...Pittsburgh sucks... but you knew that already, but heres why!
Now Playing: Stone Temple Piolets - Andy Worhol (Bowie Cover)
Topic: Chat Stupidity
Ups and Downs of Pittsburgh and Western PA:

Chris: why dont bands like us? Is it cause pittsburgh sucks?
Ben: pittsburgh is filled with a bunch of hicks
Chris: ...is that a yes?
Ben: why which bands dont like us
Ben: and yes it is
Ben: only good things about pittsburgh is the clarks and the steelers
Chris: exactly
Ben: and umm
Ben: uhh
Ben: umm
Ben: wdve
Chris: ...well probably not, i mean i'm sure other states have similar stations to wdve
Ben: oh and
Ben: no
Ben: umm
Ben: thats all i got
Ben: did i say the steelers and the clarks
Chris: ...i mean bands have come out of pittsburgh
Chris: but they movied
Ben: like who
Chris: Like Nine inch nails
Ben: all i know is the clarks and donny iris
Ben: oh nin is from here
Chris: yeah
Ben: oh
Ben: oh
Ben: oh
Ben: i know something else about pittsburgh
Ben: wait no
Ben: thats pennslvania
Ben: the dead movies
Ben: and deer hunter
Chris: I forget if Bloodhound Gang is from pittsburgh or or phillidelphia
Ben: probable phli
Chris: the dead movies are close enough to be pittsburgh
Ben: yea
Chris: so thats what 5 things?
Ben: theres another good movie that was filmed here
Ben: i think black sheep
Chris: ...whoo, we got 6 things
Chris: .....thats not that great is it?
Ben: wait
Ben: dogma
Ben: thats it
Ben: not black sheep
Chris: we got bob OConnar!
Ben: oh and sudden death
Ben: i like that movie
Chris: ...yeah, we're fucked, huh?
Ben: and silence of the lambs
Ben: and kingpin
Chris: ...why is it the horror movies and the ones that involve hell and death?
Ben: and robocop
Chris: ..and the band that hated everyone and everything?
Ben: pittsburgh sucks
Chris: ...yeah
Chris: ...robocop sucks
Ben: hey
Ben: i liked the first one
Ben: and the third one
Chris: ...pittsburghese is kinda fun though
Ben: i think
Chris: ...yinz
Ben: yea
Ben: and you cant take a turn on the streets with out seeing a bar
Ben: i think thats us
Ben: im not sure
Ben: i dont go down to pittsburgh
Ben: i hate it there
Chris: well yeah
Chris: you have to drink alot to live there
Chris: another reasion it sucks
Chris: that hell hole spawned the evil being that is Christina Agulara
Ben: wait
Ben: we have alot of closed steel mills
Chris: ..hows that good?
Ben: thinks to throw rocks at
Chris: we have ted danson
Ben: big ben lives here
Chris: /...wait... no i was thinking of charles manson
Chris: who the fuck is ted danson
Ben: hes up for perol next year
Chris: Charles manson? Or ted danson?
Ben: charles manson
Chris: so whos ted danson?
Ben: WIKIPIDI
Chris: we have iron city beer
Ben: hes the guy from becker
Chris: ...is that good? i dont drink
Chris: ew, not becker
Ben: and three men and a baby
Ben: you know the movie you can see a ghost in
Chris: ...that movie still sucks
Ben: and he cheated on his first wife with whoopi goldberg
Ben: man
Chris: ..wow
Chris: low standards
Ben: his first wife was really really ugly then
Chris: whaddabout iron city beer?
Ben: its alright
Ben: haha
Chris: ...we have the clark bar
Chris: I like the clark bar
Ben: you know how everyone says that theres the dead kid in three men and a baby
Chris: yeah?
Ben: its a cardboard cutout of ted danson they forgot to get off stage
Chris: that... or it's charles manson
Chris: ...or sunglare
Chris: ..oh wait
Chris: it seriously IS ted danson
Chris: holy hit
Chris: *shit
Chris: i thought it was a joke
Ben: no they said it was a cardboard cut out of ted danson they forgot to get off stage
Chris: i just read that
Chris: holy fuck
Ben: I KNEW IT
Ben: you know the hanging man in wizard of oz
Ben: no one believed me
Ben: but it is a bird
Chris: I heard that
Ben: people are like no its a stage hand
Ben: or no its a man hanging himself
Ben: and im like no you can clearly tell its a fucking bird
Chris: or no it's ted danson killing himself
Ben: and i must do this
Ben: we need the wizard of oz
Ben: and a dark side of the moon cd
Chris: i heard about that
Ben: i know where to start it now
Ben: you start the cd at the end of the third roar from the mgm lion
Chris: it's ok ben, i'll oput this on the site and reveal your smartyfullness to the world
Ben: wikipedia says it works
Ben: ok
Chris: i know how it works
Chris: i heard it before
Chris: mwahaha
Chris: that guy couldn't ply tinman cause he was allergic
Chris: to the silver paint
Ben: hey you remember sissy right
Ben: dident she look like toto
Chris: kinda
Ben: oh
Ben: and the original toto was a dachshund
Ben: but they changed it to a british terrier becouse a dachshund is some how controversial
Chris: ...when did they change it?
Chris: i kow ted danson is involved
Chris: I WILL GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS!
Chris: hey pittsburgh has andy warhol
Chris: ...he painted soup
Chris: pretty soup
Chris: i envy him... he painted random stuff stupid colors using no major amount of skill, and got an entire generation to buy in
Chris: ...just like pop music
Chris: hey did you know we got a basketball team last year?
Chris: oh and you were right, we do have a soccar team called the riverhounds
Chris: i just never payed attention
Chris: ...or cared
Ben: i knew about the riverhounds
Ben: but we have a basketball team?
Ben: whats it called
Chris: as of last year
Ben: the pittsburgh crackers
Chris: no
Chris: the pittsburgh
Chris: wait
Chris: wait
Chris: WAIT FOR IT
Chris: XPLOSION!!!!
Chris: ... i couldn't make that up if i tried
Chris: no E, crocker will hate it
Chris: we also have a womans football team
Ben: i knew that one
Ben: i cant remember the name though
Chris: pittsburgh passion
Ben: and all the woman football players are dykes
Ben: why cant they just have hot chicks run around
Ben: more people will watch
Chris: we're the only state dumb enough to call a building
Chris: The Cathedral of Learnng
Chris: *learning
Ben: but wait
Ben: pittsburgh people are dumb
Chris: true
Ben: pink floyd says that they dident mean to make it sync with the wizard of oz
Chris: ...we have kennywood
Chris: ...and kennywood has the phantom's revenge
Chris: which is tied for the 6th fastest rollercoaster in the world
Chris: and idlewild which... sucks
Chris: ...and sandcatle wich.... sucks as well
Chris: ...and hershey's... which is.... avaiable everywhere so who cares
Ben: theres ceder park
Ben: which has one of the highest roller costers
Chris: ...we have... uhm.... a.. uh... zoo?
Chris: ...whee?
Chris: ..and the PPG aquarium
Chris: ....which.. if your out of state, you dont know what pittsburgh post gazzette is
Chris: and... that makes PPG sound really weird
Chris: 'least thats what i think they mean by PPG
Chris: maybe not, i dont give a fuck
Ben: hooray

Rap Kills
Now Playing: Hunger Strike - Temple Of The Dog
Proof that rap is no good!
I could tell you The Story Of The Dumbass and the Gun, but I'm lazy. I'm not here to tell you every story I hear about! Do it yourself for once you lazy shit.

Click It Damnit

and now-
SITES THAT AGREE WITH ME!
Rap Sucks
...Unlike this person
See, it sucks

Point Made.

Random Follow Up To Yesterdays Buffet Comment: Chat Stlye... Die
Now Playing: Shallow Be Thy Game ~ Red Hot Chili Peppers
Topic: Chat Stupidity
Chris: i'm sad
Chris: i wanted to see buffet snap and go on a rampage
Ben: but then ben wouldent of seen the boobies
Chris: ....i dont care, i wanted a buffet rampge!!
Chris: i was hoping somone would thow someething at him
Chris: and he would just go fucking psycho
Chris: and pull out a gun
Chris: and kill everyone
Chris: cause it would be funny and ironic
Chris: you wouldn't expect that from jimmy buffet
Chris: it would shock the world
Ben: yes it would
Chris: except Africa
Ben: who cares about them
Chris: In africa it would be
Chris: DUDE, JIMMY BUFFET SNAPPED!!
Chris: African: Click click click clack click (Trackslation: who the fuck is that?!)
Chris: *translation
Chris: brb
Ben: african: click click click click
(translation: GIMME FOOD OR SHOOT ME)
Ben: chris would like this cover of mr crowley
Chris: back
Chris: whos it by?
Ben: priest
Chris: Jimmy Psychopants Buffeyt?
Ben: no
Ben: priest
Ben: judas
Ben: priest
Chris: i know which priest it is!
Ben: NO YOU DONT
Chris: JUSDAS PSYCHOPANTAS PREIST
Ben: I COULD BE TALKING ABOUT THE PRIEST WHO TOUCHED YOU
Chris: *PRIEST
Ben: or was that prince
Chris: HE DIED IN THE CAR CRASH THAT I DEFINATLY DIDN'T SET UP
Chris: ....yeah... we dont talk about that
Chris: ....people might get curious about his car exploding at the red ligth again
Chris: *hides detonator*
Ben: wow 177 things of adware
Chris: good
Ben: 201
Chris: even gooder
Ben: the search is still going
Chris: i hope one is the psycho buffet virus
Chris: and it kills you
Chris: i really hope buffet snaps someday
Chris: just cause it would make me laugh
Ben: 221
Ben: 232
Ben: 252
Ben: 263
Chris: damn, jimmy buffet really doesn't like your computer
Ben: 266
Ben: no he doesnt
Ben: 267
Chris: it'd because you flashed him
Chris: *its
Ben: i dident though
Ben: 269
Ben: 270
Chris: ...yeah
Chris: he WOULD have snapped
Ben: not this time atleast
Ben: 271
Chris: bens computer was attacked by the buffet gods ofe hate
Ben: 271 things of adware
Ben: i guess thats gods way of telling me not to watch so much porn
Ben: but guess what
Ben: IM NOT GOING TO STOP
Chris: ...yeah you are
Chris: when buffet kills you
Chris: with his rock
Chris: of doom
Chris: ...doomy death of doom
Chris: ...killy

Damn. People are stupid.
Now Playing: Pumpkin Head - Misfits
Topic: Cunt Of The Week
Wow. Just wow. For the past 3 days people in and around Pittsburgh have been overdosing on bad Herion. 22 people last time i checked. Uhm... i got a plan: Stop shooting up! Crazy plan, huh? But you'll stop eating chicken when theres a disease OVERSEAS?! Good logic. I understand you're addicted, but thats a lame excuse in the first place.
Another thing. Yes. It's 6-6-06. Whoo. Funny huh? Were all gonna die LOL~!!! SHUT UP!!!
I'm aware that today is June 6th 2006. It's not FUNNY! I'LL BEAT YOU ALL WITH A WOODEN POLE!
6606, see that, see the 0, that makes it NOT 666, MAKING YOUR JOKE LAME, STUPID AND UNFUNNY. Worst thing that can happen is When Jimmy Buffet Comes to Pittsburgh today he snaps and kills everyone in the town. And I'm praying for that. Because between that and the herion, that should take out all the retards downtown. That just leaves the retards out here. And they'll probably do herion to celebrate 6-6-06.

So maybe we all will die after all.

Oh well.

You Cunts Are Pissing Me Off
Now Playing: Buckethead Feat. Les Claypool And Brain (Primus) - Ballad Of Buckethead
Topic: Cunt Of The Week
You know whats sad? Cunt of the Week was just a name. It was never supposed to be a weekly thing. You mother fuckers piss me off that damn much.
So anyway, this weks Cunt is COCA-COLA!!!!!
Dont get me wrong. I love coke and their products. But they took the 2nd greatest fucking soda EVER off the shelves.
Vanilla Coke.
Why?
CAUSE SALES WERE DOWN! YOU FUCKERS ARE TO BLAME! FUCK YOU ALL!
Vanilla Coke fucking rocked, i know people who will back me on that.
So fuck you all for not buying it, cause i did, you can all die.

R.I.P. Vanilla Coke
2002-2005

You Cunts Are Pissing Me Off
Now Playing: Buckethead Feat. Les Claypool And Brain (Primus) - Ballad Of Buckethead
Topic: Cunt Of The Week
You know whats sad? Cunt of the week was just a name. I Didn't expect this to be a weekly thing. You all piss me off that often.
So what am i pissed about now? Well, don't get me wrong, cause I love Coke; The company, the products, all good. but THEY'RE FUCKING CUNTS!!!!!!!!!
Those dicks took away my beloved Vanilla Coke. And I know people (coughMattcough) who will back me on that. The took away one of the finest Coke products. They also took away Diet Vailla Coke and Diet Coke With lemon. But fuck them.
And you know what. This is your fault. SALES WERE DOWN YOU ASSHOLES. I WAS BUYIN' YOU WERN'T SO YOU CAN JUST DIE, THAT WAS MY 2ND FAVORITE DRINK YOU ASS-WHORES! Now they have that Black Cherry Vanilla. it's OK. BUT IT'S NOT THE SAME, SO FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!!!, I'LL BURN YOU ALL!!
I'm ok now!
So anyway, uh... yeah. I'm sane again. Not really.
I miss you Vainilla Coke.

R.I.P. Vanilla Coke
2002-2005

Cunts, Cunts EVERYWHERE!!!
Now Playing: Weird Al - Angry White Boy Polka
Topic: Cunt Of The Week
This time:
Schools...

So some kids were throwing pennes in a local school. A penny hit a teacher, and one of the kids went up to her and basically said that he didn't know if it was his but he was sorry.
He was supended.

Some 5th graders mixed some Kool Aid mix with some sugar. They brought to school and ate it at school
They called it "Happy Crack."
Suspended.

Some kid brought a squirt gun to school.
Expelled.

Another kid brought in a paintball gun into school for a project.
Expelled.

ANOTHER kid brought one in for after school use.
Suspended.

A little overboard. Probably.

In other cunt related news:

The animated movie Over The Hedge based off of a comic by the same name has banned by the pricks in China because of it's "deception of free world". Dont get me wrong, it SHOULD be banned, but not for that. It should be banned cause Avril Lavigne is in it.

Speaking of movies

To all the people pissed off about the Da Vinci Code:
It's a movie. It's fiction. If the people want to fuck with history like that, let them go for it. And then, dont go see it. Dont read the book. See, theres something you all need to know:
Just cause you dont like something doesn't mean you need to take a stand. Sit down, and shit you're annoying ass up.

Cunt Of The Week Volume 2.0 and Other Stupid Shit
Now Playing: Black Sabbath - Paranoid
Topic: Cunt Of The Week
So apperantly some bitch who is fined constantly for drunk driving(.. like constantly.. weekly)was arrested last week sometime and she's sad because she is going to miss her kids bithday. WELL THEN DONT DRINK AND DRIVE! (And by that I mean Drink and drive but dont get caught.) And she's all "OOH, I"M THE VIVTOM HERE, I CANT GET MY KID A CHRISTMAS PRESENT CAUSE I HAVE A YEAR IN PRISON." Shut your whiney ass up. You're missing it vcause you're a drunkfuck. you probably had your kid because you're a drunkfuck in the first part. So fuck off and die.

Another thing. Some kid was kicked out of school for having a squirt gun. Yup. Thats stupid as hell. I dont see the big deal about fake weapons. They're plastic and non-lethal, so go fuck a goat you whiney prick school board whores. And just cause I can, I blame parent groups too. School boards just hate fun I guess. Why must we hate everything. Why cant we all get along...

and then focus out hate hate just the stuff that needs hated...

Parent groups, hippies, rap music, communist bastards, Illegal aliens, Micheal Jackson, Rugrats The Movie, and Kiss Unplugged in New York.

Then once those things are destroyed we go back to hating eachother.

Now It Time For: CUNT OF THE WEEK
Now Playing: Misfits - American Psycho
Topic: Cunt Of The Week
With the number of dumbasses in the world, I think it’s safe to assume the apocalypse will soon be upon us. That’s my theory. Proof?
So some crazy fucking psycho bitch is suing Kellogg’s and Nickelodeon for… guess… I you said making sweet and sugary foods look fun, you’re a fucking winner.
She’s suing Kellogg’s for making sugary cereals like say.. Trix, look fun. Having cartoon characters and making the kids look like they’re having a good time. So basically she’s a health nut psycho bitch. Well guess what you cunt, I have more fun eating Trix then you’re pussy fucking wheat square bullshit. Go shove something up your ass and stop suing my food organizations.
And that’s not all folks, she’s suing Nickelodeon for SHOWING THE COMMERCIALS DURING CHILDRENS PROGRAMMING. WHAT THE FUCK?! They HAVE to because they get MONEY from showing commercials, and when are they GOING to show it? Nick at Nite when all the old people put on nick so they reminisce to all their 80’s shows? I don’t think they’ll be buying any Fruit Loops.
Then she wants to sue any company that puts famous cartoon characters on the boxes. So lets say Fruit Loops puts Spongebob Squarepants on their box. Lawsuit. And she wants to sue Fruity Pebbles for having Fred Flintstone for a mascot! Can you believe this bitch?
And do you know the main reason for her suit?
Because when she taker her kid shopping she wants to buy the cereals. WHAT THE FUCK, THE WORLD HAS TO CHANGE BECAUSE YOU’RE A CUNT AND YOUR KID WANTS UNHEALTHY CEREAL! SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP! YOU MAKE ME SICK! You REALLY think that’s worth a lawsuit? Burn in hell you slutbag! Don’t take the bitch shopping then. I mean just refuse to buy it, are you that dumb, you say “No” and walk away. Goddamn. Fucking bitch.

Consparicy Theory-off
Now Playing: Motorhead - Ace Of Spades
Topic: Chat Stupidity
One more updayte tonight... cause i'm Bored.
The following situation happened after i showed ben the Air Killed Kennedy thing from the last entry... then told him to beat it. I call it: The Conspiracy Game!
"Jeff (big Kid with an afro from our school) took a nap and he colored his hair green because he actually wasn’t napping he was passed out from St. Paddy’s day and then a mongoose was on the grassy knoll. But the grounds keeper shot it, then he miss took JFK for a mongoose and he shot at him. But missed and hit the 7up plus bottle who them went and killed JFK"
~Ben
"I think Bob ross killed Kennedy. Except Kennedy wasnt dead. Bob ross just threw red paint at him to make him pretty, and everything got out of hand ..Kennedy was napping He died at the hospital because they shocked him with too many volts and his heart exploded"
~Chris
"The homeless people organized to take out the old people, but then the old people allied themselves with the midgets, but the homeless people got the feminists, but then JFK was all like “hey lets all kill the feminists.” So they did. And then the frogs got angry at the Mexicans, but the Mexicans were to busy eating tacos, and they threw a taco at JFK and JFK got taco sauce on him, and the bulls got free and they chased JFK down the street. And then in the attempt to stop the bulls Rosie O’Donnell tried to eat them but Tom Selic shot at her because he hates her, but who doesn’t, but he missed and hit Chris Farley and Chris Farley fell on JFK and crushed him to death."
~Ben
"Oswald was a Government agent and he was shooting at the guy on the knoll which was actually Ted Kennedy Because he kills girlfriends. And Oswald shot at Ted. But he was a little fucked up, see he had a little drinky drinky beforehand, and he hit Kennedy. Then Ted shot John. Enter Rob Schneider.
Rob, being as hated as he is, wanted to finally fit in and be loved. So he decided to be in the group of shooters."
~Chris
"Wait, I got it, everyone in America was trying to shoot Rob, because he was going to act again, and they all missed and hit JFK."
~Ben
"LET ME FINISH!!
So he hid in a sewer where he met a satanic pigeon who said to him HEY STAR IN THE ANIMAL, IT'S A GOOD IDEA!
But the pigeon's plan failed, because the Animal didn't bring the apocalypse...close though. If only 15 more people had seen it in theatres…but anyways, then the pigeon gave him a gunand Rob shot Kennedy the third time.
Then Marilyn Monroe Possessed that mobster dude and killed Oswald for being a drunk dick."
~Chris
And it kind of died after that.