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!!The Amazing Adventures of RdDragon and Scum!!
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From: Adventurer
| Posted: 1/19/2005 11:37:42 AM | Message Detail
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Over a year ago I was writing an on-going story based around the Secret Boards. Credit goes to Infinite Rebirth for the inspiration due to his story on the same subject matter. Due to the fact that I didn't pay much attention to this board I accidentally let the topic purge. However, I had my progress saved in a word file.
I've had the urge to continue the story for some reason or other. So I intend to do so now. The original topic had an introduction with the cast and some other info. Unfortunately, I only saved the story itself and that topic was completely lost. Therefore, I'll just throw in people as I see fit. Being as I've been mostly out of the hunting game for awhile I'm not up to snuff on current Secret Board Hunters. The story will be consist of posters that I know and like from my experiences with SBHing. However, if you wish to be in the story, just post here and I'm sure I can work you in.
Useless Info: The original topic was titled: "Meanwhile, Over There..." and was posted by my Zealous Slacker account. The opening line was originally "Sometime in the far far far off future of the year 2005... " but due to the fact that is now 2005, I'm changing that.
For anyone who doesn't realize, I am NinjaMaster. And now on with the story...enjoy...if anyone actually bothers to read it.
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Adventure: the pursuit of life. |
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From: Adventurer
| Posted: 1/19/2005 11:38:48 AM | Message Detail
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Sometime in the far far far off future of the year 2005...
Things in the world have changed drastically. The atmosphere has become toxic and people everywhere walk around covering their mouths with their shirts. Our new alien overlords have increased sales taxes to 8.5%. The killer robots created by Bill Gates have somehow found a way to reproduce even though all the robots are female. But none of that is relevant to our story...
Fade into a crummy one room apartment where an ageless man, probably in his twenties, is sitting in front of his computer. The man's true identity is unknown to everyone. His username on GameFAQs is Scum. Scum was banned back in the before time, but when GameFAQs made the conversion to virtual reality he was reinstated to level 49: Secret Board Hunter. Along with virtual reality came lots of pluses but also some negatives. Secret boards became a mass breeding ground for troublemakers. Moderators were all too busy dealing with reported problems from users and didn't have the time or patience to deal with the vast world of secret boards. That's when CJayC initiated the Secret Board Hunters to deal with the problem. The Secret Board Hunters ignore the queue and physically search for violators throughout the secret boards.
Scum gazes out his single window and notices what appears to be another one of those worldwide lighting storms brewing. As if it hadn't already been a lousy day. He bites down into his last apple and logs onto VR GameFAQs to do some hunting. As always, Scum drops by the Crypt before doing anything else. The Crypt being the unofficial home board of the Secret Board Hunters. As he approaches the Crypt he spots SBP standing around looking annoyed. SBP had been appointed level 49 before any of the other Secret Board Hunters. Although he doesn't actually have any more authority than the other hunters they all considered him as the first and foremost of the group.
SBP calls out, "Hey, get over here. I've got some work for you to do." Scum mopes along at his typical speed and gets there a few minutes later. SBP starts jawing some more. "What took you so long? As you know, the boards have been growing more and more chaos filled. From now on we hunt in pairs." Scum asks, "So, it's me and you then?" "No. I've got some other matters to attend to. I already sent RdDragon out to the Commodore 64 alone. He hasn't been gone long. Probably still in the A's. You catch up with him." "If by Commodore 64 you mean apples, I'm on it." SBP just gives him an agitated look and walks off.
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Adventure: the pursuit of life. |
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From: Adventurer
| Posted: 1/19/2005 11:39:07 AM | Message Detail
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After arming himself with a freeze gun(used to suspend offending users) Scum sets off for the Commodore 64. Along the way he spots some minor TOS violations but is in too much of a hurry to delete them. Covering ground in virtual reality is more time consuming than the old days of browsing. At least Scum is in a better mood. It's been days since he has had a chance to annoy RdDragon and he can already taste the fun like a sweet, red, juicy apple...Scum mops up the drool and starts double timing it.
Up in the distance, Scum sees a red blur that can only be the color scheme RdDragon assumes for his user appearance. As Scum draws closer he notices that RdDragon is with someone else and he appears to be writing on a yellow piece of paper. Must be a warning or notification. The other guy walks off and the angry look on his face leads Scum to believe that it was probably a warning. RdDragon turns towards Scum with shifty eyes. Scum returns the look with a smiley face. The two of them then take off without exchanging a word.
They silently trudge along for about an hour without seeing anything. All of a sudden RdDragon yells out, "What is that!?" Scum peers ahead and sees some flashing lights. "Looks like someone is shooting at something. I'm sure they can handle it without us. We have a beat to walk and it ain't going to walk itself." RdDragon doesn't look amused so Scum says, "alright, let's check it out." Both of them unholster their weapons and hurry ahead. When they get closer they see two Secret Board Hunters firing into the shadows. RdDragon hollers to them, "What are you shooting"? The sound startles the board hunters and they abruptly halt. When they turn around Scum recognizes them as his old pals, Interceptor and NinjaMaster. NinjaMaster reluctantly makes the first move to answer the question. "I don't know. It was some sort of giant monster. How the hell did a monster get into GameFAQs?" RdDragon replies, "It was just visually represented as a monster in VR. It was probably a virus or some alien program." NinjaMaster whines back, "How come it can't be a monster but it can be an alien?" RdDragon gives him a disgusted look. "That's not what I meant by alien..." Interceptor chimes in, "Whatever it was, I think we should follow it." They all agree and the four Secret Board Hunters head off into the shadows.
to be continued...
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Adventure: the pursuit of life. |
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From: Adventurer
| Posted: 1/19/2005 11:40:46 AM | Message Detail
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Well, that's as far as I got originally. Everything from now on will be new updates. Oh yeah, and I'm dumb, I forgot to change the year from 2005.
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Adventure: the pursuit of life. |
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From: Adventurer
| Posted: 1/19/2005 1:53:21 PM | Message Detail
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As the four of them travel along Scum manages to lag behind in the rear, so if anything happens, it will happen to everyone else first. RdDragon looks back and asks, "Scum, what are you ding way back there?" Scum responds, "I'm the rearguard. It's an important job. Rears need guarding, you see. Who ever heard of a frontguard?" RdDragon mumbles something but Scum doesn't catch it. Scum figures RdDragon was probably just praising him on his dedication to the team effort. Several seconds later NinjaMaster whines, "Are we there yet?" Interceptor says, "We don't even know where there is. We are just wandering around blindly..." NinjaMaster then asks, "Well, whose idea was it to follow that monster anyway? Not mine! That's who." Intereceptor disagrees, "I said to follow it and we all agreed. Even you, Ninja. If you scroll back up the conversation you will see..." The two of them continue bickering but Scum is too busy humming the theme to Bonanza in his head to hear what they are saying.
"Bonanza!" Everyone turns around and looks in Scum's direction. Scum also turns around to see what they are looking at. "What? I don't see anything guys", says Scum. RdDragon sighs. "Let's hurry. This is becoming tiresome." Just then, Interceptor proclaims, "There it is up ahead. I see something. That has to be it." RdDragon whispers, "Everyone be quiet. We don't want to alert it to our presence." And then a voice rings out loudly, "Bonanza!" It is of course Scum, singing yet again. RdDragon is annoyed now and gets ready to chastise Scum when NinjaMaster and Interceptor join in with the singing.
We're not a one to saddle up and run ... Bonanza!
Anyone of us who starts a little fuss, knows he can count on me!
One for four
Four for one,
This we guarantee.
We got a right to pick a little fight ... Bonanza!
If anyone fights anyone of us, he's gotta fight with me!
RdDragon yells, "Shut up, are you guys stupid or what? That thing would have to be deaf to not have heard us..." And sure enough, the object turns towards them. It remains motionless, however. NinjaMaster screams, "Oh my God! It's coming right for us!" RdDragon replies, "What are you talking about...it hasn't moved an inch..." Scum then yells out, "RdDragon is right! It is coming our way. Let's shoot it!" And with that, Scum, Ninja, and Interceptor start blasting wildly. A good ten minutes after the object has collapsed to the ground RdDragon manages to get the other 3 Secret Board Hunters to stop shooting it. They walk over to it and as they slowly approach it becomes quite obvious that this is not what they were looking for. In fact, it appears to be just an ordinary GameFAQs user. Interceptor looks at the body and says, "That's not the monster. Why did you tell us it was, RdDragon?" RdDragon complains, "What? I didn't say that..." Scum walks over to the body and turns it over to reveal...FBI Porker. DUN DUN DUN! Scum then declares, "Oh great, look what you've done now, RdDragon. You killed Hammy." RdDragon retorts, "I didn't do anything. It was you bozos. And anyway...he isn't dead. You guys just modded him to death...er, not literally. He has just been suspended and now has -5023 karma." NinjaMaster says, "Hammy didn't exactly have a great record before. He is sure to be banned again now..." The others agree but decide that it's not their fault so they continue on their journey.
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Adventure: the pursuit of life. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 1/22/2005 11:14:45 AM | Message Detail
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“This is getting really boring. We are never gonna find it so I say we give up and call it a night”, says NinjaMaster. And just then a weird looking creature jumps out and starts dancing. Interceptor yells, “There it is! That’s it.” Scum informs the others, “And how appropriate that we found it on the ‘Dancing Monster’ board…” NinjaMaster then shouts with excitement, “See, RdDragon! I told you it was a monster!” RdDragon just mumbles, “Whatever, now that we’ve found it, we should probably do something besides just sit here and play he said she said.” So, after playing he said she said for only a couple of more minutes they started shooting it. After all, violence always solves everything. The Dancing Monster isn’t a board user so it can’t lose karma…but luckily their really cool guns are versatile and can do lots of other neat stuff.
Interceptor proclaims, “It’s lucky that our really cool guns are versatile and can do lots of neat stuff or we would have been in trouble.” NinjaMaster says, “So the monster is now dead, or gone, or whatever. That’s all that matters. That and the fact that it was in fact a monster like I said for a fact.” RdDragon doesn’t sound satisfied, “Sure, we got rid of it. But we don’t know how it got here or what it even was. We should have investigated before just shooting.” After Ninja once again reminds RdDragon that it was a monster Scum happily announces, “RdDragon is right again. The details don’t matter. The only thing that matters is that our journey is over in time for Late Night with Conan O’Brien.”
The Board Hunters began their trip back to the Crypt to report in and it would seem that their never-ending adventures were finally over after many grueling minutes. But suddenly, without warning, a loud voice boomed, “WARNING, WARNING, the GameFAQs environment has become unsafe. Everyone log out immediately.” Before anyone could react, a large flash blinded them and the ground began to shake. NinjaMaster cries out, “What’s going on?! I can’t move.” The others didn’t know how to answer for they also found themselves unable to do anything. After a couple of minutes all the commotion ceased. But something was different. There was an eerie feeling in the air, as if the very fabric of space and time had been altered.
RdDragon says, “Well, that was Wierd.OH well, I’m calling it a night. Later guys…have fun.” The others watch RdDragon just stand there and make a straining noise…” Interceptor bewilderedly asks, “Um, what are you doing? I thought you said you were logging out.” RdDragon looks confused, “I tried to. I couldn’t do anything. It’s as if I’m trapped in here.” A little worried, the other three also try to log out but find that they are all helpless…as if they are now a part of the Virtual World…
“Holy Tron rip-off, Batman! What do we do now?” Scum asks. Unfortunately, not even the Caped-Crusader can help them now...
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 1/22/2005 11:18:46 AM | Message Detail
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After reading Xim's story I've come to the conclusion that the character names followed by their lines is much more reader-friendly than my paragraphs with poor writing mechanics. Therefore, I'm converting to the new style on the next update. We'll just call everything up until now the Prologue...Yes, that makes a fine excuse.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: Xim
| Posted: 1/24/2005 10:10:30 PM | Message Detail
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Hehe. Awesome. I hope to see more classic sign-tapping jokes in the future. Seems you've got all the characters down right, too. I often have trouble with that in my story. I like to think that the characters in mine aren't really representations of who they are in real life, but rather just a bunch of morons that go hunting. Yep. Absolutely no correlation there. Yeah, that whole paragraph format can be pretty Wierd.OH I'm not trying to offend you, I'm just saying.
Oh, Scum annoying RdDragon. Such memories.
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...(¯\/¯)(¯) (¯)_(¯) ...R.I.P. Scum
...(_/\_)(_)(_/\_/\_)...4/18/2001 - 5/26/2003 |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 1/24/2005 11:04:18 PM | Message Detail
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I'm very offended that you would insult the paragraph format! That's the way all my favorite authors write in those novel things that are so popular. But really, I think it's mostly that I never learned how to write in school because I was always so busy catching up on my beauty sleep. So, I'm basically a self-taught writer. My instructor may be amazingly good-looking but I wouldn't recommend him for teacher of the year.
Anyway, congratulations on being my first and only reader. Thanks for your feedback.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: Cloud Tribal
| Posted: 1/26/2005 7:39:21 PM | Message Detail
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Scum...*shakes fist at arch nemesis*
I'll find him again one day...
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"If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching TV by candlelight."
Proud Member of the NBG Since Thursday, 26 Jul 2001 @ 6:42:57 PM. |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 2/7/2005 1:33:46 PM | Message Detail
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I'm putting this in my favorites. I hope you will update better than some people I know.
*eyes Infinite Rebirth and DanKirby*
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 2/7/2005 11:27:26 PM | Message Detail
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I sure hope "better" means less often!
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 2/10/2005 7:23:12 PM | Message Detail
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When can we expect the next update?
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 2/13/2005 2:05:00 AM | Message Detail
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I don't know... I haven't been spending much time on the computer lately.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 3/2/2005 6:15:07 AM | Message Detail
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Update coming soon! As in this week, probably maybe.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 3/5/2005 7:27:03 AM | Message Detail
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The week is almost over...
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: Xim
| Posted: 3/5/2005 9:37:58 AM | Message Detail
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Technically, he still has Sunday, considering it is part of the weekend.
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...(¯\/¯)(¯) (¯)_(¯) ...R.I.P. Scum
...(_/\_)(_)(_/\_/\_)...4/18/2001 - 5/26/2003 |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 3/8/2005 8:28:55 PM | Message Detail
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You guys weren't paying attention. I said this week.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 3/18/2005 9:10:53 AM | Message Detail
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It would appear that I'm not to be trusted.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: Xim
| Posted: 3/19/2005 9:55:22 AM | Message Detail
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What do you mean? I thought you were talking about two weeks ago at first, but now I realize you said this week. This week is still this week.
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...(¯\/¯)(¯) (¯)_(¯) ...R.I.P. Scum
...(_/\_)(_)(_/\_/\_)...4/18/2001 - 5/26/2003 |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 3/22/2005 8:10:55 PM | Message Detail
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You win this time by a mere technicality.
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 4/3/2005 5:50:13 AM | Message Detail
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I really will update this someday...
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 4/3/2005 2:20:46 PM | Message Detail
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let me checks my 10 year planner, someday,
*flips to next page*
not here,
*flips to last page*
ah here it is someday is right after never...
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: LCC
| Posted: 4/8/2005 10:19:39 PM | Message Detail
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A 10 year planner with 3 pages in it would come in handy for me. Where might I buy one of these tri-paged planerers?
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|."."|¯¯.|¯¯
|__.|__.|__ Don't believe everything you smell. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 4/20/2005 9:41:03 AM | Message Detail
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I don't know. But you can always do it later. Don't rush yourself!
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 5/2/2005 7:40:16 AM | Message Detail
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I've been spending most of my computer time playing World of Warcraft so this thing may not get updated for a long time...
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 5/12/2005 12:35:14 PM | Message Detail
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And now I have a job so this will have to wait until I quit or get fired.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: Xim
| Posted: 5/14/2005 8:45:08 AM | Message Detail
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Hey, I've had a job since I started my story, and that hasn't kept me from updating once every other month!
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...(¯\/¯)(¯) (¯)_(¯) ...R.I.P. Scum
...(_/\_)(_)(_/\_/\_)...4/18/2001 - 5/26/2003 |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 5/26/2005 11:34:50 AM | Message Detail
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I think you misunderstood. In my job description it specifically states that I'm not allowed to write any stories for message board posting unless authorized by the President of the Universe.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: Nega Elemental
| Posted: 5/28/2005 4:13:51 PM | Message Detail
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Well that's just wrong!
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It knocked me outta the chaiiir Ivvy! - Derek Acorah
That ese put dust in my weed! - Stoner ped |
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From: Xim
| Posted: 5/29/2005 2:01:55 PM | Message Detail
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*checks NM's papers*
By golly, he's right. I guess that means the previous poster was lying. Looks like we must sacrifice him to please the Gods.
I think all interest in my story has sort of faded. I mean, even when I am interested enough to update, I get like, maybe two responses.
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...(¯\/¯)(¯) (¯)_(¯) ...R.I.P. Scum
...(_/\_)(_)(_/\_/\_)...4/18/2001 - 5/26/2003 |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 6/9/2005 10:32:18 AM | Message Detail
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I intend to read the rest of it. Just been busy lately.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 6/20/2005 1:25:42 AM | Message Detail
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Estimated time of having a job - 3 more weeks
And then we'll see what's what.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: Arc Eda Ricolne
| Posted: 6/21/2005 4:44:33 PM | Message Detail
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Hmm...
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Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on earth. |
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From: Xim
| Posted: 6/22/2005 12:46:34 PM | Message Detail
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Aw geez, NM, you gotta continue this. I just read it again, sheer genius.
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...(¯\/¯)(¯) (¯)_(¯) ...R.I.P. Scum
...(_/\_)(_)(_/\_/\_)...4/18/2001 - 5/26/2003 |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 7/4/2005 1:30:17 AM | Message Detail
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Well, I quit my job so I do have plenty of time now...
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: WierdOH
| Posted: 7/5/2005 4:40:58 PM | Message Detail
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Interesting...
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Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 7/17/2005 4:32:32 AM | Message Detail
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And what if some day never comes?
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: ElysianEnmity
| Posted: 7/26/2005 4:42:35 PM | Message Detail
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Then we will have to make sure it does or else...
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This life of mortal breath
Is but a suburb of the life elysian. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 8/11/2005 3:38:34 AM | Message Detail
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I totally spend all my time playing World of Warcraft. So updating this soon is unlikely...
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 8/18/2005 4:42:50 PM | Message Detail
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But when the time comes...I'll put it off a little longer.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 8/28/2005 7:43:50 AM | Message Detail
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I'm thinking one update a year should be satisfactory.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 9/5/2005 8:50:15 AM | Message Detail
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Too bad this topic didn't purge along with the others. Then I'd be free from obligation!
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 9/5/2005 5:39:55 PM | Message Detail
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I better save the story so that doesn't happen.
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 9/19/2005 4:04:17 PM | Message Detail
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Actually, I think I have it saved somewhere. I'd have to look for it, though...
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: ravenwarrior
| Posted: 9/19/2005 5:51:15 PM | Message Detail
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Your story is so extremely good, that I want to make sure it wont be dying soon so I have it saved just in case something would ever happen too it.
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Now that the new $20 is in, please send all of your worthless old $20's to me.
Machine Gun specialist of the SOMUNIST AC team ~ Moonside |
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From: warutrid
| Posted: 9/19/2005 8:16:14 PM | Message Detail
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That was an awesome story. I loved how almost all of the loose ends were tied up at the end.
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\/\//-\** Progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways to do things. **|Z|_|
¯|¯|Z** Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. **][ |) |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 10/3/2005 7:11:17 AM | Message Detail
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I did get a badge in the boy scouts for knot-tying.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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From: LCC
| Posted: 10/10/2005 9:48:18 PM | Message Detail
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Would you like my seal of approval as well? It's made out of polyester!
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|."."|¯¯.|¯¯
|__.|__.|__ |
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From: NinjaMaster
| Posted: 10/26/2005 8:11:13 PM | Message Detail
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I'm allergic.
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Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy. |
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