parent who raised what we termed ‘the strong willed child’ back in the 1970s when my own oldest child was growing up I found myself smiling, nodding, and at times chuckling with understanding while reading of the trials and tribulations attendant to raising a child who is, shall we say, ‘a bit determined.’

If I were to pick one single chapter as THE one for parents to read it would be Chapter 6 which addresses the need for parental adaptability when dealing with a child who often resists adapting. The writers present counsel and suggestions in mother tested, plain language to help parents understand their child is not simply being resistive or disobedient. The strong-willed Ephraim’s child IS resistive because that is his nature, not because he is overtly trying to misbehave or rebel. The importance of routine in children’s lives cannot be over emphasized and the authors are quick to point out the real necessity of routine in the life of the Ephraim’s child.

While the term Ephraim’s Child may be more significant to those who are LDS, Parenting the "Ephraim's Child: Characteristics, Capabilities, and Challenges of Children who are Intensely MORE" is a good book for parents whether or not they are LDS. Solid parent tested ideas are presented in easily understood language. Excellent choice for the home library and therapist library for use when counseling parents in how to deal with determined, Ephraim’s Children.




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© 2005 by Molly Martin