Card carrying member of the VRWC

She must've seen the Ark of the Covenant

9/24/2004 - Tear-RAY-Za is a crazy bitch!

One thing Kerry doesn't need right now in his campaign is a crazy old rich bitch going around making him look like more of an ass than he already is. If I were him, I'd get out the muzzle and plead nicely for her to shut the hell up so I could still get my allowance.

Anyways, here's a few things the "bag lady of the radical left" has said.

In February, Teresa Heinz Heinz refered to herself as "an African-America", G Dawg Mon-ah foo.

Also a few days later, she said that "America would gladly accept" gay marriages. You go, girlfriend!

In March, The Ketchup Queen said she'd use her Heinz dollars to pay for Lurch's campaign. Excuse me, but isn't that illegal now??

Because her husband is a major super athlete, she ordered the Secret Service to find an agent who could windsurf to accompany Kerry.

Famous Idiot has a lot more where that came from.

Now why the hell would she consistantly act like an ass? Friends with the Clintons perhaps? Well, who knows. Why don't you ask her yourself. Maybe she'll tell ya to "SHOVE IT" or not.

More scumfucking Islamofacists showing they represent a "religion of peace".

9/23/2004 - Today's thoughts on Iraq

The last week has been very bad for our side. Two more innocent Americans have been beheaded, and the terrorists have a British man begging for his life to the British government to release female terrorists. Not to mention alleged murders of two Italian aid workers.

Personally, I can't wait until after the elections and hope that Bush takes off the kid gloves, fends off the PC bullshit and blast these terrorist sonsofbitches back to the Stone Age where they damn well belong! They're trying to sway opinion here, and they know they can turn Iraq into another Vietnam if they try, so they slaughter as many innocents (many who are which trying to HELP the Iraqi citizens!) as possible and as ghastly as they possibly can, and if we leave, then it'll turn into a full-fledged terrorist state.. and maybe possibly worse than under Saddam. I know I'm speculating here, but let's remember what happened in 1991 when we left after the UN denied us permission to go into Iraq. Hundreds of thousands of Kurds and Shi'ites brutally killed. You liberals claim to favor human rights, right? So just think of what will happen if we just dropped everything and left. Does that make sense to you?? These wastes of sperm are trying to break our resolve just as the Vietcong and the liberal media and protesters did 30 years ago. Now, I'm not like that, and neither are the majority of Americans. But if we lose our resolve, the terrorists will have won. Yes, it's terrible what happened to these poor people, and my thoughts and prayers go out to their families, but we have to see that Iraq gets rebuilt better than it has before, that we win the hearts and minds of the Iraqi people (whom mostly support our presence there), and nab these shitsuckers out there who want to disrupt the democratic process in Iraq by murdering civilians.

Remember folks, appeasement does not bring peace. It brings only more terror. It's time for us to stand tough.

If I haven't swayed any lefty on this.. please read what John Hawkins has to say about this.

If your favorite Marx brother was Karl.. ya might be a liberal.

9/21/2004 - EVEN MORE You Might Be A Liberal

I really appreciated the e-mail I got about my previous "You Might Be a Liberal" page, so I decided to do some more. Enjoy!

You Might Be A Liberal If...

You think homophobia is a far worse social disease than herpes.

You think Hillary and her village are better off raising your kid than you.

You speak out on the "evils of corporate America" but spend a great deal of your time at Starbucks.

You think the miltary ought to be holding bake sales to pay for weapons.

Your chest is scratched like one of Freddy Kruger's victims after hugging to many trees.

Your favorite Marx brother was Karl.

You take pride in owning a VW bus rather than a 2004 SUV (and still owe 10 more payments).

You think that a few more months of U.N. sanctions and Saddam Hussein would fold like rookie poker player.

You think anyone who doesn't find Will & Grace funny is a homophobe.

You think that it's wrong to execute a convicted serial killer, but abortion on demand is a constitutional right.

You think it was a strech for Rob Reiner to play a liberal in "All in the Family".

You believe in more conspiracy theories about Bush than the X-files could come up with.

You think the black middle class was just a myth started by Newt Gingrich.

You pray to "The Woman Upstairs".

You really believed Al Gore invented the internet.

You look at Yassir Arafat as a "man of peace".

You think that Bush is a flip-flopper, but Kerry is the epitome of consistancy.

Her for president in 2008?

9/20/2004 - Beat Hillary! Join the VRWC!

Remember back during Bill Clinton's "Oralgate" when Hillary told NBC Saddam cheerleader Katie Carsick that Bubba porking his intern was just all part of a "vast right-wing conspiracy"? Think she was full of shit? Well, yeah.. sure... WE took Bill's dick out of his presidential briefs and fed it to Monica. Yeah, right! Well, we might not have done that, but we are out there, and if you want to see if you can be a member, take the Right-Wing Conspiracy test!

1. The person best qualified to choose my doctor, my kid's teacher, what to eat, and whether or not I should smoke is:

A. Hillary Clinton's village

B. The Supreme Court

C. My damn self!

2. Who was the best president of the last 30 years?

A. Jimmy Carter! Maliase Forever!

B. Bill Clinton

C. Reagan. His face should be put on Rushmore.

3. Which countries should have nukes?

A. None. You can't hug with nuclear arms.

B. The UN should decide that.

C. The U.S. and our allies.

4. The military budget should be:

A. Cut. Let them hold bake sales to buy their new bombers.

B. Subimtted to the UN for approval

C.As high as it needs to be to repel threats to our nation and its allies.

5. Fill in the blank: Taxes should be _______

A. High. Don't you have any compassion for the poor?

B. Cut, but not for the rich

C. Low. Employees have a right to enjoy the fruits of their labor.

If you answered "A" to all of the questions, then you have just been deemed king/queen of Hillary's village, and are banished to a life of idiotic socialism. If you answered "B", then you need help. About a month of listening to Rush Limbaugh and reading Coulter or Hannity's books should make you halfway normal. If you answered "C", then you did good. Go get your offical membership certificate, and check out Mark W. Smith's book, The Offical Handbook of the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy. It's packed full of the typical looney left's arguments, and how to make them look like the ignorant jackasses they are. A real good read.

UPDATE: More "You Might Be A Liberal" coming later this week. In the meantime, check out the first edition.