Voices

Why do they call? I do not know.

What do they say? I cannot understand.

I close my eyes, breathing deeply, ridding my mind of all that goes on around me, turning to look into my soul. As I gaze within myself, I see a kaleidescope of colors, a menagerie of faces. Some I know very well, familiar and comfortable. But some, I see and do not recognize.

Wandering the pathways of my soul, I see in the shadows faces that frighten me, and I ask aloud, "Who are you within me?"

I find myself listening to a quiet mountain spring and here, Hope greets me. We hug in a warm embrace. "It brings me joy to find you here my friend."

Hope, kissing my cheek replies, "A bit weary from the journey, but always looking forward." I smile and agree. Yes, a bit weary.

A laugh bubbles from me as I turn and see Joy and Happiness playing in the water. Hearing my laughter they greet me. "So good to see you." "We've missed you," almost on top of each other.

"I've missed you too," I say as Sadness joins us. Pausing, I look into his eyes and can't help but to wipe the tear from his cheek telling him, "Things are looking better now." His gentle smile tells me everything will be alright.

The sun is setting now and Peace joins me. "Come, walk with me awhile." He takes my hand and leads me to the sandy beach. We sit on an aged piece of driftwood and Silence comes. Welcoming this dear old friend with open arms. "Glad you are here," I tell her.

Tranquility laps at our feet, her waves soothing. Looking up I see Passion, her moonbeams falling softly around us. I hear the voice of Desire, but her words elude me. Chaos is grabbing them up in the winds of his hands.

I cry out to him, "Why are you doing that? I wish to hear her!" He laughs at me. "If you have not heard her yet, you never will." His words cause unrest in me. I begin to walk. On and on, seemingly for hours.

Someone taps my shoulder. I turn around and no one is there. Again, someone touches my arm. I whirl, but no one. Confusion has found me and is taunting me. Speaking aloud, my eyes closed, "Why are you here?" In a mocking tone comes the reply, "You think you do not know? Look, seek, and you will find the answer." His laugh echoes in my ears as he leaves.

Opening my eyes, I look around. I do not know this place! Where am I? What am I doing here? Fear wraps his arms around me. Feeling his grip, I struggle to be free. Screaming at him to let me go. The face of Fear becomes Rage as I beat my fists against him. "Why do you torment me so?"

Begging him to let me go, I fall into Despair. Sobs overtake me as I lean heavily against her. Feeling as though I am falling into an abyss to be lost forever.

Trust reaches for me. "Take my hand," he says. "I'll not let you fall." Gingerly I reach out, grasping it, yet I falter.

"I'm right here you know." Only seeing Trust I look around, asking "Who is there?"

"I am," comes the reply. My eyes follow the sound of this new voice and I see Faith. "You've changed," I tell him. "I hardly recognize you." His smile sad as he replies, "No, it is you that has changed."

"Me?"

Trust is still reaching for me. While pondering Faith's words, he lifts me up. "You will be alright. I must go." I plead with him, "Please Trust, don't leave me."

"Leave you? No, I will never leave you. I live within you." He places my hand in Faith's saying, "Listen to your heart and know Faith."

Departing from us, I find myself alone in a wilderness of nothing. "What are you looking for?" asks Faith as I scan my gaze across our surroundings. I tell him I do not know. "Look into my eye," he says. "Tell me what you see there."

Soon becoming lost in their depths, I reply, "I see courage, strength, wisdom, knowledge, peace, serenity, joy, happiness, hope, longsuffering, patience...."

He interrupts me. "I am all these and more. Do you wish for these for eternity?" Whispering, came the sad reply, "Yes, I do, but I've failed you." His smile gentle, his eyes tender, he looks into mine." You still have faith, otherwise I would not be here. And to have faith is to believe in God, and to believe in God is to know forgiveness. Do you belive in God?"

As tears roll down my cheeks, "Yes, I believe in God and I want him for my friend." Faith takes my hand, "Then come with me, I will introduce you."

As we walk, the desolate surroundings give way to the most beautiful place I had ever been. The grass and leaves of the trees were a thousand shades of green. With a twinkle in his eye Faith tells me Green is God's favorite color. The fruit in the trees smell so wonderful. The flowers are beyond imagination. The water that flows nearby sounding like a choir of bells. The air crisp. The sky an incredible blue with clouds seeming as angels.

"Where are we?" I ask. "In My garden," comes the reply. That voice! So soothing and gentle. I look and see the most glorious face. Realizing that Faith has led me to Heavens door, and all I need do to gain entrance is to know this face as my friend. To revere and honor him.

This can't be so hard, I tell myself, but looking back across the path I've come I know it is hard. Oh Lord, look at all the detours I've made. Not the straight and narrow path I've learned about.

"Yes, there are many detours, but as long as you always hold my hand I will guide you. Life is not always easy, the path you tread is ever changing with many forks. To choose which road is most difficult, for you never know what is ahead until it is behind.

Taking His offered hand, I again find myself at the meadow listening to a quiet mountain stream. I am by myself but I am not alone. From the meadow branch many roads. Some narrow, some wide, some straight and some twisting. "Which one?" I ask myself. And in reply comes a gentle squeeze to my hand. I close my eyes, say a quiet prayer and let Him lead me.

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