He slept upon a pillow that did not crease under his weight. It was not his, not his to taint with his unorthodox warp spped and chewed-down fingernails... and so he befriended his successor, the vandal, the innocent with eyes of saucers and an electric blue about his face that you, ma cherie, you would have found bewitching, had you returned... but you stole off into the night without so much as a whisper or a finger to your poor father's lips, doing so you broke him, and he ceased to be as the rain fell. Then the Sheriff of Nottingham rode in on his white horse, Maid Marion no resist, he was the hero in this tale, what reason otherwise? The alarm rings, slight jump of the heart - that can't be good for your cholesterol but you must rise TODAY not tomorrow it's your fault chances are gone, knapsack on shoulders, twilight kissing it's blessing. A watched pot never boils, even when you're hungry. It hurt then, the pain in my side licked at me like the lions in the den pardon me I must excuse myself, truly sorry. Hold my wine for me will you dear? Unlike then when you had four types of gun you now have but a fingernail with which to destroy the Prince of Darkness, my left hand, I miss that the most. I almost joined it you know, when it was severed from my wrist and flung into that pit you dug especially. So romantic - to die for a hand - it must have meant something... but my flesh rots and melts while I pretend it was never mine Be OFF iwth you now I stand on nothing that will not hold me in these sixty knot winds, sixty knots all in my hair, comb them out Mommy will you? Combing not the word - wrenching AT LEAST THEY'RE GONE pretty soon me too
There is no feeling, that is the point. In fact it is so empty I cannot recall, I cannot ever imagine that I felt anything at all. Life is a black hole sun behind a cloud, voices making no impact... pincushions subtley rejecting pins. He thinks I do not realise, he thinks I don't notice a thing when really I am fully omnicscient, all knowing all seeing all dying a painful public death the moment he washes his hands. I am his guinea-pig, his Silly Putty, the play-doh of his whims; his experience - only numbers matter. There is no feeling not even an OUNCE of excitement, anticipation - just a prostitute, robotic, let's get it over with so I can tell them about it... words last more than deeds, now I have a badge. Well I won't let that happen, I refuse to bow yet I know I will because I was born gutless and weak, giving in to every bent knee, every whine broke my resolve in two. My sword bearer would not hesitate so, I fall there and then, a death that kills nothing - nothing
I suddenly hate myself with a passion, this wicked cat and mouse game I play ruins me severe... the clouds seem closer today, the joker I tease so oft begins to get angry. I should not bluff one day he will hold me to this defiant promise and where will I go, what will I do then? The angel sucks me dry, gnaws at my spirit but he cannot be blamed - the only fault I pin one of beauty - otherwise he is simply the victim in the wrong place at the wrong time, it could have been anyone... but I swear to you I will fix, I love you enough to apologize
It feels different now, there is a certain sense of No Not Yet resist the temptation but she smiles strokes I ask myself why not treat? You deserve, you must have done something... old cliché, old boot, can never find laces for them anymore... don't miss it baby, don't miss it till it's gone with the wind, where shall I go, what shall I do? Let's get some fast food hon, have I bought too much? Can't let it die, show no fear, no pride, no inkling of a weakness cos lovie as the sun goes down it's all highlighted, they'll all see it, even Butler who you smile so good for, she loves that yellow chairbag... How about we listen to "Love Songs Til Midnight" together, see if our names come up? Don't hit me please, don't black my eyes... your fists don't matter enough to even make a dent, though I wish I'd bleed at least a little, the pain would bring more relief than fabric softener even ECSTASY soaring upward - putre satisfaction not diluted, fingernails clean... but now, now, very now, you draw your knife from that sheath so cleverly hid within your leather... it works this time, the cut though lacks the desired poison Bandaids won't fix this one lass a kiss and a cuddle aren't enough yet it goes away with a peanut butter sandwich, what is your formula? I scraped my kneww while skateboarding but who believes that one anymore? Not enough words here to quench a rat's thirst, let alone make a poem
Today is D day Sammy, I'm here at last - doth mock the wind blowing et al. Visual breath resting on the air, hearts smaller than the norm - Chelsea that's not the mean! Constricted pupils, giggle at me sweetheart, it makes me feel worth... like the sun, smiles, spit, the car won't stop even if you ask nicely and you wonder why you're left feeling stupid? Need I explain, need I go into something painted so clearly in the trees? Bird's eye view, outer in, try that for a lark or even just a moment of clarity... a Big Mac, what a sin. Is hate better than nothing?... I once couldn't care. It was just the shower that hissed as it cooled my blush that sated my embargo that embargo being or not being, he could choose, I did care but upsetting the King, the one on the donkey - you'd think he'd pick a limo, upsetting the King was one that does not bear thinking ever, yet when all is said and the deed is done it's even slightly refreshing, anyone for a swim? I promise, I promise I won't let you drown
The creature leapt and grabbed the throat of the hand that fed it - then the stars, what's new, any specials? The radio said there were, but make your way down there, make your way down there son, you'll find they're all sold out, all gone to the rich old lady on a pension, blue knit hat, they agreed that she was the best parishioner. Don't smoke they forewarned, the dust and grey will clog and stuck, mucus doesn't leave - you'll never get out of it alive. When you heave my sweet, when it scrapes and scars your inside then it will be, then you will remember that all is one day forgotten - blackboards wiped spotless, Robin Hood, dusters cleaned on the concrete with the air choking spluttering wishing for the heart to forgive - simple in theory, practically impossible mercy dies as soon as you glance away keep CONCENTRATING man, smile to love, it should be breathing but nature - will never be. William Tell could've lost a son, how do you feel? Fiction, fantasy - emotions nothing like, like smiling, dying, fading it's gone Mommy where's it gone? And she smiles, kisses his forehead because it's okay even when it's not and that's why my dog's head slides under my arm, his eyes get darker and his eyebrows a whiter shade of pale than you could ever imagine Maestro, you with your limitless imagination and thoughts and dreams. That's when the whistle blows, the train stops but give it a hundred metres leeway buddy, you never know
"'Twas grace that brought me safe thus far, and grace will lead me home."
- Isaac Watts
[Ma Soeur] [Quotes] [Namesake] [Monologues] [Poetry] [Home] [Chelsea Moments]
