July 17, 1999 - July 30, 1999
July 17, 1999 - July 30, 1999
July 17, 1999: scared shitless
so i guess i can go about..what happened the rest of
last night..as quoted from an email i sent someone
because at this owa (4am) i'm too lazy and tired to
reword everything:
~*~ BEGIN ~*~
so yeah!
lar came home at like 5.30, i had fallen asleep for about..an owa...and
when i sleep i get EASILY annoyed..and so i was annoyed and i annoyed him
so he left the room. *L* but when he came back we got ready to go to 'the
bite!'
and it started RAINING while we were waiting for the bus and we just SAW
the express bus go by as we were walking to the stop..d'awww!! so lar said
we would drive der. get there and park..and rode the monorail to the space
needle..and it was raining...lightly..but then started POURING later.
and so we were looking for stuff to eat! i mean, they SAID there would be
$2 'tastes'..but the tastes was like..lil' retardo (why am i saying this
word?) sampler things..NOT worth TWO DOLLA.
so foist..lar wants some sushi...EWWW...i had a small bite of the salmon?
YOU MEAN I JUST ATE THAT RAW?!?!? *L* i mean, i KNEW but still...gross.
not worth the $3.50 he paid.
so then we decided to get some mudd pie at the black angus booth..it was
$3...but WORTH IT..it was all rich and gooey and tasted a lil' like
coffee...
anyways, we had to get ME some food now cuz i was still VERY HUNGRY..and
we're wandering around..but we stall at this booth cuz...supposedly
everything there WAS $2..tho they had various prices..but they marked
things down cuz it was near closing time = 9pm!
so after MUCH debate..i went back der..and got a greek salad..WOW..it was
big and SO GOOD. lar got a philly chicken sammich...and we ate...and then
he went to get some mango ice cream (in the mango shell too!) at the booth
where i got the greek salad...and he ate THAT too. so then i finished my
salad and got an elephant ear which was VERY GOOD and pretty big too!
walka..and we passed a boof with SALMON..so he got a stick of salmon
jerky..*L* he ate so much. and then we were delayed cuz we had to watch
this guy do a demonstration of a shammie? it's like...a REALLY absorbant
towel thing...and i was impressed by it but...okay he goes....the next 4
people up here will get a FREE SHAMMIE!!!
and i'm like....GIMME!! but then he talka MO...
and you had to buy ONE set to get ONE free...which was $22..you got two big
shammie's *LOL@name* and one small one....and directions..OOOOOOOOH,
directions! *L*
so whatever, we were thirsty and wanted sobe..but they weren't selling
anymore..but we could have LOTS of samples. *L*
and now..we're like DRENCHED time to go back to the monorail.
and we picked up free pantene samples in a lil' satin drawstring bag..*L*
and...let's see..the movie! there was a big line, longer than
'star vars'...but we got okay seats....
lots of previews..i'm SICK of 'the haunting!!!' but they had a
preview...an indie film...about a girl..who i guess..falls in love with
siamese twin brothers..and i dunno...the preview was just hilarious...cuz
i mean..it could look like two gay men in bed together with the girl talka
him....and it was foonay watching her dance with bof? *L*
so then, the movie just..started..abruptly..which was coo. and it started
out goo..and the thing with it is...the 3 actors are the ones filming
it..so at most..you see 2 on camera, unless the camera is set down...and
that also means..that it's a very SHAKEY movie..i got a headache from it
and had to close my eyes a few times..
and..hmmm..i didn't think it was SO scary..like i didn't really JUMP! or
anything..it was just pretty..'fucked up' as larry put it....and well, now
my hyper drive active imagination is just making me REALLY paranoid...
i didn't think it was all too great..but if i'm scared like how i am now?
*heh*
well, the ending was pretty abrupt as well....and the audience
clapped..and we left. lar n i were pretty hungry....cuz i just had a big
salad..and well HE..he ate a lot of things. *L* and also the actors were
talking about how hungry they were. *L*
so we went to IHOP..something i SWORE i would never DO. but it was coo
this time..we got free drinks for some reason and the gir was nice..and
the food..was just right..not too heavy and not too much..i'm satisfied.
:)
and i admit..walking home i was pretty creeped out..bushes and trees....
~*~ END ~*~
i guess that's enough copying and pasting email stuffs. and yup. i'm
paranoid! and it's weird cuz while i was AT the movie...i wasn't
scared, but now that i'm out and stuffs...i'm left alone with
my thoughts which ALWAYS get the better of me...hyper drive...
getting paranoid. ack!!!
i just want it to be morning!!!!
so yeah..*chuckle* i'm such a scaredy cat. anyone who sees this
movie..discuss with me!! i'm still going over a particular
scene which still confuses me..but that's prolly why i'm so
messed up in the head now. *haw*
but..i mean, our friday night was pretty good. good various
foods to eat...a 'fucked up' movie...my paranoia...and i
get to go home at 9am today!! who needs sleep? don't think
i'll be getting it..think i'll go read some online journals..
i feel bad for having the lights on..with larry sleeping
behind me..but i can't..have..dark. no, not now...i think i
may lock the door...close the window. cuz, with the window
slightly open..it causes the door to..make sounds cuz it's not
secure in its location, if you know what i mean?
ummmmmmmmm.. rattling, that's the word.
i guess that's enough for this update. in case you didn't
check it out..read my latest entry..it was posted on the
16th
, k?
oh yes, one more thing...the abuse of power..of knowledge,
experience..whatever...it's such a sickening thing. i
may go into more detail with this when i come back from the
weekend, but we'll see.
okay..scared!! er...bye!!!!!!! :) (PS: disregard any typos...
it's late..i'm scared...my keyboard sticks...go home! ;P)
July 21, 1999: Larry's critique on my 1H4 paper
I'm just putting this up cuz..I was surprised that he LIKED my paper and had
few corrections to it. And it was weird cuz I wrote it in only 4hrs and I
didn't really go about doing it any differently than I have for other papers.
I guess it all has to do with "location location location." *heh* Enjoy!
The Father In Falstaff
William Shakespeare's "Henry IV, Part I" is the home [OUR INTRODUCTION TO
HIS GREATEST COMIC FIGURE...IT WORKS CAUSE WE SEE FALSTAFF AGAIN IN PART II,
AND IN THE MERRY WIVES OF WINDSOR] of
his greatest comic figure, Falstaff. Falstaff [IS AN AGING HEDONIST,
SPENDING HIS TIME AMONG WOMEN, DRINK, AND HAL] spends his
time among women, drink, and mischievous activities with
Prince Hal. In a time where reason and self-control are[WERE]
recognized and prized over emotion and excess, he is
unreformed and crass. [THIS PART'S GOOD...YOU CAUGHT ME BY SURPRISE THERE
*WINK*] Although much of the time spent
with Prince Hal is in jest and taken none too seriously,
it can be contrived that Falstaff is a surrogate father
to the future king. As such, the relationship the men
share is mutually beneficial, though the overall individual
intent may differ. Falstaff is memorable as the comedian
and as[AS THE COMIC FIGURE, AN OLD MAN GRASPING...] an old man grasping onto
youth, and having it
inevitably [ULTIMATELY IS A BETTER WORD HERE THAN INEVITABLY] slip through
his fingers.
The dynamics of Falstaff and Prince Hal's relationship are
comprised primarily on the carousing and escapades which they
plot at the Boar's Head Tavern, their popular [FAVORITE..POPULAR IMPLIES
SOMETHING DIFFERENT] haunt. In
their first scene together, the men are planning a robbery
at Gads Hill. Many of their exchanges are insults, with Prince
Hal mocking Falstaff's leisurely lifestyle: "Thou art so
fat-witted with drinking of old sack, and unbuttoning thee
after supper, and sleeping upon benches after noon, that thou
hast forgotten to demand that truly which thou wouldst truly
know, (I, ii, ll 2-5), Falstaff quickly replies, "And I
prithee, sweet wag, when thou art a king, as God save thy
grace--'majesty' I should say, for grace thou wilt have
none--' (I, ii, ll 13-15)." Their friendly banter makes for
the belief that both men do care about the other.
Both men need the other to fulfill something lacking in their
lives.[YOU CAN SAY THEY ARE SYMBIANTS, IF YOU WANT A FIFTY CENT WORD]
Falstaff retains his youth when he is with Prince
Hal, and the Prince uses Falstaff to live with reckless
abandon. Whether [KILL 'WHETHERE] with or without his knowledge, Falstaff
is his surrogate father and does teach him a thing or two.
At one point, Falstaff play acts as King Henry reprimanding
his son for the company he keeps--something which occurs later!
Prince Hal practices with Falstaff in becoming well spoken in
royal speech, which will prove useful in his transition to the
throne. Falstaff's attachment to the boy grows out of the need
for companionship and his desire to retain a place in the court
because his breed of drunken and lascivious obnoxiousness is
being replaced by the authoritarian and refined kind. [THAT RHYMES!]
However, Prince Hal later confides to the reader that his
friendship with Falstaff only exists to make him seem more
virtuous after giving up these idle pleasures for his seat on
the throne when the time arrives. "So when this loose behaviour
I throw off And pay the debt I never promisd, By how much
better than my word I am, By so much shall I falsify men's
hopes, (I, iii, ll 186-189)." This comes as a shock to know
the prince is using and planning to toss [DISCARD] the defenseless
Falstaff after his placement on the throne. Here, the reader
pities the poor man for not having better companions. The
reason why Falstaff easily captures the readers attention and
hearts is because he acts naturally, compared to the stiff
collars of the court; he is not afraid to indulge and make a
spectacle of himself. When Prince Hal's true intentions
comes [COME IS THE WORD YOU WANNA USE...] to light, the reader is prepared
for when Falstaff is
severed from the court's graces,[VERY good POINT BUT IT MIGHT GO OVER
SMOOTHER IF YOU SAY 'THE REVELATION OF HAL'S TRUE INTENTIONS BRACES THE
READER FOR FALSTAFF'S EVENTUAL SEVERANCE FROM THE COURT'S GOOD GRACES]
because without the Prince
Falstaff is and has nothing.
With an inevitable unpleasant ending up the bend, the reader
looks harshly upon Prince Hal for betraying the kindness and
affections of a tubby old man. From the Princes cunning
admittance [CONFESSION] comes the foreshadowing of a Machiavellian rule.
[ACTUALLY, BETTER IS 'THE PRINCE'S COLD CONFESSION FORESHADOWS A
MACHIAVELLIAN RULE...AND THE COMPARISON TO MACHIAVELLI IS *QUITE*
APROPOS...BUT YOU MIGHT WANNA GO FURTHER AND SAY WHY BECAUSE ALOT OF PEOPLE
USE MACHIAVELLIAN AS A GENERIC ADJECTIVE FOR A CRUEL RULER. YOU ACTUALLY
UNDERSTAND IT TO BE SOMEONE WILLING AND ABLE TO CRUELLY USE PEOPLE AS MEANS
TO AN END....BE SURE TO SHOW THAT YOU KNOW IT....GOOD JOB BEBE]
It has been questioned whether Falstaff deserves his fate of
banishment because he was corrupting the Prince. But because
of his beguiling and genuine demeanor, Falstaff obviously wanted
a younger comrade to have some fun with and make him feel
youthful. During their time together he also took on the
role of the father and thus has a big part in molding the
Prince, no matter what the end brings. The friendly banter
coming from Prince Hal was merely a rouse [RUSE] to keep this man
at bay until the time of betrayal. The premise is a very
sad one because a father-like man will be wronged and
abandoned by a boy he believed cared about him.
In closing, one of the last impressions the reader is left
with is the question of why Falstaff cared so much to be a
surrogate father to this boy. The only answer that is clear
derives from what kind of person he is. Though he was no
stranger to the harsh realities of the world, Falstaff was
naive in overestimating his trust in a friend and
underestimating his self-worth--which lead to his eventual
downfall and the end of the Old England Merrymakers.
Despite all, we knew he had a blast until the end.
WHY CANT YOU ALWAYS WRITE LIKE THIS??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IM ACTUALLY PRETTY FRUSTRATED WITH YOU NOW.
SERIOUS. YOU SHOULD ALWAYS DO THIS. I DIDNT EVEN REALLY HAVE TO EDIT THIS
PAPER MUCH, BUT YOU DO WANT TO GO THRU IT AND LOOK FOR LITTLE THINGS, LIKE
POSESSIVES AND STUFF. OTHERWISE, TERRIFIC JOB.
*heh* So, don't hate me cuz I can write. :P Well, I must explain about some
of the awful wording I had there...It's just that..I wanted the words DOWN
before I returned to Seattle. And once I got to Seattle, I didn't want to
continue working on the paper, I just wanted to sleep..so Ha! What's real
cool about Larry's changes to my paper were....that they were EXactly what I
was trying to put into words but couldn't. weeeeeeee!
July 23, 1999: what a life.
so, WEDNESDAY was my first day of school for the WEEK. *haw* and
shakespeare..was awfully boring...they were discussing henry 4, part
2...which i still haven't finished..but i don't really "need" to finish
it..cuz he said something about there NOT being a 2nd henry paper....so
that's coo..and the next play we're reading..i've already studied it..and
in fact, it's one of my favorite plays. :))))
but that left an hour before my next class..so i went to the puter lab to
update my page and then went to class.
and i've KNOWN for many many weeks..that my exam would be on the 21st..but
i just didn't KNOW that yesterday WAS the 21st.....
this has GOT to be the stupidest thing i've done.
so i'm walking to class..i see 3 girls outside studying..and i think:
hmm! they have a test today! and i enter the building and it HITS
ME..today was the 21st!!!! i go pale..weak in the knees...i feel
sick......ack......i go through my bag..and saw what i had always
known..exam on july 21.....i KNOW that..but today..was THE day.
so you know what i did?
i went HOME.
i LEFT.
i can't BELIEVE this.
i didn't know..what else to DO. i mean, i didn't even have my BOOKS with
me...i think it was an open test...i could have at least faked someTHING
if i had my books..but i didn't even have THOSE.
so i don't even know why i went home. i mean..go home, get books, go back
there 5-10mins late? i didn't know what to do!!
8/3/99: The remainder of this day's update
has been revised, if you didn't read it the first time it came out,
then I guess you missed out. :P
i waited for larry to come home and we discussed my options.
i can just NOT take the test..which is the DUMBEST thing.
i can drop the class..but then comes a big mess with financial
aid/loans..way too much trouble for this...
and what i was thinking was..that i would say i was sick. that's as far as
I was gonna go with it. but lar said that i'd need a note for that to
fly...so you guessed it.
i went to acute care (for immediate attention)...and i said i had stomach
pains..which i did..but they were because i felt sick from...this exam and
my leaving. UG. so i lied about my pains and the doctor gavea me some
maloxx and tylenol..and got me a note....and then.....
he sent me upstairs for BLOOD WORK.
i mean, i didn't 'have' to do it....but i don't know why i did..but i
went..and they took out THREE VIALS OF BLOOD from me. so now i'm like...my
goodness i've learned my lesson!!
but then!
the woman gives me a kit to..okay this is gross...collect a stool sample.
here is where i DREW THE LINE.
but....that's what happened to me yesterday.
i can't begin to say how horrible i feel about it. but i know i learned my
lesson. how can it just sneak up on me like that? how can i not KNOW what
the day was?
*ayeeeeeeeeeee*
today i wasn't well prepared to take the exam but i did anyways.
just to get it out of the way. and so now i just have FUN to
look forward to this weekend. *heh* i did leave 3 questions
blank tho..(out of 28) cuz i really had NO clue..it wasn't in
the text, not that i could see..cuz there are a LOT of words in
there. *haw* and even my notes!! (which i wasn't supposed to
use..but..EH.) and i guess it was talked about on one of the
days that i was absent or not taking notes. so that sucks...he
said i'd get it back on monday. *EEEEEEEEEK*
tonight lar n i are going to the spaghetti factory. YAY!! i'm
excited..and i'm gonna do something with weesa tomorra..well,
i hope..i just threw the idea out to him over email..so we'll see!!
lar n i also rented "she's all that" and "lethal weapon 4" on
monday..and i like "she's all that"..it's a cute movie..i
don't really like "lethal" movies though....jet li was coo!!
but i guess that's all..i wanna thank
Catherine for her comments on
my henry paper!! yoU ROCK! :) and oh, check dis out:
Kick Baby!
!! *heh*
July 29, 1999: So sorry, so lazy
kay well, it's thursday, my day off..i should be updating, which i am,
but it's gonna be a short entry cuz for some ODD reason i don't feel
like sitting online..or even watching our FREE digital tv! shocked,
aren't you. :P anyways, i just wanted to stick these two links up
here, read the first one..it's another one of those weird email
exchanges..and watch the second one..it takes a while to load, but i
find it very amusing. WOOP! :)
Another Weirdo &
Kick da Baby!
July 30, 1999: there is something i need to do today...
but of horse i can't think of it!! ack! i hope it wasn't
something important. :P well, i'm still pretty lazy, but it's..
*checks the clock* nearing 10.30am here..i have class at noon,
and will be hanging out for a while cuz i gotta talk to peoples
(whoa..what? she made some FRIENDS?! *L*) about our murder profiling
ass_ignment. btw..i don't think they're my "friends" yet..haaa.
anyways, i'm looking forward to tomorrow. it's gonna be happy fun day!
jen is coming. *weeee* but i'm talka her tonight and she MAY even
come up tonight, after she gets off verka..and you all know that i'll
be up at night..so i can let her in and we can talka stuffs. :) and
we already have a game plan! we're gonna..hang out and then...go to
fremont for shop-PING! and then go to the cinerama (this supa
coo theatre) to watch "star varz"...it'll be larry and my 3rd time
seeing it..but if it's fo jen, then so be
it. :)
too bad weese is busy this weekend with another cousin's wedding.
geez, how many cousins do you have wilson! *L*
hmmm..i've gotten tired with the colors on this page..i think that, over
the weekend, i'll make a new page. i already found the background for
it..it's nice and pretty, and i think it'll cheer me up. :)
as for other news, i've just been really bored lately. being online
doesn't seem to have the urgency that it used to. and digital tv
doesn't hold my attention like it used to..though there are 150
channels to choose from! i dunno what's up. i think that i feel okay
inside, but i dunno. i guess things are just changing and they're not
the way i want it. but that's usually how things go, hmm?
i was listening to the radio this morning.
this station is hosting a huuuuuuge concert with lots of different
bands called "end fest" in one week-one day. and they had a contest, for
the best seats in the house..the winner and 10 friends get to sit on
2 IKEA couches set up high above the crowd for the show. anyways, they
had the girl..and were calling her friends..and if all 10 friends said
that they were friends with this girl and agreed to go..then she'd win.
now that got me to thinking, do *I* have 10 friends? 10 friends, whose
numbers i could give to the radio station, who would agree that we were
friends and who would definitely want to go to "end fest?" and it's
depressing to think, but i don't think i have 10 friends. larry always
said something about having a handful of really good friends....that
i have....so it's of some consolation.
i guess what i'm depressed about is that i don't have tickets to
"end fest" (sold out) and that if i DID have the opportunity to
win that contest that i wouldn't win it. :P
the manager has been hunting us down for the past week. it's
not my fault that the outside phone (which is the machine also)
doesn't RING OR beep when there's a message. ha! i just don't like
how he's bugging us so badly. "are you staying with the
apartment? you need to sign a new lease..just let me know..XXX-XXXX,
we can do this on saturday, blah blah blah." and it's DARRYL..
and he leaves like these 5-minute messages..just constantly
repeating himself. ACK!
lar and i did look around at apartments last sunday. it was
quite uneventful..though we did see one that we fell in love with.
right now they don't have any openings though. *pouty* i'd like
to find a place by mid-month...i have all this time that i can do
much of the moving on my own. plus, it'll help when we clean out
this current apartment..i admit that (the cleaning) is giving me
much anxiety. okay i know i'm weird.
and i've also decided that i WILL get a job. before, it was always,
i THINK i will possibly consider maybe getting a job sometime later.
(:P) but my current monetary status sucks big time and with a
new place around the bend with their first/last month's..and their
deposits..it's gonna be a big chunk of change.
anyhow, i think i've rambled on enough. it's about 10.40am here...
but we all know my puter clock runs fast. :P talk to you all later,
probably tonight and maybe saturday night. though, i have a lot
of work due the following week! ack.
claireluv@hotmail.com
