Nobody Has to Know XII
The Price of Poker

Aries

August 2005

Disclaimers: Fox, Alex, Scully and Skinner belong to CC. No infringement intended.

The distant thump of bass filled the head of the man chained face-first to the wall. Only the intermittent crack of a whip and his own muffled cries interrupted the sound.

The music could have been part of the scene; heavy. Primal. But it came from above, where scores of others drank and danced and copulated in the darker corners of the building’s main room.

He couldn’t see the man at the other end of the whip. The leather hood over his head prevented it. But he’d seen him when he’d entered.

Tall. Long and lean muscled. Dark with hard, unreadable eyes. His dick had shot up quickly and painfully at the thought of the leather clad god disciplining him. It was rock hard even now as he took stroke after stroke, and he wondered hazily if there was any chance at all that his punisher would allow him to suck him off afterward.

He’d ask. Beg. And maybe, if he promised to make it really good...

The Dom looked at the clock on the wall and lowered the whip.

"Time’s up."

The smoky rasp went up the restrained man’s cock like a warm tongue. A few seconds later he was being released. When the hood was removed, he blinked in the sparse light then kneeled at the Dom’s feet. "Master," he managed in a rough whisper. "May I suck your cock?"

"No."

"Please? I promise, you’ve never had anyone suck your cock the way I can..."

Anger glittered in the Dom’s eyes, but he held it in check.

"Get up. Put your clothes on and get out."

The man knew better than to ask again. He did as he was told quickly and quietly, and he left the room with little more than a backward glance.

The door closed softly shut, and the man left behind put the vibrator that he was cleaning down and sank into the nearest chair. He stared at the floor for several minutes before lifting himself up and continuing on with his task.

"There he is."

C.J. belted down the rest of his drink and covered Mick’s hand with his own for half a second before rising from his chair. Taking a very deep breath, he turned and searched the crowded room.

"Where?"

"Right there." Mick pointed, his hand moving as their quarry stalked through the crowd. "Passing the bathrooms."

C.J. moved quickly then, intercepting the other before he could reach the exit.

"Hey, Alex."

"Hey," Alex replied distractedly, and he said nothing more.

"Heading home?"

"Yeah."

"Good."

"Why good?"

"Well...Fox must be pretty lonely. Y’know, with you here every night..."

"Fox is fine."

"Because he told you, or are you just guessing?"

"Why are you giving me the third degree, C.J.?"

All pretense of nonchalance disappeared. "Because I’m worried, man. You’ve been here every night for almost three weeks, down in that dungeon. This shit has gone on long enough, Alex. I can’t keep quiet any more, hoping that you’ll talk to me. What the hell is happening with you?"

"Nothing is happening with me."

"The fuck it isn’t! You’re leaving Fox home alone every damn night to be here, whipping men."

"You do it."

"It’s my part time job. And Mick is here. Not sitting somewhere else, alone and heartsick, wondering what he did wrong to make me not want to be with him."

"Really. And how do you know that’s what’s going on with Fox?"

"It has to be! I’ll bet my last dime on it. Why would you want to do him like this, Alex?"

No answer.

"I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but...here it is. If this is how it’s going to be from now on...you need to let him go."

"This from the man who drove me out of my mind when I was trying to do just that?"

"That’s when I thought there was some hope that you were going to work on dealing with your problems. But that hope fades more every night I see you in here without him."

"I could bring him with me," Alex said with a sarcastic lilt in his voice.

"And what? Leave him in the car with the window rolled down? Maybe if he’s a good boy and doesn’t make a mess on your leather seats, you’ll let him suck your dick while you drive home, then you can ignore him for a few more days."

"You’re getting real close to the edge, C.J.," Alex said, his tone full of dangerous intent. "I’d advise you to back off."

"You wanna beat me down, Alex, go ahead. But you know that this is wrong. You know you’re putting a hurtin’ on Fox that he doesn’t deserve. And you know that until you face your demons and allow yourself to be helped, this is going to spiral farther and farther out of control."

"Thanks, C.J. Really."

"He’s going to leave you, Alex," C.J. warned him again. "Or you’re going to break him down so completely that he’ll never again be who he was. Either way, buddy...you’re going to lose him."

C.J. was the first to walk away, leaving Alex standing there, staring out at nothing. He remained that way for several long seconds, then walked slowly toward the exit.

The door opened and closed without a sound, and the man on the bed went on sleeping undisturbed.

In the near darkness of the spare room, Alex looked down at Fox. His chest constricted as C.J.’s words echoed in his head. He knew they were true, but...

Fox stirred, sighing softly then turning onto his back. He’d risen far enough out of sleep to realize that there was a presence looming over him, and he opened his eyes. Alex’s dark outline came into focus, and he froze, simply staring up at the other man. When Alex said nothing and made no move toward him, he pulled the sheet down, exposing his nude body, and he slowly turned over and raised himself up on his knees, keeping his shoulders to the mattress.

Alex’s cock twitched and began to fill. That’s all it took. Not a word needed to be said, not a look needed to be given. In mere seconds, his body was ready to go. Just like it had been every night for almost three weeks.

He reached out, his fingers gently brushing the soft, pale skin of Fox’s rear. They brushed over each cheek, made a shallow foray into the darkness between them, then he withdrew his hand.

Fox made no sound. He didn’t move. He just waited. And he waited until Alex’s soft voice drew his attention.

"Turn over."

Slowly, Fox turned onto his back. But instead of looking up at Alex, he kept his gaze averted. Alex’s eyes left his face and drifted down the length of his body, coming to rest on his flaccid cock. He stared for a while then stripped off his leather jacket, tossing it onto a nearby chair. The rest of his clothing followed, and he was on top of Fox, pulling the older man into a deep kiss. Fox gave back just enough to keep Alex’s cock interested, but they both knew that his heart wasn’t in it. He’d stopped being able to get it up for Alex over a week ago, and he hadn’t been at all sure that Alex had even cared. And now, with Alex’s mouth feeding tenderly on his, and his hand slipping between them to whisper over his cock, he was too weary to hope.

For three weeks now Alex had been more distant than Fox had ever seen him. Every night he would disappear from the apartment with little more than an ‘I’ll be back later’, and he wouldn’t return until the wee hours of the morning sometimes. And when he did, he would come into the spare room where Fox now slept without exception, fuck him, get up and leave.

Now, with Alex kissing and stroking him, he wondered what had happened to make tonight any different. Whatever it was, he was sure it wasn’t anything that would last, and that knowledge further deepened his despair.

Alex’s mouth moved from Fox’s, kissing over his chin and down his throat, stopping to bite into the muscled padding of his shoulder. When there was still no show of interest from the other man’s cock, he lifted his head and turned a sharp gaze on Fox.

"What’s the matter?"

Fox kept his gaze shifted away from Alex’s face.

"Nothing."

"You’re still soft." It sounded more like an accusation than a concern.

Fox said nothing.

"Why?"

"I don’t know," Fox lied. "Maybe because I’m tired."

"Well, if you’re tired," Alex started, sounding not at all pleased, "go back to sleep." He lifted himself up, and Fox made a weak attempt at stopping him.

"You don’t have to...I...I mean...if you want to, I can..."

"Forget it," Alex said flatly. "I have no desire to fuck a corpse."

Tears stung the backs of Fox’s eyes, and he apologized.

"I’m sorry, Alex. I didn’t mean to..."

Alex reached the door and spun around.

"Is this the first time this has happened?"

So, he hadn’t even noticed. Fox stared, not knowing what to say.

"Is it?" Alex demanded.

"N-no, Alex."

"So, you lied about just being tired."

Fox looked away, chewing on his lower lip.

Alex stared for a moment then threw the door open and stalked out, slamming it shut behind him.

Fox jumped at the loud bang, then he closed his eyes and rolled himself into a miserable heap. On the other side of the door, Alex barreled down the hall and into the living room, where he came to an abrupt halt. He heaved a long, hard breath then bent over, resting his hands on his knees.

"Jesus."

He straightened up and looked down the hall at the closed door for a moment before clenching his fingers in his hair and stumbling back toward his own bedroom, where he dropped down on the mattress, burying his face in the silk-encased pillows.

It was all going to hell. C.J. was right. One way or another, he was going to lose Fox. And it would be all his fault.

The thought of coming home one day and not finding Fox there clawed at his insides, leaving a pain so raw, all he could do was curl himself around a pillow and wait for it to subside. He fell asleep before that happened, and sometime before dawn, the dreams came.

Fox blinked his eyes open, his sluggish, sleep-drugged mind trying to register the distant sounds he heard.

A voice. Pained and frightened, crying out for mercy. Begging to be left alone.

Alex was dreaming again.

Fox lay fully awake now, hands over his face, listening. He’d learned over the past few weeks to stay away, no matter how bad the nightmares were. The couple of times that he’d tried to comfort Alex had ended in Alex’s angry, almost violent rejection of his attempts at consolation. And though his psychologist’s mind told him that Alex’s reactions stemmed from what had happened to him and his inability to relinquish any ounce of control, his heart couldn’t understand. And it ached unbearably.

During the past week he’d seriously considered leaving, but every time he thought he had his mind made up, he’d look at Alex and see in his eyes a glimmer of the pain the other man was trying so hard to hide. And he’d decide to try a bit longer.

The anguished cries ceased, and Fox sighed softly, wondering as he did every night if Alex had remained sleeping or if the dream had awakened him, and he was now lying alone in his bed, shaking and in need of comfort that it seemed he would never allow Fox to give.

He’d been so close. The day he’d spilled his guts to Fox. Fox had been so sure then that together they were going to work things out, and that in time they would find happiness. Now he was sure of nothing.

Hugging his pillow tightly to his chest, he closed his eyes and tried to sleep.

Red rimmed eyes stared into the steaming pool of blackness. Alex stood leaning against the kitchen counter, hunched over his coffee, seemingly oblivious to Fox as he slipped into the room, dressed and ready for work. Eyes that matched his, risked a glance in his direction then skittered away as Fox began to speak.

"I have to..." He stopped, attempted to clear the gravel from his throat, then began again. "I have to drive to Culpeper today, s-so I’ll probably be late."

Alex’s eyes lifted to Fox’s face, and he noticed for the first time how tired the other man looked.

"How late?"

"I d...I don’t know. S-so, if it’s too late, I may have to get a room for the night."

Bloodshot eyes narrowed, but Alex said nothing.

"I’ll try to make it back tonight, though."

Still, Alex said nothing.

"I’ll call you if...if I..."

"Don’t bother."

Fox’s mouth fell open, and a soft click sounded in his suddenly tight throat as he tried to decipher the flatly uttered words.

"I...I don’t understand."

"You don’t have to call," Alex said simply. "Just tell me right now you’re not coming back tonight."

"But I don’t know that," Fox argued softly. "I might not be that late."

"Okay, let me put it this way," Alex countered. "Don’t come back here tonight."

Fox stared, his eyes filling with hurt and confusion.

"You...you don’t want me to come back? I...Alex, did I do something wrong?"

The mask of indifference Alex wore started to turn into something else.

"Culpeper isn’t that far. There’s no reason for you to have to stay there except that you really want to."

"...What?"

"You want to be away from here tonight. Maybe you’re working up to leaving all together."

Fox shook his head in mute disagreement. Alex continued, his agitation really beginning to show.

"If that’s where this is going to be heading, do us both a favor, okay, Fox? Go. Pack your shit right now and get the fuck out."

"No." Fox followed Alex as he chucked his mug into the sink, cracking it almost in two and whirled around, storming out of the kitchen. "Alex, I don’t want to leave. That’s not what this is..." He stopped in mid sentence as Alex came to an abrupt halt and spun around to face him.

"Back off, Fox. Go to work. Go to work and leave me the fuck alone."

"I can’t. I...Alex, please. Can’t we talk? This isn’t right. It’s not..."

"It’s not right?" Alex said, his tone deceptively soft as he moved closer. He stopped when he and Fox were a breath apart. "You’re my slave. A pretty fucktoy. Who are you to tell me what’s right?"

Deep frown lines creased Fox’s forehead, and his eyes glazed over. But he wasn’t ready to give up.

"Tell me about the dreams, Alex. Please," he whispered. "They’re doing this to you." One tear welled up and fell. "Don’t...don’t let them. You don’t want this. I know you don’t want this."

Fox thought he saw a tiny flicker of something in Alex’s eyes, but as soon as it had appeared, the light was smothered.

"You’re right. I don’t want this. You know what I want? Quiet. Peace and fucking quiet. Keep your mouth shut, suck my dick when I tell you to, bend over for me when I want to fuck you, and that’s it. Simple. If you can’t do that, get out."

The tears began to flow more freely, and Fox trembled with the attempt to stifle a sob.

Alex’s hands clenched into fists at his side, and he steeled himself against Fox’s tears.

"You’re going to be late." He turned his back and stalked in the direction of his bedroom. "Go to work. I’ll see you tomorrow. Maybe."

Alex disappeared into his room, leaving Fox alone with his misery.

Scully zipped up her laptop case and looked at her watch for the third time.

If he wasn’t there in ten minutes...

The office door opened, and Fox dragged in.

"Mulder, where’ve you..." Scully turned around and stopped in mid-sentence. "Mulder...what’s wrong? You look like hell."

"Scully, can you...can you handle this case yourself?"

"...Yeah, I...why?"

"I can’t go."

"What d’you mean, you can’t go?"

"I can’t go. I have to stay here."

"What for?"

"I have something to take care of."

Scully studied him for a moment then closed her eyes and sighed.

"Should I guess?"

No answer.

"Mulder..."

"Scully, please don’t start with me, okay?"

"I won’t start with you. Just...tell me why."

"He’s been really out of sorts lately, and I wouldn’t feel right if I left now."

"Out of sorts. Is he sick?"

"N-not physically, no."

"Ah, yes. The mysterious emotional issues."

"Can you handle the case alone?"

"Can I? Yeah. Should I? I’m not so sure. I’m feeling a little uneasy about the tone in your voice, Mulder."

"I’m fine. I just need to...I can’t leave him now, Scully. I can’t."

The redhead narrowed her gaze. "What are you afraid of, Mulder?"

Fox pressed his lips together and took a deep breath in through his nose before answering the question.

"I’m...I’m afraid that if I leave, he won’t let me come back."

"If he does that, then he didn’t want you to begin with."

Fox shook his head. "No. That’s not true. It’s his state of mind, Scully. If I go, he’ll feel like I’m getting ready to abandon him. And before I do that, he’ll cut me off."

"Preemptive strike?"

"Something like that."

"Well, if he’s stupid enough to..."

"You don’t understand, Scully. You just..."

"I’m sick of hearing that I don’t understand, Mulder. I want to understand, but you won’t let me."

Fox rubbed his forehead, trying to soothe the headache that had been steadily getting worse since this morning.

"Will you just...will you help me? Please?"

"All right, Mulder. I’ll handle the case. You handle Krycek. But remember what I said to you before. Please...for God’s sake, please. If he does anything to hurt you, walk. Run. And don’t stop until you’re as far away from him as you can get."

"Yeah. Okay...okay." How could he tell her he’d already been hurt more deeply by Alex’s behavior than any physical kind of attack could do?

Scully stared for a moment then turned to gather her things.

"Call me if you need to."

"I will."

She didn’t believe him, but what could she do? He was a grown man, and if this was how he chose to live his personal life...

Fox watched his partner grab her jacket and walk out. He leaned against his desk for at least ten minutes, staring at the floor, then, telling himself he’d better get to work, he moved to his chair and began sorting through the new items on his desk.

Ring.

Ring.

Fuck.

Ring.

Alex lifted his head and checked caller ID.

C.J. Again.

Letting the phone ring, he dropped his head back to Fox’s pillow, hugging the other, pressing it to his face so he could smell the other man’s lingering scent, and he closed his eyes.

Three o’clock.

Fox dropped the case file he’d been reading onto his desk and ran his fingers through his hair as he stretched. He’d read the same file twice already, and halfway through the third time, he realized that he wasn’t going to get any more work done today. Thoughts of the way he’d left Alex this morning, and the nagging fear that the longer he waited, the more chance he had of finding his belongings in the hall, crowded his brain and left no room for anything constructive. Clearing his desk, he grabbed his jacket and keys, locked up the office and started for Alex’s apartment.

Fox slowed his walk to a crawl as he approached Alex’s door. He carried with him the small travel case he’d packed this morning, hoping that he wouldn’t be ordered to take it, his other belongings and himself back to his car. He hadn’t called to tell Alex that he’d be back, and he wasn’t sure how Alex would react, but he was about to find out.

Alex bolted upright as the soft click of the front door broke the silence. He jumped off of Fox’s bed, and as he emerged from the bedroom, he saw Fox shutting the front door. Looking around the empty living room, Fox’s gaze then turned toward the hall, and made immediate eye contact with Alex as the younger man walked toward him.

"What’re you doing here?"

Fox’s gaze dropped to the floor between them.

"Scully went on the case without me."

"Why?"

"...I asked her to."

"Why?"

"I...I thought it was best for me to stay."

"Why?"

"Because I...I didn’t want to leave you."

Alex cocked his head slightly. "Why’s that?" Then he added, "It wasn’t so important to stay this morning."

"Being with you is always important to me," Fox argued softly. "I j...I just hadn’t considered that Scully could deal with the case herself. And...and I hated the way things were left this morning. I couldn’t leave with you so mad at me."

"I’m not mad at you. There. You can go join Scully now."

Fox stamped down the hurt that had just bubbled up at Alex’s words, and he shook his head.

"No. I-I’m not going anywhere."

"You’ll go if I tell you to go."

"Please don’t make me leave," Fox said softly, not looking Alex in the eye. "I don’t want to leave."

Alex crossed his arms over his chest and studied the other man. After a good long while, he spoke.

"It’s not about what you want...is it?"

Fox closed his eyes and swallowed hard before answering.

"No...no, Alex."

"You should remember that."

Fox said nothing.

"Go take that stuff off. Put on your collar and nothing else, then come back out here and kneel in front of me."

Eyes to the floor, Fox walked slowly past Alex and, even after he had disappeared into the spare room, Alex would not allow himself to react. He stood quietly, shutting himself off from the deluge of emotion that threatened to overtake him, and he waited.

In the bedroom, Fox removed his loosened tie, draping it over the back of the chair in the corner, and as he turned around, unbuttoning his shirt, his gaze fell on the bed, and he froze for a moment. When he regained the use of his legs, he moved toward the bed and looked down at the rumpled linens.

Alex had been lying on his bed. And from the vertical position of one of the pillows, it looked as though he’d been hugging it to himself. He’d probably been there right up until Fox had entered the apartment, or he would have straightened everything out before he’d left the room.

Fox closed his eyes, deep frown lines creasing his forehead. "Alex," he whispered in the direction of the empty bed. "Please let me in."

He finished undressing, put his collar on, then went out to find Alex. He located the younger man, standing by the balcony doors, staring pensively out at the city. Quietly, he approached, and when he came to within a couple of feet, Alex finally turned around.

Blinking as though he was actually surprised to find Fox standing there, he watched as the other man kneeled in front of him. He took a deep, slow breath and let it out silently.

"So. You blew off a case and your partner to stay with me."

"Yes, Alex."

"...Why?"

"Because I..." Fox bit his tongue. "...You’re my master. My place is with you. To do everything I can to please you. I haven’t done a very good job of that lately, and I want to make up for it."

"How do you plan to do that?"

"That’s for you to decide," Fox said to the floor.

Alex was silent for so long that Fox’s knees began to ache. He shifted uncomfortably, and Alex noticed.

"Get up."

Fox obeyed the soft command, and he stood before Alex, gaze still fixed on the floor.

"You want to stay with me? You’re staying. Except for when you go to work, you won’t leave this apartment. Do you understand?"

"......Yes, Alex."

"That was a long pause. Do you have a question?"

"I...what about when you’re not here?"

"If I want to take you with me, I will. If I don’t, you’ll stay here and wait for me."

Fox said nothing in answer, and when Alex turned and walked away, he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t have to wonder for long.

"Go shower then meet me in my room."

Fox obeyed, showering quickly then walking into Alex’s bedroom. where he found the other man gathering some objects from his dresser.

Heart thudding, he stood in the doorway, waiting until Alex turned around and pointed to a spot on the floor directly in front of him.

"You’re going to wear this until I decide to take it out," Alex said, holding up a black butt plug.

Fox swayed slightly. While the object wasn’t overly large, it wasn’t small by any means, and he imagined that it would be fairly uncomfortable if Alex made him wear it for any length of time, which, it appeared, was going to be the case.

A time not so long ago, his cock would have hardened instantly at the thought alone. But that was when Alex was interested in their mutual pleasure. Now, it seemed only about power and control. And though Fox understood the reasons for Alex’s behavior, it didn’t make it hurt any less. And the pain was so great it killed any arousal he might once have felt.

He followed Alex’s direction to climb up on the bed. He lowered his shoulders to the mattress and raised his hips and waited while Alex lubed the plug. His eyes closed, and he pressed his lips together, feeling himself being stretched and filled, and when Alex instructed him to rise, he did. He fought to keep the tears that threatened to spill over in check as the other man handed him a pair of tight, black underwear.

"Put these on."

Wincing at the discomfort in his ass, Fox bent over and pulled up the shorts. They did the job that Alex intended, holding the plug snugly in place, and Fox felt the heat of the other man’s stare.

"Very nice." Alex walked over to the dresser and leaned against it. "Remember that first night, Fox? The night you appeared here in my bedroom and asked to be mine? I was in bed. I can’t tell you the how I felt, seeing you crawl to me in those tight leather pants and that see through shirt." He took a long, audible breath and let it out. His hand went to the front of his jeans, undoing the button and zipper at the leisurely pace. "Crawl to me now, Fox. Slowly. Then kneel in front of me."

Fox sank to his knees and obeyed the softly uttered command. He stopped in front of the younger man, pulling himself up and keeping his eyes turned away from the hand that was now pulling out Alex’s very rigid cock.

"Put your hands behind your back. Keep them there. Now look at me."

Fox slowly lifted his gaze. Forced himself to look up into fathomless, dark eyes, and he waited. Alex grasped the base of his cock and brushed its head against his mouth, teasing the pouting flesh with light strokes.

"Do you know what would please me, Fox? Do you know what I miss? You...squirming and panting and begging for me to touch you. It wasn’t so long ago...do you remember?"

Fox swallowed hard and answered. "...Yes, Alex."

"Beg me now, Fox."

"...Please...please, Alex. Touch...me..."

"Try again." Alex tapped Fox’s mouth with his cock. "And make me believe it, this time."

"....I n-need you to touch me...please, let me...let me suck your cock..."

Another tap, this one aimed at his cheek, and delivered a bit less gently than the first.

"I’m not feeling it, Fox."

Fox whimpered but not with excitement. "I w-want to suck you, I...I n-need to. Please...please..."

The next tap stung.

"More."

"Give it to me. Fuck my mouth..."

Slap. "More."

"Ram it down my throat..."

"Yeah..." Slap.

Fox’s eyes snapped shut, and he flinched.

"Look at me." Another slap. "Keep going."

Fox couldn’t continue, but the blows kept coming, raining down on his face.

"Beg me!" Alex snarled, clearly out of control, now. "Come on, you little bitch. Don’t play innocent with me. You’re older than your years, aren’t you? You want it. You can’t get enough. Open your mouth. Open your mouth, you fucking little prick!"

Fox was crying now, openly weeping, but Alex didn’t hear him over the roar in his head. A violent climax overtook him, and he exploded, the geyser of viscous fluid coating one side of Fox’s face, then he slumped over, gasping for breath. Several second passed before he was able to straighten up. When he did, his eyes fluttered open, and he saw Fox still kneeling in front of him. Hands still behind his back, still looking up at him, his face drenched in semen and tears. He choked back a harsh grunt, and he pushed away from the dresser.

"Go clean up."

Fox hesitated for a moment then pushed himself to his feet, wincing at the discomfort caused by the hard rubber presence still in his ass. He shuffled slowly from the room, leaving Alex to recover alone.

Standing on shaky legs, Alex pressed his fingers into the corners of his eyes then slowly raked them through his hair. He took a few more moments, composing himself as best he could, then he zipped up his jeans and left the bedroom.

In the guest bathroom, Fox stood in front of the mirror, refusing to look at his reflection as he ran the water in the face bowl. He couldn’t think, he couldn’t react to what had just happened. All he could do was stare blankly down into the running water. Only the sharp slam of a door jarred him out of his trance. He washed his face and walked out into the living room, sensing that he was now alone in the apartment. Slowly, he walked from room to room, checking each and finding that he was indeed by himself. He began to tremble slightly but uncontrollably, and a chill came over him that he couldn’t seem to shake, so he made his way to the spare bedroom and crawled into bed. Pulling the covers up to his chin, he lay shivering until he fell asleep hours later. He didn’t hear Alex come in at almost three, and it wasn’t until he felt the blanket being pulled away from his body, that he awoke.

Blinking in the glare of the light that had just been turned on, he found Alex standing over him, gazing at him in silence.

"You can take the plug out now."

That was all Alex said before turning and leaving the room. He should have been pleased that Fox had obeyed his earlier command, but his tone held no such emotion.

Slowly, Fox peeled the skin tight short off then clenched his teeth as he worked the black plastic out of his rear. He wanted to hurl it across the room, but as the sound of it hitting the wall would probably bring Alex back into the room, he thought better of it. Instead, he slipped out of bed and took the thing into the bathroom.

There was an odd, empty feeling where the plug had been, and he shook it off, figuring that the sensation would go away by morning. He washed the plastic thoroughly, using hot, soapy water, dried it, and left it on the counter, then he crawled back into bed, shutting the lamp off before burrowing into the pillows. He lay there for almost two hours, his head swimming with thoughts of what had happened earlier this evening, and as the third hour approached, he pulled himself out of bed and went to the closet.

He stood in front of the door for an eternity then opened it and reached for his bag. Placing it on the bed, he returned to the closet for his clothes, but before he could pull one shirt off of a hanger, he stopped. Images of Alex lying on his bed, curled around his pillow filled his head and his heart, and he couldn’t do it. He returned the bag to the closet, and he sat heavily on the edge of the bed.

Scully would kill him, then she’d have him committed if she knew about tonight. He could hear her voice clearly in his head, furious and worried, and well, furious, telling him the things he apparently could never make himself believe.

Leave Alex and never see him again.

The thought of it made Fox’s insides constrict and his hands shake. He wouldn’t do it. More to the point, he couldn’t do it. He knew Alex had become an addiction, but his inability to leave after this proved to him just how much.

He let himself fall sideways, lifting his legs onto the bed, and he stared out at nothing until he fell asleep sometime near five o’clock.

Scully shouldered her way past the breakfast mob at the local coffee shop and practically fell out the door as more people pushed in past her.

"Sheesh.

White wax coated bag clenched between her teeth and her mocha latte in one hand, she unlocked the car door with the other. Once she was settled behind the wheel of her rental, she checked the time. Setting the cup in the pop out holder, she took her phone out of her pocket and hit Fox’s speed dial number.

"......Mulder."

"It’s me, Mulder. How are things?"

"Fine. How’s everything going over there?"

"I’ll probably be here until tomorrow. I have a meeting with the detective in charge, and I’ve got a couple of autopsies to do."

When Fox didn’t ply her with a barrage of questions, she knew something was up.

"Mulder..."

"Yeah?"

"Did something happen last night?"

"Happen?"

"Yes, Mulder. With Krycek. You don’t sound like yourself at all."

"I don’t?"

"No, you don’t. Now stop answering my question with more questions and tell me. What happened?"

"Nothing much, okay? He’s still out of sorts, and I just spent a restless night worrying about him."

".....Really?"

"Yeah." He hated lying to her. "Really."

"All right, then. I’m not entirely sure I believe you, but I’ve got no choice but to go along with you, do I? Would you like to hear about this case, now?"

"Yeah."

Scully filled him in quickly, they agreed to talk again before Fox left work, then Fox hung up and tossed his phone onto the surface of his desk. Sighing heavily, he rubbed at his eyes. Lack of sleep left them red and stinging, and rubbing them wasn’t helping at all. Deciding to try some cold water, he started to rise from his seat when his cell phone rang again. He groaned and mumbled into it, fully expecting to hear Scully’s voice again.

"Mldr."

"Fox? Hi."

"Hi.....C.J.?"

"Yeah. I uh...how are you? It’s been a while since anybody’s seen you."

"I’m okay," Fox answered softly and said nothing more.

"You don’t sound like it."

Silence.

"Fox, I...I don’t want to interfere, but...things just aren’t right with you and Alex; I know they’re not."

Still, Fox said nothing.

"I wouldn’t do this if...well.... somebody’s gotta do something. Fox...do you know where Alex goes every night?"

"...No. I didn’t know, but if you’re aware that he’s not staying home, I can only guess that it’s because he’s been at the club."

"Yeah."

"Is there...someone?"

"No. Not like you’re thinking. But he is spending every night downstairs. Things are bad, aren’t they?"

Fox paused a good long while before answering. "......Yes."

"I’ve tried to talk to him, Fox. The only thing I succeed in doing is piss him off. That’s only when he pays me any attention at all. I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this to you. I never thought I’d...you might have to consider leaving him. You’ve got to be miserable as hell, and you don’t deserve to be. I know you don’t want to, but I don’t know that you’ve got a choice any more other than to do something extreme..."

Fox didn’t hear much after that. As C.J. continued to talk, his mind began to click.

"...because it took you leaving before for him to realize how much he wanted you. I also know this is a different situation. It’s much more serious, and if you leave this time, it might be for good. God, I hate the idea of..."

"C.J., I gotta go. I ....I’m sorry to cut you off."

"Oh. Sure. Sure, Fox. Sorry, buddy. I know you’re at work."

"I’ll talk to you again. Sorry." Fox hung up and leaned back. Chewing on his thumbnail, he stared at the cluttered top of his desk and further considered C.J.’s words. He spent most of the day in contemplation, getting very little work done. So deep in though was he, that quitting time came and went, and when he finally realized what time it was, more than half an hour had passed since the time he should have left.

He bolted out of his chair, grabbed his jacket, and hurried out of the office. He locked the door and spun around, almost colliding with A.D. Skinner.

"Sorry, sir. I...have a good night."

"Agent Mulder, hold it a minute."

"I know it’s the weekend, and you’re obviously in a hurry to get out of here, but I just want to talk to you for a minute about your last report."

"Uh..." Fox looked from Skinner to the empty hall then back again. "Okay. What is it?"

Skinner motioned to the door with the file he held. "In your office, if you don’t mind?"

Fox hesitated then unlocked the door and let Skinner enter first. Checking his watch, he groaned inwardly and followed the other man into the office.

The sounds of Beethoven filled the otherwise quiet apartment as its only inhabitant paced the length of the living room. Checking his watch for the ninth time, he tented his hands in front of his mouth and continued to pace. The sound of the door opening stopped him in his tracks, and he watched as Fox warily entered.

"I’m sorry I’m late," the older man began, "but I lost track of time for a short while, and then, just as I was leaving, Skinner came in and wanted to discuss a case."

Alex just stared.

Fox blew out a silent breath and waited there in the doorway.

"Come here." Alex spoke the words softly and much too calmly. Fox advanced toward him, and he paused an uncomfortably long time before speaking again.

"We’ve been through this before, haven’t we?"

No sense in trying to give him excuses; he wasn’t going to listen. "Yes, Alex."

"Merely talking, obviously, hasn’t solved things, so I guess we have to try something else. Come with me."

Alex turned and headed into the hall, stopping when he sensed Fox had not followed. He stood with his back to the other man, waiting ten full seconds before Fox moved up slowly behind him, then he continued into his bedroom.

"Take your clothes off," he ordered softly while unbuckling his belt.

Eyes on Alex’s hands, Fox began to slowly undress, his hands shaking a bit as he removed his shirt. Expressionless eyes watched him as he took off the rest of his clothing, then Alex nodded toward the wall to his right. Fox moved over to it, and waited.

"Hands against the wall. Feet apart."

"Alex...Alex, please..."

"Do it."

He didn’t have to obey, dammit. He didn’t have to. He could tell Alex to go fuck himself, put his clothes on, get his shit together, and leave. He kept telling himself that even as he turned and faced the wall, placing his hands against the cool surface. His mind screamed it as Alex’s belt struck his ass.

"You’ll obey me, Fox." Another strike. "Do you hear me?"

Fox yelped as the belt hit again, this time catching the tops of his thighs.

"You’ll obey or I promise you, you’ll wish to God you had."

Fox pressed his lips together, trying to keep from whimpering as Alex continue to flog him. The final strike was the hardest yet, and his body jerked with the force of it. A pained, piteous sob sounded in his throat, and he had to consciously fight to keep from crying as Alex threaded the belt back through the loops of his pants.

"I didn’t cook anything, so we’re going out to dinner," Alex said in a conversational tone as he buckled the belt. Go shower and get dressed. Wear the clothes I put out on your bed, then meet me in the living room."

Forehead pressed to the wall, Fox tried to process what Alex had said to him. He heard the other man leave the room, but he didn’t move immediately. He stayed in Alex’s room for several minutes more, trying to compose himself. When he thought he’d sufficiently done so, he walked slowly out of the room, moving down the hall and into the spare bedroom. Lifting his eyes to the bed, he found the clothing Alex had put out for him. Picking up the underwear, he studied the sheer scrap.

He continued to talk to himself even as he dropped the underwear and walked into the bathroom.

He showered, wincing at the sting of the water on the red welts that had risen on his rear, and he put the clothing on. Wiping away the tears that had sprung to his eyes, he buttoned the shirt, then he walked slowly into the living room. Alex looked him up and down, then his gaze fell to the older man’s neck.

"Where’s your collar?"

"My..." Fox looked confused. "But we’re going out."

Alex stared straight at him. "Yes, we are."

Fox stared back, not really believing that Alex actually meant for him to...

When Alex didn’t blink, he lowered his eyes and crept past the younger man, toward the bathroom, where he’d left the collar. He lifted the leather strap from the counter, where he’d put it this morning and looked up at himself in the mirror.

He thought again of Alex lying on his bed, hugging his pillow, miserable, missing him, probably afraid that he really wouldn’t return, and he moaned softly.

Lifting the collar to his throat, he fastened the buckle with trembling hands then exited the bedroom. When he appeared in the living room, Alex approached and reached out. He stopped when Fox flinched away from his hand, and an odd look passed across his face before it went blank again. He undid the first three buttons on the black silk shirt, then he turned and walked toward the door. Fox followed, trailing him out into the hall, and stood in silence as Alex fastened the lock. He waited until the other man moved ahead at least three steps, then he followed him down the hall.

Alex sipped at his sparkling water then lowered the glass to the white linen covered table. Fox sat across from him in silent humiliation, gaze to the table so he wouldn’t have to see the looks he was surely getting by those who had noticed his collar. Alex watched him for a while then spoke.

"You haven’t touched your salad."

Fox paused for a moment then picked up his fork and speared some greens. Keeping his head down, he stuffed them into his mouth and chewed slowly.

"What’s wrong, Fox? Are you not hungry?"

"...Not really."

"Did you have a big lunch?"

"I didn’t have any lunch."

"Breakfast?"

"Some coffee."

"Well. You should be starving, shouldn’t you?"

"Yes, Alex."

"Why aren’t you?"

"...I don’t know."

"Sure you do...look at me."

Glazed eyes lifted and blinked at the other man.

"You’re embarrassed about the collar. You think people are staring at you."

No answer.

"Right?"

"...Yes, Alex."

Alex shrugged. "You don’t have to keep it on if you don’t want to. Go on. Take it off."

Fox eyed him warily.

"...Then you can go."

"....Go?"

Alex stared silently, and Fox realized what he meant. He felt the all too familiar sting of tears, and he lowered his head.

Alex sat motionless except for his right hand, which was repeatedly clenching around his rolled up napkin.

".......Are you going to take it off?"

Gaze still fixed on the table, Fox shook his head. The stinging passed, and he looked up at the other.

"No...no, Alex."

Alex relaxed slightly, and he dropped the napkin beside his plate. Reaching for his menu, he looked it over for the third time.

"Let’s order. Are you hungry?"

Fox opened his mouth to remind Alex of his answer to that question not more than three minutes ago, but, thinking better of it, he gave a different answer.

"...Yes, Alex."

When their meals arrived, Fox forced himself to eat most of his lasagna then sat quietly as Alex finished his chicken florentine. When the server came back around to see if anyone wanted dessert, Alex declined for himself and for Fox. He asked for the check, paid it quickly, then he preceded Fox out of the restaurant. Ten minutes into the ride home, he reached across the seat and stroked the underside of Fox’s chin, startling the older man.

"It’s a nice night. Let’s take a ride."

They drove until it was dark, then Alex pulled off into a secluded area and parked. Shutting off the motor, he turned to Fox. He stared for several minutes at the man who continued to gaze out into the darkness, then he spoke.

"Wanna make out?"

Fox’s eyes closed for a moment, then they reopened, and he looked Alex’s way.

"Are you asking?"

Alex was taken aback. Not so much by the question but by the tone in which it was posed. It’d been a long time since he’d heard that tone.

"Did it sound like a question?"

"Yes, but..." Fox stopped.

"Yes, but what?" Now Alex’s tone was changing from light to snippy.

Fox stood his ground. "That doesn’t mean anything. Do you actually want to know if I want to, or was it just your way, as it has been for some time, of saying I’m going to suck your dick, and/or you’re going to fuck me?"

Alex went from snippy to angry in nothing flat.

"Well, if it didn’t mean that, it does now." He jerked his pants open and grabbed Fox by the hair. As he attempted to pull the other man’s head down to his lap, Fox fought him.

"No. No."

Alex let his hair go and shoved him away.

"Get out."

"Alex..."

"Get the fuck out of my car!"

Defiance gave way to pleading. "Alex, please. Can’t we talk? We n...we need to talk. Please. I’m begging you."

"Do you want me to throw you out bodily?"

"What happened, Alex?" Fox rattled on, ignoring the threat. "What happened to change things? You said you wanted to fix what was wrong. You said you were going to try. You weren’t going to let them win. You were going to beat them. But it’s...it’s like you’ve given up before you’ve even really started. You’re shortchanging yourself. You’re shortchanging us."

"Us." Alex fixed a wild-eyed stare on the other man. "Do I have to say this to you again? You’re nothing more than a toy. You got that? My property. Chattel. In short, my slave. And you’re a fucking lousy one at that! There’s no us, Fox." He couldn’t stop the crack in his voice as he uttered those last words. He started the car and slammed it into gear.

Fox went silent, choosing not to escalate the situation any further. The tires threw up a shower of dirt and gravel as Alex floored the gas and sped back toward home. Fox kept his eyes averted for the duration of the ride, and when they arrived back at the apartment, Alex came to a screeching halt in front of the building. He kept his eyes fixed straight ahead.

"Get your stuff." His voice was low and barely controlled, "Then go. Leave the key under palm by the door."

"...Are you throwing me out?" Fox asked in a calmer voice than Alex would have predicted.

"Call it what you want," the younger man answered not looking Fox in the eye. "Just leave."

Fox looked down at his folded hands for a moment then opened the door and lifted himself out of the car. He barely got the door shut when Alex took off, tires squealing. He watched the vehicle disappear from sight, stood quietly for a few more minutes, then he turned and walked into the building.

"Nooo!"

"I’m tellin’ ya." C.J. stopped to chuckle. "You should have seen his face when I..." He stopped, immediately noticing Lucas’ attention had turned somewhere else. He spun in his seat as did Mick, and they searched the crowd, finding the focus of their friend’s stare.

"Shit."

"I guess your talk with Alex didn’t do any good," Lucas said.

"Of course not," C.J. sighed. "I was hoping that my talk with Fox would have, though."

"When’d you talk to Fox?" Lucas asked, watching Alex disappear past the door at the back of the club.

"Earlier today."

"What’d you tell him?"

"I asked him if he knew where Alex has been going every night, and he figured it out. Then I spoke to him about what we were talking about."

"You really did suggest that he leave Alex?"

C.J. nodded.

Lucas sighed. "God. What did he say?"

"I don’t think he wanted to hear it. He kinda cut me off...said he had to go."

"You can understand why," Mick said softly, stroking C.J.’s arm. "He loves Alex so much. It must be the toughest thing in the world to walk out on someone you love."

"I know," C.J. murmured. "But what does love mean if only one person is in it?"

"Alex loves Fox," Lucas reminded C.J. "He didn’t do what he did to Shane and his friends just because they were fooling around with his property without his permission."

"I know," C.J. moaned, running his hand over his head. "But since then Alex has done a hundred and eighty degree turn in the wrong direction, and he just isn’t seeing the hurt he’s causing."

"Or he does, and something is preventing him from stopping," Mick offered.

"Either way, Fox sticking around isn’t doing any good. I don’t know what approach he’s taking, but whatever it is, it isn’t working. He’s way too close to this to be objective or effective. The only thing left for him to do, I think, is to get the hell out of Dodge. Sometimes, self preservation has to be the most important thing."

Lucas lowered his head.

"Don’t think that’s easy for me to say," C.J. said to the little blonde. "One day Alex will snap out of this and realize just what he’s lost. And he’s going to be in a worse hell than the one he’s in now."

"Isn’t there anything we can do," Lucas asked, "to stop it from getting to that point?"

"If anybody can think of something new to try, I’m all ears," C.J. answered, stopping to thank the server, who’d just brought a second round of drinks. The small group fell silent then, mulling over the current situation while they nursed their drinks. Nearly half an hour had passed when Mick looked around the club and frowned.

"Wonder what’s so interesting."

C.J. surveyed the room and noticed that the attention of a good many men was directed toward the front entrance. He shrugged and looked back down into his almost empty glass.

"Probably just some fresh meat."

Several seconds passed when a loud gasp from Lucas snapped C.J.’s and Mick’s heads around.

Jaws dropped when the object of the other patrons’ attention came into clear view. Three pairs of eyes followed the tall man wrapped in skin tight leather through the crowd, and it wasn’t until he stopped in front of their table and trained a steady hazel gaze on C.J. that any of the seated men moved.

Mick spun in his seat to stare up into Fox’s face, and Lucas leaned across the table so he wouldn’t miss anything.

"Where is he?"

From his tone to the look in his eyes, to the clothes that screamed ‘Dom’, everything about Fox said to the three seated before him, that he meant business.

C.J.’s mouth curled into a slow smile, and he nodded toward the back. Without another word, Fox turned and headed toward the rear door. All eyes followed as he prowled through the crowd, and Lucas whimpered audibly as he saw one gloved hand reach into the pocket of the black jacket and pull out a pair of handcuffs and what looked like a long, slim rope.

"Shit. Ohhhhh, shit."

"Gentlemen," C.J. murmured, still smirking as he watched Fox disappear through the door, "the price of poker has just gone through the roof."

End chapter twelve