being jennifer garrett
Every day an adventure in mediocrity
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Saturday, May 31    

The many uses of the laptop
I've heard concerns about the heat a laptop can generate, especially when actually used on a lap. My iBook has yet to burn my legs. It really doesn't get that warm. Tonight, however, I've discovered that my power adapter is an amazing foot warmer. Sure, I could get up and close my window now that it's gotten cooler, but why bother when this cutie is keeping my tootsies warm?

Disclaimer: Using the Apple AC adapter as a foot warmer is not recommended by the manufacturer. Jen also encourages people who are surprised when coffee is hot and burns them not to use this product.

  posted @ 9:00 PM |


Closets are for clothes
Richard Chamberlain has come out. "I'm not afraid anymore," he says in the article. As a leading man and a romantic figure (I freely admit to falling in love with his Father Ralph when I was oh, 12), he didn't feel he could be open about his sexuality. I don't understand why knowing Richard Chamberlain's sexual orientation has any bearing on Father Ralph and how he really, really loved Meggie. Why can't people divorce actors from characters?

Um, pot, kettle, black, Jen Garrett? You know you were convinced you were going to marry Wil Wheaton, er, Wesley Crusher, when you were 13.

  posted @ 4:21 PM |


Foiled again
I got up today, pleasantly surprised by the sunlight peeking under my curtains and determined to get rid of the pile of wood on my floor. Today, a pile of wood was going to become a bookcase, by golly. I boldly sallied forth to buy stain and realized ... the sun had left. Eh, whatever, I can handle cloudy. I buy the stain (guy at the hardware store was very helpful and I went with a low-lustre clear satin finish), grab a wrap at the Purple Cactus (can't be bothered to make my own food, I've got staining to do!), and head back to the pile of wood.

I put my radio in the window, crank up WBCN, and start taking the wood out onto the porch. I whip out my new sander and ready the planks for their new finish. (On a side note, I am now convinced that sanding is the greatest activity in the world. If you ever need anything sanded, let me know, and I will be on your doorstep in moments, sander in hand). I open the stain, I select my first piece of wood, and there it is: a drop. "Summer sprinkle, no problems," I think -- after all, I can still see the sun. I get the trim piece for the top of the bookcase stained when it become obvious that it is indeed raining.

Some day this mighty pile of wood will be a bookcase, dammit. Just not today.

  posted @ 3:49 PM |

Friday, May 30    

You know you've been working too hard when a) you think the above title is humorous and b) you start to edit other people's blogs. It's a sickness, people. I can't help myself. I am moments away from sending unnamed blogger an e-mail with a few polite tips. Something like:

Dear Unnamed Blogger,
Can we discuss a few things, like your most recent blog? Yeah. Let's talk about sentence structure for a bit, shall we? Okay. Basics: Subject verb. We like it when these two things agree. More on that later. Next: It's a good idea to use a dictionary if you don't know the difference between 'with' and 'will.' Advanced mechanics: When using an em-dash (--) to interrupt a sentence, the sentence needs to be able to function after lifting out that which is enclosed in dashes. For example: Your excellent blog -- which I tend to read daily -- needs an editor.
Much love,
A Concerned Reader
Call me the Grammar Bitch. I can't help it.

  posted @ 11:43 AM |

Thursday, May 29    

Avocation is one of those words that doesn't mean what I think it should mean. Bygones. I have wood on my floor. Yes, a pile of wood lies neatly on my bedroom floor as I type. I know the wood is there, and yet I continue to trip and stumble over it.

You may ask why there is a pile of wood on my bedroom floor -- which, I must admit, is a perfectly reasonable question. Fear not, gentle reader, for I have not lost of my mind and started hoarding wood products. No. My dad gave me a do-it-yourself bookcase kit, and I eagerly ripped it apart to look at it and put it together. After I read the instructions, I realized I needed to stain the wood before assembly.

But I don't have stain. And it keeps raining. Hence, wood on my floor. If this whole writer/editor thing doesn't work out, I'm becoming a carpenter. I like wood. Just not on my floor. Unless we're talking hardwood floors, but that's a whole other blog entirely.

  posted @ 10:47 PM |


Oh, one of those days
Ever had one of those days when you wanted to rip your face off?

No? Okay.

  posted @ 9:20 AM |


Holy freaky server, Batman
I can't get the Blogger main page to load, so I was despairing mightily of my lack of blogging power today. I thought I might as well try my "BlogThis!" button just for kicks, and lo and behold, I could BlogThis!

However, I still can't get into my account to, I don't know, edit my posts. So if I make a mistake, please don't torture me by e-mailing me about it, because I can't fix it.

If I don't make a mistake, however, please feel free to e-mail me and tell me what an amazing and kick-ass editor I am.

Update: Blogger let me back in. All editing mistakes are now due to my total ignorance.

  posted @ 8:12 AM |


One, two, three...
I can hardly believe it, but a high schooler in Pennsylvania was actually bored (or bold) enough to organize a rock, paper, scissors tournament. He made it to the finals, but was not the ultimate winner. Best two out of three?

  posted @ 8:03 AM |

Wednesday, May 28    

And you think baseball is slow
Softball game sets record with 26 innings: Even I don't like to watch sports for that long. They had to take an intermission for a bathroom break, for chrissakes.

  posted @ 10:49 AM |


Note to self
Stop watching creepy, disturbing movies alone.

Oh, yeah, and stop watching Ed Norton and Ralph Fiennes movies altogether.

  posted @ 10:38 AM |

Tuesday, May 27    

Dial D for idiots
I saw Bruce Almighty this weekend but didn't give much thought to the real phone number they gave as God's call-back line. Some part of my brain recognized that it wasn't the 555 exchange they are supposed to use, but I was really just too busy trying to pry my new LifeSavers Minis from their mini-tin. Otherwise, the flick was okay, and I continue to think that Jennifer Aniston has an oddly shaped jaw.

  posted @ 9:20 AM |

Monday, May 26    

A day without blogging is like...
A day without sunshine. Which is exactly what we've had in Boston for the last 5000 days. I'm building my ark. Fall in two by two, people.

  posted @ 8:14 PM |

Saturday, May 24    

Home improvement
I love TLC's Trading Spaces, and not just because I love to watch innocent people get their houses made over in new and intriguingly hideous designs. I am cheap for Vern Yip, people. I stayed up tonight in order to watch an episode he was going to be on. He has yet to design a room that I hated or even mildly disliked. He's amazing. Why can't he come to my place and redesign it? I'm sure all that is needed for my life and my house to be perfect is an upgrade from Vern.

(To witness just how fabulous your life isn't, check out Vern's before and after shots.)

  posted @ 10:43 PM |


My gendered life
As I mentioned yesterday, my dad is in town. Today is his birthday, so wish him a happy one if you see him. The sisters and I are buying him a digital camera for the auspicious occasion, so don't be surprised if there are a few "technology can bite me" blogs whilst I try to make sure the thing actually works in such a way that my dad can use it.

Since my dad has been here, we've talked about: blogging, the internet, cell phones, digital cameras, laptops, operating systems, HTML, tools and the build-it-yourself bookcase my dad bought me, the war, politics, the Sox/the Reds/the Indians and Fenway Park, and cars. It's a raging stereotype, but it's true. I forget that I don't have that many male pespectives in my life (what do you expect? I work at Wellesley), and it's always nice to hear them weigh in on things.

  posted @ 9:24 AM |

Friday, May 23    

Playing hooky
I'm not at work today as I am taking a well-earned day off. Yet I still feel compelled to check in with work, make sure I'm not missing anything important. Perhaps I have been spending a little too much time at work lately.

I'm off for lunch with my dad, who is in town for the weekend. Much familial goodness this weekend -- look out. I'll either be extremely cranky or I won't be blogging. Don't miss me too much.

  posted @ 7:59 AM |

Thursday, May 22    

Nothin' but net
Swoopes put in 27 points for the Comets as they swept past the Seattle Storm in the WNBA season opener last night. Cooper added 11 points and 7 assists, and Thompson did not play. Bird put up a strong 19 points, but could not lead her team to victory. I wish I could have seen this one; I love it when Swoopes comes on strong. She is amazing on the court, people.

  posted @ 9:01 PM |


It's showtime, baby
Showtime is creating a new original series, The L Word. Yep, and it's about lesbians. What's beyond exciting about the news is that it features Katherine Moennig (okay, not only did I watch Young Americans, but she was my favorite part of the show. I love teen TV, okay? Leave me alone) as well as Laurel Holloman, aka Randy from The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls in Love and a recent player on Angel.

I'm going to have to add Showtime to my cable package. Damn.

Thanks to Pam for the heads-up.

  posted @ 12:16 PM |


Why would you want anyone to wait for you like a stone? This is the question that plagues me whilst listening to my new Audioslave CD. Said disk, by the by, kicks ass, despite the question which haunts me like a bad shoe.

  posted @ 10:10 AM |


Inspiration in the morning
Stone sent me this, and it inspired me to create one of my own (see below, right column). I used Fireworks, but this online button maker is also good times.

  posted @ 7:26 AM |

Wednesday, May 21    

The dreamlife of me
I've never been able to remember endings -- books, movies, you name it. Ask me who did it, and I won't be able to tell you. I'll be able to describe the story in pretty good detail, but my memory will taper off just before it becomes obvious what the actual ending is. It comes in handy for not spoiling things for people. However, today I couldn't remember the plot of The Dreamlife of Angels. I was pretty certain I'd seen it (and, after reading the reviews, I definitely have), but I couldn't remember anything about it. I remember it was sad in the end. That's all. This memory failure is either because the movie is French or because I'm getting old. Next movie I forget we'll know for sure what the causality is.

  posted @ 12:53 PM |


Let the countdown begin
Tomorrow is opening day for the WNBA season. I can't wait to see the Liberty play the Sun, and the Comets play the Sparks (frankly, I would watch the Comets play anyone just to see the triumvirate of power in action). Vera Jones weighes in with her games to keep an eye on in the season ahead.

You thought I was going to let a blog go by without some bitterness, didn't you? Not going to happen. Why can't I watch any games on f'ing opening day? Houston plays Seattle in the season opening game. I'm dying to see upstart Sue Bird go against seasoned veterans Swoopes, Cooper, and Thompson. Will I get to see it? Will anyone get to see it who isn't in the arena? No. The first televised game is Saturday at 4 on ABC (Connecticut versus L.A.). Watch it.

  posted @ 8:36 AM |


What price equality?
A group of Massachusetts teens have filed a federal lawsuit against the male-only Selective Service System. The suit argues women should be drafted, or eligible for the draft, just like men.

"U.S. District Court Judge Edward F. Harrington did not rule in the case, but asked Schwartz whether America is prepared to draft 18-year-old women. 'I tend to disbelieve at this stage, this is what the American public wants,'' he said."

This should be a question of law, fairness, equality -- not a matter for public opinion. If women are allowed into combat -- as men are, not in "limited roles" -- then we should be signing up for the draft at 18, along with our male counterparts.

  posted @ 7:13 AM |


I'm not yellow, I'm chicken
The Martha mystery is solved, thanks to Adam, who found that: " 'It's a good thing' is followed by a (tm)." He then dared me to go to her site for confirmation.

I'm not afraid of Martha.

  posted @ 6:12 AM |

Tuesday, May 20    

Too hot for words
It's been well documented that I get markedly crankier as the temperature rises. It's around 80 degrees here in Beantown today, and, true to form, I'm in a wonderfully pissy mood. It's really not hot enough for me to be this cranky; I'm not that much of a heat wuss. Perhaps it's because it's the first really warm day of the season? Perhaps it's because work is simultaneously winding down and winding up? Perhaps the stars are misaligned. I don't know.

Needless to say, the state of brow-furrowing general schmeggle has not enabled me to compose my thoughts on the whole Annika Sorenstam situation. I've been reading a lot of opinions (for some good reads, check here and here), but I'm ambivalent. Part of me thinks, why shouldn't she play with the boys if that's what she wants, but another part of me thinks she's hurting the cause of women's sports. Why do we have women's leagues? Because, to be brutally honest, the majority of women athletes can not successfully compete against men. We're just different physically. So my problem is really the general attitude of society that women's sports aren't as good as men's sports -- women athletes are amazing. Why do we have to compare disparate things? Perhaps it's the nature of competition.

  posted @ 11:16 AM |


A good thing?
I have had a blog request from beloved roomie Jen. After watching Martha, Inc. last night, Jen was curious as to why they hadn't used Martha's catchphrase, "It's a good thing." Now both Jens are curious if this little phrase is somehow trademarked or copyrighted. However, Jen will not let me enter what she refers to as the Martha Stewart Portal, so I cannot investigate fully. Anyone who is not liable to be sucked into Martha's vortex, please let me know what you find out about this situation.

(And by the way, Cybill Shepherd was amazing as Martha. I never knew anyone could chew scenery like that.)

  posted @ 6:32 AM |


Humans do it better
I have few talents in this world, but those I do possess, I possess in abundance. I kick ass at the Kevin Bacon game. No f'ing computer-generated Baconizer can beat me.

Case in point: Vivien Leigh in Gone with the Wind to Winona Ryder in Heathers. Computer: 13 steps. Jen Garrett: 4. Vivien Leigh (GWtW) was in A Streetcar Named Desire with Marlon Brando, who was in Don Juan DeMarco with Johnny Depp, who was in Benny & Joon with Mary Stuart Masterson, who was in Bed of Roses with Christian Slater, who was in Heathers with Winona Ryder. (I could have just connected Johnny to Winona through Edward Scissorhands, but I needed a Heathers link.)

  posted @ 6:13 AM |

Monday, May 19    

Just one calorie, not evil enough
Most of the time, I would characterize myself as mean. Or at least cranky. Or, as my boss put it so eloquently, "slightly abrasive." Which is why it always surprises me when I make someone else happy. It's a nice feeling. Not that I'm going to turn all nice on you (not possible), but every once in a while, it's good to switch things up.

  posted @ 11:26 AM |


Mac love
It's okay to love your computer, just don't love your computer: The Mac that Lego built.

Link courtesy of James. Movie quote rip-off courtesy of yours truly.

  posted @ 6:29 AM |

Sunday, May 18    

My I-don't-have-to-run day
The best Sundays start with phone calls that wake you up at 1 pm. Especially when they are from one of the few people in the world who make you happy to be woken up.

I think I'm going to make my maiden voyage onto the deck. Especially since I just realized if I open my window and raise the screen, I can take my computer on the deck with me and still be online. Yeah, I was going to read a book, but why would I do that when I could blog instead?

And in other happy news, Audioslave's "Cochise" is a fucking good song.

  posted @ 11:39 AM |

Saturday, May 17    

Rage against the machine
I went to see The Matrix: Reloaded today. My reactions, in brief:

Wow. That is cool. Dude, that is sweet. Oh, c'mon, that looked totally fake. Dude, that is cool. Wait, I'm not blinking. Why aren't I blinking? I should blink. (blink) That hurt. Whoa! That was cool. Remember to blink. Carrie-Anne Moss should wear that shiny outfit all the time. Okay, that was lame. Why is Laurence Fishburne constantly talking like he's delivering a speech? Remember to blink. I should blink again. Isn't that Rage Against the Machine? Oh, the irony. This is a good song. I wish I knew kung fu. I love it when they blow shit up. Gotta blink again. I want to see the preview for the next one, but these are the longest credits I've ever seen. I'll just close my eyes. It's better than blinking.

  posted @ 8:28 PM |


I'm currently a member or owner of five blogs. I think I may have taken this blogging thing a little too far. I should probably interact with real people at some point...nah. I'll be seeing the Matrix this afternoon. That should be good enough.

So if you're not getting enough Jen Garrett from reading me here, you can look for me here, or here, or maybe even here.

Oh, damn, I forgot my two top-secret blogging-initiative blogs. Make that seven.

  posted @ 8:00 AM |

Friday, May 16    

Picky, picky, picky
I really need to go to the grocery store. I came home from work tonight, decided I needed to, I don't know, eat dinner, and looked in the cupboard. Yeah, it was bare, baby. Luckily, I had tuna on hand so I could make a sandwich. Problem 1: I had no bread. As chance would have it, I had buns from when I was going to make hamburgers, but didn't. Okay, problem 2: I had a teaspoon of Miracle Whip left. Before you go off on how disgusting Miracle Whip is, I will remind you that I'm from Ohio. This shit is haute cuisine to us. Plus, I don't like the taste of real mayonaisse. It's too...eggy. I had to use 2/3 real mayo to make up the difference. The sandwich was surprisingly good. But that may be attributed to the fact that I was a little hungry. Dinner at 10 pm will do that to you.

Second picky thing: Leigh's blog is getting as much traffic as I am. Not that I'm bitter.

Third picky thing: F'ing new Blogger appears to be giving the shaft to Mac users. Now, I'm used to this in general, but I resent using the "LoFi" version of anything 'cause y'all like MicrokissmyassSoft. Maybe I'm reading the release notes wrong. I don't like being mad at Blogger. I've gotten to like them in the last few months.

Fourth and final thing: I'm watching Catch Me If You Can tonight, and I'm really enjoying the extended opening credits. They're very cool -- very sixties, very smooth. At the same time I'm appreciating this old school methodology, I'm thinking, "Start the movie already!"

What can I say? I'm one impatient bitch.

  posted @ 8:45 PM |


I've been scooped!
This morning I made a blog for my friend and esteemed co-worker, Leigh. Whilst I was ironing out the kinkage in the template, posting, e-mail, site stats, etc., Stone unveiled it on his blog, where the Redhead saw it and laughed.

So you heard it here...last.

  posted @ 2:32 PM |


It's . . . orange
April and Leigh bought me my first LiveWire Mountain Dew this morning. Yes, I know I said that I would never drink this stuff, but I haven't been grocery shopping in approximately 800 years, so this morning I was out of the Dew. And, the website is quick to point out that "LiveWire has the same caffeine level as Regular Mountain Dew." And we're on deadline. I need the juice, people.

As for the taste...well, it tasted orange. Not orange like the delicious citrus fruit, but like the color. (Anyone who has lived in Ohio or has tasted the culinary delight that is RedPop knows how colors can have flavors.) It tasted orange with kind of a bitter Dew aftertaste. I don't know if this is the "tongue-zapping orange ignited flavor only Mountain Dew can deliver" that the advertising promises or not, but I'm pretty sure I won't be drinking this again.

  posted @ 6:04 AM |

Thursday, May 15    

Impotent rage
Most of the time, I try to control my urge to destroy everything in sight when I get angry. And usually, I try not to blog angry. But, fuck it. Seeing shit like "Gov. Jeb Bush to Seek Guardian for Fetus of Rape Victim" makes my blood boil.

"Given the facts of this case, it is entirely appropriate that an advocate be appointed to represent the unborn child's best interests in all decisions," Governor Bush says.

So, in addition to the guardian of the woman, there should be a guardian for the fetus. And what happens when the two guardians disagree on the best course of action? Who overrides whom? The question of abortion hasn't even been raised by the parties involved. This is just an underhanded way of "trying to set a precedent in establishing legal protection for fetuses." I understand that the woman in question isn't deemed capable of making decisions about her own body, her own health, but if people like Bush have their way, no woman would be capable of making those decisions.

I'm going to go break some shit now. Be right back.

  posted @ 8:11 AM |

Wednesday, May 14    

Bad editor, bad
Oh, the shame. I just realized that a post of mine contained a spelling error. Not because someone e-mailed me or I noticed it myself with my bad-ass editor skills. No.

I realized it because someone who entered a search query on Google misspelled the word too. And found my site. I deserve 30 lashes for this one. Perhaps 'tis time for a little self-flagellation. Or to get spell-check.

  posted @ 7:48 PM |


Be sure to wear flowers in your hair
April just came by to give me a flower. Actually, it was a dandelion, which most consider to be a weed.

Because I'm the kind of girl who would not wear flowers in her hair. Now, weeds, on the other hand ...

  posted @ 8:55 AM |


Not as good as iambic pentameter, but . . .
We've been having a lot of network issues at work due, in part, to increased spam (everyone's favorite luncheon meat). Normally, spam doesn't bother me much, but I deeply resent anything that messes with the regular delivery of much-needed e-mail. Which is why Spamku just made my morning.

  posted @ 6:13 AM |

Tuesday, May 13    

Don't Mess with Texas
Sometimes you have to love the Democratic leadership: 58 Democrats disappeared on Sunday, leaving the Texas House without a quorum.

"State troopers found Democratic lawmakers in Oklahoma after they brought the Texas House to a standstill by going into hiding, but the legislators declined to return to the state Capitol."

Better than a filibuster, I tell you.

  posted @ 1:45 PM |


I don't like change
Just when I'd almost gotten used to the new bills with their oddly huge heads, they go and change my money again.

Money is supposed to be green! This design looks like rainbow sherbet, people. Luckily for me, I never have any money so I won't have to look at this much.

  posted @ 1:29 PM |


My so-called Hollywood Life
There are only a few magazines I subscribe to: TV Guide, Women's Basketball, SI:Women (sadly now a Health magazine subscription), and Movieline. I think it's obvious why I subscribe to TV Guide; on-screen guides are great but I hate scrolling and I like to plan ahead. Plus, I can do the crossword no problem. WB and SI:Women -- hello, chicks playing sports. I'm on it. Movieline -- now that is a magazine I have loved since it was an upstart back in the day. I have a subscription already for the next two years.

Which is why my latest issue came as a shock. Movieline has morphed into Movieline's Hollywood Life. When I saw this, I wanted to hurl the repellent thing as far from me as possible. Then my saner mind took over and insisted I read it first. Maybe it was the same funny, irreverent look at movies that I have always loved, but just with a lame new name.

Alas, no. It's an InStyle wannabe. It's neither substance nor fluff, but somewhere in between, trying to please everyone.

And, on a separate criticism, if the new focus is "Hollywood life" (aka style), why the hell choose Lisa Kudrow as your first cover girl?

  posted @ 10:48 AM |

Sunday, May 11    

Just an old-fashioned girl
We've covered my remarkable lack of techno-savy-ness despite my inherent geekiness before, but I have to revisit. Because every time I see someone write PDA, I think "public display of affection." I'm slowly forcing myself to think "Palm Pilot" when I see those letters, but my brain is stubborn and old-fashioned. PDA will forever be linked with TMI for me. FYI.

  posted @ 11:00 PM |


Wanted: Alternate reality, for part-time use
It was strange to see my mom in alternate digs, ones that I have never, and will never, live in. I envied her a little; as much as I hate to move, there is something exciting about it, a piece of freedom in all that blank space to call your own. I wanted so badly to call a do-over to my life, or to split off into a separate person so I could choose different paths, live in different places, find some blank space of my own.

  posted @ 8:06 PM |

Saturday, May 10    

Moving on up
Today is one of those days when I really wish I had a nifty digital camera to take around me with me snapping pictures so I could post them here later. You'll just have to take my word for it that my sister, her boyfriend, my mom, and I will be moving two tons of my mom's stuff today. And it will be bizarrely fun.

Except for the Victrola. Yes, my mother owns a Victrola, which, for the philistines out there, is an antique record player. And by antique I mean really really old. And by really really old I mean, made out of wood that weighs 8,000 pounds. Luckily, I'm freakishly strong.

  posted @ 9:17 AM |

Friday, May 9    

I am sorry to report that I am not my usual bundle of light and joy shining in the darkness of the internet.

I should have known something was wrong this morning. When I woke up, both my hands were asleep ... because I had been sleeping with my arms militantly crossed. Why? I was dreaming that I was at a basketball game, and at half-time, I was yelling at John Stockton and the other players for not playing well: "What was that?!? What are you doing?!? You call this basketball? John is retiring this year! I may never get to see him play again! I want to see someone step up and play!"

  posted @ 12:50 PM |


You get what you pay for
MSN's article, Baccalaureate bargains, claims to name the top 100 college bargains.

Wellesley is not on that list. 1) It's not a public institution. 2) It's expensive as hell. I knew that when I chose it at 18. I chose it anyway. And I chose it knowing full well that I would have to find a way to pay for all of it. My parents couldn't pay for it. I didn't have any savings. I was smart, so I had a few scholarships and Wellesley gave me a substantial grant (thank god). The rest I made up in loans. I will admit that I didn't really know at 18 the consequences of taking out all those loans -- 10 years of debt -- but I knew that I had to go to Wellesley. And I have never regretted my decision.

But I have to remind myself of these things every time I make my loan payments, every time I think about living alone or buying a house, and every time I even think about my debt-to-income ratio. Last night, I had to remind myself of this a lot.

Sallie Mae (everyone's favorite loan shark) sent me a lovely letter yesterday. It turns out that Sallie Mae made a mistake and has been undercharging my loan payments for months. They found their error and will be charging me more every month for the remainder of my loans so I can still pay them off in the standard 10-year period. They were very sorry for the error.

Repeat after me: I am not sorry I went to Wellesley, I am not sorry I went to Wellesley...

  posted @ 10:50 AM |


Melancholy baby
I lost a piece of my past last night.

Well, okay. I didn't actually lose it last night, but last night I realized it was lost. I looked and I looked, and despite my propensity to keep everything I have ever written on, it was gone. The notebook containing the story I wrote when I was 13 is gone. I helped my mom move a few months ago, and I went on a dangerous chucking spree. I was reckless. I thought I knew what I was throwing away. I thought I saved everything that was important.

I was wrong.

  posted @ 8:28 AM |

Thursday, May 8    

Just what we needed
Another way to track whether or not people are reading your meaningless drivel: Daypop Weblog Statistics.

I used to write notes (and then letters) to a friend of mine, and in every missive, I'd include the line "this note is totally meaningless." But they weren't -- each letter was a way to connect with him, to share a bit of myself in the hopes that I would get a bit of him in return. I've been thinking a lot today about what I write, why I write it, who I write it for. (I tend to think more when I want to work less.) I haven't come to any conclusions, so I think I'll check my blogstats again.

  posted @ 12:33 PM |


An open book
Apparently I am not the mysterious figure I'd like to think I am, as our temp just pegged me as I was grabbing a cupcake.

Jen: "And the cupcakes disappear as we descend like the ravaging hordes..."
Temp: "You must have been an English major."

  posted @ 7:53 AM |

Wednesday, May 7    

Credit where credit is due
Pam e-mailed me today: "Angie checked out 'being jennifer garrett' today and was very upset that she was not credited for making the whole tv shopping adventure happen. Angie reminds you that she is not taupe or another offensive color and that she thought you and she were friends."

As I mentioned before, Jen and I bought a TV this weekend. It is 27 inches, an upgrade from our old 19-incher, and it came in a box which more than amply padded it. The boys at Best Buy asked us what kind of car we were driving (Pam was supplying her infinitely adorable VW Golf), and repeatedly encouraged us to use their delivery option after we told them of our means of transport.

They may have scoffed, but Angie (aka lovely blue Golf) was more than up to the task. We folded down the back seat, put in the TV, put in Jen, put in the bags from Target, the lawn chairs from Target, and the clothes from Old Navy, and then Pam and I lounged in comfort in the front.

Moral of the story: Never underestimate a Golf.

  posted @ 11:56 AM |


A little of the ultraviolence
I saw Kill Bill over at Turns out it's not a blog, but a site about Quentin Tarantino's fourth film. Which I hadn't even heard of yet. It stars Uma Thurman, so I'm a little suspect, but I'm still excited to see it.

Resevoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, and the underrated Jackie Brown are some of my favorite flicks. This one looks like Quentin takes the ultraviolence where everyone else already has: Asia. I'm interested to see his spin (similar to his look at blaxploitation films with Jackie?), but I gotta admit I'm already a little bored with the genre. (And yeah, I was really bored with it when it popped up on Buffy last night.)

  posted @ 9:10 AM |


Air Guitar
What happened to the guitar solo? Am I the only one who misses them?

I slipped in Led Zeppelin II this morning and while I was playing air guitar in between shifting gears, I realized that my current tastes (which have their own charms) really don't have good guitar back-up. This makes me sad.

Because I play amazing air guitar.

  posted @ 6:28 AM |

Tuesday, May 6    

Color Me Happy
Before I forget: Jen adds "champagne" to the lengthy list of car colors we hate.

  posted @ 8:08 AM |


This place is smokin'
But not anymore: Smoking ban in effect in Boston. The Board of Heath has banned smoking in the workplace -- sounds like a good idea, right? Well, let's not forget that thousands of bartenders, waitresses, hostesses, etc., are working too, which means no more smoking in bars, clubs, and restaurants.

I'm torn. I don't smoke; I hate the smell of smoke in my clothes and hair after a night on the town; I can't wait to go to a club or bar and have a drink and not come home with a vicious headache from the smoke. But are we going too far? At what point do we have to say the government should stop interfering in the minute-by-minute of our lives?

  posted @ 7:16 AM |

Monday, May 5    

Happy Cinco de Mayo!
Jen, Pam, and I celebrated tonight with guacamole and tacos. Whilst eating way too much food (what is it about tacos that make them so addictive?), we realized that none of us actually knew what Cinco de Mayo was commemorating. After musing on how pathetic and sad that was, we ate some more tacos. And then Jen made some yummy chocolate thingy in ramekins. (Why are those little ceramic dishes called ramekins anyway? Further food mysteries.)

I thought I would go online and find the answers to all my fifth of May questions. Okay, I actually only had one question: what happened on May 5? According to this site, 4,000 Mexican soliders defeated a French/Mexican army of 8,000 in Puebla on this day in 1862, eventually leading to Mexican independence.

Now you know.

  posted @ 7:02 PM |


Messing with my head
I wanted to title this "Mind Fuck," but I thought I should try to keep the titles PG-13 at least. I watched In the Company of Men yesterday; I'd been putting it off as one of those things I knew I should do, but that I really didn't want to. What struck me wasn't misogyny, it was misanthropy. (Although I did really enjoy the quote that went something like this: Women are all the same -- "nothing inside but meat, gristle, and hatred." You betcha.) Aaron Eckhart's character is just a mean bastard; he hates women no more than he hates everyone else. I'm glad I finally saw where Neil LaBute started, and I'm glad I found someone who is actually meaner than I am. Okay, so he's fictional, but I'll take what I can get.

And once I was done with that exquisite piece of mind-scrunching, I watched the two-hour season finale of Alias. I don't want to spoil anything for anyone, but what the hell was that ending? I felt like Kathy Bates in Misery! You can't do that! That's not right!

  posted @ 7:16 AM |

Sunday, May 4    

A poll
Which word makes you more pissed off: taupe or mauve?

A tough call.

  posted @ 1:37 PM |

Saturday, May 3    

The cure for what ails you
AKA, the web. I don't know why, but I don't want to go to sleep. I'm tired, it's late, I've already brushed my teeth, why not go to bed? But I surf instead.

I found some annoying "my community is better than your lame community" talk over at Metafilter re: the new MetaPop. Not interested. Surf what you want to surf, people. Don't be such elitest snobs, because you're not all that and a bag of chips. I, however, am becoming a bag of chips -- I had them for breakfast and lunch today. I really should eat better.

I moved on to surf Blogger, and found their new list of recently updated blogs, which was extremely helpful in my quest to continue surfing. That page led me to this page, which was good because I was just despairing over my inability to remember any Spanish, despite eight years of study. I think I understood most of what I was reading, but who knows? It can be more fun to take liberties with translation anyway.

Maybe I'll read a little of 'Salem's Lot. Stephen King is always good when you want to fall asleep, right?

  posted @ 10:41 PM |


Shop 'til you drop
I don't know what it is, but there is something so satisfying about shopping -- buying good stuff, spending money you don't have -- it adds up to a fun afternoon. Jen and I bought a new TV for the living room; we actually needed it because the old one a) was a Daewoo; and b) was inhabited by spirits that decided that we didn't really need to watch Dawson's Creek just because it was on.

We also bought lawn furniture for our deck. I can't wait. Every nice day from now on, if you need me, you can find me out back in the chaise lounge, reading a book and sipping a 'rita.

  posted @ 6:22 PM |

Friday, May 2    

The world definitely ain't right today
Am I really the only person who is disgusted by young girls in highly sexualized clothes? This model is 12. Twelve. I still played with Barbies when I was 12.

Our society is going to hell in a handbasket. First, they make cars in taupe, and now pre-adolescents are selling sex under the guise of fashion.

I'm going home.

Via Ms. Musings

  posted @ 5:40 AM |


Do like I told you, stay away from me
I don't know what is wrong with the world today, but every jerk-off in a taupe Nissan or Toyota decided to cut me off this morning. I had to put in the Godsmack and play it really loudly (you know you've reached maximum sound density when you can feel the reverb in your fillings). And I don't know why it made me more angry that their cars were taupe, for chrissakes, but it did.

If you live in the area, I don't recommend doing 85 mph down Rt. 9 in Wellesley, but it sure as hell felt good as soon as I found an open stretch of road.

  posted @ 5:25 AM |

Thursday, May 1    

No additives or preservatives
I did it: I upgraded my Angelfire account.

I give you: being jennifer garrett, now 100% ad-free.

If you still see ads, let me know so I can bitch out Angelfire.

  posted @ 1:10 PM |


She's back
The WNBA really isn't that different from the NBA: Cynthia Cooper, arguably one of the best players ever, is coming out of retirement and returning to the Houston Comets. Now if MJ had made a return to the Bulls, that would have been cool.

The press is giving this play as if her return will assure the Comets a return to league champions. I'm not so sure, but the Comets did win four straight titles with the 1-2-3 punch of Swoopes, Cooper, and Thompson. Watch out, Sparks.

  posted @ 8:22 AM |

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