Last night I stayed up later than I have in months. Maybe even a year. Some of the cast members from the show went out to celebrate a birthday. I'm not much of a "sweets" person, but I have to say, the dessert I had at Chili's was truly evil. It was a chocolate chip caramel brownie, still steamy, goooey and hot, with ice cream and hot fudge. It was also huge. I tried to get Forest to share, but he had his own sundae to contend with. There would be no sleeping, not for hours. I didn't get to bed until 2 am. And I'm usually so responsible the night before show!
So today I'm really sleepy. Nothing in the world makes sense, and I am sitting at work, wishing I could crawl under my desk and take a nap. It would be right cozy under there, and no one would be able to tell I was down there.
Our show has been running a few times a day on the local government cable channel, and strangers have started to recognize me, and call me "Hermia". They think everything is real, but it's Shakespeare! How can they be so deluded??
I didn't realize people actually watched government cable. In Lansing, there's never anything on but city council meetings. If you are really lucky, you might catch a rerun of a really OLD city council meeting, but that's about the extent of it. I would like to see the show, I think. I only get to see little peices of it while I'm onstage, and only from my skewed and often rough-and-tumble perception. I'm far too busy to enjoy other people's performances. I would also like to see Kirstin's part of it. I am, after all, a mom. I think Matt (Demetrius) will be able to give me a copy on VHS, because he works for the government in Meridian Township. I'll look forward to it, but I won't watch it until the show is truly over. It would be BAD juju to see myself, and might cause me to subconsiously screw up. Wouldn't want that!
No, I'm not superstitious. It's just that the only way I can be a good actress is to put all self-critique and self-consciousness aside, and be someone else. I try to be exactly what the director wants me to be. Hence, I might not always appear on stage in a flattering manner. I make horrible faces in character, walk differently, and have different posture. If I were to see all of that on TV it might change my perspective on the character. I need to be in her head, not looking at her body.
