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2004/2005 - chatroom masturbation
I HAVE BEGUN TO REALISE THAT AMONG THE VARIOUS HABITS BAD AND OTHERWISE I HAVE PICKED UP IN LIFE, AN ADDICTION TO INTERNET CHATROOMS AND FORUMS IS ONE OF THEM. The addiction began in the years 2003 and 2004, a time when I had a lot of free time on my hands, and one of my big hobbies was to go online looking for conversation and communion. Before too long, I had begun spending a surprisingly large amount of time thinking about what I was going to say the time I logged on, crafting my replies in my mind, and even dreaming of chatrooms when I was asleep. It all happened so fast -- within a few days I was addicted, to the point where I was dreaming about the Internet... how sick is that? However, the experience, though mindless and unsatisfying, has given me some vital clues to understanding human nature in the modern era. In particular, it has inspired me to develop a new form of art, an attempt to introduce the element of reality into the otherwise VR world of the Online Chatroom! I have decided to become that bane of Everyone's Existence -- a Chatroom Troll!

Internet chatrooms and BBSs (bulletin board services) represent the masturbation of communication. As in jerking off to porn pictures, there is no real communication or communion going on. Chatrooms satisfy a need -- that of real communication, an essential human need -- but you might as well as be talking to a wall. It is like sending your opinions out into the void.

However, chatrooms and forums do have their benefits -- if you can avoid being sucked into them. In fact, I am beginning to think that chatrooms and forums could become my artistic medium, a part of my plan to become an Internet presence. I am thinking of recreating myself as an "Internet Terrorist", a "Chatroom Terrorist", in the spirit of Hakim Bey's "Poetic Terrorism". In Poetic Terrorism, Hakim Bey (a notorious American anarchist) writes:

The audience reaction or aesthetic-shock produced by PT (Poetic Terrorism) ought to be at least as strong as the emotion of terror-- powerful disgust, sexual arousal, superstitious awe, sudden intuitive breakthrough, dada-esque angst--no matter whether the PT is aimed at one person or many, no matter whether it is "signed" or anonymous, if it does not change someone's life (aside from the artist) it fails.

PT is an act in a Theater of Cruelty which has no stage, no rows of seats, no tickets & no walls. In order to work at all, PT must categorically be divorced from all conventional structures for art consumption (galleries, publications, media). Even the guerilla Situationist tactics of street theater are perhaps too well known & expected now.

An exquisite seduction carried out not only in the cause of mutual satisfaction but also as a conscious act in a deliberately beautiful life--may be the ultimate PT. The PTerrorist behaves like a confidence-trickster whose aim is not money but CHANGE.

Don't do PT for other artists, do it for people who will not realize (at least for a few moments) that what you have done is art. Avoid recognizable art-categories, avoid politics, don't stick around to argue, don't be sentimental; be ruthless, take risks, vandalize only what must be defaced, do something children will remember all their lives--but don't be spontaneous unless the PT Muse has possessed you.

Dress up. Leave a false name. Be legendary. The best PT is against the law, but don't get caught. Art as crime; crime as art."

In almost all of these respects, my recent cyber attack launched against the GaijinPot forum qualifies as Poetic Terrorism. In retrospect the attack has filled me with an exhilaration and sense of accomplishment, which can mean only one thing -- I gave birth to a work of art, even though that was the last thing I was planning. It was not a conventional work of art by any means, but a real work of art, more authentic than anything I could have contrived had I (for example) sat down and tried to write a poem. It was a very mysterious experience arising from the nexus of coincidence and intent, and the message was sublime.

Before I go on to describe this first GaijinPot attack, first allow me to dispel some myths and stereotypes regarding the archetype of TROLL. Chatroom trolls have a bad name and it is considered to be an insult to be called one. However, I think trolls are in fact a very healthy and beneficial archetype, for they represent the TRICKSTERS OF THE INTERNET WORLD. I quote a very knowledgable source,

What exactly is an internet troll? The basic definition for a troll is any remark designed to attract predictable responses, actions, or flames. It can be argued that any flame is a form of trolling, however all troll posts are not necessarily flames. Insults and flames, while very effective, are simply one element of trolling. The term troll derives from the phrase "trolling for victims" which in turn comes from mainstream trolling. Mainstream trolling is to fish by trailing a lure or baited hook from a moving boat. The particular bait used by a newsgroup troll varies depending on his targets and intentions. Trolling can mean a lot of things to different people, and the methods employed by trolls can also be applied to other areas as well. However, the term "trolling" in the context of this article refers to the most common form of trolling; which is trolling for entertainment purposes and treating it as a game. Like all games, there is a goal. Trolling is not that dis-similar to a typical Role Playing Game. In this game the Trolls are the predators/villains while the civilians are unarmed participants to be manipulated and controlled as the troll sees fit.

However, caution should be took in separating the recreational trolls from the psycho trolls. Psycho trolls generally stay in the same newsgroup or a related community of newsgroups for extremely long periods of time. As opposed to those trolling for recreation, psycho trolls are generally out for revenge against a select few, or maybe everyone, who he feels has done him wrong. Psycho trolls often are mentally or emotional disturbed and may not even realize that they're trolling. To psycho trolls, what happens on the internet is very real and personal. On rare occasions real trolls will also fall into the above category and will possess the same traits. These are the sore-losers and bottom feeders of the troll community.

The most basic form of trolling is to submit a post that will attract the most possible amount of responses, negative or argumentative replies usually preferred, and then to sit back and bask in the chaos that has been created. This troll is simply out for immediate scoreboard and a quick win is enough to satisfy him. The tactic is basic, relatively uncreative, and only touches the surface of what a troll can really do; yet its effective in accomplishing its singular task--to attract attention and garner as many responses as possible. The content delivered by this type of troll generally falls into several areas; It may consist of an obviously foolish opposition of common knowledge, many intentional offensive insults or flames directed to the readers of a community, or a blanket generation on a specific category which is sure to attract a large number of argumentative replies.

So, what exactly am I trying to say here? Well, basically -- Internet chatrooms are traps for the unwary, and despite their glamor and glitz offer no real chance of communion or communication. To call anonymous chatrooms a "social" environment is the same as calling pornography "real sex". I have taken it as my goal, to inject a dose of reality into the Chatroom structure, and highlight the illusory nature of the Internet experience. I want to bust it all open, and open the People's consciousness a little in the process. I have decided to become an Internet Troll! I want to change the World, and I want to change the Word. How is that possible?

Click here and see my first ever troll enlightenment attack, launched against the unsuspecting poor folk at! It could change your life!

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