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ABOUT ME.......
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Hi!
My name is Lisa and these are my kids...err...dogs, Bailey and Scooter.
I had laparoscopic gastric bypass at the St. Vincent's Hospital in Carmel,
IN. on June 6, 2002 and in this picture, I have lost 97 pounds. |
I graduated from high school in 1990 and went on to Indiana University where
I received a B.A......or should I say B.S.... in Anthropology. This degree falls
under the category: "What the hell was I thinking?" Not a
lot of job prospects....
My general lack of planning brought me back home where I held several crappy
jobs before finding something that I enjoy. I currently work as a
Marketing and PR Coordinator for a not-for-profit organization and I love what I
do.
As I write this, I am on my way to turning 31. Lovely. The good news is that I
am also engaged to a wonderful guy and we'll be getting married in October
2003. Together we have 2 beautiful pups, Scooter and Bailey. They
keep us laughing and have given us something to love other than ourselves.
The things that I love...
- Arts and crafts stores. Hobby Lobby is my church...
- Creative writing
- Straight comedy high jinx
- Laughing
- Iced lattes
- Sarcasm; it's what's for breakfast
- Sarcasm; the other white meat
- Straight up sarcasm
- "Slide" by Missy Elliot
- The twinkle in Justin Timberlake's eye
- badunkadunkdunk
- The Sprint commercial with the dachshunds..."I ordered a two-hundred
oxen..."
- A nice, hot shower
- Reading the Sunday paper in bed with a latte by my side
my take on reality shows
- I
REALITY SHOWS!!
- The Real World/Road Rules Battle of the Sexes. (Airing on MTV,
Monday nights on the 10 spot).
So save the drama fo yo'
mama....This is by far, the best entertainment for your money. I live
for this shit...how sad am I?
- The Surreal Life. OMG. Someone put a cork in Webster's mouth before my
head explodes! And will someone please let all the mental institutions
know that Corey Feldman is on the loose and needs his medication....And big
ups go to Gabrielle Carteris for calling Corky...oops...Corey out on the
whole "I-am-vegetarian-for-moral-reasons-but-I-am-currently-wearing-
leather-shoes-but-that's-okay-somehow-on-an-alternate-universe-
where-I-am-revered." Moron.
- Anna Nicole Smith and the gigantic hemorrhoid on her ass, lovingly called
Bobby Trendy. And who can forget, America's sweetheart....Anna's cousin
Shelly. I'm not even going to elaborate on this. If you've seen the
show, you know what I'm talking about. omg.
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That high school reunion reality show on FOX. Man, if I had a dime for every time
I wanted to go back and dick-over all of those who did me wrong....that
would be tight. Damn those restraining orders!
sippin' on the Hater-Ade
- Corey Feldman
- speedos..or as I call them...speedon'ts
- all Hostess® products....bastards!
- Britney Spears - the reigning queen of hell
- soccer moms
- bellybuttons...especially the pierced variety
- elderly drivers....sorry, but it's true...I almost got in a fist fight
with a retired couple who stole my parking spot in Super Target. What does
that say about my character?
- women who wear full on makeup and jewelry at the gym
- guys who wear full on makeup and jewelry at the gym
- telemarketers
- ill-fitting underwear
- J-LO and her boy-bitch...pahleez make it stop!
- cell phone black-out areas
- relying on a cell phone
- corporate greed
- speaker phones. If you put me on speaker phone, I will hang up on
you. Plain and simple. Putting someone on speaker phone (when you are
not on a legitimate conference call) is like saying, "I'm too lazy to
pick up the phone and hold it to my ear." Forget it. Watch
out, here comes a dial tone, jackass....
- my carb addiction
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