Mango's Party V2
This isnt exactly new information im giving out here people, BUT its midnight and sleeping doesnt seem like a good option, welcome to insomnia.

It was one of those nights, the kind of night that I'd look back apon and laugh and cry at the same time. Most peoples good weekends would start in the morning, have a nice breakfast, going out with the family maybe, going fishing, this however is not MY idea of a good weekend. My good weekends start at about 6pm with a car boot full of booze and smile on my face that everyone could clearly see a mile away. The night started as it generaly would, warnings from friends, a distressed mother pleading for the saftey of her house, this was normal.

To add a twist to an otherwise repeatative night, I had to be different, dressing up like a cowboy. The hat, the boots, the spurs, the gun, the shirt, i would have fitted into a Clint Eastwood movie without a glitch. I wasnt told that the party was a dress up but I assumed that they had just failed to tell me.

I got out of the car, spurs jingly like a quick draw match in a western movie, with alcohol in hand giggling like a school girl. The night was young, I was a cowboy and the women were plentiful.

I walked into the house, alcohol in hand. My friends loudly rejoiced " Jamie?! wheres the booze?!" they said in unison. "who cares?! ive got mine!" I said as i walked past them, holding my bottle proudly like a chalice. making sure a drop wasnt wasted.

The night progressed nicely, the alcohol had its usual effects, I was invunerable, I could have faught Mike Tyson and won in my mind. I thought everyone was hitting on me, including my same sex friends, in my mind I was a god.

All the girls there were models I thought to myself. I saw one girl, she was gorgeous, I am yet to see her sober but my friends confirmed this fact for me. With my eye set on the prize I decided to try and talk to her. "heyyourrealyprettyhowboutakissorsomethinghey?" Is all that managed to come from my mouth. She was not impressed with a drunk guy with the verbal ability of a toddler and breath that was quickly becoming a fire hazard, and she quickly blew me off.

"Dont worry" I thought to myself. "The night is still young... I mean... its only.... 2am!? .. I better do something and fast"
My plan of action was far worse than I could seriously contemplate in the morning. Verbaly abuse her friend. Not a good idea Jamie. Whats that? She's willing to let it slide? And she's being realy nice to you now Jamie? What should I do? Whilst the answer is blarlingly clear at this point in time. it wasnt at that moment and more verbal abuse ensued. The look of shear horror and what she said next I would remember forever. "YOU FUCKING ARSEHOLE! I WAS GOING TO HOOK UP WITH YOU?!"

What a night......
Holes in the wall? one
Empty Bottles? Hundreds
Spur marks? Thousands
Leasons Learnt? 0