Site hosted by Angelfire.com: Build your free website today!

Welcome to Our Page called

Thrue The Eyes Of A Mother "Of A Gay Son"

I was asked bye many young guys, Kids 14-22 to place a page to help them and their Mothers,Fathers,and family's out some and here is what I came up with. All letters you find here are from Mothers or Fathers, are Family members. They are true and from them,they are not made up or false, they are heart felt, I will not mention any names as from who they are from.

Letter 1

    I have thought about this long and hard. I don't know where to begin because I really can't remember not knowing. You see my son is Gay. I guess I'll go back as far as I was pregnant. I went for a routine exam and back then they didn't do ultra sounds like they do now. They only did them if they suspected trouble. I ask the Dr if he could tell me if the heartbeat sounded like a boy or a girl. He told me it sounded like a girl. Well I was just thrilled because I already had a boy and this would make my family complete. When I gave birth and they told me it was a boy I remember being disappointed and under the drug that they had given me I probably let my disappointment show in fact I know I did. As my son was growing up and even as young as maybe three he showed such feminine tendencies. He was nothing like my other son who liked sports and playing rough. He would get into my makeup and shoes and such. I was so afraid of what other people would say that I tried to do anything I could to get him to do boy stuff. He just wasn't interested and at that age he couldn't have understood. I even talked to a therapist about him and she said I was worrying to much and he was just going to be a sensitive and gentle person and not to worry. There was a teenage girl that lived in the neighborhood and she called him a fag at the toddler stage so it was very obvious that he wasn't like most boys. As he was growing up he went thru the same thing over and over again and my heart would break. He came home from school beat up and was teased and called names during his school years. I didn't know how to protect him so I kept telling him to stop acting like a girl he wasn't a girl, he was a boy and to start acting like one. Oh how that must have hurt him. I was telling him to be something he wasn't and to him he must have thought if my own mom doesn't like who I am. I have never felt so guilty or sorry for anything in my life. I had ask him a few times if there was something he wanted to tell me or talk about and I even came right out and ask him if he was gay. He always denied it and then one day He said yes and I was devastated. I already knew it but to hear it is so different. So many thoughts ran thru my head. What will everyone else say and oh my god what would his dad and his grandpa say. Would they except him? It scared me to death. There would be no grandchildren from him. Then there was the dreaded thought of oh my god what about aids. It took me a few days to kind of absorb it all and then I took on the task of telling his dad because I was afraid for my son to get the reaction that I thought he would get. I told him and he was great. He said he had known it for years also, and it would not change anything in his eyes. I was so relieved but I think if anything did change it was that we became a little more protective of him. We have and still do handle a lot of things with humor in our house, He is the first one to come in with the latest gay jokes and my other sons tease with him and make light of the situation but they would be the first to watch over him and stand up for him. My point is that thru it all there were a lot of tears shed and for a while I blamed myself. But when all is said and done he didn't grow up and choose that lifestyle. He was born with it and I have known it since he was a small child. I'm the mother and I knew it then and I know it now. Parents Please, Be there for your kids, understand that it is not a choice for them. It isn't what I would have chosen or what I wanted for my son but its what I got and I love him with all my heart. He is one of the most sensitive, carrying, gentle, compassionate people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing and he has taught me allot.

Letter 2




Abought Us Home Sweet Home Family Friends
Our Aids Memorial Buck's Music Page Simen's Music Page HOME
Kendallville City Directy Town Councle Our City Day Care Festivals Fireman's
Our Fun Times Our Golf Corces Ceader Point Holloweekend's Link's Page 1
Link's Page 2 Live Cams Buck's Military Yrs. My Thank You's
Slide Shows Awards 1 Web Rings The Best Time of the Year
Police Thrue the Eyes of a Mother
Vet's Memorial Our Commitment Cermony Buckskin's Very First Web Site
Our Personal Military Web Site



<