“They’re cute together,” Brian remarked. “They work well together.”
“I guess...” Howie said, a twinge of jealousy streaming into his voice.
“All right, what’s up, D? You’ve been acting weird since he showed up tonight,” AJ asked.
“I don’t know... I’m just afraid I’ll lose her to him.”
“But why? They’re only friends, and she’s with you now.”
“They used to be together... He used to live with her.”
“So they used to live together? So we and that doesn’t mean anything...”
“Bone, I think D’s saying that they used to be together,” Nick broke in.
“Oh...”
...
“Hey folks!” Mary called into the microphone. “I know most of y’all don’t remember me, I haven’t been here for a while, but if you do from, like, two years ago, you remember my helper, Josh,” she said, pointing to him. “He finally came home.”
“Just to help you, Mary,” he laughed into his microphone.
“But anyway,” she laughed, “now we can do some of our old songs. I want to start with ‘Hotel California,’” she said, turning to him.
“Sounds good to me.” The two started playing, Mary on her acoustic guitar, Josh on a bongo he borrowed from Brian before they left the house. The sound melded perfectly.
...
“On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night
“There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself,
'This could be Heaven or this could be Hell'
Then she lit up a candle and she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say...
“Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
Plenty of room at the Hotel California
Any time of year, you can find it here
“Her mind is Tiffany-twisted, she got the Mercedes Benz
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys, that she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat.
Some dance to remember, some dance to forget
So I called up the Captain,
'Please bring me my wine'
He said, 'We haven't had that spirit here since nineteen sixty nine'
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...
“Welcome to the Hotel California
Such a lovely place
Such a lovely face
They livin' it up at the Hotel California
What a nice surprise, bring your alibis
“Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said, 'We are all just prisoners here, of our own device'
And in the master's chambers,
They gathered for the feast
The stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can't kill the beast
“Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
'Relax,’ said the night man,
We are programmed to receive.
You can checkout any time you like,
but you can never leave...” *
*"Hotel California" by The Eagles
The group made their separate ways back to their cars to head back to the house. “Where are you staying tonight?” Mary asked.
“I’ll probably find a place, somewhere,” Josh responded, kicking at some dirt.
“Wait here.” Moments later, she returned to her car and unlocked the doors. Howie climbed in the front passenger seat and AJ hopped in the back. “Hop in Josh, you’re staying with us.”
...
The group stayed up until midnight when the Boys decided to go to bed. “I’m going to stay up with Josh,” Mary said, kissing each of the Boys goodnight. “I’ll be up in a bit,” she promised Howie and kissed him gently.
“Don’t be up too late,” he warned. “Night Josh, good to meet you.”
“You too, Howard.” The Boys went upstairs and Mary sat back on the couch when she heard five separate doors closing. She looked at Josh and smiled. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“You’re thinking something, Stevens, what is it?”
“Nothing, I’m just glad you’re back. I really missed you.”
“I missed you too,” he said, moving closer to Mary, taking her right hand in his left. He smiled at her and gently caressed her cheek with his right hand. Mary closed her eyes and lowered her head into his hand, sighing.
“I missed your touch,” she confessed.
He just smiled at her and brought her closer, until their foreheads were touching. “I just missed you, immensely. And I never got my ‘Hello kiss,’” he smiled.
“The guys don’t know about the ‘Hello kisses,’ just the goodnight ones. The ‘Hello kisses’ were between us.”
“Well I don’t see them anywhere right now,” he whispered.
“But... what about Howard?”
“It’s just a kiss between friends... I won’t tell.”
“Neither will I,” she promised and leaned in, kissing him softly, quickly.
“That’s not the kiss I remember, Stevens...”
“Then what is?” she asked playfully.
“This is,” he said, pulling her close, kissing her gently, lovingly. Josh parted Mary’s lips with his tongue and sought for hers.
After a few minutes, they separated, Mary looking for her breath. “I’m sorry, Josh, but I can’t do that...”
“But we’re just friends...”
“I know, but Howard’s right upstairs.”
“Then we’ll go somewhere else,” he whispered. Mary nodded and went upstairs.
“Howard?” she asked, nudging him gently. “Howard...”
“Mphmf?”
“Me and Josh are gunna go out for a walk, we’ll be back in a little bit.”
“Be good...”
“I will, promise,” she said, kissing him softly. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her onto the bed with him. “Howard?”
“I just wanted to say I’m sorry, Mary.”
“For what?”
“For acting like an ass earlier, I shouldn’t be jealous of Josh, you’re just friends.”
“Exactly, I love you Howard and I won’t ever leave you for anyone.”
“Love you too. Don’t be out long.”
“I won’t, I promise.”
Once outside the house, the two walked towards Mary’s apartment. “Wow, this place brings back memories,” Josh said, seeing the building looming before him. “It’s been a while.” They walked up four flights of stairs to the top floor and Mary unlocked the door. They walked in and shut the door. Mary was taking off her shoes by the door when she felt Josh’s arms around her. “Damn, I missed you, Mary...” he said, nuzzling her neck. She fell back into his embrace and enjoyed the moment.
“I missed you, too...” She opened her eyes slowly. “Oh God,” she said and tried to pull away. “I can’t do this, I’m with Howard...”
“Sshhh... Mary... Just relax... for one night, let’s make it how it used to be... No one has to speak a word...” he whispered, continually kissing her neck, nibbling her ear.
“But... Howard...”
“I won’t tell if you won’t... Does he know about us and how we used to be?”
“Not everything,” she sighed her breathing ragged.
“Then he doesn’t have to know...”
“I can’t lie to him...”
“If he doesn’t ask, don’t tell...” Mary sighed again and leaned back into Josh’s arms. “That’s my girl...” He carefully slid his own shoes off and picked Mary up, carrying her into her bedroom. “Remember our last time together in this room?”
“It was amazing... you made me feel so beautiful.”
He gently laid her on the bed and crawled up close to her. “You are beautiful, Mary. I know it, Chas knew it, I just have to get you to believe it...” He leaned in and kissed her again.
“You made me feel... so wonderful inside, ya know? I felt like I was a real woman, like I wasn’t something to be thrown away...”
“That’s because you’re not, Mary. You are a beautiful,” he paused kissing her, “wonderful,” kissing her, “very sexy woman.” She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him to herself. She kissed him passionately, their tongues exploring one another’s mouths.
“Thank you, Joshua...”
“I love it when you call me that,” he said huskily, kissing her neck.
She moaned his name again when he nibbled on her ear. “You... know... what... that... does... to... me...” be barely breathed.
“You know what you do to me,” he muffled to her neck. He kissed across her collarbone, ever so slowly. She squirmed beneath him. He smiled, and softly kissed her again.
“We’ve come this far, don’t tease me, Joshua.” He kissed her again and moved his hands down her sides. He slid his hand up her tank top and rested it on her breast, caressing the soft flesh. She struggles beneath him and finally sat up, She pulled the shirt over her head and wrapped her arms around him. “Can’t have my shirt all stretched,
Howard will think something happened,” she whispered.
“I’ll keep your secret,” he responded, kissing her. His kisses moved from her lips, down her neck and into the valley between her breasts. He straddled her hips and sat up, looking at her. He gently ran a finger along the scar on her stomach. “This never went
away,” he sighed, shaking his head. “I wish I was here to protect you.”
“No matter, he’s in jail now, 50 to life for murder, plus five for beating me up in Georgia, crossed state lines while on parole.”
“I should have been here.”
“He would have hurt you. I was the one involved with him, I was the one hurt.”
“He could have killed you.”
“But he didn’t. And I don’t want to get back to late, Joshua...” but before she could finish his name, his lips came into contact with her skin. He fumbled a hand around her back and unclasped her bra. Leaning back down, his took a nipple into his mouth and suckled it like a baby. “Oh, Joshua...” she moaned through clenched teeth, not wanting to make too much noise. He gently bit and tugged at her right breast while fondling the other with his hand, squeezing and pinching the tender area. She came close to the edge of orgasm from his touch and he slowed down, sitting up against her hips. He took his own shirt off, revealing a tattoo he got when they were together. A red banner with “Mary Forever” written in it was printed at the end of his ribcage, just above his stomach in the center of his torso. “You still have that?” she asked, breathlessly. “What do you tell the other girls?”
“There haven’t been any others since you, Mary.”
“But there is no forever, Joshua... You know that.”
“We’ll always have nights like this, just for us, and they last forever. I never stopped loving you, Mary. I still love you.”
“So do I, but I’m in love with Howard...”
“I understand. We’ll have this night and that will be all, if that’s all right with you.”
“I love Howard, but I missed you so much, Joshua, your touch...”
He took a ring from his finger. “I wanted to give this to you last time, but I forgot to, and then I left...” he slid the ring onto her index finger. “To tonight,” he whispered.
“To tonight.”
He kissed her again and moved his hand down her stomach to the button of her jeans. Carefully, he undid the button and zipper and pulled them off. “Black lace underwear... planning something for tonight?”
“Howard and I made love for the first time last night, I was hoping to make tonight a second.”
“You can with me,” he whispered into her ear and slid the panties from her hips. He teased her a few more minutes before removing his own jeans and boxers.
“I’m still on the Pill, Joshua...”
He slowly slid himself inside her, their bodies becoming one. She wrapped her limbs around him, never wanting to let go again.
...
They both sighed in relief and held each other tightly. He gently wiped the sweat from her forehead and laid her head next to hers. “I love you, Mary,” he whispered.
“Always, Joshua.”
...
They returned to Howie’s house a little later. “We’ll always have tonight,” he whispered in her ear once they were inside.
“Always,” she smiled and kissed him gently. She hugged him tightly and held him close, resting her head on his shoulder. She pulled away. “Goodnight, Joshua.”
"Goodnight, Mary.”
She smiled and turned to talk up the stairs. She took the first step when she felt someone’s gaze on her. She looked up and her jaw dropped. “Howard...”
“We’re fine, just went for a walk.”
“Come on, let’s go to bed.” He put his arm around her shoulders and guided her into the bedroom gently. “I couldn’t sleep after you left,” he confessed.
“Why?” she asked, taking her jeans off, getting changed for bed.
“I don’t know, I just missed you... and that whole jealousy thing... It wouldn’t let me sleep,” he sighed.
“No need to worry now, Howard,” she smiled and took her tank top off.
Howie looked up at her, watching her look for her nightshirt. “It’s over here, remember?”
“Thank you, Howard,” she said, walking towards him.
“Nuh uh, you gotta get through me first,” he played.
“Please Howard?” she whined.
“But you look so good... I mean, how often do I get to see a beautiful woman standing before me in just her bra and black lace panties?”
“More often from now on,” she whispered, kissing him.
He took her hands in his and kissed her fingertips. “What’s this?” he asked suddenly, indicating the ring Josh had given her.
“Josh gave it to me, he said he was going to give it to me a long time ago, but then we had the argument...” she paused the moved the ring around on her finger, “and he gave it to me tonight. You don’t mind, do you?”
“No, no, not one bit,” he lied. “It’s just a friendship ring, right?” he asked, the nervousness creeping into his voice.
“Just a friendship ring,” she agreed. “And you have something of mine that means more than anything.”
“What’s that?”
“My heart. I love you, Howard.”
“I love you, Mary...” he pulled her close to him and held her tight.
...
For the second night in a row, Mary and Howie made love like she had never known. ‘Not even Josh is that good,’ she thought before falling asleep.
...
Howie groaned and rolled over. The clock read 3:24. He rubbed his eyes and tried to fall back to sleep when he heard Mary moving around next to him. She was tossing, turning, whimpering in some nightmare. “Mary?” he asked trying to wake her from her dream. “Mary?” he shook her. Finally, she opened her eyes, looked at him and
smiled. She rolled back over and fell back to sleep.
...
At 8:30, Howie walked downstairs, joining the five other guys in the kitchen. “Yo, D, what was goin on last night?” AJ asked, looking up form his coffee.
“Mary had a nightmare.”
“About what?”
“I don’t know, she was squirming like she was in pain, and I woke her up, she looked at me, smiled, and fell back to sleep,” he shrugged and pushed it aside.
“Hey, Howard, can I talk to you?” Josh asked, standing. Howie nodded and followed him onto the back porch. Josh took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one. He looked off into the woods, without looking at Howie. “Last night wasn’t just a nightmare.”
“What do ya mean?”
“She was squirming and whimpering, right? Like someone was hurting her?”
“Yeah...”
“It wasn’t just a nightmare, she was dreaming about Thom breaking into the house. But don’t ask her about the dream, she won’t remember it.”
“How do you know about it?”
“I was with her the night before it happened, and I protected her the night after.”
“Before what? After?” Howie asked, confused.
“All right,” Josh sighed, sitting, “she told you how we used to be together, right? Well, we were friends after we broke things off but we still lived together. One day, it was just the two of us at home and we had this pillow fight, and one thing led to another, and we slept together. That night, her brother and I went down to Pa & Ma’s, it was open mic night and we were gunna play. Mary stayed home because she had class the next day. I don’t know exactly what happened, but when we came home, the apartment was really dark. We walked in and heard the phone off the hook. I turned on the kitchen
light and saw the phone, dangling to the floor, with blood on the receiver. There was Mary, on the kitchen floor, hands covered in blood. Her shirt was ripped open and there was blood all over her stomach. Luckily she was passed out so I could clean her up. I was trained to be an EMT, that’s how we met, so I stitched her all up and everything. Ya know the scar on her stomach?” Howie nodded. “Well, that’s how that happened. I carried her into her bedroom and saw blood all over the bed, the floor. I took her into Chas’s room to sleep the night. She begged me not to leave her, so I didn’t. She said she was afraid, so I held her close to me all night. At one point, she broke down, crying, that Thom broke in. He raped her, slashed her, and left her for dead.” Josh paused, shaking his head. He took a drag of his cigarette. “And now she won’t talk about it. I think she pushed it out of her mind, but sometimes it just comes back to her.”
“But why did she just immediately calm down when she opened her eyes?”
“He gets inside her head. She had that nightmare that night. It took a while for her to fall asleep, but when she did, it was awful. I shook her awake, she opened her eyes and immediately relaxed,” he shrugged. “If she sees someone she loves, she knows she’s safe.”
Mary walked down the stairs and into the kitchen. “Morning, boys.”
“Hey Mary,” the chorused.
“Mary, what was that nightmare all about last night? I heard ya whimpering across the hall,” AJ asked.
“Nightmare? What nightmare?”
Mary sat in the kitchen, sipping a cup of tea and reading the paper. The phone rang. “Mary, it’s for you!” Brian called.
“Hello?”
“Hey, it’s me,” Josh said.
“Hey darlin, what’s up?”
“Nothing much, I just wanted to know if you wanted to get our band back together...”
...
Mary ran upstairs, searching for Howie. “I’m in here,” he called from the bathroom down the hall when he heard her in his bedroom.
“All right, I’ll be waiting in here,” she responded and sat on the bed. He returned and Mary motioned him to sit next to her. “Howard, I have something really important to ask you, something that means so much to me...” Howie nodded and she continued, taking his hand. “Josh called a few minutes ago... He said that he’s got this friend in a band, the Spitvalves, they’re from here in town, and they’re going on a tour type thing... And they wanted someone to tour with them, for company, ya know? And Josh wanted to know if I wanted to do it... Before I gave him an answer I wanted to talk to you...”
“Wow...” Howie shook his head to try to clear his thoughts. “What kind of tour?”
“Nothing much, just going around to some small clubs like Pa & Ma’s... At most, it’ll be two months. I haven’t played music, I mean, really played, in a long time... and I just have this feeling about it, like it might be something good...”
“You really want this, don’t you?” She simply nodded. “Let me think about it, all right?” She nodded again. “When are you leaving?”
“Three days...”
Howie sighed. “I don’t want to keep you from something you love, Mary.”
“But I can tell you don’t want me to go,” she sighed and looked away from him.
He took his hand and angled her face back up towards him. “And I want you to be happy. I know I’ll be jealous that he gets to spend so much time with you... alone... but if I didn’t let you go, I’d know I was holding you back, and that selfishness would hurt much more.”
“You can come with us if you want to, it’s just going to be me and Josh and our equipment in his van...”
“I just got home myself, I haven’t seen my family in so long...”
“I can’t say I know how that feels, you, the guys, and Josh are my family... and Sam, when he shows up...” She sighed deeply. “I could really use him right now...”
“Why’s that?”
“He’d help with the band, extra instruments...”
...
Three days passed quickly, filled with barbecues, long talks, hanging around, and general silliness. Howie helped Mary carry her guitar, violin, trumpet, microphones, and amps out to the waiting van.
“So, what’s the name of your group?” Howie asked, closing the door.
“We’re ‘Tainted Love,’” Josh smiled proudly.
“He thought of the name.”
“Hey, it was true at the time.”
“Yeah, whatever. We mainly did... erm... do covers.”
Soon another van pulled behind Josh’s. A man of average height but big boned stepped out. He was in his late twenties and his golden blonde hair was spiked on the top of his head. His chin was framed in a goatee like Howie’s and AJ’s, but had a stud through his chin. “Hey folks,” he smiled.
“Oh, Mary, this is Lance. He’s the guitarist for the Spitvalves. Lance, this is my better half, Mary.”
“Nice to meet you, Mary.”
“You too,” she smiled and they shook hands. “Hey, grab your band and I’ll take ya inside to meet everyone.” She turned to look at Howie. “This is my boyfriend, Howard.”
“Nice to meet you, Howard.”
“Please, call me Howie.” They shook hands and everyone went inside.
...
Mary and Howie shared a sweet, soft kiss before she climbed into the driver’s seat of the van. “If you kiss me like that, you’ll make me want to stay.” She sighed and held him close.
“I’ll miss you, Mary.”
“I’ll miss you too, but I’ll call whenever I can, I promise.”
He kissed her again. “I love you.”
“Love you too, Howard.” She climbed back into the van. After a few moments, the vans were started and disappeared down the road.
