AT WAR WITH RETARDS

Ah, good old America Online. The beauty of an entity like AOL is that it can bring people closer together, until the whole planet is joined in a global group-hug. Instant messaging allows friends and family to chat without running up their phone bills. Total strangers can exchange ideas, or mutually masturbate each other over their modems. Little brats can write to Grandma and Grandpa, for Christ's sake. And then soulless freaks like me take it and turn it into something evil, a weapon to wield upon unsuspecting assholes to fuck up their day. I would usually be unwitting, staring at my computer screen when some horny or mentally challenged mofo would chime in with an instant message, always looking for a reason for me to blow up on them. At first I liked screwing with their heads cause in my profiles I'd always put that I was a female. With their boners in tow, occassionally I'd lead them on with my man-gina until I'd get bored and suprise them with my own penis. Of course, the shock value would be disastrous to their libidos, but them sometimes I'd want more, to torment strangers without them finding out where I lived and kicking my ass. So here you have it, a few cyber-conversations I was smart enough to save and cherish forever. And now you can too. All that has been altered is each numbskull's screen name; every other dim-witted comment and cutesy "LOL" is left verbatim, for your reading pleasure. Just give me some time to abuse my Yahoo messenger service so I can come up with some new ones.
Love,
HYPNOKRISHNA

THE DESTRUCTION OF MY ENEMIES--ONE COMPUTER NERD AT A TIME

--1--Stupidity is Contagious. Don't Believe Me?
--2--How Lonely Some People Can Get After Two in the Morning
--3--Stupid People Should Be Sterilized
--4--Same Loser From Fight Number One Above. He's Overjoyed to Hear From Me!