I have begun my early morning walks again. It is still quite dark when I start out, but lightens up quickly. I much prefer the early morning; I am definitely NOT an evening person.
People around here call me Miss Manatee, but actually I am a Mrs. At least I think I still am. My childhood sweetheart and I were married at 18, and ten years later, when I was pregnant with Elizabeth, he disappeared. I don't know why; I think he just was scared of the reality of children and what that meant. I always wanted a big family, and so the Inn has filled a hole left by his disertion.
I'm grateful that we had purchased this old house. It needed a lot of work, but he was handy with carpentry, (and he learned plumbing very quickly!) and I'm a dandy wallpaper hanger, so we had it shipshape and ready for our first guests in about 10 months. It was tough at first, but a couple of angels helped me get the mortgage signed over into my name, and extended so that I could manage the payments.
For the first two years after he left, I had to work in a local factory on the second shift to make the payments. It made me very nervous to leave the Inn for the evenings, but Cook stood by me and kept an eye out while I worked. Then, when Elizabeth was born, Cook cared for her until I finally felt secure enough to quit the job.
I haven't had time to make many friends outside of the long-term guests, but life here is pleasant, even though hard work. The mixture of personalities creates turmoil, but I'm never bored! The farm is doing better than I had ever hoped, and Enrique Cortez is a wonderful manager. He and Elena, his wife, have been a godsend to me. And of course, I love having their babies in the little child care room every day while Elena helps me with the housework and the laundry.
There are so many stories permeating this old house. Some are swirling around the current guests, and some are embedded in the walls. There are always rumors of a ghost or two, and I wouldn't doubt that there is a basis for at least some of the "sightings". If there IS one roaming around, I'm sure Elizabeth will find it; she is one precocious child.
Somedays I get very lonely and sad for what I lost when Mr. decided he couldn't face being a father. We had been friends since early childhood, and we had played together everyday as children. I really expected to spend the rest of my life with him. But I have Elizabeth, and she is more than enough for me most of the time. I am still young, but managing this Inn doesn't leave me any time to find male companionship. Besides, I still hope Mr. will eventually come home.
Meanwhile, I live a vicarious life through my guests, trying not to become enmeshed in their squabbles and troubles. I lend a sympathetic ear when I feel it is important, but I keep a certain distance between me and the people who provide a living for us.
6:52 PM
It's been a while since I have sat at this computer. I was away all last week at an excellent conference in Ypsilanti, Michigan. This week has been crazy and I just have been too tired at night to write anything but a couple E-Mails.
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