Nick checked out his wrist on his way out the door. It was completely bruised. For days he had been popping the rubber band against his skin. Luckily, the thoughts of hurting himself had slowed. He hoped that pretty soon they would stop all together. He was lucky, he had never actually become addicted to hurting himself, so it would be easier to stop. He only had thoughts of doing it.

Nick walked through the hallway and realized he had somehow managed to get lost. One minute his body guard was next to him, the next he was gone. Nick swallowed and looked around, feeling as if someone was watching him.

Nick found a door to outside the hotel and walked out. It was almost pitch black. He spotted his bus not too far away and decided to go ahead and walk to it. Nick jumped as he heard a noise. He stood still and looked around intently, trying to see if anyone or anything was there to harm him. Scared, Nick jogged to the bus.

Nick looked underneath the bus and walked around making sure no one was to be found anywhere near it. Nick started to walk to the door when he felt someone behind him. "No please!" Nick yelped when someone turned him around. "Nick, it's just me. I've been looking allover for ya man. Where ya been?" Nick realized he could breathe and walked onto the bus his eyes wide, not answering his body guard.

Nick walked through the bus checking every corner, every bed, every little space anyone could possibly be hiding in. Finally satisfied, he sat down on the couch in the back and turned the tv on.

"Hey Nick, I got some food to munch on till we get to the next town." Brian said walking in and sitting down next to him. "Ofcourse it's Mcdonald's, can you believe it was the only place NOT busy?" Brian laughed.

Nick smiled and looked in the bag,"What did you get?"

Brian pulled all the contents out of the bag,"Just some burgers and fries. Oh and ofcourse, the cookies they have that you always want.

Nick grinned and grabbed them, "Thanks." Brian handed him his drink,"Also I got you a milkshake, extra spit."

Nick made a face and Brian laughed looking at him,"You know no one spit in your drink, well atleast I know I didn't but McDonald's shouldn't have either."

Nick stared at his drink while Brian began to eat. It's not like it isn't possible. People probably spit and put all kinds of things in people's drinks all the time. What if the guy who made my shake was mad and decided to spit in it, or put something in it?

Nick felt his stomach tighten and put his milkshake down. He felt as if he were going to be sick.

"Hey Nick, I kinda wanna talk to you. I thought maybe this would be a good time. Since you know, there's no where we can go. Stuck on a bus all night and all." Brian said looking at Nick.

Nick sighed, he wasn't in the mood for this. "Yeah?"

Brian sat back,"Well it's about me and Leigh. I just-" Nick interrupted him,"Look Brian, I'm REALLY not in the mood for this right now ok? I don't feel like dealing with your problems. I have enough of my own to deal with ok? Do you know that you're the third person today that has come to me with some stupid ass problem? What about me? I have problems too. AND maybe they are bigger than yours ok?!"

Before Brian could reply, Nick walked out of the room slamming the door behind him.

Nick climbed into the fartherest top bunk he could find and closed the little curtain. Biting his lip he closed his eyes, breathing, trying to calm himself down. Why do I keep feeling like this? Why don't I want to listen to anyone? I've always listened to everyone's problems. I've always helped anyway I could. I've gone without sleep to help my friends. Why now? Why don't I care? I want to...but I can't. It feels like I just don't have it in me to care. I'm really trying, but everytime someone comes to me I just get pissed. I don't want to deal with it for some reason. Why? Why can't I care?"

Nick bit his lip harder to stop the tears that wanted to start. Why?