The Academy of Interactive Arts and Sciences held its third annual Interactive Achievement Awards on the first night of E3, and I must admit, the AIAS really tried to do it right. Held in the banquet hall of the Regal Biltmore, one of LA's oldest and fancy-pantsiest hotels, the Interactive Achievement Awards was a gala affair with silver plates of top-shelf h'ors d'oeuvres, flowing wine and at least three tuxedos.

Hosted by former comedian Martin Short, the overall presentation was muddled at best. The B-list celebs giving out the awards had no idea where they were or what these so-called "video games" are, and obviously haven't worked with teleprompters much. But the usual awards show shenanigans were present: musical numbers from Mr. Short, including a tune called "Anti-Trust Laws Is a Lady" performed in the guise of a drunken Bill Gates ... ugh; "celebrity" guest presenters like Ahmet Zappa, some betty from Days of Our Lives and Stevie Case; and uncomfortable banter read from a teleprompter. Poorly. There were a few unintentionally funny moments, and at least one intentional one -- a "Wazzup" video with Pikachu, Mario, Duke, Lara and one of the Sims guys. I know, I shouldn't have thought it was funny. But I did, and I don't care who knows it.

There were 29 awards in all, but in the interest of brevity I'll skip stuff like Outstanding Achievement in Sound Design Involving Cheese and Best RPG for Toddlers and get to the good stuff, adding a little unnecessary commentary along the way.

Outstanding Achievement in Game Design
This was a tough category: Age of Empires 2, NOX, The Sims, Gran Turismo 2 and Syphon Filter, all good games. In the end Will Wright took it, and The Sims landed the first of a handful of awards.

Outstanding Achievement in Game Play Engineering
AOE 2 and The Sims both made repeat appearances, along with NFL 2K and Crazy Taxi. The Sims won again, but only after an unbelievably lame envelope mix-up; that's right, the presenters (some sideline character from VIP and the founder of Huge Sound … or something) were given the wrong envelope. It was the first in a number of pathetic mistakes that managed to suck the suspense out of the entire event.

Console Action Game of the Year
Armada, Gauntlet Legends, Syphon Filter, Crazy Taxi and Super Smash Bros. were all nominated, making this another tough category. Lots of good games in there. Crazy Taxi won. No complaints.

Console Adventure/Role-Playing Game of the Year
Final Fantasy VIII, Legacy of Kain: Soul Reaver and Legend of Legaia. FF VIII took it. I almost passed out from the shock.

Console Fighting Game of the Year
The nominees are: Ready 2 Rumble, Super Smash Bros., WWF Wrestlemania 2000 and Soul Calibur. And the winner is: Soul Calibur! Again, I thought this was fair.

Console Racing Game of the Year
Crash Team Racing, Gran Turismo 2, Star Wars: Episode One: Racer and Driver. Hmm; Driver doesn't strike me as a racing game, but whatever you class it as, it was great. Gran Turismo 2 was a phenomenal sim, and CTR was good clean arcade racing at its best -- quite a shootout. So who won? Get this: Episode One: Racer! The front row rushed the stage in protest, but security hauled them off in handcuffs before they could do any damage. Fine, that didn't happen, but it should have. And things only got worse.

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