Chapter
7:
The Talk…
I
walked out of the bathroom and was finally ready to face some challenges today.
I went to my drawer, opened it and pulled out my Grey sweat pants and a
black sports bra. I put them on and just as I was about to brush my hair, there
was a knock on my door. I walked
over, unlocked it, and opened it to reveal an already showered and ready Faith
who barged in without invitation. “What’s
up chica?” I asked as she went to sit in my blue chair.
She stared at me for a moment, then finally spoke.
“I
should be asking you that Laura,” she replied.
“What
do you mean?” I asked playing stupid. I
knew perfectly well what she meant.
“You,
what’s up with you? You’re all
weird around Jeff. You won’t even
touch him! He’s not poisonous for
Christ’s sake. If he was then
I’d be dead by now. I know what
happened with your father was a horrible experience, but it’s over!
It’s in the past. Now,
Jeff thinks he’s done something to you, and has he?
No!” She let out a
frustrated sigh and then continued, “I don’t mean to yell at you like this,
but God damn it, why are you being like this?” She finished her little speech,
demanding me to answer her. She
looked pissed and ready to kill. She
was now standing.
“Oh,
and another thing. Jeff said you
had gotten a phone call earlier and started freaking out, and talking to
yourself. I want an explanation to
everything and anything, now,” she said waiting impatiently for my answer.
I felt so horrible all of a sudden.
What did I do to deserve this? I
went over to my bed, picked up my large scooby-doo stuffed animal, and held it
for dear life. I let out a loud frustrated sigh. “Come over here and sit down chica,” I said softly
patting the area next to me on the bed. She
obliged, sitting down, staring at me and waited for me to reply with my answers.
Suddenly, I got a huge knot in my stomach and a lump in my throat.
Tears started to form and when I opened my mouth to speak, nothing came
out. I held my Scooby closer and
the tears started to flow. I
brought my legs up from the side of the bed and sat Indian style in front of
Faith.
“Oh
my God, Laura, why are you crying? I’ve
never seen you cry and we’ve been friends for over a decade!”
She exclaimed turning from pissed to concerned.
She moved closer to me and gave me a nice warm, comforting hug.
I pulled away after a minute and the tears had subsided a little.
“I’m
sorry. I’m so sorry chica; “ I
sobbed. “I never meant to make
Jeff feel like that. He didn’t do
anything. I hate pissing you off
and or upsetting you,” I continued. “Jeff’s
a great guy and I can now understand why you allowed him in. But I have issues that you don’t know about and I’m
sorry. I wish I had told you about
them a long time ago. The reason I
didn’t was because I was threatened. I’m
so scared right now; it’s not funny. I
don’t know what to do. I hate to
say it but, I wish I weren’t alive at this moment.”
I paused lifting up my hand, which had stopped Faith from commenting.
“Lemme finish, you wanted answers, I’m giving them to you.
I don’t mean to be a bitch, but you don’t have a Goddamn clue what
I’m fucking going through. If I
were smart, I would have told you about my problems 5 years ago, but no, I
didn’t. I, I, I…” I started
stuttering at the last sentence. I
had stopped crying, let go of Scooby, and just gazed at Faith.
Concern. That’s what was
written on her face right then and there. I
started arguing with myself. Should
I tell her? No.
But then she’ll think she did something wrong and go crazy trying to
figure out what. She doesn’t
deserve to be bombarded with all my problems.
But it was only one…A huge one though.
Maybe I’ll feel better if I tell her.
Could I trust her? Wait!
What the heck? She’s practically family!
Of course I could trust her. I’m
going insane! Quit arguing with
yourself and spit it out. Will she
believe me though? I’ll never
know unless I…
“I
was raped,” I blurted out, putting my head in my hands and mentally smacking
myself for dumping the news on her life that.
I looked up to see Faith with disbelief written all over her face.
Crap.
“What?”
She asked in total shock. I
really wasn’t in the mood to repeat myself, but she deserved an explanation.
“I
was raped,” I said a little louder, slower and clearer. She looked stunned.
“Who?
When? How?” she asked all at once. “One
question at a time. I want to make
this clear so I don’t have to repeat myself or have another discussion like
this again.” I said waiting for
her first question.
“Okay,
first and most important, why didn’t you tell me?” She asked a little hurt.
“Because,
as I said before, he threatened me chica. I
was and still am scared shitless. I
don’t know what to do.” I
answered truthfully.
“Well,
when did this happen?” She asked
awaiting my reply. “Well,
remember my 17th birthday party?” I asked her.
“Yeah,
but you never left my side except when…” She paused, mouth wide open.
“When you went with Adam to get your present.”
She finished in a whisper. “Don’t
tell me Adam did this!” Faith
exclaimed.
“Sorry
to bust your bubble, but he did,” I stated.
“But
I thought he was gay!” She
continued ranting. “Apparently
not,” I said in a smooth tone. “Why
hadn’t you noticed I wasn’t back at the party, but Adam was?”
I asked.
“Well,
he said you didn’t feel too hot and went home.
Then he went on saying that you had told him to tell us to continue
partying,” she said then putting her index finger to her chin and started
thinking. There was a light knock
at my door. I got up and opened it
slowly.
“What’s
up Jeff?” I asked hoping my voice didn’t crack.
Faith cleared her throat and I looked back. She nodded her head towards Jeff as if trying to tell me
something. “Ha, oh yeah,” I
said a little uneasy. “Sorry
about earlier Jeff. You didn’t do
anything to me, so don’t think otherwise.
I never meant to make you feel as if you did something, but I have
issues.” I finished.
It’s
all good. I was a little upset
because I’d thought I had done something to you,” was his reply.
“Well,
now you know,” I said. Faith got
up and walked towards Jeff and I. She
lightly patted my shoulder, walked passed me and went straight into Jeff’s
awaiting arms. They embraced with a
heart-stopping kiss. “Damn Faith,
it’s like you haven’t seen him in months,” I joked.
They parted and she said, “Ha, ha, Laura.”
“Oh,
was their something you needed Jeff?” I
asked, wondering why he came in.
“I
wanted to ask you if I could use your phone,” he said, and then continued,
“And this,” he finished while grabbing Faith’s hands and bringing her
towards him once again. The two had
yet another flaming embrace. “You
didn’t have to ask, but sure, you can use the phone,” I answered.
He didn’t pull away from Faith, but still managed to get one word out.
“Thanks.”
“Jeff,
go use the phone, I’ll be out in a few minutes, then we can have our own
little talk,” Faith said, trying to sneak in a wink with the evil smirk she
was wearing.
“I
can’t wait. We have a lot to
discuss,” he replied back to her. This
was too funny, yet sickening sweet. “Okay,
quit it you two. Faith do you
mind?” I asked while motioning
towards my room. “Oh yeah,” she
said giving Jeff a quick kiss and said something in his ear that made him beam.
She then slammed the door in his face, rushed to my bed and jumped on it.
“Whoa,
someone’s happy,” I commented. “Oh
hell yeah I am! I’ve never been
this excited about a guy I just met since High school.
And he’s so funny. He
knows what to say at the right times. I
only met him last night, but Birdi, I feel like I’ve known him for years
now,” she finished beaming and staring at nothing.
Wow, I thought. Someday,
Laura, someday…Yeah, someday you’ll stop talking to yourself.
“Faith,”
I said, waving my hand in front of her eyes.
She blinked and replied, “Yeah?”
“Is
there anything else you wanna know or can we end this displeasing
conversation?” I asked.
“Only
one or two more questions. Is this
why you haven’t had a boyfriend in like 5 years now?” She asked.
“That
is definitely why I hadn’t had a boyfriend and also why I pushed everyone,
except you, away,” I answered.
“Well,
you answered both my questions, so I guess that’s it,” she said getting up
off the bed and pulling me up with her. “Listen
chica, if you have any questions just ask.
I won’t bite your head off. I
just don’t want anyone knowing. We’ve
been friends for years and look how long it took me to tell you,” I said
giving her a half smile.
“It’s
okay Birdi,” she replied while coming closer and draping her hands around me
in a sister-like hug. I embraced
her back. We let go then walked out
of my room to go find her precious Jeffy…
back to Chapter 6
