Ashley High : Chapter 3
The paramedics came to where we were, Ben leading the way. When he saw me, he ran over to my side and asked me if I was alright. I closed my eyes, hugged him and whispered, “I am now...”. He squeezed me tightly and then pulled away, “I was scared.” he whispered to me. I couldn’t believe that he was scared. Him- the one who scared the bears away, him- the one who kept his cool the whole time. I didn’t know what to say to him back so I gave him the understanding eyes, ya know, the ones that make anyone feel better. They carried Josh away on a gurny and Ben, Mandy, and I walked back to the car, cautiously looking over and behind ourselves, still spooked by the bears presence. We all practically ran to the car once we had it in sight. I jumped in the front and Mandy got in the back. He started the car faster than I could buckle my seatbelt. We drove down to the hospital, sat there for two hours until we actually were told something. “Are you his friends?” the doctor asked us. “Yes.” Ben answered. “Well, he has a busted jaw, and small blow to the head but other than that, he’s fine. He’s lucky, most people don’t walk out of attacks like that.” he told us. “Well, Ben scared them away, he’s the hero.” I told him, smiling proudly. Ben looked at me and smiled. The doctor walked away, smiling. “Ya know, I didn’t look at myself as the hero...I just did what any guy would do for his friends.” he said, honestly. “Well, your a hero to me.” I told him. “And to me.” Mandy said. We leaned on him and he put his arms around us.
I didn’t realize I fell asleep until I woke up, still next to him but Mandy was gone and outside was dark. I began to get up and I accidentally woke up Ben. He opened his eyes and looked just as surprised as I was. “Oh my goodness...we must have been tired.” he said. “Mmm hmm...” I mumbled. We got up, stretched and walked over to the clerk’s desk. “Do you know if Josh Parker is accepting visitors?” Ben asked. “Yes, room 43, just around the corner.” she told us. “Thank you.” he said then we walked away. Halfway to his room, he grabbed my hand and squeezed it. I knew he was nervous about what Josh looked like, because back in the woods, we could tell, he was beat around pretty bad. We walked in and the curtains were closed, which made the suspense even more unbearable. We walked around and his parents were there, holding his hand, smiling. When he turned and looked at us, he couldn’t speak, but we could tell he was glad to see us. His face was swelling up on one side and he had a black eye. Ben walked over, trying to be brave, then he broke down and cried. He kept telling Josh how sorry he was. I couldn’t take it. Being in that room reminded me too much of the day I woke up with my leg amputated and with Ben over there saying sorry, felt to deja vu.
I walked out of the room and leaned against the outside wall, breathing harder. It was like that day all over again, coming back to haunt me. Ben was in there for only alittle and then he came out. “Whats wrong?” he asked me. “I’m just getting, getting flashbacks of that day, I, umm...” I stumbled around, looking for words. “Ohh, ok. We can leave now. Do you wanna go home?” he asked. “Yes.” I told him, as he put his arm over me and walked with me out the door. I got in and just sat and cried. When he got in and saw me, he sat there, because he didn’t know what to say. He started the car and pulled away. When I saw my street, I noticed he purposely or not, just passed it. I looked over at him and noticed that he had a very upset look on his face. “Ben...?” I asked. “You can’t be alone tonight.” he told me. For a second I didn’t understand what he meant, then it hit me. “Do you mean...?!” I asked. “My sister is gone, you can stay in the room next to me. If you feel scared, you can wake me.” he told me, pulling in his driveway. “Oh, yeah...thats what I, thought...” I said. We got out and walked inside. “Mom? Dad?” he called. His mom walked to the doorway. “Hi Ben, did you hear about Josh, honey?” she asked. “Yeah, Mom...do you mind if Ash stays here for the night, in Laurels room?” he asks. “Why? Isn’t her mom home?” she asks. “Shes working a late shift tonite and Ash is kinda down today.” he told her. “Well,” she said eyeing us both,” I guess. Make sure you stay in that room!” she told us. “Mom!!” Ben said, embarrassed. We ran up the stairs and he led me to Laurels room. He walked over to her dresser and pulled out a flannel set of pajamas with the words ‘angel’ all over them. Then we sat down on the edge of the bed. I looked over and saw the door was halfway closed. I looked back over at Ben, who was looking at me. Then we started to kiss, then slowly make out, when I fell off the bed. I hit my head on her cd player and started laughing. He looked down at me and started as well. Before things would get out of hand, I got off the floor. “Well, I’m gonna get dressed now. Goodnight, Ben...” I told him. “Goodnight, angel...” he said, then before he walked away, grabbed me and kissed me. Why is he all of a sudden Mr.Kissy now? I thought. Instead of complaining about him always kissing me, I just smiled and led him out. I shut the door and got dressed. All of a sudden, I just felt like dancing around, because I could not sleep. What girl could??!! I could hear Ben in his room, listening to a cd, but I couldn’t tell what it was. I fell back on the bed and pulled the covers over me. I turned over to my side and closed my eyes. I had a dream that I was back at the hospital, but I could see the doctors cutting off my legs and everything was bloody. Then I see my brother, getting run over and over with a car, and Becky is driving. I wake up, screaming. Ben runs into my room, his parents following. “Ashley, whats wrong?!” he asked me. “I saw my brother getting run over, the doctors, they were cutting my legs...” I mumbled. He hugged me tightly, his parents were sympathetic. They went and got me something to drink and me and Ben stayed there together. He ran his fingers through my hair and caressed my face. The room was almost pitch black, besides the slice of light underneath the door. When his parents came back in, Ben pulled away. They handed me the drink and told Ben to go back to his room. “I really think I should stay.” he tells them. His parents looked at each other, worried. “We won’t do anything...” he assured them. “Well...fine. But we’ll be coming to check on you.” she told him. They smiled and went back to bed. He turned back to me. “I just wanted to say, besides what happened in the woods, this day has been ok.” he told me. “Why?” I asked. “Because I got to spend it with you...” he told me. I smiled. “Thank you. But, you know, you really must admit, you do look sexy when your serious.” I told him. He laughed, “No!!” he said. “Yes!!” I repeated. “Ok, ok, I give...” he exclaimed. “Have you noticed how Mandy’s been acting latly?” I asked. “Yea, what crawled up her crack?” Ben said. I started laughing. “Ya, today she called me some really rude names. Are her and Josh like, in a fight?” I asked. “You know what, Josh hasn’t been telling me much anymore...it’s high school, Ash. It’s pulling us all apart.” he said. It was quiet for a second. He was exactly right.
We stayed up and talked for hours more, over everything. When I woke up, he was sleeping next to me, but not under the covers. He looked really cold and I thought it was really sweet he stayed there with me the whole night, even if it meant he would have to freeze. His parents thought otherwise. “BENJERMIN!” his mom screamed, when she opened his bedroom door and saw he wasnt there. Ben woke up, startled and fell off the bed, making a big thud. I couldn’t help it when I started to laugh. His parents slammed the door open and looked down at him, on the floor. “You have alot to explain, mister!” she yelled, grabbing his hair and dragging him out of the room and into the hallway. I decided to get dressed and get out of there before it was my turn. Too late. His father came in and grabbed my wrist yanking me off the bed and down the stairs. “I’m calling your mother!” he shouted, “Whats your number??” he finished. “Theres no way I’m going to let you call my mom for something I didn’t do!” I shouted. “Don’t you get fresh with me girl! I’m an adult and I deserve respect!!” he hollered. “I only give respect to people who give me the same, anyway, I wasn’t getting fresh, I’m telling the truth.” I told him as calmly as possible. I felt very sorry for Ben at that moment. Now I know what he means when he says his parents are over-bearing and never understand him at all. “You know what, I’ll call my mom myself and tell her what a fool your acting like.” I told him. “Fine! Fine, you tell her that and while your at it, tell her that your never allowed to see my son ever again!!” he shouted. Then it hit me. Never see Ben again?? Who does this guy think he is, God? “Yeah and how are you gonna stop me??” I asked. “Send him away to his grandparents.” he said, sternly and honestly. I looked up at Ben, feeling horrible. I had just sealed his fate by being rude to his parents. Now I had some major butt-kissing to do.
“Mr. Harrington, I am extremely sorry for what you think I’ve done with your son, but with all honesty, nothing happened. We were talking and we got tired and fell asleep. It was completly honorable, I swear.” I told him. “Yes, and I swear if you ever come near my son again, I will have a court order against you.”he said, walking back to his wife. She looked down sympathetic, being the only one who believed me besides Ben and myself. I looked at her as if to say ‘Do something’ but she didn’t say a word. When she let go of Ben, he ran down the steps to me and then looked up at his parents, with a hurt expression on his face. Then he kissed me. His father looked as if he was going to explode, but his wife tried to calm him down. He steamed away, back to his room. Ben looked in desperation up at his mom, but she just walked away. “Come with me, Ben. You can come over to my house.” I whispered. “No, I gotta face them.” he told me. “You can do that when thier calmed down.” I said. “No, they’re not gonna get any better than this...Ashley, if I never see you again I want you to know I love you, with all of my heart. I’ve always loved you.” he tells me. “Don’t worry Ben, we’ll see each other again. They’re not getting rid of me that easily.” I told him, smiling. “That was pretty impressive, the way you talked to my dad. Have you looked into being a lawyer, ever?” he asks. I laugh. “I’ll look into it.” I say. He hugs me. When I think he’s done, he just pulls me closer. “Ben, are you sure you don’t want to come?” I ask. “Oh, please don’t ask me again. I don’t know how much longer I can keep saying no.” he says. I grab my coat and kiss him goodbye.
As I walk away down the driveway, I see him standing there in the window, his hands in his pockets and his head hanging as high as he could keep it, trying to stay brave. I blew him a kiss and turned back around. When I walked inside my house, my mom came stomping in the doorway and slapped me. “Where were you!?” she screamed. “I was staying at Mandy’s mom.” I told her. “No you weren’t! You think I didn’t check all your friends houses first! I thought you got in a car accident or you were lost again!! Do you know how much I panicked?” she shouted. “I-” I started. “Please tell me you weren’t with Ben...”she said, holding her head with her hand. “Ok, I won’t then...” I told her. “How could you, Ashley! I thought I taught to respect yourself alot more than that!!” she shouted. I went and sat down in a chair. “Nothing happened, Mom. I just needed to be with him last night. His parents thought it was ok!” I said. “Oh really? Well, I’ll just go an’ see, hmm?” she said and walked in the kitchen and started to dial their number. “Kathy? This is Carol. Did Ben come home last night? Oh he did. Well my daughter didn’t. Yes now I know, look, how could you let two 17 year old’s spend the night together, is your house some kind of haven for sex or something?! Oh she did, did she? See that I wasn’t told. Right. Could we all get together today, now? Ok. Thank you, Kathy. I’ll see you soon. Goodbye.” The conversation over the phone didn’t sound very good. Ben and me got ourselves in big trouble, over nothing.
As the week went past, rumors were flying all over school about Ben and me. Some made up by of my so-called friends. Mandy even started one. I could tell that Ben was getting really fed up with all the gossip because he wouldn’t even sit with anyone at lunch, and sometimes, not eat at all just to hide away from people. I almost thought about skipping school a few times myself. We were being called pretty offensive names. Life was getting unbearable for that whole week and because of Ben’s parents, I couldn’t call him to at least release some anger. The only thing that would listen was my diary but you can only converse so much with that. My last resort was to take control of the situation myself. The next day, after planning the night before, I approached Mandy in the hallway. “What do you think your doing?!” I shouted. She looked at me, smirked and turned her back, whispering some negative remark to her new friends. I stood there ticked off for maybe two seconds then grabbed her hair and flung her on the ground. She shouted a nasty word my way and I bent down and spit in her face. “Don’t you EVER mess with me again or you’ll be the sorriest person alive.” I hollered in her face. She got up, acting as if I didn’t hurt her and told me to go away, that ‘loose’ girls aren’t allowed near her. “Thats fine with me, because traitors aren’t allowed around me.” I told her and walked away. As I approached my room, the teacher came out, grabbed my ear, and dragged me to the principals office. Mandy tattled on me.
“Did you threaten Mandy Cedar?” the principal asked me. Her eyes were as cold as the ice outside and I knew that whatever punishment she was going to give me would be just as cold. Then the door flung open and Ben walked in, with a police officer restraining his hands behind his back. He threw him in a chair and left. He looked at me and we waved, smiling in a depressed and hopeless manner as if to say, “Got you too huh?” “Don’t tell me you know each other?” the principal asked. We nodded yes. “Great. What did you do sir?” she asked. I twisted in my seat, eager to hear his tragic tale. “I beat up some guys at lunch.” he told her. I was impressed as much as I should be. “And you?” she asked, turning to me. “I threw Mandy Cedar on the ground by her hair then spit on her.” I told her. “Well, you know I’m going to punish you...3 day suspension. Even that’s getting off easy. And you sir, 5 days. I’ll be calling both of your parents. We’ll start off with yours...” she says, handing me a piece of paper and a pen. I write it down and hand it back. Then she passes it to Ben and he writes his in. When she goes to pick up the phone, I feel like we weren’t getting treated very fairly and shouted, “Wait!! Aren’t you going to ask us why we did it?” I asked. “I really don’t think thats nessasary.” she told me. “I think it is!” I shouted. “Now you young lady, keep your tone down with me. I’m an adult and I expect respect.” she told me. That was it. I was completly sick and tired of this stereotype that just because they were adults they were in need of constant respect. Just because I wasn’t an adult meant to this world, I need no respect and this was the straw that broke the camels back. I jumped out of my seat and got in her face. “Why am I constantly being told this! You think I don’t know you need respect! Heck ya! You wanna know why! Because I’ve been being told this my whole freakin’ life! Well, I’m a human being too and I deserve the respect and dignity that I am entitled to!!” I shouted. She sat there for a second, looked down at her pen, picked it up and scribbled the three from the punishment and wrote five. “Are you finished?” she asked me. “I hope one day, when your sick and being fed canned food meant for babies, you’ll think back on this day and finally know how it feels to be less of a person, with no dignity and no respect. You remember this.” I told her then walked out of the room, with Ben sitting there in silence.
When my mom found out I got suspended, she went balistic on me, telling me that ‘she was tired of making excuses for me’ and that ‘she is embarrassed to call me her daughter sometimes’. I took the verbal bashing for maybe 2 hours then walked in my room, locked the door, grabbed my coat and snuck out the window. I really had nowhere to go, so I decided to go visit Josh at his house. When I approached the door, I heard someone unlock it. “Oh hey Ash.” Josh said. He let me in and asked me if I wanted something to eat. “Nah thanks... I just wanted to ask you something.” I told him. We walked to his living room and sat down. “So...whats been up at school? Anything interesting?” he asked me. I almost choked on my own spit. “Yeah...!” I said. He didn’t ask me ‘what’ so I continued. “Ben and me got suspended, isn’t that exciting?” I asked, sarcastically. “Oh man, how’d that happen?” he asked, seriously. “I beat up someone. And Ben, some people.” I told him. “Did you beat Mandy up, Ashley.” he asked, curious. “Yeah, I kinda did.” I told him. “I saw her today, she told me some, well, some not nice word went biserk on her. I really can’t stand her attitude latly, Ash. I don’t blame you. But why did she call you that?” he asked. “It’s a long story.” I told him. “I’m not exactly going anywhere. Do you wanna tell me?” he asks. I nod and tell him the whole thing, skipping a few parts but definatly telling him about the rumors. “Man, Ash. I’m really sorry. For both of you guys. I only wish I could do something.” he told me. “Yeah, well I better get going. I snuck out and I’m in enough trouble as is.” I told him, putting my coat back on. “Ok...well, I guess I’ll see you later then.” he told me. I waved, said goodbye and walked out the door. I really noticed Joshes attitude was nicer and a whole lot sweeter, but I also noticed a sort of sad tone in his voice but took no thought to it. I guess it really does take a near death experiance to change a person for the better.
When I snuck back in my room, I was so relieved my mom didn’t notice. “Huh! I bet I could do this again.”I whispered to myself. At that moment, my mom pounded on the door. I slowly shut the window, locked it and fixed the curtains, making any trace of my escape completly not unconspicuous. I hollered ‘one second!’ and then opened my door. “Yeah?” I asked. “Phone call.” she told me. “Thanks.” I said, grabbing the phone. I shut my door, but one small part of me thought my mom somehow knew. “Yello!!” I said. “Hey, Ash...” Ben said, one the other line. “Oh, hey hun, your parents have to be gone.” I told him. “Yea they are, actually. Hey, Josh just called me. How’d you get out the house?” he asked. “The window.” I told him, whispered. I heard him chuckle. “Hey, look, I just wanted to say you really impressed me today. It was incerdibly brave to stand up like that to the principal.” he told me. “Thanks...something just broke inside me. I can’t believe I even did that!” I exclaimed. “I was wondering since we’re both on suspension, we could sneak away during the day.” he asked. “Umm, well, doesn’t your mom stay home all day?” I asked. “She’s not the one opposed to us. Thats Sargeant Pain-in-the-butt.” he said. I laughed. “Hey thats a good one...but alittle unoringinal.” I told him. “Hey, my dad just pulled in the driveway, so I’ll see you tommorow. I’ll come over at noon.” he told me. “Sure, luv ya, Ben.” I replied. “Luv ya, angel.” he remarked. “Buh byes..” I said, then clicked off. I knew that if I didn’t click off first, the goodbyes would be endless.
Later that night, I was sitting in the living room watching tv when I heard my mom screaming at someone on the phone. Curious, I snuck a peek around the corner, picked up my phone and softly clicked it on. “Carol I can’t afford to waste my time talkin’ with you, no mo’!” a raspy voiced man hollered. “If you hang up this phone Bill you’ll never see your daughter again, you hear me!?” my mom shouted. Then the phone clicked off. My body froze. It was my dad she was talking to. I clicked the phone off and walked into the living room, continuing to watch tv. “Who was it, Mom?” I asked, as she walked in the room. “Cable company.” she lied. I nodded, angrily but said nothing else. My own father would give up any hope of seeing me again because ‘he had no time’. A sharp pain twisted through my viens and my eyes swelled up with anger. I shut off the tv, walked in my bedroom and sobbed silently on my bed for the rest of the night.
When I woke up the next morning, my eyes felt pryed shut by eye goop, dried on next to my eyelashes. When I opened them up, some of them ripped away, making a really stinging sensation. I moaned, rolled over and looked at my clock. “11:30? Oh...no...” I mumbled. I sat up, slumping over myself and standing up like a zombie risen from the dead. I picked up the phone and dialed Ben’s number, to tell him to come later. “Hi, is Ben there?” I asked. “Yea, it’s me.” he told me. “Hey.” I replied. “Did you just wake up or something?” he asked me. “Yeah, I’m gonna need alittle more time to get a shower and stuff.” I told him. “Alright. You can call me later then.” he said. “Yup...buh bye.” I told him. “See you, angel.” he said, then he hung up. I couldn’t get myself to get in the shower until 12:00 and then once I was in, I didn’t want to get out. I got to singing and dancing, with shampoo swirlies on my head and soap all over, that I didn’t realize I was in there for an hour. When I looked at my watch, I couldn’t believe it. I looked at my pruny fingers and toes and decided I should get out. It wasn’t everyday I got to take an hour long shower because of school. I got out, blow dried my hair, then put some make-up on. Still in a towel, I couldn’t find anything to wear. It had been two weeks maybe since I did a decent load of laundry. I looked around for some jeans and a shirt that at least smelled alright and threw them on my bed. But now I had no underwear. Out of desperation, I went upstairs and took one of my moms. Eww, I know, but whats a girl to do?
After eating something and putting some socks on, I called Ben back. “Hi, Ben?” I asked. “Who is this?” his dad asked, angrily. I hung up. “Ben didn’t say his dad had a day off!?” I thought. I grabbed my coat and decided to hang over at Joshes, hoping Ben would go over there. When I came to the door, Josh answered. “Oh, hey!” he said, then asked me in. “Hey,” I said, then saw Ben, “ Ben! Oh my gosh, did you know your dad’s home?” I asked. “Yeah, uh, sorry.” he said, walking back in the living room. “Is something up?” I asked Josh, whispering. “Just a bad day, thats all.” Josh replied. I walked in the room after taking off my boots and sat across from Ben. It was quiet for a second and Ben wouldn’t even look me in the eye. “Soo, whats the dealio?” I asked, trying to get someone else to talk besides myself. “I’m being sent to my grandparents.” Ben said, calmly. I choked. “Your, your, what?” I asked. “My father, he’s sending me to my grandparents.” he repeated. “I heard that, but why?!” I asked, angrily. “He thinks your a bad influence. I can’t believe he thought that...”he says. “This is crap! What the heck does this guy have against me! Its like he thinks I’m the Devil or something!?” I shouted. “Yea, I’ve known Ash for forever and your dad’s always had it in for her, so whats his problem?” Josh asked. Ben shook his head. “I don’t care what anyone says, I’m going to tell this jerk off!” I said. “No! You’ll only make it worse...” Ben pleaded. “This is just crap. I mean, what father would punish his son because of stuff his girlfriend does?” I asked. “You didn’t do anything Ash, it was me.” Ben replied. “You don’t need to blame yourself, Ben...” I told him. “I kinda do. I sorta, cussed at my parents.” he said. “No! Oh my goodness! Let the world end now! He probly deserved it!” I shouted. Josh, over in his chair, started to chuckle. Ben even realized that he sounded alittle stupid. “Did you say sorry!?” I asked, shocked. “Yeah! I did!” Ben said, starting to laugh. “Hey, Josh, you, Ben and me wanna go see a movie?” I asked. “Sure! Which one?” he asked. “Titanic’s out.” I said. “Girly movie!!” Josh and Ben replied, simultaneously. “Oh, gee! I forgot that I’m a guy when I’m around you two! Ok...DUH! Of course a girly movie, but you guys, I heard theres a nude scene...” I said. “What are the times??” Josh asked, smiling. We all started to laugh.
Ben drove us to the cinema and we all walked in the front doors, when we saw Mandy and this guy, making out right in the front. Me and Ben looked at each other and shook our heads, bought the tickets and walked right past her without even saying hi. Josh was motionless. Ben and me felt really bad for him. Mandy and him were really close and now so far away. Ben had to grab Joshs arm and walk him in the theater. When we walked in to grab seats, every good seat was gone and we were made to take front seats. I didn’t mind because I liked front seats. Its gave you all the leg room you could ever ask for. Ben and Josh complained. Can you believe that?
When the movie started, we noticed Josh kept looking for someone behind him and we were 99.9 % sure who. But I can be absolutly sure that when Rose took off all her clothes, Ben and Josh were silent as little lambs.Ben thought the movie lacked ‘action’ but I swear, when everyone around me cried when the people were shown froze in the water, I laughed. Ben looked over at me, along with Josh, like I was some freak. “They look like little Gonzo’s man! Look!” I whispered. Three people behind me told me to be quiet, as they sobbed. I got up and excused myself, to spare a public stoning if anyone got mad at me for laughing. I walked out and went to the bathroom. When I walked past a stall, I heard someone throwing up. Still in a weird mood, I say, “Bad popcorn?” I ask. The person opens up. It was Mandy. “Mandy?” I ask, confused. She looks at me, and walks to the sink. “Are you sick?” I ask, still having that friendly attitude. “You could call it that..look, why are so concerned? Two hours ago you were defacing property with my name all over and now your Miss Carebear?” she says. She had a point but a person is a person, no matter who they are. “Forgive me for being nice, something you forgot how to do a long time ago, Princess Cedar Chip...” I reply. “Don’t ever call me that again...” she mumbled, then stomped out of the bathroom.
“WHATEVER!!”, I screamed as loud as I could, when a little girl and her mother came out of a stall and looked at me strangely. I walked out, bought some juju’s and went back in. Gosh darn it, the dang movie was still on. Except the retarded old woman, pulled out the jewel, which could have fetched her a fortune and threw it in the frickin’ water! I was so surprised, I punched Ben in the arm on accident. “Oww..” he whined. “I can’t believe that old geezer!” I shouted, forgetting that I was in a packed full room of people that could very well possibly beat the crap outta me. “Why did she do that!?” I shouted some more. Someone behind me told me to ‘stuff it’ and another one told me he’d tell security. “Oh wow! Why don’t you go whine to your mommy!?” I said in a normal tone. Ben, probly sitting there grinding his teeth, swung me around and started to make out with me. Smooth move, it did shut me up.
Josh had to tell Ben and me the end of the movie, and I was so disapointed. “That was dumbest movie I ever saw!” I exclaimed. “I dunno, I kinda liked it.” Josh told us. “I’m sure you did...to bad naked women don’t float my boat though...” I told them both. They blushed. “Thats aight, I won’t tell your mommies.” I said. “I can’t believe you were shouting during the movie!” Ben said after awhile of pause. “I can! I do it all the time at home...” I said. “Well, yea, I know but hon, never at a movie theater?!” he said, lovingly. “Did you call me ‘hon’?” I asked. “Ummm...” he says with a sly grin stretched across his face. “Someone needs spanked!” I yell. Ben bursts out laughing. “Oh no! Anything but that!” he shouts back. I raised my eyebrows and held my hand up, “Bend over...” I say. “Oh no!! NOOOOOO!!” he yells, running fast to the car, with Josh lagging behind. “Hey thats not fair!” I shout. I go after him. “Get in, Josh! Don’t let her in!” he says. “You bad boys! I’m telling your mommies!!” I yell. Finally after threatening never to kiss Ben ever again, he let me in. When I sat down, I quickly grabbed ahold of Ben’s head and gave him the biggest noogie ever. He screamed in what was eiether sheer pain or embarrassment and pryed my fingers off. Then we both exchanged raspberries and paper napkins. Josh sat, hand against face and head against window, with a sad, pathetic pout plastered on his face. I couldn’t help but ask what was up. He grunted something that sounded like a ‘nuttin’ and re-positioned his body against the window. Tired of prying information out of people, since it obviously failed miserably with Mandy, I just let it be.
When we dropped Josh off, Ben asked me to sit with him in front. I hopped out quickly and climbed in. “Whats up with Osh kosh?” I asked. “I"m not sure. Latly, he’s just been acting real depressed. If I tell you something, do you promise to not tell any other soul?” he asked me. This had to be serious. I promised. “Joshes father went bankrupt and they might have to sell Parker’s Palace and thier home. Josh told me about a month ago about it and also said that if he didn’t have Mandy, he’d never get through it.” he said. “Oh my god, poor Josh...” I mumbled, sadly. “Then after a week after they broke up, two days after the polar bear incident, he tried to commit suicide.” he said. My heart stopped and my mouth went dry. “How...I mean, no thats personal. But, why?” I asked, trying not to be so nosy. “He wouldn’t tell me. Ash, I’m scared for him. He needs help. It took me awhile to get him to go anywhere for awhile. We need to do something.” he said. “Wait...wait, what did Josh say to us before he got out?” I asked, thinking hard. “Goodbye...,” then our eyes locked. We ran out of the car, hearts racing, adrenaline pumping. Ben slammed open the door and at the top of the stairs was Josh with a gun to his head. “JOSH!!” Ben screamed. Joshes little sister walked out of her room, when the gun sounded, Josh fell to the floor and started to roll down the steps.
I collapsed to the ground, my heart seemingly frozen in time. Ben ran to his side. “Josh! Josh, talk, TALK!” he yelled. Joshes sister sat crying at the foot of her brother, pounding the floor. Then we heard him whisper, “I’m sorry...” and he died. A dark cloud covered the sun at that moment and not a car passed through the street. Everyone was wailing at the top of thier lungs. It would be a day, none of us could forget. The funeral ceremony was beautiful. We held in Parker’s Palace and buried him at a childhod spot where we all had the best times of our life. Josh would be a man I would nor could ever forget. It’s strange. All of a sudden, when someone dies, all the mean things you did to them seem to come flooding back to your memory. None of us could keep a dry face. Even Mandy showed up. After everyone else had left, Ben, Mandy and I all sat up in our childhood tree, staring down at Joshes grave. “I just can’t beleive he’s actually gone.” I murmur. Ben didn’t say a word but I could sense what he was thinking. “You know it’s not your fault, right?” I asked. He rolled his eyes in my direction then back down at his grave. “You can’t blame yourself for his death, Ben.” I tell him. He doesn’t budge but mumbles something I didn’t undertstand. Mandy all of a sudden broke down and started to scream. My attention fled from Ben and shifted to Mandy. “Whats wrong?” I asked. She just wailed louder, pounding at herself, shaking her head back and forth. “Whats wrong?” I asked again. “I’m pregnant!!!” she yelled. I swear had I not already been shocked and on the brink of breaking down myself, this practically gave me a heart attack. Ben shot up, straightening his back, and his mouth seemed to droop to his knees. “Wha-wh-...” but no words could dictate what I wanted to ask. High school wasn’t our problem anymore. We were.
Mandy, Ben and me must have talked four hours straight up in that crookity old tree we had once named our ‘fortress’. Alot about our memories about Josh, alot of crying and alot of quiet moments. After just seeing him two days before it’s hard to be convinced that the 17 year old boy we once so lovingly called Osh Kosh, the boy who would sneak all sorts of food out from his house so Ben, Mandy and me could have treehouse picnics, even when it rained, was never going to come back. Mandy and me knew that Ben was it taking hard but neither of us could prepare for what happened the following day.
When Mandy and me showed up at school together, not only did it give her new preppy friends a jolt, but also started alot of crazy rumors, so off-base I could’ve punched quite a few people for. My sadness really did stop me from hurting anyone though. Guess they got off easy. When History class rolled around, Ben wasn’t there. Mike handed me a note expressing his sadness for me, which out of all the cards I got, meant the most considering how I dumped him. My attention was really wrecked though, wondering where Ben was, hoping he was ok. Joshes death was putting Mandy and me both on our edges, even if we wanted to be or not. I sat there, pretending to pay attention, for 90 agonizing minutes. Soon it would all end. Very soon.
When I went to my locker, printed in huge black marker was a certain five letter word and ‘DIE’. My eyes swelled with tears, but not to ruin my tough girl reputation, hid my head in my locker. I made it look like I had lost something in there, so not to drag attention to myself, when Mandy popped her head next to me. “Hey, Ash, you alright?” she whispered. I lifted my head out a bit, wiping my leaking eyes and told her to look at my locker. “Oh my god, your gonna tell the principal, right?” she asked. “You kidding? After what I did in there the last time, how the heck could I go back in there?” I asked, expecting she had heard about it. She had because she remarked, “Oh, right, bad idea.” I sighed, asked for a mirror and tried to hide what was left of my emotional breakdown. “Why you so bent on hiding you cryin’?” she asked. “I promised someone I would never cry for dumb reasons, is that all right with you?” I asked, getting sarcastic. “Hey, whoa, I just wanted to know. Soory.” she replied. “You got a quarter, I wanna call Ben, he wasn’t here today.” I asked. “So I noticed. You think he’s ok?” she asked. “I’d like to think so, but I guess you never can know everything anymore.” I said, refrencing to Joshes suicide. “Well, it’s not like I didn’t know Josh was depressed.” she mumbled. “What’d you say?” I said, a bit louder than normal. “Ash, look, I just thought it was over some dumb thing that happened between us, I’m sorry!” she shouted. Something snapped inside me. “Your the frickin’ reason that one of my best friends is dead, and you knew that he was feeling that way and your saying ‘SORRY’!??!” I said, backing her up against a locker. Before I could hit her, I remembered she was pregnant and walked away, saying ‘she wasn’t worth it’. I bummed a quarter off of Samantha and called him up on the schools payphone. “Hello, is Ben there?” I asked, talking to Ben’s mom. “No hun, he didn’t come back from school yet, why?” she asked. Without saying goodbye, I just hung up the phone and ran out the front door straight to Parker’s Palace. Breath heavy, I approached the tree with light footsteps, afraid to see what I had feared. With a loud voice, I shouted Ben’s name up towards the tree. With much relief, his head popped out from above the limb. “God Ben, you scared the crap out of me today! Don’t ever do that to me again!” I shouted. “Come up here.” was all he replied with. I tapped my foot at the ground a few times, sighed, and started up the tree. Ben reached for my hand and yanked me up to the base, and sat back down. “You weren’t here all day, were you?” I asked. He didn’t answer. “I finally know how it felt for you to lose your brother, Ash. All these years, Josh was like the brother I never had and now, now he’s...” he started but then began to cry again. The sight of him crying made me cry with him. We sat in each others arms and consoled each other, when we heard a gunshot. Both of us shot up, startled, when Ben sat down and started to laugh. “What?” I asked, still panicked. “It’s the start of deer season...god, we are so pyscho.” I chuckled at the way we had acted as well. “I have been a pyscho all day, goodness...” I murmured. He kissed my head and said, “Thats ok, at least were losing our sanity together.” In a weird way, that was actually romantic to me. Suddenly, we heard someone climbing up the ladder. Mandy’s head popped up. “Oh, I didn’t expect to see you.” she uttered. “I’m sure.” I replied, sarcastically. “Ashley, I feel bad about..., god, do you think I wanted this to happen?! None of us are to blame for Josh killing himself, thats just something no other person could have stopped but Josh. You have to know that.” she tells me. “Yea, well looks like instant karma to me.” I said. Ben’s head raised then lowered. Suddenly, one lone tear fell from Mandy’s eye and I knew I had crossed the line. I grabbed her and hugged her tightly, as tears of my own began to fall. Without words, I told her that I had been wrong for saying that. We looked at each other and shared expressions. She wiped her tear then said, “I, I found out who did that to your locker, Ash.” she told me. “Did what?” Ben asked. “They wrote Die b-word Die.” I told him. “Those punks! Mandy, tell me who did it.” he said. “Rachel did it. It was supposed to be me and her to do it, but that was before Joshes death. Ash, I’m so sorry.” she apoligized. “Thats ok, right now I couldn’t think of three people I’d rather be with than you guys.” I told them. “Three?” Mandy asked. I looked up into the trees. “Don’t you feel it?” I asked. Ben and Mandy shared confused expressions. “Umm, hun I thought we were gonna lose our sanity together?” he asked. I closed my eyes and out-stretched my arms. “Josh will always be with us...” I said, then placed my hand on my heart, “right here.” I said. They smiled for maybe the first thing that day. Ben closed his eyes and started to laugh. “Hmm?” I asked. “Just thinkin’ ‘bout the time Josh and me went fishing and he got the fly stuck on his nose. He cried sooo hard!!” he said. We laughed. “You never told me that!” I said. “Me neither!” Mandy exclaimed. “He made me promise to never tell you guys, you know how hard he tried to keep a good rep.” he told us. We laughed and laughed and when we were done, we laughed some more. Life was possible without Josh, because as long as he was in our hearts and mind, he would never die.
Ben walked me home and Mandy drove home by herself. We both felt that had Mandy and Josh stayed together he’d be alive but she thought otherwise. “It makes me so angry.” Ben mumbles. “Me too, Ben.” I told him. As we walked through the path of Parkers Palace to leave, Ben suddenly picked up a huge branch and started smacking it against a tree, screaming. I started to cry. He was in so much pain and had no other way to show it. I grabbed his arm gently and hugged him. “It’ll be okay, Ben. It’ll be alright.” I told him, but wasn’t sure if it would ever be.
When we finally reached my house, we walked in the garage and sat down behind my moms car to talk some more. “Josh and me, we had plans to go to college together, ya know, be best friends forever, I just feel so betrayed and hurt.” he told me. I was speechless but layed my head on his shoulder to show that I was there for him. “You’ll find someone new, someone...” I started when he jumped up away from me. “Someone new?! There’ll never be someone new. Ever!!” he screamed and walked out of the garage, leaving me behind. I sunk my head between my legs and sighed. “Ashley? Are you out there?” my mom called from the garage door. “Yeah, I’m here.” I shouted back. She sighed and shut the door, walking toward me. “Come here.” she said. I got up and hugged her. “Everythings just so wrong, Mom.” I sobbed. “I know, you’ve been through alot this past year and I’d like to say it’ll get better but I can promise you that whatever happens, I will be there for you. You can count on that. “she said. And for maybe the third time in my life, I saw my mother cry. We looked at each other, grinned and walked inside. Til this day, I don’t quite understand how my mother could have been so strong for herself and for me at the same time. I guess I never will.
Something that day, made me visit my brother’s grave. I knew he couldn’t hear what I had to say but to just to sit next to him, offered a comfort no one else could understand. “How ya doin’ Brian?” I asked. I didn’t expect an answer, I already knew it. “Josh is gone now too. Yea, he’s gone. He got buried at the Fortress. You remember the Fortress, right? You probly wouldn’t. You were always so busy with your friends. You would have liked it, it had a bridge sorta connecting to another tree, though we can’t cross it now, too fat, but our main room is still up. Maybe someday I’ll take a picture of it. For memories I guess.” I said, tears starting to crawl down my face. “Oh I’m sorry. I promised, I promised you. Its just so hard to live without you, Brian...so hard. Sometimes, sometimes I wish I was never born...ya know? Everything is just so wrong...Mandy’s pregnant, Ben is probly mad at me, Josh is gone, your gone, who is left? I feel like I’m cursed sometimes...have you ever felt that way? Nah, I guess not. You had better things to think about. Football practice and Becky. By the way, she is dating Mark now, your friend but no worry, they both still think of you.” I wiped my face and smiled. “I gotta go now, gettin’ dark out...” I said, “I love you...” I whispered. I bent down and kissed his gravestone, got up and slowly walked away.
Late in the night, at about 11:30, Ben called me. He told me he was so mean to me, that Joshes death was really making him do things to people he really didn’t mean to do. I forgave him. “You gonna be at school tommorow?” I asked. “I might be.” he told me. “I won’t. I’m thinking about skipping, you wanna join me? Ya know, sorta before you head to your grandparents?” I asked. “Yea, I’d like that.” he told me, then said, “You remember that day at Lake Winnopta?” he asked me. “Are you kidding, I think about that day alot.” I tell him. “I mean before your brothers...” he said and stopped himself. “His death?” I asked, letting him know it was ok to say it. “Yeah that. I just want you to know, I’ll always love you. I would jump in front of a bullet if it meant you wouldn’t get hurt. I love you.” he told me. “I love you too, Ben. So much. You mean the world to me.” I told him. “I’ll miss you.” he tells me. “When are you leaving?” I asked. “Tommorow night.” he told me. “Tommorow night?!” I shouted. “I was wondering, could we...” he started then stopped. “Could we...? What are you trying to say?” I asked. “Nevermind, it was a stupid suggestion.” he told me, then it hit me. “You mean...? Ben, I-” I started. “It was stupid, just forget about it.” he told me. “I’m sorry, Ben. I just, I just never thought you’d ask something like that.” I told him. “Ash, it was stupid, forget about it, alright?” he asked me. “Yeah, I guess.” I said, still speechless. “I’ll see you tommorow??” he asked. “Yea, tommorow.” I managed to say. “Bye.” he said, then hung up. I set the phone down and caught my breath. That day, I saw a side of Ben I had never seen before. Everyone was growing up sexually and I was left wondering if there was something wrong with me.
“He really asked you that?!” Mandy said over the phone. “Yeah, I was so shocked I could hardly answer back.” I said, saying it low enough that my mother couldn’t hear. “Go Ben!!” Mandy exclaimed. “Not go Ben, he really freaked me out, Mandy.” I tell her in all seriousness. “Look, he’s a seventeen year old guy, when did you think he was gonna ask you, when he was thirty??” she asked me. “I just never thought he was like that. Thats all.” I say. “Hello!! He’s a guy, they’re always thinking about it. God, it’s like you live under a rock, Ash!” she replied. “I do not! I just never thought he’d ask me. The boy I’ve known my whole life, come on, it would freak you out too.” I told her. “Obviously not, I’m the one pregnant here, not you!” she told me. “Did Josh ever know?” I asked. “Thats why I broke up with him.” she told me. “But why? He would have been so faithful!” I ask her. “Please, I’ve watched Ricki Lake too many times to fall for the boy loves girl crap again.” she told me. “That doesn’t happen all the time, Mandy. I swear you watch to many soap operas sometimes.” I tell her. She laughs, then someone calls her name. “I gotta go. Nana and me are going to the mall. Wanna come?” she asks. “Not really...have fun.” I tell her. “Hmm, well it’s your life. See ya at school tommorow.” she says and clicks off before I could tell her I wouldn’t be there. “Who were ya talkin’ too, Ash?” my mom asks, her head poked through the laundry room door. “Just Mandy.” I tell her. “Oh, you guys are talking again. Thats good. Well, just wanted to let you know I’m going over to John’s again tonight. Dinners on the stove, I’ll be back alittle after 10:00. Come here and give me a kiss.” she says. “Mom, please! Just go and have a good time.” I tell her. “Ok, love ya.” she exclaims and walks away.
John was mom’s steady boyfriend. He was an ok guy but when he tries to make a joke it turns out sorta perverted. Thank God I’m usually gone when he’s over. I walked out of the laundry room and smelled what mom had invented. Sometimes its good and alot of the times it’s just plain wrong. It was a mix of spinach, cheese and pork. My nose of course turned up the thought of eating it and walked away. I plopped down on the sofa and flipped through the channels when a news headline flashed on. “Bill Clinton confessess to his affair with Ms. Monica Lewinsky, more next.” I scoffed. “I guess I’m not the only one who has problems then.” Suddenly the phone rang. “Hello?” I answered. “Hello, is this the daughter of Mrs. Moore?” a man said. “Yes, is something wrong?” I asked. “There’s been an accident. Your mothers in the hospital in stable condition.” he replied. “Oh my god...which hospital?” I asked. “Getterman’s Memorial Hospital.” he told me. “Thank you so much.” I said and hung up. I grabbed my coat and rushed out the door.
When I reached the hospital, I asked which room she was in. “Room 24, take a right then a left and it’ll be the first on your right.” the woman told me. I rushed around the corners to my mothers room. “Mom?!” I shouted. “Ashley...” a hoarse voice called out. When I saw her, it hardly looked like a car accident. “Mom...what happened?” I asked, holding her hand. “Me and John got in an argument and...” she started. “He beat you?!!?” I shouted. “Oh honey, he didn’t mean to do it, he really loves me.” she told me. “Where is he??!!” I shouted again. “Please honey, he didn’t mean to do it.” she told me. “Tell me where he is or I’ll find out myself.” I ordered her. “He’s being held by the police downstairs.” she told me. I shot up out of the seat and walked out of the room with sheer determination to break every bone in his body without cracking my prothestic leg. When I saw him, I rolled my hand into a fist and pounded him so hard it knocked him to the ground. Before I could hit him again, the policemen held me back. “You ever come near my mother again and I’ll make sure you’ll never be able to call yourself a man EVER again!!” I screamed. They made me sit and calm down. I wanted nothing but to hurt him like he had hurt my mother and me.
With a cracked rib and bloody lip, my mother was wheeled out of that hospital with whatever was left of her dignity. I was hurt that my mother, who took no crap from anyone else, would allow herself to stay in a relationship that was obviously wrong for her. I couldn’t believe I had been so ignorant to when she would come home with bruises that she would link to ‘Oh I dropped a bowling ball on my thumb’ or ‘I accidentally ran into a door’. It made me feel glad Ben would never hurt me. My head throbbing because of crying we went home. I didn’t speak with her for the rest of the night angry she had been lying to me for so long. When I checked the answering machine, Ben had called. “Hey Ashley, it’s Ben. It’s about 2:34 right now and your probly, no definatly asleep, I just wanted to let you know I was sorry for what I said the last time we talked and that I’d be more than happy to wait. Bye.” I grinned, changed into my pajamas and went to sleep.
The next morning, feeling bad for abandoning my mom at a time in her life she needed soemone to lean on, I made her breakfast in bed. “Ashley, I’m so sorry for lying to you for so long. I hate myself so much for doing that to you...would you forgive me?” she asked. “In a heartbeat.” I told her and lightly hugged her. “You better get ready for school. You only have a few minutes.” she told me. “Yeah...you get some rest, alright?” I said. Now I felt guilty for lying to her. “I will.” she told me, blew me a kiss and nestled back down in her bed. I stopped in Brian’s room and opened his lock box, picked up a condom, just in case, and closed it. No more chaste little Ashley. I ran out the door and found Ben leaning up against the house. “Hey...” he said to me. I took out the condom and waved it at him. “Where’d you get that?!?” he said shocked. “My brothers room. Wanna test it out?” I said, grinning. I saw a ‘yes’ in his eyes and a no come from his mouth. “Why not? I thought you wanted to?” I asked, angrily. “First, thats a guys condom and second, I think we should wait.” he told me. I walked away, half ticked off, half really embarassed. “I cannot believe I even did this.” I mumbled to myself. “Ash, don’t worry...I won’t hold this against you as long as you don’t hold it against me.” he told me, since we were both guilty of wanting this sacred pleasure. “Promise?” he asked. I sighed, “I promise.” I told him. “Great, now lets forget what just happened and savor the time we have together.” he tells me, grabbing my hand. He drives us to the mall. “What are we gonna do here?” I ask. “Just so you can buy whatever you want.” he told me. We got in and he told me to pick a store while he went to go buy a cd. Disapointed we were separated the second we got in, I happily picked out a few things and waited for him to return. After 45 minutes of waiting, I was getting angry. A few minutes before I was ready to just leave all the stuff there, I saw a huge cake start to go past the shop when it stopped. The baker or so I thought, asked me if I wanted a piece. Hungry from waiting, I accepted. Just as the man was ready to cut it, Ben jumped out of the top with a t-shirt that said, “Ashley Moore, Will You Marry Me?” My heart soared. Without any other thought in my mind, I shouted a yes. Everyone around clapped and Ben came down and hugged me, and kissed me. “This just makes everything so much better!” I said, crying. “I told you I loved you!” he replied. I could never put in words how I felt at that moment. But if there was one wish I could have, that was it.
I wanted so badly to tell my mom but Ben thought it would be a bad idea, since we were supposed to be at school. I agreed. “You think your parents will still make you go to your grandparents?” I asked. “Yeah, but in two months I turn 18 so they can’t make me stay there anymore when that happens.” he tells me. “Will we have to wait for me to turn 18?” I asked. “According to law, yeah. According to me, nope.” he said. “I don’t think we’ll have much of a choice if the law says we can’t.” I say. “I guess. I can’t wait to marry you, Ashley. I couldn’t imagine anyone else I’d rather grow old with than you.” he tells me. “Grow old! Dreadful thought...” I said, joking around. He laughed and kissed me. “I want so badly to tell the world!! I want everyone to know!” I said. “I wanna scream it through the trees too, but that is a very bad idea right now.” he told me. “Hey, I didn’t get to see what you bought yet!” he told me. “You mean on me?” I asked. “Yeah.” he said. “Well, where would I change them? In your car?” I asked. “Yeah, if you want.” he said. “Sure, I don’t care!” I said and started to take off my pants and shirt. Ben promised not look but I caught him peeking. When I was done, he was stunned. “You look beautiful!! What is this coat, suede?” he asked. “Yep...well, fake suede.” I told him. “And leather pants!” he exclaims. “Fake leather pants!” I exclaim back. “Well, my blushing bride, what say you we go and tell Josh?” he asks. “I say we shall.” I say, squeezing his hand as he drives up to Parker’s palace when we noticed the road was blocked off. “Stay here.” he told me. He walked out and asked what they were doing. He started to yell something and came back to the car. “Ben whats up? What are they doing?” I asked. “They’re tearing down Parker’s Palace and building a hotel.” he said, grinding his teeth in anger. He grabbed the shift and told me to hold on. He ran through the road block and squeeled around trucks and bulldozers. “Ben!!”I shouted, clutching to the chair for my life. He told me we were going to see Josh and stop the building. As much as I loved Parker’s Palace and to keep Josh there, I knew we could never stop this. I allowed Ben to try but when it was apparent to him that we would never be able to do it, he grabbed me, hugged me and started to cry. He requested that Joshes body be able to be transferred to another graveyard and they agreed. It was only 11:00 and Ben already wanted the day to end. “Ben...” I tried to say but he just sat quietly, a hurt, angry expression on his face. “Everything is falling apart.” he mumbled. I held his hand. “We’re not. And we never will.” I told him. “How can you be so sure?!” he cried, “how can you be so sure that I don’t get killed in a plane crash on my way to my grandparents? You don’t know, do you?” he said. I knew he was hurting inside but he was being really mean to me so I asked him to either talk to me about it and get it off his chest or take me home. He couldn’t decide so we just didn’t talk for awhile.
I felt awful that Ben was so angry at me that I almost asked him to take me home. “Are you hungry?” he asked. “Alittle.” I answered. So he drove us to a Burger King and went in. We ordered and sat down. “Are you worried about Mandy?” he asked me. “She can take care of herself.” I told him. “I mean, her baby. The way she runs off with the first guy who gives her the time of day makes me worry about her getting an STD.” he says. “Your awful blunt.” I replied. “I have to be.” he tells me. “Are you saying Mandy’s a slut?” I asked. “No, just awful, uhh, loose.” he says. “Well, thats not our problem, thats Mandy’s.” I said, which was true but also alittle concieted. “It is our problem when it’s Joshes baby.” he says. “It’s not his, she told me it was-” I started. “Well, how much that Mandy’s been telling alot of people latly is true?” he says. “Not much, but hey, she wouldn’t lie to us like that.” I replied. “You’d be surprised.” he answers. What Ben said had made me think deeper into what Mandy had already told me, doubting its truth. After finishing our food we walked out and he asked me if I wanted to go somewhere special. I thought and decided. “I’d really love to go to Lake Winnopta if it’s still frozen.” I said. He must have been in a better mood because he smiled at me. “Your wish is my command.” he replied, sweetly.
When we got there, the sun was just about reaching its peak in the sky as birds chased each other through the gray mass of clouds. Ben wrapped his warm body around mine, squeezed me tightly and kissed me. “I remember that day like it just happened.” I said. “Hmmm...?” he asked. “Josh was asking Mandy to date him again, you and me almost fell off the cliff, Josh hollered at me for playing around with that trap, and that wild horse ride.” I said. “That was a great day, oh...half-day.” he replied. “I can’t beleive I’m gonna be a Mrs. Ben Harrington.” I said. “I can’t either, angel, I can’t either.” We stood there, wind blowing in our faces with only the dreams in our heads and the soul in our hearts keeping us alive together.
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