Alternative:

New York was truly the city that never slept. People were up wandering around the city at two in the morning. Normally Danny wouldn’t be one of them, but tonight was different. Tonight he was reliving hard memories. Memories he’d rather keep buried deep inside. Danny liked his job.

He wasn’t obsessed with it. He could take a few days off of work and not be a total wreck. He certainly didn’t spend his every waking moment thinking about his job. Danny knew he was good at. He was good at the whole detective thing and he did enjoy it. He did enjoy taking the bad guy down and helping families have some kind of closure.

He knew most of the people on the team had their own problems and he had his own as well he just didn’t like to announce them to the whole office. No one needed to know his issues. They just needed to know that he was a good agent with his straight on.

Of course some times every once in awhile when Danny wasn’t looking he wasn’t so sure that he did have his head straightened on properly. He thought back to his childhood so many times trying to remember the happy times with his parents. He tried to get past everything that happened after their death all the bad things he was still trying to atone for.

He tried to look past all the bad times with his parents because not everything had been picture perfect. His dad had been a strict man and most of the time he was yelling at his mother in Spanish for something. There were too few memories for Danny to remember and maybe that’s why he had started drinking. To ease the pain a bit.

Only alcohol served as more of a problem than a solution. He’d get drunk and yell and scream and he knew that he was throwing away his career and part of him didn’t care. He had been so tied up in forget the pain of the past that he didn’t look at his future. His future was considerable brighter than his brother’s.

He had chances. He had opportunities. He had a life and he almost pissed all over it. He got sober though and it had been a rough going, but he had done it. He had tried to lift all that pain and guilt, but maybe a little bit of it still hung about because he never really did talk about what happened on that day in the car.

There had been yelling and Danny knew that he had finally had enough of it. he didn’t know what possessed him to pick that exact moment while his father should have been doing anything besides yelling, but he had.

He didn’t know what was going to happen and if he really put stock into all those church sermons he had gone to as a kid with his parents and even after he was in foster homes he would have thought it was some higher power.

Some higher power had seen it fit to take his parents away from him when he was just a boy and send him to foster home after foster home none better than the others. In fact if Danny were honest he would have said they gradually got worse as time went on.

He had been sent to counseling. He had spat in the counselor’s faces every opportunity he got. He had been a rebel a wild kid. They all had thought he was going to end up the way of his brother who got into even more trouble than Danny could ever get into as a kid.

Danny had lost touch with his brother over the years. Not that he had wanted to lose touch, but it had just happened. His job kept him pretty occupied even though he wasn't the job. Jack… Jack was the job. Jack was a perfect example of what the job could do to you. On the verge of divorce with his kids hating him and a one-night stand that last longer than intended.

Danny knew about Sam. Everyone in the office knew about Sam. It wasn’t hard when it was staring you in the face. Danny knew Sam really had genuine feelings for Jack. It was quiet possible that she was in love with him and wouldn’t that just be great for her. Because Jack could never really love her back.

Even if he separated from his wife and became a weekend father and started devoting less time to the job and more time to human contact. He and Sam could never really be. Or maybe Danny was wrong. Maybe Sam would get her knight in shining armor. He certainly hoped the best for her he really did. No one deserved to have his or her ex right in front of their face day in and day out.

Sam was nice too, even if she was a bit standoffish. It wasn’t the job that made her that way though. She had already been that way from whatever had gone on with her family. Danny didn’t know much about her past. Not that that wasn’t okay. It wasn’t like anyone really knew anything about his past.

He was formulating a theory now. A theory that the FBI wasn’t much more than a place for people who were miscreants in their past and were trying to clean up for it. Oh sure there was the occasional person like Jack who wanted to piss of his father when by joining the Bureau and those lucky few like Vivian that actually felt they were making a difference in the world trigger ready and fastidious.

Danny had thought he fit in that category, but now he wasn’t so sure. Maybe he really was doing this as some twisted form of punishment to his psyche. What had Jack said about using his FBI career to relive his parent’s deaths? It still rang in his head Jack’s words. He had laughed it off before, but maybe it wasn’t so laugh worthy in light of new evidence. Maybe it actually made sense.

And damn Jack for trying to minimize Danny’s life. Danny knew it wasn’t true. Jack just wanted Danny to be happy. He knew that. Jack had been somewhat of a father figure to Danny despite Jack’s various screw ups with his own life.

Jack was a good man and a great agent. Danny wished he could be like Jack when it came to work. He was good at deciphering things, they all were, but Jack was like a bloodhound on some things. Danny found it admiral that Jack would go to such lengths to apprehend suspects and find missing people just so others could have peace of mind because with the job they did it was hard to go home at night and find peace of mind yourself.

Danny knew. He knew how hard some cases could hit this one being a prime example. Sure some had hit the mark. Cases about missing kids were always tough especially if they were tied some way indirectly or directly to the state foster care system. Cases where alcoholism was present stung at times too, but never majorly.

Danny hadn’t been this effected by a case since he was a rookie. Just every aspect of it had stung and left a new mark. So viciously that Danny had thought, for more than the normal second, about going to some bar a drinking. Drinking as much as he could and Danny knew that was a lot.

His tolerance for alcohol had gotten bigger as time went on, but he couldn’t risk his sobriety. Couldn’t throw away close seven years for one drink. Sure he always thought about alcohol. They said it would always be on his mind and he knew what they meant now.

Because drinking was always on his mind just never at the forefront. Not like it had been after the case had been solved and Clare had been found. Not like it had after he had held Clare close to him after spilling his secret to someone he barely even knew though he knew he could relate to her.

Not like it had after he had whispered to her that it would all be okay. Not like it had when Clare had insisted on talking to him one last time before she was carted away to the hospital. Not like it had when she had whispered the soft thanks in his ear and told him that his parents didn’t want him to end up on the path she had been headed down.

He had smiled at her a soft sad smile, but a smile nonetheless. Not the famous Danny smirk with the pouty lips. No, this had been a real smile and Danny had forced the tears at bay.

Clare had looked serene when she had said it. As though the message had come through her directly from his parents. Danny knew that wasn’t true, but it was nice to think about. He knew she had been doped up on whatever latest medication the paramedics had been allowed to distribute to her.

She couldn’t possibly know that Danny had already been down that path. That he had taste the sweet taste of liquor and had even tried the blissful oblivion of drugs if only once before he knew that it wasn’t for him.

Worse he knew what it was like to hold a knife in his hand or to stand at the edge of a bridge and look down at the fifty-foot fall. He knew how tempting it had been to just end it all. The pain would melt away so easily, but he hadn’t the courage.

Or at least he thought it was courage he was looking for. It was more like fear. Because to take your life, that was the ultimate cowards way out no courage required only unforgiving fear. Fear that made you so blind that you couldn’t see what you were doing was just plain stupid.

Danny never had enough fear and he wondered some times if that was a good thing. He certainly had enough fear to try, just the one time, but he knew it wasn’t enough because he hadn’t died. Bodies were fragile things. Lives were fragile things and it was so easy to take one, but Danny couldn’t. So he had held on to what little hope he had left and this is where he had ended up.

On Time Square which wasn’t as bustling as it usually would be during work hours, but it was almost two in the morning with all manner of people, some questionable in their actions, wandering around just as aimlessly as he was. He had cultivated this perfect image of himself and the person he wanted to be.

Charming, charismatic, confident and a whole bunch of other c words he couldn’t think of at the moment. For the most part he had succeeded in making that image real. He believed he was Danny Taylor. He had worked hard to become Danny Taylor and in a lot of ways it was him. It was who he had grown to be. He had grown up not become fake because a lot of the qualities he had now he had always had.

The hard outer shell was something you developed through time. He knew he had one even though he hid it under layers of sarcasm and expensive suits. It was there though as glaring as a red flag to a bull if anyone bothered to look. No one really did. Not at work which was where it would probably show the most.

When he was out for a night on the town or on a date he put up a different front. Someone had said that everyone was an actor on a stage. Danny thought it was Shakespeare, but he also didn’t think that Shakespeare had wanted Danny to take it the way Danny was taking it. No one really knew everything about him and Danny liked to keep it that way.

Except there was Martin. Sweet embarrassingly shy Martin. Could be a go-getter when he wanted to be and did an amazing job everyday of his life. He cracked easier than Danny about the job, but it let Danny know that Martin was human, more human than he appeared to be sometimes.

Martin fell into the category of wanting to make a difference in the world because Martin truly believed that he was making a difference in the world. He of course had another agenda what with his father’s shadow hanging over him at every waking moment. From what Danny had gleamed from the various conversations was that Victor Fitzgerald had actually wanted a different path for his son.

Danny found this odd as most FBI agents he knew would have liked their kids to follow in their footsteps, though Danny supposed if he had a kid he would never want them to lead this life.

It had been so easy to pick on Martin in the beginning. He was easy prey half the time and a challenge the other half. They had a tentative friendship of sorts long before the truce in California. Danny had felt compelled to touch Martin every chance he got. He had done so in the first few weeks of Martin joining them.

Danny remembered how he would purposefully brush against Martin or touch him to tell him he was leaving to check up on a lead. He remembered about a month or so after Martin had arrived and they were working on the Eve Cleary case. Danny had been going off to check on the modeling agency Eve had been with while Jack debriefed the others.

He had touched Martin’s shoulder as somewhat of a goodbye. Martin had looked up clearly confused and putting the pieces together of all the times Danny had touched him for no reason. Danny knew he had been caught and had stopped quickly after that.

Danny wasn’t even sure when things had shifted he was only aware that they had. He remembered coming over to Martin’s apartment with Chinese take out and an action movie the night that Martin and Jack had to transport Graham Spaulding.

Danny had just known that was going to be a tough case for Martin and it had been. Martin had been an utter wreck and Danny had made it his personal mission to cheer Martin up. It had worked, somewhat. In California, Danny had been nice to Martin lying and saying it was Jack’s doing.

Martin seemed to know better though. There had been tense times between them sure, but for the most part there was something building. Something that Danny needed to ground him right now.

He hailed a cab. An easy feat even though it was two in the morning on a Thursday night… or perhaps it was a Friday morning. That was the technical way to look at it.

“So where you headed kid?” The driver asked.

“Queens.” Danny replied easily enough and he closed his eyes to enjoy his cab ride to Martin’s.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When Danny arrived at Martin’s in front of his front door knowing that he looked rather lost and as though he had been crying he was starting to rethink his approach. Maybe he could catch another cab and go home to his own small dingy apartment. He didn’t want to though. He didn’t want to be alone right now.

He hadn’t given into the temptation of drinking, but that didn’t mean he still didn’t feel empty. Because he did he felt very empty at the moment. Empty and exhausted and he would to just like find one person in the whole city that could make him think life was worth it. For some reason Martin was that person.

So he rang the bell and he rang it again and again and he even knocked a few times before he heard the door click open and saw Martin, hair disheveled, eyes filled with sleep as he tried to figure out who exactly was waking him up at two in the morning when he had to go to work soon.

He was wearing a T-shirt and boxers and boy didn’t that just make Danny think that his idea was a good one after all. He didn’t know what it was about Martin. Danny had never considered himself gay. Yeah he looked at the occasional guy, but it wasn’t like he wanted to date them or even have sex with them. With Martin things were different. Things were up in the air.

“Danny, what are you doing here? It’s two in the morning.” Martin said as though Danny either didn’t own a watch or he couldn’t tell time.

“Yeah, I know man. Sorry for waking you up, but…”

“Is something wrong? I mean you didn’t show up at the office after you and Jack went after Clare so I thought that there might be something up. Jack said you went home.” Martin said.

“I didn’t. Not really anyway. I’ve been wandering the streets.”

“For the last four hours?” Martin said concern evident in his voice.

“Yeah, I know stupid. Could have been mugged or something, but I wasn’t. I just… can I come in.” Danny asked hoping he didn’t sound to hopeful or desperate.

“Yeah sure, come in.” Martin said moving away from the doorway so that Danny could step into his apartment.

“Look I really am sorry I work you up, man, but I just. I was amped up. Wired. Guess it was the five cups of coffee I drank.”

“Coffee’s bad for you Danny. You shouldn’t be drinking all that.”

“It’s better than the alternative.”

“What’s the alternative?”

“Never ending glasses of scotch.” Realization dawned for Martin and his lips formed a perfect ‘o’ shape that had Danny thinking about some not so clean thoughts.

“Anyway, I couldn’t go home. I just… I needed to be near… people you know. A person.”

“Okay, well, I guess that makes sense.” Martin said, but Danny knew it didn’t make any sense to Martin and that Martin was just placating him because that was what friends did for each other.

“No you don’t.”

“Yes I do. Remember I was in your position not to long ago with the Spaulding case. I know what you’re feeling.”

“Not exactly.”

“Danny, I’m trying to sympathize here. Shared war stories and all.” Martin said with that self-deprecating smile on his face. Danny wondered if he knew that it was self-deprecating.

“Martin, there are things… about my past. Things you wouldn’t believe.” “I’m sure it can’t be all that bad.”

“It is. I mean there are good parts. Ever story has to have a few good parts right.”

Now Danny was being self-deprecating. He really was no good at this sharing feelings thing. The only reason he had told Clare was because he wanted to get through to her. Seemed to be a whole different ball game with Martin standing there still sleepy but intently hanging on Danny’s every word.

“I guess so.” Martin replied.

“It’s just that today… with this case. It really got to me.”

“I can understand that.”

“But you can’t understand why.”

“Does it have something to do with inner demons? Something to do with the fact that you were able to figure out that it was Clare who pushed her mother off of that ledge?” Danny stared at Martin puzzled. He didn’t think that Martin would be able to put it together.

“Don’t look so surprised that I figured something out. What kind of detective would I be if I hadn’t picked up on your total desperation to help this girl. So tell me Danny, who’s the monster in your past?”

Danny felt as though he were drained. He flopped ungracefully down on Martin’s couch and placed his hands on the sides of his forehead as he rocked back and forth. He barely registered Martin coming over to him and placing a hand on his back rubbing soothing circles and whispering hushed words of comfort.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Martin said quietly.

“There’s just so many you know.”

“Not personally, but I can kind of see where you’re coming from.”

“It’s just I was so much like her. I am so much like her. She broke down though. I don’t know if I never really broke down. I sort of… spiraled downwards for a little while.”

“But you got back up. Clare can probably get back up to.”

“It’s a hard thing to bear. Thinking you killed your parents. I mean in her case she really did kill her mother, even though it was an accident so I guess she’s entitled to have a psychotic episode. The thing is, I know what id did was an accident. I know that what happened wasn’t really my fault. I guess I just don’t know if I handled it better than she did.”

“What are you saying Danny?” Martin said feeling as though he had come into the movie halfway through.

“My parents died in a car crash when I was eleven. When I was little I used to think it was my fault, because I distracted my dad while he was driving and he swerved. Some times I still think about it. It’s what cause me to drink.” Danny said and he’s perfectly aware that he’s spilling his guts to Martin, but it’s better than the alternative.

“It wasn’t your fault Danny, but you were entitled to a little breakdown. Your parents died. That had to have been rough.” Martin said as though he’s realizing the meaning behind every comment that Danny’s every made about parents and the foster care system and his whole out look on life in general.

“It was, but I’m not looking for pity Martin. I just needed to talk to someone.”

“I’m glad you thought that someone was me.” Martin said smiling brightly.

Danny suddenly became aware of just how close Martin really was. He was very close. So close in fact that if Danny leaned over their lips would brush together. Danny was feeling brave at this very moment and suddenly it didn’t matter that this was probably a stupid idea to get involved with a coworker and not just any coworker the Deputy Director’s son.

Danny knew if they were caught he’d be shipped off to Alaska so fast it would give him whiplash. Danny knew that if there was a the slightest chance that his feelings were reciprocated that Martin more than likely was keeping them bottled up so they wouldn’t get into trouble. At this moment Martin was making his life worth some so at this moment Danny needed Martin.

It was rash and impulsive and probably one of the stupidest things he’d ever did in his life, but Danny couldn’t really complain when he brushed his lips against Martin’s soft if not a bit chapped lips. Really couldn’t complain when the brush turned into more of a kiss and Martin wasn’t complaining.

In fact Martin’s hands had began to clutch at Danny’s sides as though he were afraid to let go. Danny was sure he could get lost in a kiss like this. He could get lost in kissing Martin. He could generally just get lost in Martin.

Somewhere along the line tongues came into play and Danny reveled in the fact that Martin, though reciprocating Danny’s actions, was letting Danny take the lead. Was letting Danny dominate their kissing because what Danny needed was control and stability and Martin seemed to know that without being told.

When oxygen became an issue, Danny pulled away slightly his lips still on Martin’s and he could hear Martin’s shallow pants for air. He could see that Martin’s eyes were tightly closed and he had a look of pure joy on his face.

“Does this go any further?” Danny whispered against Martin’s lips.

“I want it to and I know it’s a bad idea because of work and…”

“Shhh, don’t think about work. That’s all on the outside.” Danny said. Martin opened his eyes and let an amused look cross his face.

“We living in a bubble or something Danny?”

“Might as well be. I don’t want to think about everything that might happen because right now… right now I need this.”

“Danny, it’s there. It’s always going to be there. Whether this last tonight or a lifetime… it’s not an easy road ahead of us.”

“I’ve come this far right. This is something I want Martin. Something I…”

“Need?”

“Yeah. I said that already. I’m putting all my eggs into one basket here. Please don’t crush them.” Danny said really not caring if he sounded desperate now.

“Well crushed eggs do make a mess.” Martin said in what he had hoped would be a light tone, but Danny could hear the crack.

He grabbed hold of Martin and started kissing him again loving how responsive Martin was to Danny’s touches. He’d moan into their kiss and shiver when Danny touched him at certain places. Martin had tugged on Danny’s shirt and Danny stopped kissing him for a second though it took all the willpower he had left to do so.

“Maybe we should take this… in there.” Martin said motioning to his bedroom.

“Yeah, you’re right. We should.” Danny said standing up and pulling Martin with him.

They started to kiss again. This time hands roaming to take of shirts and other articles of clothing. Danny was still fully clothed and Martin was having a hard time taking off all the layers of the clothing. When they reached the bed Martin was shirtless and Danny, who had managed to lose his shoes, jacket, and tie, stared at him as though he was the only thing Danny could ever look at again.

“Some how this doesn’t seem right. You all the way over there practically all the way dressed and me lying on a bed almost naked.” Martin commented offhandedly.

Danny smiled at him as he began to take of his shirt and Martin watched as Danny put on a private show for him making it a point to do things slow and seductively. Martin was just about undone by the unexpected show, but he didn’t know why. Danny could make falling on your ass look graceful and seductive.

“Hurry up and get over here will you.” Martin said impatiently.

“We’re gonna do this right Martin or we aren’t doing it at all okay.” Danny said. Martin nodded his head.

This was for Danny after all and if Martin just about died from pleasure well that was just an added bonus for his part. He watched as Danny pulled off his pants and boxers and gulped at the sight of Danny naked in front of him. Weird thoughts of reverence mixed in his head with longing and needing and wanting until it was all just a blur and all he could really know was that Danny was gorgeous.

Martin watched as Danny graceful glided over to the bed and crawled on top of Martin who was lying in the middle of the bed with his eyes closed and his breath coming sharp pants.

“Open your eyes.” Danny whispered.

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m afraid if I open them you won’t really be here and this’ll all be some crazy dream I dreamed up because I was so worried about you.” Martin replied.

“You were worried about me?” Danny said into Martin’s ear the warmth breath causing Martin to shiver.

“Yeah I thought we were friends you know. Friends worry about each other.”

“We’re about to become something a little more than friends Fitzie.” Danny said amazed that he can be light in a situation like this.

“Not if you don’t hurry up.”

“You’re being oh so impatient tonight Martin.”

“I’m just afraid I might fall asleep on you.”

“Trust me, Martin, you’re not going to fall asleep on me.” Danny said and Martin moaned at the husky tone in which the words were said.

He was willing to surrender to Danny because really it was what he had wanted for quite some times now. Ever since he had looked up at Danny during the Eve Cleary case. He had seen that look in Danny’s eyes and he wondered just how far that look would take him.

Now he was here in his bed moaning and calling out curses and Danny’s name and it’s all intermingling and making Martin’s brain turn into goo because Danny’s goo with his hands and his mouth and his tongue. He’s placing small kisses everywhere and he really wants to take things slow.

He’s exploring every inch of Martin’s skin and kissing with such reverence and passion that it surprised Martin just a tiny bit because despite all his issues Danny is a great person. A terrific person that anyone would be lucky to have and Martin can’t quite wrap his brain around the fact that he’s the lucky one… even if it’s only for tonight.

Danny isn’t quite sure what he’s doing. Not really. He gets the basics of it. Being with Martin isn’t that different then what he’s used to. He’s eager to learn as much as he can so that Martin can make those delicious sounds that he makes every once in awhile. Danny was new to this whole thing.

The only guy he’s ever wanted this badly was Martin and he really can’t see it being anyone else. He really can’t see beyond Martin at this point. Martin’s moans when he licks a certain area, Martin’s gasp of air when he decides to nip a bit, Martin’s groans as his fingers trace light patterns on Martin’s skin and wrap around Martin’s cock.

Martin saying Danny’s name as Danny strokes him light thinking about how he does this for himself as well as concentrating on hearing Martin’s words of approval to see if he’s actually doing it right.

“Danny, please… I’m gonna… please move faster.” Martin said his eyes wide open, but Danny wasn’t quite sure he was actually seeing anything because they were glazed over.

Danny’s hand began to move faster at Martin’s insistence stroking in sure fast strokes thumb teasing the head. Danny was so hard just by listening to Martin’s cries. He wanted nothing more than to just bury himself inside Martin for the rest of his life. Screw everything else because right now Danny felt alive and things made sense.

“Danny, I…”

“What Martin?” Danny said his hand still stroking Martin’s cock. It was hard for Martin to concentrate.

“I… oh god… um… aren’t we… gonna… you know.”

“I… I’ve never really… not with a guy before.” Danny said.

“Oh, well… um… I didn’t know. I just thought… well it’s no big deal if you don’t want to…”

“No that’s the thing… I want. I wan to so badly it hurts.” Danny said taking Martin’s hand and placing it on his own very hard cock.

“Oh, um… right well, just… just wait a second.” Martin said as he pushed Danny away for a second.

“Lie down.” Martin said quietly.

Danny obeyed though he wasn’t quite sure what he was agreeing to as he did it. Martin had a tube of lube in on of his hands and a condom in the other. He opened the cap and Danny watched as Martin squeezed some of the liquid onto his fingers a look of total concentration on his face. Danny wondered what he was going to do, but he did not expect Martin to stick one finger into himself and he certainly didn’t expect to be so turned on by that one simple act that he almost came immediately.

Martin’s features were tight and Danny wondered if it hurt, but Martin seemed to like it. He seemed to keep pushing his finger deeper his eyes still closed as he bit on his lower lip. Then Martin was moaning and Danny wanted to know why. He really wanted to know why, but he didn’t get a chance to ask because Martin had taken out the first finger and replaced it with two slick coated fingers.

Danny was helpless. Danny could only watch as Martin did whatever it was that was making him mewl and moan and groan like that. All to soon Martin had taken his finger out and the look of determination back on his face he unwrapped the condom and rolled it over Danny’s cock. Danny bit his lip to keeping from coming at the feel of Martin’s warm hand on his cock. Martin made quick work of adding lube on Danny’s cock before straddling Danny’s waist.

“You ready?” Martin asked and all Danny could do was nod mutely as Martin sank down on his cock.

It was like nothing he ever felt before. It was tight and hot and it was Martin. He was here with Martin something he had given up on before he had even stared wanting it because it seemed so impossible, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t because Martin was here with him.

Danny felt as Martin began to move his hips rocking back and forth creating little friction between them and Danny wondered if Martin knew how sexy he looked impaled on Danny cock and riding him like he knew exactly what he was doing and what he wanted. This was a Martin he could climb on board with any day.

Danny’s hands grabbed Martin’s hips and rocked them faster needing more friction because it was just about killing him. Martin moaned and Danny took it as a sign of approval, but as much as he liked Martin in control and it was a sight to behold, Danny felt he needed to be in control. Just this once and he’d surrender himself to Martin because it wasn’t like he hadn’t already. So, in a move that had worked with woman, Danny flipped them over so that Martin was beneath him and Danny could thrust into him better.

“Christ, Danny.” Martin whispered as he felt Danny thrust into him harder.

“God, nothing… nothing has ever felt this good.” Danny whispered into Martin’s ear.

“Yeah.” Martin replied somewhat breathy. Danny’s hand had found its way back to Martin’s cock and he began to stroke in time with his thrusting. Martin cried out again Danny’s name falling from his lips yet again.

“Danny I’m… oh so close, right there Danny. Oh it feels so good.” Martin was murmuring and all Danny could do was thrust into him over and over again until he felt white flashes behind his eyes and he wasn’t even really aware of Martin coming and the shouts that Martin was shouting because he was lost himself.

Lost in the feel of Martin surrounding him so perfectly. Lost in the moment. And Danny knew he was screaming Martin’s name and a bunch of other words that could have been in Spanish, but Danny wasn’t really sure and he didn’t care because the pleasure was too great and he just needed this release that he was getting. Even if he didn’t deserve it.

It took a few moments to come down. Danny wasn’t sure but he thought he might have blacked out for a minute or two. Martin had a look of pure ecstasy on his face a smile on his lips. Danny leaned down to kiss him softly before pulling out shuddering at how cold it was without being inside Martin and he threw away the used condom.

He pulled Martin close his chest plastered against Martin’s back and wrapped his arms around Martin’s midsection. He could care less that Martin’s stomach was sticky from cum and sweat. At that moment he just needed to be close to Martin. To feel Martin.

“Wow.” Martin whispered.

“Yeah wow.” Danny whispered back his voice filled with the same reverent tone as Martin’s.

“I don’t think I can move.” Martin said.

“So don’t.” Danny said as he began t lick and kiss and nibble the juncture where Martin’s shoulder and neck met.

“Hmmm… I should, at least to get a wash cloth to clean myself up.” Martin said trying to protest but yawning as he did so.

“We can do that later.”

“It’ll dry later.”

“Do you really want to get up?” Danny asked seriously. Martin tried to move, but only succeeded in falling back down again.

“No, I guess not. I just don’t want to wake up with dried cum all over my stomach.” Martin said and Danny didn’t even have to face him to know that his nose was crinkled up in distaste.

“Well, if we hadn’t just had mind blowing sex maybe you could move.”

“Yeah, okay I’ll blame you in the morning.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.” Danny said teasingly.

“Hate to be ruin the moment guy, but… where is this going. Because this could be a one night thing…”

“Martin, shut up and sleep.”

“You gonna be here when I wake up in the morning?”

“Are the Mets the best baseball team in the world?”

“To you maybe but that still doesn’t answer my question.”

“Don’t worry about it Martin. I don’t want to leave the bubble any time soon.” Danny said. This seemed to satisfy Martin because he was soon back to sleep.

Which left Danny time to think. Time to think about what got him here. Time to think about why he needed Martin so much that he would risk his job so easily. The need was still there although slightly muted it was still coursing through his veins.

The need to be close to someone and that someone just happened to be Martin. Danny wasn’t build to his feelings. He knew that had been there for quite some time though he wasn’t sure what to make of them and if he wasn’t mistaken Martin had the same feelings. People didn’t just let you have sex with them if they didn’t at least like you a bit.

Danny had walked around with the weight of his problems on his shoulders and ever though most of his demons were as of yet unconquered Martin had helped him forget about some of them. That was really all Danny could hope for. He knew he still needed to work out his issues by himself because they were his and his alone, but it was nice to have someone to help him through it. People gave up everything, gave up themselves, just to feel that feeling once.

And it didn’t matter that they could get into huge trouble for this, because Martin as snuggled in Danny’s arms sleeping soundly. Perfectly trusting that Danny would be there come morning and Danny had every intention of staying until morning when he’d have to make a made dash to his apartment for clothes. He liked this little bubble they had and he wished he could stay in it.

The outside world was scary and harsh and Danny sometimes had had enough of it. This bubble was completely safe from everything that the outside world had. Danny knew that this bubble would always be here for him when the pain and weight of the outside world got to be too much.

It was the best alternative Danny could think of.

FIN

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