TLT 22379: stevenpoo.
Tukrachen: tia poo
TLT 22379: check your email...
Tukrachen: i read your email...who the hell was that?
TLT 22379: mike rogers. the guy jessica atkinson was dating in the 8th grade. the one i would have died to date.
Tukrachen: why are these people coming out of the woodwork now??
Tukrachen: did she tell him about your webpage??
TLT 22379: ... i suppose so. how else would he have known. jesus christ
Tukrachen: ohhhh
Tukrachen: :-[
Tukrachen: that does not look like the blushy face it is supposed to, but oh well
TLT 22379: Steven? how am i the only person who has people from jr high looking at their webpage. nobody i know has spoken to people from jr high since... high school. why me?
Tukrachen: it's FUCKING BLUSHING, AIGHT?
TLT 22379: okie
Tukrachen: I don't know...i wouldn't want to talk to anyone i know from 8th grade...that has got to be the most awkward time in a person's life
TLT 22379: really. truly. i am embarrassed that i existed in 8th grade.
Tukrachen: lol
Tukrachen: hehehe
Tukrachen: sorry.
Tukrachen: (tteeehheee)
TLT 22379: fuck joo
Tukrachen: at least ya didn't have a mullet then
TLT 22379: no. i had a perm and braces.
TLT 22379: i played the trumpet
TLT 22379: i was in GIFTED AND FREAKING TALENTED!
TLT 22379: these are also the years when my english teacher decided to tell everyone that i was a Shakespeare lover...
Tukrachen: ahHA. THAT'S EVEN WORSE LMAO...ohoh so you were freaking talented AND RETARDED!! LOL
Tukrachen: yeah, i heard about your ill-fated affair
TLT 22379: Steven, no, really. it was bad. i barely spoke to anyone except Shanna and Shannon.
Tukrachen: he's dead...you have a perm..it wouldn't work
TLT 22379: suck it
TLT 22379: i wore bad clothes as well.
Tukrachen: suck what, o' permed one?
Tukrachen: you still do
Tukrachen: lol i wuuuuuuuuuuuv you
TLT 22379: UGH!
TLT 22379: ok, when you're able to actually brush your hair then we'll start talking about mine having been bad
TLT 22379: I'm going to go update my page like this instant.
TLT 22379: not that it'll help.
TLT 22379: now if only Brad Hardwick would read it my life would be perfect.
Tukrachen: who ever so uses aquanet pink has no leg to stand on
TLT 22379:and by the way, you dress like an old man.
Tukrachen: hey, ill read it!
Tukrachen: a DISTINGUISED old man...you undistinguished dirty laundry basket
TLT 22379: like i give a shit if you read it, Jimmy Stewart
Tukrachen: :-D
Tukrachen: lol...you haven't heard my jimmy stewart impression yet
TLT 22379: i have heard it. not only do you sound like him, you dress the part
Tukrachen: lol fuck you and your homeless clothing line
TLT 22379: ... not homeless, just never got out of bed

In other news it is break up season. It's as if my wishful words are as good as a curse. I was speaking to a friend of mine a few weeks ago and I noted several of my friends who I would like to see dump there significant others in favor of... worthwhile partners. Worthwhile to my mind at least. Two of these friends were Lance and Ryan. I think I actually said something mean about Lance's girlfriend in the last update. But anyway, amazingly enough I hear from both of them soon thereafter telling me that they came to their senses and put the boot in the correct orifice instead of on a stupid foot. I had no beef with Justin's girlfriend and they too have split. Can't blame that one on me yo, I never even met the chick or had an unkind thought about her. (Except of course those death wishes, but those were just silly fantasies that were actually more about the nether regions of Justin than having to do with his girlfriend... cause let's face it ladies, Justin's wang is off the Richter scale.)

So yes, Ryan and his head have moved back down to SC. And he and I are now planning to move to Charleston together. This should be interesting at least. If we don't talk each other to death about our emotions, their effects on us, the affects of others on them, and the inner turmoil we endure then we're going to kill each other by sheer force of clumsiness. Or with no one to wake us up we could just sleep until we starve to death. My only comfort is Ryan will go first. That's actually the most probable... No actually the most probable cause of our death would be the following scenario; One a warm sunny day in beautiful downtown Charleston Ryan and Tia begin their day by walking down the staircase of their roach infested apartment. Each is looking forward to a day filled with procrastination and sarcastic remarks. As they are about to descend to the first story Tia looks up at Ryan to explain that when the pubic area itches and it burns to pee there should be immediate medical attention paid to the area, but as she begins to speak she notices Ryan's entire body tremble. Suddenly the world goes black for Tia and Ryan and they are no more physically tied to this world. Hovering above Tia does her best to glare at Ryan without the convenience of eyes. Without actual speech she reminds him that he should have gained some weight, but he tells her that there was no way for him to know that his massive head would one day become too much for his stick figure physic to handle. Too bad Tia had been standing at his side when it happened. A shame indeed.

After having told several people that Ryan and I are planning to live together the biggest response I have gotten has been about sex. The assurance that male and female can not live together without having it. I beg to differ my friends and cast mates. Sex between Ryan and I is not only impossible because we don't want to have sex with each other, no friends, it is a physical impossibility. Look at Ryan. Look at me. Does that seem like it would work out right. Uh uh, no folks, it wouldn't.

The other thing that people seem to be concerned about with me living with someone of the opposite sex is me NOT getting ass. They assume if I'm living with one guy, no other guys are going to want to go out with me because of the assumption that Ryan and I are screwing. My logical response to this is: Who the hell cares? It's not like I'm getting ass now, is it?

The Gays are trying to party me to death. You rainbow people are too much for me. I fold. Go have your homo parties with others. I am not man nor woman enough to handle it. My feet may be forever deformed. It gives new meaning to the term dancing queen. I would like to note that it is really really wrong for gorgeous gay men to tease hetero women about sleeping with them. Sexual arousal is not physically comfortable for chicks either yo. I have also been told that my website ignores my gay friends and focuses on those who practice sexual relations that can actually produce offspring. I'm a bigot, what can I say? So without further ado I'd like to give a "shout out" (I actually just used the term shout out yall) to: Chris, Heather, Brianna, Milli, Tonda, Charles, Raymie, "Claus", and Jennifer. Hey Bri, no. That's right, never... well never again anyway haha. I would also like to take this moment to say that techno music sucks. It makes me want to cut the balls off of ants. It has no redeeming value. None. The value of hippies who rap is much much higher. The value of rednecks who rap is much much higher. The value of people with down's syndrome who jack off in public is higher. I'd rather listen to "Ice Ice Baby" 3494 times in a row than listen to one techno "song," if it can even be called that. There is no lower form of music, if it can be called that. I'm sorry. It makes my uterus hurt.

Steven, Justin, I do not have a "talking thing."

Adia Marie Horvath was born on January 10th weighing a whooping 9 pounds and 2 ounces. Poor Brandy gave an all natural birth to the 21 and 1/2 inch bouncing baby girl. Like the lying whore she has always been she reports that the pain is "something you will forget."
Possible Nicknames: Shitty Ass and WhoaBabyFart

Ethan Marshall Capps was born on February 11th weighing in at 8 pounds and 8 ounces. Ethan was also 21 and 1/2 inches long, 19 of which is penis. His penis is now recovering from being cut upon. Shanna got good drugs and says that "It was quite nice."
Possible Nicknames: Big Penis and Alien

So with the feeling of love in the air, and I actually do love people, I'm not as mean as you think, I decided to tell a guy friend of mine that I've had a crush on him for the last forever. I won't mention his name cause he's shy and shit yo. But yes, I spilled all in a letter. Twas a lovely way to embarrass myself without leaving the house. I'm talented. But he's a sweetie and hasn't mentioned the fact that I'm a retard. That could be good or bad. He could think that I've lost my mind and will maybe forget that I sent the letter if he doesn't mention it and then he can run far far away from me. Or he's just being nice and trying to let me save face by not saying, "Yo Tia, I know I'm hot and shit but I never knew you wanted me THAT badly... of course I always knew you wanted me, I am all things to all women... but to that degree..." Hopefully it's the latter.

So in the name of Valentine's and the spirit of love I've prepared a list of the top five crushes ever to render me senseless and let others enjoy the general foolishness of my actions. You will notice that some of the crushes overlap each other. Who says you can't love more than one person at a time yo? So here we go:

5. Mike Rogers (circa 8th and 9th grade)
Met: In band
Eye color: Blue
Deciding factor: music
Words most heard coming out of Tia's mouth: "I hate Jessica Atkinson."
Mike was a sweetie. He had a girlfriend, Jessica Atkinson, she was a bitch, I hated her. They dated forever. He was the only other person I knew cool enough to like the doors. He made me laugh. And he was a good kisser. hehe.

4. Brad Hardwick (circa 4th 5th 6th, most of 7th, and very briefly in 8th grade)
met: duh. eye color: Brown Deciding factor: He wasn't scared of me.
Since I grew much faster than everyone else in my grade and I was pretty mean most guys were kinda scared I was gonna kick their asses. Until 7th grade, when everybody got taller than me, I towered over Brad by a good 5 inches. Didn't stop me from completely falling in puppy love with him. I guess we were what you would call friends and he'd always let me wear his necklaces, bracelets, rings, and jacket. Which always meant a great deal to me. I savored the smell of him. hehe. Anyway, he never seemed to return the feeling so I gave up. Which now that I look back on it I can see that we were both just waiting for the other one to say, "hey, I like you." But we were both too shy. Then in 10th grade the fucker gets the balls to pay me some serious attention. Too bad I was already dating, and happy with, Lance. How do you like that for fate. I'm not sure if it was so much of a crush on his part at that point or a painful desire to get into my pants. Either way, the attention would have worked much better two or three years prior. But I still have the note he wrote to me in the 4th grade with one of those new fangled gold metallic markers. It was a heart with mine and his name on it. aww. I'd like to see Brad again. I haven't actually talked to him in years and years. But I still remember his birthday is Jan. 16th and he likes to have his back rubbed in a certain spot that makes him almost fall asleep. I had a lot of fun with Brad.

3. This is the current crush so I shall have to wait for it to go away before I can wane poetic about it.

4. Albert John Lechette aka: AJ, A-uh-ma-jay, and flatback. (circa off and on since I met him until like 98 or something)
met: sometime when I was in 7th grade. Eye color: The blue of a million sapphires
Deciding factor: He made me laugh like I was being held hostage by evil stand up comics.
Firsts: He was the first person to call me Tiapet, I was the first person to point out that he had no ass.
I had met AJ when I was in 7th or 8th grade and though he was a hottie who shared some of the same friends I did we really didn't start hanging out a lot until Shannon started dating Chad Truax. I was Shannon's best friend, AJ was Chad's. They would take us on dates as entertainment. We argued constantly. We were so mean to each other that I'm surprised we could walk away with our egos intact after some of our verbal combats. Sometimes he'd say something cruel about me that was so hilarious that even I had to laugh. You can't help it, you have to laugh at AJ. He's a retard. And I mean that literally. There would be years when I wanted nothing but AJ, then there would be years when I thought that if I ever dated him we would end up killing each other. It was a fucked up situation. One night while surrounded by a bunch of other people I pulled AJ to the side and finally told him that I had had a crush on him for umpteen years... and then I walked away from him, got into my car, and drove home with out waiting for him to give a response to my declaration. Then I was so embarrassed that I moved away haha and didn't see him or talk to him for years. I finally saw him the other night, and for all of you ladies out there looking for a single guy, somehow AJ looks better than he did in high school. I have no idea how this is possible. And if you happen to ever read this AJ don't get a big ego, I've seen your excuse for an ass. (I would like to make a post it about the guy AJ was with when I last saw him. Bobby Hayes. You remember Steve Hayes' little brother. The only thing I can say is, damn. That is maybe the hottest motherfucker I have seen in South Carolina since Elvis died.) 1. Lance Hutto (circa some of 94 thru 98)
Eye Color: Molten Honey
Deciding factor: everything about him.
Firsts: almost everything.
I thought Lance was the most gorgeous creature god could have put on this Earth. Add that to the fact that he made me laugh, he would cuddle with me while watching TV, I could hang out, get wasted, and have a good time with him, and I thought he was the most gorgeous creature god could have put on this Earth and you have the equation for major crushage. This was the most intense crush I have ever had to deal with. If I was not thinking about, with, or talking to Lance I was sleeping or in a coma. We were best friends. Or so he thought. All I wanted to do was throw him down and molest him. I didn't even tell my friends about how badly I liked him until it could no longer be hidden. And when I did tell them they all said, "We know." Guess I wasn't very good at hiding it. I would stare at nothing with a huge grin on my face. It went on for months. The agony of being the best friend of the only person in the world you have the serious urge to rape and then take to the police to report yourself because you feel bad about doing it. I would go watch hours of baseball practice. I hate baseball. We talked on the phone more in the first year I knew him then I think I ever talked before or since. I hate talking on the phone. We would stay up all night talking and then we would go to school, and I was happy about this situation. I was exhausted but damnit I was the happiest sleep deprived person I've ever known. I've kept diaries since I was 12. To illustrate how bad it was here is a little excerpt from it:

" 2-21-95

Dear Diary,
I love him! I just got off the phone with him. It gets worse every time I talk to him or see him. I went to his baseball practice today and he was so cute in his baseball outfit! I love him! The only reason I got off the phone with him was because his mom made him. The other night he called me at 9:00 and we didn't get off the phone until 3:00! Then I couldn't get to sleep because of thinking of him. The funny thing is the next day I wasn't sleepy, I was happy all day. I've never felt this way before. Well I better go and try to sleep, but I doubt I will! Love Tia" and signed at the bottom is a little "I (think I) love Daniel Lance Hutto" hehe. Here's another one:

"3-1-95

Dear Diary,
I still love him, it won't stop. I think about him constantly. I see him more now since I'm 16. We went to the movies together, alone for once. The movie was good, the part I saw anyway. I couldn't concentrate on it because his thigh was pressed against mine and his hand and arm kept touching mine. It's ten times worse than any crush I've ever had! I love him! Well I better go, I'm about to fall out! I've only had 3 hours of sleep in 4 days because of him! I hope I can sleep tonight! I doubt it!
Love, Tia."

But enough about love. Let's talk about Craig Kilborn and Ashton Kutcher and which name is more fey. No let's don't. Let's talk about Comedy Central's good and great choice of Valentine's day programming. This morning they had the SNL rerun where Brendan Fraser hosted and did a skit where he was Xena. Tonight they played a SNL rerun where Brendan Fraser was hosting and did a skit as a Fat Cooking Lady. Not to mention that they often run Airhead's and Encino Man. I'm going to have to watch Comedy Central more often. VH1 also deserves major kudos for putting Rob Thomas in the top 25 sexiest people.

All these people having babies! I dreamed last night that I didn't know I was pregnant until like two days before the delivery. Now what was really fucked up was I had an Asian baby and couldn't remember sleeping with an Asian guy. Then I was homeless with my Asian baby. It was fucked up all around and has kinda put me off of having any Asian babies for a while. Which if I did turn up pregnant the Pope would have to be notified. "Sometimes I think I may be going crazy from sexual frustration." ~ Chick in some movie that previews all the time on the video in my store.

Ryan. He's missing again. I spoke with him once and he said that he was not missing and there were no wild women holding him hostage. He said that he was now living in poverty but would be taking his computer back up (where ever up is) with him and I would hear more from him. This was a lie of Satan.

And now I'll leave you with the lyrics to the most romantic song I've ever heard. Enjoy.

I love myself
I want you to love me
When I feel down
I want you above me
I search myself
I want you to find me
I forget myself
I want you to remind me

I don't want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
Ooh I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no

You're the one
who makes me come running
You're the sun
who makes me shine
When you're around
I'm always laughing
I want to make you mine
I close my eyes
And see you before me

Think I would die
If you were to ignore me
A fool could see
Just how much I adore you
I get down on my knees
I do anything for you

I don't want anybody else
When I think about you
I touch myself
Ooh I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no

I love myself
I want you to love me
When I feel down
I want you above me
I search myself
I want you to find me
I forget myself
I want you to remind me

I don't want anybody else
When I think about you
I touch myself
Ooh I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no
I want you
I don't want anybody else
And when I think about you
I touch myself
Ooh, ooh, oo, oo ahh I don't want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
Ooh I don't want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself

I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself
I honestly do
I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself
I honestly do
I touch myself
I touch myself
I touch myself

Yeah, so I decided this whole dating thing wasn't working out for me. All people thinking of moving to Dillon please note that the guys here suck. The ones I've met anyway. So I made myself a page where maybe I can find Love on AOL. Whoa. Dude. I just said that. So blah. Here it be. Steven has decided that he shall add to this. That should be fun. He says he's "going to give the male perspective" of why people should date me. I feel like a crappy game show prize.

I have realized that hints and even taking the time to make a fucking Gift List doesn't work. People still give you fucked up shit. So with the help of Amazon.com I decided that I would just pick the shit out and yall could just Buy Me Shit. Even if you don't know me you can still Buy Me Shit. Cause I like it when people Buy Me Shit. In fact I think if you're reading this right now you should go Buy Me some Shit.

Yeah and I've been kinda depressed lately. I hate Dillon. I hate the people in Dillon. I hate snow. I hate Christmas. I'd like to have a boyfriend to share all this happiness with, but I don't. I hate seeing all the people I went to high school with. They're either fucked up really bad or much better off than I'd like for them to be. They depress me either way. I hate (love) my fucking truck, my gramps keeps telling me he's going to buy me a new car... but I don't see a fucking new car anywhere. I guess he figures right before I decide to commit suicide by running my truck into a hot guy he'll surprise me with it. I hate surprises. All in all things have been kinda bleak. But hey, in the immortal words of Pink, some times it bes that way.

Oh yeah. One last thing. I've started keeping the updates on a page here. Cause If one more person asks me about "hey what was it you said about this or that?" Jeremy is going to speak loudly. How the fuck should I know? It's all lies anyway. LIES ALL LIES. People get a life and stop trying to memorize my pitiful excuse for one.

Oh yeah. One more last thing. I made a Mail Bag and a FAQ page. But I wouldn't go there unless you're bored in the extreme.

12.10.01

TLT 22379: stevenpoo
Tukrachen: hey tia poo! i'm just talking shit...my favorite past time as of late
TLT 22379: indeed
Tukrachen: what are you doing?
TLT 22379: just got finished watching "walking with prehistoric beasts"
TLT 22379: twas neat
Tukrachen: damn, i missed it! i forgot about it
TLT 22379: oh to be sure they'll have it on another 50 times this month. and they said it was available to own for the low price of only $39.99... if you must really watch it
TLT 22379: i've watched so much of the discovery channel in the past week a chick from the BBC is now narrating my thoughts
Tukrachen: LMAO
Tukrachen: "when the tia mates, she carries the eggs into her tree...the tia lays the eggs and then she dies...."
TLT 22379: oh god how horrible!
TLT 22379: at least make me a mammal
TLT 22379: I'M WARM BLOODED GODDAMNIT! (despite public opinion)
Tukrachen: ok..."the tia humps the leg of her owner when he comes home...brendan fraser, a huge tia lover, has a tia at home..."
TLT 22379: oh how i do wish
Tukrachen: well tia honey, i need to go to sleep
TLT 22379: as opposed to "the steven mates only with the most extreme of his species, the never ending cycle of mating with abnormalities has made this species the most evolutionarily changed in history."
TLT 22379: night night
Tukrachen: blah
TLT 22379: boo
TLT 22379: spit
TLT 22379: heckle
TLT 22379: just couldn't come up with a good comeback eh?
Tukrachen: i'm TIRED...i have a HEADACHE and i'm SO STRESSED out right now....hehe kidding...whew, that's obnoxious
TLT 22379: "OH MY GOD, THAT IS SO NOT FAIR!"
TLT 22379: why are you stressed?
TLT 22379: you should be stress free since your migration from kristy's back to your normal feeding grounds
Tukrachen: i'm stressed because my boyfriend knows that i have a birthmark on my leg the size of pangaea....oh ME!
TLT 22379: by the way, both of your parents are freaks of nature
Tukrachen: hehe just playin
Tukrachen: why??
TLT 22379: not just because they produced you...
TLT 22379: haha. your dad is a freak in a good way. he asked me weird questions
TLT 22379: it's kinda cute
Tukrachen: yeah, had to laugh at your own jokes huh?
Tukrachen: like what questions?
TLT 22379: yeah i did
TLT 22379: i don't remember. like "want some of this? why not? not hungry? already ate? have a camel hump?"
Tukrachen: my dad has always reminded me of an aging little boy
Tukrachen: lol yeah, that's my dad
TLT 22379: must be his way of coping with your mom
TLT 22379: she wasn't that bad though
Tukrachen: he was really the best when i was younger...he hid candy under my bed in the morning
TLT 22379: aww
Tukrachen: and put plastic spiders in the coffee cups in the morning to scare mom
Tukrachen: which leads me to the question: how long can you be fooled by something before it DOESN'T SURPRISE YOU ANYMORE?
Tukrachen: well, for my mom....
Tukrachen: the laughs were. always. there.
TLT 22379: is that the reason she's the way she is? "have you gotten your breakfast? have i checked the coffee cups for spiders? have you ironed your shirt? is that a stain on your pants? am i running out of breath?"
Tukrachen: as space ghost once said..."yeah, let's drink to love. and let's drink coffee until our hearts stop"
Tukrachen: LMAO
Tukrachen: good one
Tukrachen: i'm going to save this conversation and show mom
TLT 22379: fuck if i can remember a single thing from that cartoon last night except "pretty girl hair"
Tukrachen: lol...whew, you were high
TLT 22379: and i remember me wishing i were a chemestry major so i could use a line about mercury more often... just don't remember the line
Tukrachen: oh wait...i remember
TLT 22379: chemistry
Tukrachen: he said that mercury was one of the more likable elements of the chart or something....uh....republicans ARE POTENTIAL FASCISTS!!
TLT 22379: yeah i enjoyed it... kind of... but the reason i don't smoke that often is because i spend the entire time i'm high trying to remember what the fuck is going on?
Tukrachen: lol
TLT 22379: john donne is AN IMMORAL FORNICATOR!
TLT 22379: excuse me. JON DON
Tukrachen: yeah, i realize halfway through a "deep thought" just to go right ahead and shut the fuck up while i'm behind
Tukrachen: jon don demarco
TLT 22379: i remember at one point just staring at you last night saying "I have no idea what the fuck you just said"
TLT 22379: haha me too
Tukrachen: edgar allan poe IS A DARK ROMANTIC PEDOPHILE!!
TLT 22379: what was it you asked me if i had read and i said "i don't know, but i read the alpha male?" btw that line is NOT in that commercial. i just wished it were
Tukrachen: those are the worse moments...because no one is calling you out on your bullshit
Tukrachen: you have to learn to shut up by yourself
TLT 22379: haha yeah. which is why i was kinda quiet... except for the irrelevant giggling
Tukrachen: oh that....THAT was hilarious...i asked if you read brave new world and then you said that and then i didn't know what the fuck you were talking about
TLT 22379: LMFAO
TLT 22379: i lost myself somewhere along elephantitus. and came back during orgasmo
Tukrachen: and then patrick is hilarious when he's really high...one time there was something we were watching and he said in a very serious, disturbed tone (he was just laying on the bed) "that was so funny...but i'm too fucked up to laugh"
Tukrachen: lol
TLT 22379: lol
Tukrachen: you have to like patrick
TLT 22379: i hate techno music. i spent 10 minutes trying to figure out if i were having a heart attack then i realized i was laying in front of a speaker
TLT 22379: he's cool
Tukrachen: oh yeah...that is true...sometimes his shit will drive me and gretta nuts and we have to just say ok, take this shit out
TLT 22379: i would have sucked his dick to change the cd. i almost cried with joy when the tv came on
Tukrachen: i can't imagine him ever getting in a fight with some one
Tukrachen: hey, i was pushing the orgazmo...thank ME
TLT 22379: but that was such a lame movie dude
Tukrachen: yes, i saw the child-like wonder in your eyes when the tv came on
TLT 22379: haha
TLT 22379: YAY FOR TV
Tukrachen: it was a lame movie, but it was a lame funny movie....
Tukrachen: seriously
TLT 22379: although the later half of joe merrick really was fucking with me
TLT 22379: did i actually ask if it were possible for him to have sex?
Tukrachen: yeah, ..actually, that one "SeaLab" cartoon fucked with me
Tukrachen: yep...sure did.
TLT 22379: indeed, i remember you explaining the cartoons to me HAHAHAHA
TLT 22379: the stick in front of water haha
Tukrachen: the one with the cartoons switching heads onto each other's bodies....what?? i explained them to you? why did i do that?
TLT 22379: i have no fucking clue
Tukrachen: honey, i have no idea what you are talking about...well, i was high too
TLT 22379: but you said something about a stick in front of water and i was like "ok, i get that"
Tukrachen: the FUCK?
Tukrachen: hmmmm
Tukrachen: hmmm pot BAD
TLT 22379: space ghost sighing was really funny for some reason
Tukrachen: lol...no, space ghost giving the "let's drink coffee until our hearts stop line gets me every time
TLT 22379: i don't remember that
Tukrachen: space ghost telling the camp fire story to hanson?
Tukrachen: about the guy with a comb for a hand?
TLT 22379: oh oh oh mecury:rectal thermometer. would you eat a rectal thermometer?
TLT 22379: yeah i remember that. why did he need a comb?
Tukrachen: lol nevermind...dammit, is it such a good idea to try and remember things that we did when we were HIGH?
TLT 22379: "mercury, sweetest of the transitional elements" oh my god i love that I REMEMBER!
Tukrachen: oh yeah, the rectal thermometer? that was hilarious!!!
TLT 22379: no we should probably stop now. but some of that shit that happened last night was hilarious. i'd like to remember it so i can laugh some other time
Tukrachen: god that was fucked up
Tukrachen: WON'T HAPPEN. well...i do need to go....i will talk to you later, tia-poo
TLT 22379: night night sugarloaf

12.02.01

Strangely enough I saw the Long Lost Ryan’s screen name online the other night. I think it was his girlfriend though cause when I said “Hey sweetie, WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?” his screen name replied “Who the fuck are you?” So I’m guessing Ryan has been taken over by a savage female who doesn’t let him get online. These things happen.

NEW STUFF: I'm currently working on a "mailbag" page because I've been getting so much e-mail about this site lately. I thought everyone would enjoy reading what kind of crap people send me.