Day before Thanksgiving
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: WIND BENEATH MY WINGS
The day before Thanksgiving. I don't have my boyfriend, I'm stuck on this ship, and I have no family coming to see me. Could it possibly get any worst? Yes, it could. I'm 2 months pregnant and the food here sucks terribly. It might be okay tomorrow but I doubt it.
I'm so ready to see my boyfriend again. He always would rub my stomach before we go to sleep. I love him so much. We are currently engaged. I'm beyond ready to see him again. To hold him in my arms, kiss his lips, rub on his chest, all those things. I never realize that I would ever think about someone as much as him. Now I'm here worring about him. Wondering what he's doing or how he is? I'm so worried. Every night I sleep with his jacket on just to have something or his close to me.
I'm so lonely on this ship without him. He's the only reason why I've been here as long as I have. He was the reason why I came back all of the times I came back. To see his smile, hear his voice, look into his eyes. Everything made me feel alot better. It made me forget about the things I was going through. Just to hear him for a few minutes. He made me laugh no matter how bad I was feeling, he always put a smile on my face. I miss that now.
He is truely the sunshine of my life. I'll be glad when he get situated so we can make everything final. And live out the next chapters of our life. Now I have a child to think about. I have that to look forward to. That is what keeps me going everyday. It keeps me ticking. I even eat now not cause I want to but have to. Breakfast is kinda hard to eat sometimes.
I love my man and the child that he gave me. And waiting for our child to get here and knowing that we'll be happier ever after once everything get finalized pushes me through the day and brings me closer to the day my baby will be in my arms again.

MY LIFE
Mood:  sad
I truly don't like my job. I do nothing but sit in a cold dark room and look at a screen with some pale green objects and a green line that moves around in a circle.
I would leave my job but I'm contracted for another 3 years to do it. The worst thing about it is that if I'm not doing that, its just sit around until there's work to do and lots of training on bull shit stuff that they would never let you do.
My boyfriend isn't here and that's like the only person that keeps me sane. I love him.
More about this job. I signed up for it on October 31, 2002. I didn't start til Oct. 22, 2003. At first. I had to go to school for it. It was okay. Once I got to my actual job( which they call first command) it sucked.
Being a female going to a ship, Other females aren't going to like you all that much. They hated me for being cute and having a nice ass. They find new females a threat to there exsisting relationships. I really didn't care.
It got to the point where they started trying to get me in trouble. I kept everything in, but one day I just couldn't hold anything in so I got in alot of trouble. Fuck those bitches, that's what I told them.
This one female would talk shit behind my back so much that one day I told her to grow some balls and say the shit in my face. She still didn't. Then i just so happened to be walking around the corner when she was talking about me, I just grabbed her by her little bitty head and told her if I every hear you saying something about me behind my back I'll fuck you up. I got in alot of trouble cause she was higher ranking. But she didn't say nothing else.
These people here think your a puh-over if you don't say anything back but as soon as you do you get in trouble for disrespect. Whatever you do, if you have a short temper, don't like being involved with people, and just not a people person all together don't and I repeat DON'T JOIN THE MILITARY.