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Sex In Star Wars

by my dirty-minded sister Kim
You'll never look at Star Wars the same again if you read this, proceed with caution.

From A New Hope: C-3PO to R2-D2: "I'm not getting in there..." Honestly, who can resist cute little Artoo?

C-3PO to R2-D2 "That's funny, the damage doesn't look as bad from out here." It sure FELT like there was some damage

C-3PO to R2-D2: "no more adventures, I'm not going that way." Apparently, Artoo had finally been asking for too much, maybe he wanted to try it up the motivator....

C-3PO about R2-D2: "excuse me sir, but that R2 unit is in prime condition, a real bargain....I've worked with him before" I know i've used a few too many of Threepio and Artoo, but couldn't you just see them together? Plus, he's in prime condition and is a bargain. Sounds like a hooker to me! Not only that, but Threepio has "worked with him before" ....huh....

C-3PO to Luke: "actually, there's not much to tell. I'm not much more than an interpreter, and not very good at telling stories. Well, not at making them interesting anyways" Now threepio, no one can screw up porn.

Luke to R2-D2: "well my little friend, you've got something jammed in here real good." What has threepio been sticking in you?!

Owen to Luke: "You must understand I need you here, Luke." Damn my perverted mind!

Owen about Luke: "I'll make it up to him next year, I promise." Nail Luke a couple times and he forgives you for anything.

Luke to Owen: "All right, I'll be there in a few minutes. (to Threepio) Boy am I gonna get it." He sounds more excited there than anything else, and he should be, he's "gonna get it."

Luke about R2-D2: "I think he's searching for his former master, but I've never seen such devotion in a droid before." I'm told I'm the only one that gets this one. Artoo is DEVOTED to his MASTER. Grrr, nevermind.

Obi-Wan to Luke: "I have something here for you. Your father wanted you to have this when you were old enough, but your uncle wouldn't allow it." My perverted mind goes wild at the things that I can come up with for this one. What would Luke's father want him to have when he was old enough? My first thought is porn, that's how messed up I am.

Obi-Wan to Luke: "It surrounds us and penetrates us." LOL, I love this quote. Plus, to make it perfect, he's talking about something called the Force! AHAHAHAHAHA!

Obi-Wan to Luke: "I seem to have found it." You'd think when you got to be Obi-Wan's age, you would've found it already. He was so hot when he was younger, he should have been surrounded by girls.

Obi-Wan to Luke: "I need your help Luke. She needs your help. I'm getting too old for this sort of thing." That's where viagra comes in.

Questions? Comments? Complaints?

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